Chapter Text
Wazukyan stepped back, clapping his hands. “Well? What do you think? This is how some of the big fleet ships we saw back at port sleep their men to save space. Does it seem like it’s worth a shot?”
“What…the hell is that thing?” said Vueko softly, eying the setup. It did not look safe, sturdy, or comfortable.
She was speaking mostly to herself, but of course Wazukyan heard her anyway. “It’s called a hammock. Neat, huh?” He gestured around where they were, one of several ‘rooms’ in the ghanjah’s hold. Canvas sheets hung here and there, giving the vague notion of separate chambers to foster a little peace of mind as people slept.
The ‘rooms’ contained a few sleeping pallets each, but this strange corner hadn’t been able to fit one easily, the ribs of the ship jutting at an inconvenient angle; it was occupied instead by cases of biscuits sitting against the walls and miscellaneous supplies stacked along the floor. Wazukyan had managed to sling his mysterious hammock thing up over the top of all of this with the use of his impressive height. The foreboding contraption swayed back and forth. “You can make them out of rope and almost nothing else, so if we need to use our sleeping pallets for material or something–”
“Sorry, wait, wait, uh — what are you planning to do to our sleeping pallets?!” Vueko liked her sleeping pallet. At least, she felt neutral about it. It was flat. It was sturdy. She trusted it not to dump her onto the floor in the middle of the night during normal, day-to-day boat operations.
She couldn’t say the same about this ‘hammock’. She did not feel neutral about the ‘hammock.’
“Oh, nothing. I’m just saying. Like, if we needed to use them for ship repair materials, or something. Or they got swept overboard.”
“ Swept overb–”
Wazukyan leaned close to her, lowering his voice to a confidential whisper, although nobody else was particularly close to them in the hold. “Besides, Vueko, I’m told they’re great for seasickness.”
Vueko flushed. “...oh.”
Oh.
So this wasn’t just one of Wazukyan’s strange plans, or not only one of his strange plans. No, he was trying to be kind to her, help her make up for being weak. It must be embarrassing for him, that her constitution during the sea leg of their journey had proven so poor. Was he regretting the appointment, maybe? They could have a different sage – Ajapoka was big and strong, maybe it should be him, and Ilui was so clever with words, maybe it should be her–
Wazukyan continued, not appearing to have noticed her plummeting morale. “So,” he said, “I thought Belaf might like one.”
Vueko blinked, her thoughts completely thrown out the porthole.. “...fwheh? Belaf gets seasick?!”
“Oh yeah,” Wazukyan went on. He was still speaking in a confidential, for-your-ears-only sotto voice. “I think he’s a little embarrassed about it. But you should see him heave!”
Vueko caught herself before saying yeah , which would have been an insane thing to say. She wondered at her reaction – an unarticulated thought along the lines of I want him to feel at ease around me, something silly like that – while Wazukyan cocked an eyebrow at her almost as though he had heard. “W…well, oh, he should come to me, maybe I could give him some medicine or something,” she said lamely.
“Ah, well, maybe he will…”
Next, making his crooked arm into a symbol for the swaying belly of a ship and using his other hand to represent the motion of a hammock, Wazukyan demonstrated to her how the contraption – it was actually an elegant mechanism in its simplicity – kept your body lying flat relative to the horizon instead of rolling back and forth with the floor of the ship, although you still felt the vessel’s rise and fall as it rode the waves. That did sound like a benefit – sometimes when the sea was choppy while Vueko was lying down she felt a little like a nudged bottle trying to keep from rolling across a tavern floor. Then he lifted himself onto its surface so that she could see how this was done; somehow he finished in a pose of lackadaisy, with one leg crossed over the other and head pillowed back on folded arms. He made it look easy, even…comfortable?
“Anyway,” he finished, climbing back out, “I’m going to leave this one here now that it’s up. Might try to string up another few if I can find space.. I’ll let Belaf know. He can take a nap in one sometime when he doesn’t have any work. So can you!”
She felt herself turn red. He didn’t mean at the same time he didn’t mean at the SAME TIME what is WRONG WITH YOU VUEKO –
Wazukyan winked and patted her on the shoulder. “Just keep it in mind. I’m going to go rustle up some grubs. I mean, grub.” He strolled off with his hands on his hips, whistling. Vueko was almost distracted enough to not parse the comment about grubs, quite against her will.
