Chapter Text
When he entered, my smile faltered, withering away like a flower just realizing that summer was long gone. His eyes were sunken, his pupils shrunken. His gaze wandered around the room, finding me. It was then that I realized, he might not make it. ,,Akane, you know, he is not looking his best but I am sure he'll recover soon. It is really crazy how he finds himself in those kinds of situations. He really is a hunting dog that will follow its prey, even though it might kill him in the process. It is not my call to make but I don't think this recklessness is good for his survival. He might not even care about that at all it seems.''
While saying this, he went to the kitchen, simultaneously throwing his ocean blue jacket on the couch right next to it. Not bothering to elaborate any further, he started to cook something for himself, not looking up, not asking anything or opening up about the critical condition that Kougami was supposedly in. He was just as in disarray as I was. I did not know what to do with myself, so I went down to my bureau to finish some last tasks for the day.
~
As I left the bureau of public safety building, I could not help looking back, feeling guilty for leaving though it felt like the only thing I could do. They did not let me inside the health department near Kougami, as if I were a danger to him. Not even Kanaromori let me see if he was at least breathing. It felt like they were intentionally keeping me from seeing him. But why? Why would they do that? Was there something I was not meant to see? Where they still trying to protect me from something, I could easily withstand? I could not get behind it.
The sky had suddenly turned bleak, reminding me of yesterday, when it happened. I could still see him being dragged over the floor and being tossed against the wall like some play-doll. His pained grunts reverberated from the walls of the empty room. Blood pouring from his side where the a gaping stab wound bloomed red.I shuddered at the thought of it. I wanted to forget it but I could not. Still, my Crime Coefficient remained stable. It felt wrong somehow, I was not able to explain why. Should it have changed in the face of those events? For most people, it probably would have but my resilience once again saved me. Kagari would have told me off, he would have called me spoiled for considering this as a problem. I was privileged, I knew that. However, it felt as if I did not really care about the people I know, that I care about. I knew that this was not true but my psychological state was suggesting otherwise. Nevertheless, pitying myself was not going to bring me anywhere.