Work Text:
Peter sat in his room, bowed over his homework. It was late, he knew it was late and yet he stayed up, desperately trying to do his math homework. He wasnt even halfway, although he started over an hour ago, and the numbers were dizzying his head. Alright, it wasn’t like he was doing a small amount of homework. But he also knew that some of his classmates could easily fill this homeworksheet out in 15 minutes.
He was resting his head on his right hand, while he used his left to write down the numbers and letters to solve the equations. His fingers were tangled in his hair, to keep himself away with a sudden tug now and then.
Stupid, stupid, stupid. Was echoing through his head, in a voice sounding suspiciously like his fathers, Tony Stark. The fact he was an obvious genius didn't help Peter feel more confident. No, Peter was a star in English and History and even Art. All the subjects his father thought were useless. Chemistry, Physics and Mathematics made his head swim and ache. He just wasn’t good at those subject. He used to ask his father for help, but he’d stopped doing that a while ago.
It was a Thursay evening. The next day he had a test about Physics. He knew the test would be specifically targeted on how to use certain equations, the exact point he was strugglingnwith the most. While in class, Peter didn’t have a problem with calculating using those very same equations. The help of his teacher or friends made it easy to apply them. But whenever he had to figure it out himself it was like there was a big cloud of fog travelling through his head. He just could’t remember. He looked at the living room, where his Tony and Pepper were watching a television series. Carefully he asked:
“Dad? Could you maybe help me with this homework?” Tony stood up immediately, while Pepper paused the show in the background.
“What is it?” Tony was always ready to help his son. He looked over the boy in questions shoulder at what he was doing. Peter exhaled relieved and pointed at what he was struggling with.
“I don’t remember on how to use this one.” Peter said. He hadn’t even finished or his father pulled out a chair and sat down next to him.
“Oh, I remember this. Tell me Peter, aren’t you a little too old to learn this stuff?” he asked.
“Well, apparently not, if my teacher decided she would.” Peter almost said this, but instead he uttered a simple: “I have a test about this tomorrow and I still don’t get it.”
“It’s really simple-“ For about half an hour Tony explained exactly how they worked. But eventually Peter got the idea that his father was pretty fed up with explaining. That didn’t stop him from asking one last question though. He thought he almost had it and he wanted to ask one more thing so he’d be fully prepared for tomorrow.
“So if I put 55 on the place of P I’ll get the answer?” He asked.
“No Peter. Honestly, did you even pay attention while I explained this? Even if it is getting late, it isn’t polite or smart to not pay attention while someone explains something to you.”
“I was paying attention!” Peter exclaimed.
“Well, I didn’t notice. Next time you’ll really have to ask me earlier if you dont get such a little thing. The thing I don’t get is why you still don’t.”
“Tony!” Pepper exclaimed.
“I’m only saying that when I was his age I was doing much more advanced stuff. This is childsplay!”
“Not everyone is a genius, Tony” Pepper said.
“No, he’s right. I should get this already. Maybe I’m just tired, I’m going to bed.” Peter quickly gathered his books and pens and almost ran towards his room.
Since that day, Peter didn’t come to his father for help anymore. It was too embarrasing. He looked up at his alarm and saw it was already 12am. He would ususally be asleep by now, but now he didn't have anyone to help him with his homework, he had to get used to long nights. He’d have to stay up until he was finished. While it wasn’t the brightest idea to save Math for last, he hadn't thought that it would take this long. It was late, which meant he didn’t have that much focus and he was doing the hardest subject of them all. Bad idea.
He yawned.
Maybe he’d get away with it if he only made the last Math problems, so he was able to claim he just didn’t understand the ones he missed. Which was technically true.
He looked at the last sum and sighed. It was the longest one yet. He put his pen to paper and started again.
---
The first thing Peter felt when he woke up was cramp. His neck was stiff and his back was screaming for attention. When he looked at his alarm he noticed it was only 2am. He had fallen asleep on top of his homework. Great. There was a huge streak of pen through his answers, from when he had fallen asleep, probably.
He stood up, placed his paper in a neat pile and walked over to his bed. He pulled off his socks and jeans and immediately fell asleep in his hoodie.
---
This pattern repeated itself for weeks. Peter got more and more tired, Pepper got more and more worried and Tony remained blisfully unaware. His friends looked more relaxed now that they didn´t have to explain every little detail to Peter anymore and. Tony probably thought he had the kid-genius he always dreamt of.
Peter yawned way more often. At home, during class, when he woke up and when he went to bed. It never stopped. He was always cold and super exhausted. Every evening he was leaning over his fucking homework, and everytime when he thought he had finally caught up to the rest of his classmates, the teachers introduced something new. Teachers started to notice and he was asked multiple times if everything was alright at home and if he slept well. To which he always nodded and said he just had trouble falling asleep at night.
Teachers thought that to be the end of it and left him alone, mostly.
Peter was at the dinnertable with his parents at the moment, pushing his food around his plate slowly. They were talking about something Tony achieved at work today. He wasn’t really paying attention anyways.
“Peter, is everything alright?” Pepper interrupted her husband.
“Everything is A-O-K” Peter answered automatically.
“It’s just, you look so tired lately. How about you stay home tomorrow and catch some more sleep, because this is getting ridiculous.”
Peter started to defend himself immediately. “No, no. Everything is fine, don’t worry. I just have trouble falling asleep in the evening as of late, that’s all.”
“Are you sure? I can make a phonecall or send an email in a matter of seconds, honey.”
“Pepper, the kid said it’s nothing. Let’s trust him to step to us if there’s a problem.” Said Tony.