A few days passed.
There came an afternoon of rough swells, the ship traveling up and down over hills of seawater, rolling all the way. At her wit’s end, disgusted at the thought of climbing up to the rainy deck to hurl over the side while sea winds blew her sick back into her own face or some similar undignified thing, Vueko found herself down in the hold, eyeing the ‘hammock’ again.
Well, everyone else was busy or resting in their pallets. If she failed to get into it correctly and fell on her ass, at least nobody would see her. She huffed, lifting one leg into the hammock. The woven plane of it began to tilt towards her, threatening to go upside down and drop her on the floor. Vueko yelped and quickly lunged forward, grabbed on with both hands, hurling herself stomach first onto its surface, hoping that becoming horizontal as soon as possible would forestall disaster.
And against all odds, this…worked?
Awkwardly, one foot still hanging in the air, Vueko wriggled forward like a caterpillar. She slowly pulled her foot back towards her body, ended up curled in the middle like a weird frog or a loaf of bread.
Cautiously, she stretched her limbs back out once the hammock was still, trying to emulate Wazukyan’s easy posture. It…wasn’t half bad. Yes, just like her compass, the hammock rotated on the axis of a larger gravity not beholden to the orientation of the boat itself. She could still feel the climb and fall of the ghanjah over each watery mountain, but the rolling motion of the deck to the left and right now mercifully passed her by. It was disorienting to see the walls and floor pitch around her, seemingly independent of her own sense of gravity. Once she closed her eyes, though, the comfort level was definitely an improvement over rolling on her pallet or crouching miserably on deck.
In fact, once she closed her eyes, she eventually fell asleep.
Someone murmured quietly, in the dark:
“Vueroeruko…?”
She started awake from her peaceful rest to find this corner of the ship’s belly all in shadow. Her lamp had run out of fuel — when had that happened? – but it was alright, because Belaf had brought another one with him.
Wait, Belaf was here?
Vueko yelped, snorted herself back to full alertness, frantically wiped a little drool off her chin and registered that he was right next to her, peering at her curiously in the lantern light. She tried to turn to face him, did so a little too quickly.
The hammock obligingly dumped her in a heap on the floor at his feet. ‘Fuheh,’ she said miserably.
“Vueroeruko! Are you alright?” Belaf knelt down next to her, concern written all over his peculiar and lovely features. “Ah, I told Wazukyan that thing didn’t look safe –”
Vueko felt a rush of shame. “No no no it’s great, it’s just me I messed up–” Abruptly she hushed her voice, aware others must be lying in the dark of the hold around them. He gently helped her to her feet with the hand that wasn’t holding a lantern. Her fingertips brushed against the hard edge of his bracers as she took his hand; in contrast to the protective material, his palm felt quite soft and warm…
Vueko yanked her thoughts away from what Belaf’s skin felt like. “--um, it was good actually, I was having a nice sleep. I just fell out. By mistake.”
“Ah, I see. I’m glad you seem to be alright.” Vueko dusted the seat of her pants off, one cheek and then the other, then immediately blushed, hoping he hadn’t seen that. But Belaf had moved on to inspecting the hammock. “This thing…it does not look sturdy.”
“Did Wazukyan show you how to use it? He showed me when he put it up. It wasn’t that hard. Ah, actually I think you’d have a much easier time of it than me…” Belaf was always poised, always graceful, as far as Vueko could tell.
Always graceful except his apparent tendency towards seasickness.
In fact… “Um, Belaf, why did you come down here?”
He looked at her, and astonishingly now he seemed a little sheepish, but he explained nonetheless. “Well. Wazukyan told me that this thing was good for…that it might, uh, help to settle my stomach. I don’t do well sometimes, in this kind of weather.” He smiled wryly, looking a little nauseous at the same time.
She remembered a few days ago, feeling a little put out that perhaps he didn’t feel comfortable enough with her to speak to her about it, wishing for that sign of trust, that intimacy. But there was a whole new feeling coming over her, now.
She was suddenly feeling oddly protective. Wanted to help him, because he clearly did trust her, didn’t care to hide an undignified truth from her, would let her see him as he was…”Well, don’t worry about it. I can get on it and show you, then get back off –”
“Oh, are you done resting? I had no intention of disturbing your sleep, you can get back in and stay there–”
“I’m feeling perfectly refreshed, actually!” She was. No queasiness, either. On the other hand Belaf was looking a little worse for the wear, now that she got a good look at his face. (Not that she ever remembered getting a bad look at his face.)
“Then even so, no need to start climbing all over it again on my account. I don’t want you to fall again and get hurt.” He said it with such earnest concern that it was impossible to feel slighted or underestimated, as she suspected she would have were Wazukyan to say the same thing.
It wasn’t that Wazukyan would even have been more likely to mean it in such a way. It was merely that that was how she knew she would have taken it, because, well, why wouldn’t she? Vueko generally felt she was the kind of person people should talk down to, and so she believed they were doing so… But Belaf was just so damn sincere .
“How about you tell me how to do it instead?” He set the lantern down on the floor. “Where to put my hands, and all. If you’re not sure, just tell me to stop if it looks wrong? Or grab me.”
He turned around and started studying the hammock with his arms folded while Vueko’s mind tripped over his last sentence repeatedly. “Uh–...uh, ok–sure, g-grab you–”
“So, should I sit down on this flat surface?” He experimentally turned around and sat, quite primly, on the edge of the hammock, causing it to sink close to the floor. It listed backwards, but didn’t dump Belaf out. “Ah, now what? Maybe I can lean back and then swing my legs in–”
“Um,” said Vueko. “Wazukyan went into it kind of like he was crawling inside a bed roll?” Belaf’s way sounded like it should work, but Wazukyan’s way was the right one, wasn’t it?
Hmm. Vueko suddenly felt unsure that Wazukyan’s hammock mounting method was any more the default among hammock users than his dietary choices at sea were the default among sailors.
Too late. “I should turn around, then?” said Belaf, sounding uncertain, and started to shift his weight – the contraption rolled without warning. He quickly clutched at the rope, crying out.
Poor Belaf , Vueko thought, feeling a pang of fondness so strong it almost hurt. And she was tempted…she was ever so tempted…
Well. Why not? He had said it was alright…
She gave in to the temptation. “Here, let me help you,” said Vueko, and leaned in behind him, threading one arm around his narrow waist in order to hold his left hand with hers.
Her interference stopped the motion of the hammock. At the very edge of her hearing Belaf made a surprised little inhale at the contact but made no move to pull away.
She softly adjusted her grip on the back of his hand, feeling a little sprout of warmth bloom in her chest. Such a small thing, but it…it felt so good to touch him.
The hammock gained several points in her esteem.
“Try gripping here,” she said. Holding the back of his hand gently, she moved it to a spot that seemed to make sense. Probably. She was not paying that much attention to the correct way to get into a hammock any more. She could feel the slight heat of Belaf’s hand around the very edges of his wrist guard. His hands were a little bigger than hers, but their palms were of comparable size – the difference was in Belaf’s long, graceful fingers. She noticed they were paler than hers, had known this already but not often had the opportunity to see what their skin looked like side by side.
Vueko felt gluttonous, incredibly self indulgent. Maybe it was ridiculous of her – delusional – entitled, to think she could share his space like this. But at this moment, she couldn’t bring herself to care.
“Ah. Okay,” Belaf said quietly. “And I’ll put my other hand…”
She grabbed that one too. He made another small sound of surprise.
Her arms both around him now, she dared to press herself a little closer to his back. Her layers of loose clothing, his warm thick cloak, all this not-insignificant quantity of cloth and textile that was bunched up between her chest and his back…it felt like just barely enough to make the position decent.
Greedy. So greedy of me. But she couldn’t stop.
She tried to peek over his shoulder, pressing close in the process. The light from the lantern set on the floor was bright but not directly thrown n their direction, so she had to be close to see where she put his hands. That was only logical, after all.
“Ah—…Vueroeruko..”
This close she could just discern the scent of his skin, a pleasant, warm smell that felt somehow like home. That was interesting. Didn’t the two of them lack a true home? Wasn’t that what all of this was about? Yet in the moment, this closeness felt like something in the same vein, a space she belonged in...