“Exactly.” Peter supplied.
“No, there is something going on and you’re going to tell me because this can’t go on any longer.”
“Alright, alright..” Peter sighed defeated. “I’ll tell you sometime. Not now.”
“Good.”
The previous conversation was picked up again. Peter quickly finished his plate and made his way upstairs. He immediately grabbed his bookbag and pulled out Chemistry. Next week he would have a test and he needed to revise as much as possible before then.
---
A soft knock pulled Peter out of his concentration. He looked up and saw Pepper standing in the doorway.
“Hi Peter, do you mind if we talk right now? Maybe you could tell me what’s bothering you so badly.” She walked inside and sat down on Peters bed. A brief silence followed. “What are you doing right now?”
“Homework.” Peter answered. He wrote down the last word and layed down his pencil. He turned in his chair so he was directly facing his mother. “I have a test in a about a week.”
“How responsible to already prepare yourself.”
“Thanks.”
“Peter, I am worried about you. You’re barely downstairs anymore, you always look tired and you’re more closed off than ever.” Pepper wore a worried expression, that broke Peters resolve to not speak up.
“I am just so tired of my homework mom, I can barely keep up. I’m trying my hardest but it’s just so hard and I’m so tired.” Said Peter.
“Alright, tell me more about it.” Pepper said. “Do you need help, can we assist you in any way?”
“It’s just so hard. Physics, chemistry, math, dad is great at them al land I just suck at it. I like art, I’m actually good at art and english but I need physics, chemistry and math to actually pass this year.”
“Why don’t you ask your father for help?”
“Help with what?” Tony’s voice sounded from behind Peter, who turned around and saw his father walk into his room.
“Nothing!” Peter said quickly.
“I think there was something there.” Tony said.
“Everything is fine.” Peter said, not fooling his father who walked to Peter and looked over his shoulder at what his son was doing.
“What’s this, bambino?” he asked. Peter readjusted his books so they covered the notes with the little notes that would make him look dumb. “Chemistry.” Peter said.
“Ah, one of the greatest things to ever be invented, ever. Nice to see you study seriously.” Tony said.
It was like there was a knot tied around Peters heart that tugged harshly, tightening furiously. “Yep. You know me. The serious studier.” Peter replied in a pained tone.
“Kid, are you okay?” Tony asked worried. Peter shook his head. “Nope.” He said. “I just can’t do it anymore.”
“Can’t do what anymore?” Tony asked.
“All of this.” Peter gestured at his notes.
“Well, let me take a look.” Tony scanned the pages quickly. “Oh, this is the easy stuff.”
The imaginary knot around Peters heart just went up into flames with anger.
“What’s easy for you is hell to me. I don’t understand a single thing that’s written here. I suck at this, I barely have any free time because the only thing I’m doing is this bulllshit of homework that I’ll never get good at.”
“Not if you look at it that negatively.”
“This is not a matter of looking on the bright side of life, dad. This is a matter on where my talents lie, and my talents do not lie here. You don’t even know what I’m good at at school, do you? It’s nothing. I’m good at nothing. I’m a perfectly average student who struggles with everything that comes to you easily.”
Tony stayed silent, baffled, so Peter went on.
“I’m no good in any subject, not even the ones I like. I’m just Peter Stark, the son of a genius who’s a fucking idiot that can’t solve the easiest equation. No, I’ll look at that positively. I’m just not good enough, simple as that.”
He wiped tears of anger from his cheeks. “I’m just so, so done with it all.”
Somewhere along this rant he had stood up, his body facing his father, but his head turned towards the wall to avoid his fathers gaze. Suddenly he felt his fathers strong arms holding his body in a hug. The angle was slightly awkward, but he didn’t let go. And Peter let the months of frustration go by softly letting tears slide onto his dads shoulder and hugging him back.
Pepper joined the hug and rubbed circles on Peter’s back, as if to say that it was all okay and he would be okay as well.
“Next time, next time you come to me and I’ll explain everything in as much detail as is physically possible.” Tony said eventually.
“You didn’t really like that last time.” Peter pointed out.
“I’ll promise I’ll have more patience with you than I had in the past. I had the wrong idea about you, I thought you were just like me when I was younger and couldn’t handle that maybe you were more like your mom after all.”
Peter nodded into his dads shoulder while Pepper squeezed upperarm. They let go of eachother and looked at eachother.
“I’m going to send an email to your school, you will be taking a mental health day tomorrow. Then we can take a look at how to make sure you can thrive at school.” Pepper said.
Peter felt a wave of tiredness hit him, suddenly.
“That sounds great. But first I want to turn in early.”
“Early? Peter it’s half past 12. How long did you even stay up?” Tony asked. Pepper sensed that the boys needed a moment on their own and left to send that email. Peter thought the floor was quite interesting and looked at his socks.
“Add an hour, maybe an hour and a half to now and you’ll have your answer.” Peter said eventually.
“An hour and a half-“ Tony sighed. “I guess you got that from me. Peter, I’m so sorry if I made you feel like you needed to follow my footsteps to the science side. You’ll never have to be anything like me and I’ll still love you.”
Peter shrugged. “It just felt sometimes like I had to be like you. It’s what the media expects, anyway.”
“You don’t have to be a genius for me to love you. Alright? And now off to bed to you, it’s too late for you to be up.
Peter nodded and walked towards his bed.
“Goodnight, Peter.” Tony said as his son made himself comfortable and changed into pyjamas.
“Night, dad.”
---
He fell into a dreamless sleep. Schoolwork long forgotten and the conversation with his father fresh in his mind. How lucky he was with this family.