It was Belaf’s left ear, the one covered in scarring, that she was nearer to; she knew his hearing wasn’t as strong in that one. So she leaned a little closer to it. Purely for practicality. She could feel how close her lips were to brushing the tip of his ear, but surely she couldn’t do that… right? “Alright,” she said quietly. She felt him startle and was obscurely satisfied. “Now, what you should do next is…take one step up, when you can, and…”
Distantly, the medic part of her brain noted that his breathing sounded a little ragged. “Um. One step up. Right.” Vueko wondered if he could feel her own exhalations tickling his ear. He lifted one leg and the motion brought his lower torso into contact with hers. “Ah. Sorry, Vueroeruko.”
“It’s alright,” said Vueko. It was more than alright. “Now, you can go ahead and crawl in, and then try to stay flat and you won’t fall out.”
Obliging her, he did so – the closeness of their bodies ending in the process. She felt a keen disappointment as his warmth pulled away from her… “Um. Okay. Should I stay on my stomach?”
“No, I think you’ll be more comfortable if you turn over. Let me help you take off your cloak…ah, maybe you should have done that first…” So that there would have been one less layer in the way… Vueko caught the thought forming and could barely believe the boldness of it, felt herself blushing a little in the dark.
Oblivious to this, Belaf unclasped his cloak and shifted nimbly from side to side to remove it as he rolled over, a maneuver Vueko probably would have been thrown out of the hammock by. She felt vaguely regretful that he had been too fast to need her ‘help’ taking it off. He handed the garment over to her with a muttered expression of gratitude, and she exchanged it for a light blanket that had been folded nearby, which she draped over him once he had taken off his bracers and belts and dropped them on the floor. “Oh, you don’t have that thing you like to tie on your head when you sleep…”
“I’ll be alright going without. Dawn is soon and this is more of a nap than anything, so I don’t wish to get up and fetch it. Although I’m gratified knowing you’d be here to help me get into this thing again if I had to.” That made Vueko smile as she pulled the sheet up to his chin.
And as she did so she noticed: it was a large hammock, wasn’t it? Wazukyan, something of a tall man, had been comfortable spreading his limbs out. And she herself wasn’t tall or large, and Belaf was pleasantly medium-sized….so maybe…
Was there enough room in there for…?
“Um…Belaf, uh…”
He gazed at her quizically, the lantern placing a little point of light in each of his eyes in the dark. “Yes, Vueroeruko? What is it?”
“C….Could–”
Just then, the ship made its way over a particularly large swell. She watched Belaf wince briefly, looking ill again.
“I hope this thing does help,” he said to himself quietly, with a grimace, and that put an end to her silly, greedy fantasy of asking to crawl in with him.
He didn’t feel well , he needed to rest in that thing, not have her in there…doing whatever she would have done. Rolling into him, maybe kicking him, almost certainly drooling on him…
Yes, she couldn’t take any more of his time or energy right now – in fact, now that her inexplicable earlier giddiness was subsiding, Vueko found herself wondering what she had even been thinking. Why had she been pawing at him while ostensibly doing him a favor? That wasn’t okay, was it?
“Alright. So…ah, you’re absolutely sure you’ve had your fill of using the hammock for tonight…?” said Belaf.
“Yes, I won’t displace you, it’s yours for the night,” Vueko muttered, feeling herself blush again at the ridiculous idea of crawling into it next to him, which was surely the farthest thing from his own mind when he asked if she wanted it back. What had she been thinking? “I…you should go to sleep, get some soothing rest.” She gathered up his cloak to her. It smelled like him. “I’ll give this back to you in the morning. Sleep now.”
He looked a little put out by something, though she couldn’t imagine what. “...yes, I will. And thank you again for the help.”
The small smile he gave her then, in the dark, made her feel better immediately.
He didn’t mind – had appreciated the help. So…so maybe she didn’t need to feel guilty. But surely at this time, it was the considerate thing to do to let him rest.
“Goodnight, Belaf,” she said softly, and left, taking his lantern with her.
And once she had got a little distance away, in the dark, amidst slumbering forms and soft shadows with nobody watching, she quietly stopped and draped his cloak over her shoulders. It was still warm.
END Ch. 1