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"Dolohov. Come to Malfoy Manor immediately. There is a creature--your assistance is needed. We'll be waiting in the library."
Antonin stared perplexed as the misty doe faded away, accompanied by a faint screeching sound.
What could possibly--.
Well. If Severus was summoning him, he must really be desperate.
Heaving himself off the couch, Antonin shuffled out of his tapochki and into his boots. Grabbing his wand, he stepped into the floo, only to step back out into complete chaos.
The typically ornate and pristine greeting room at the Manor was, in a word, a disaster. The marble floor was covered in a suspicious purple goo; the heavy and drawn velvet drapes were smoldering in multiple places. Most of the ceiling was covered with a giant scorch mark; and three different vases were toppled off of their perches, shattered and strewn across the floor. A silenced painting was soundlessly screeching in its frame, its gilded frame hanging at an odd angle off the wall. The room also, strangely, smelled like burnt fir trees.
Hearing a commotion from further into the house, Antonin gingerly stepped over the mess and headed towards the library.
Walking through the dark and winding halls, Antonin started to get a...feeling. The kind of unease that his finely tuned instincts urged him to never ignore. Peeking over his shoulder and picking up the pace, he finally reached the library doors, lightly vibrating with some surprisingly dark wards.
Releasing them easily, he slowly pushed the door open calling, "Severus?"
"Dolohov. Took you long enough. Get in here quickly and put the wards back up behind you."
"Yes Severus, I'm doing very well, thank you. Was enjoying a nice cozy evening in front of the fire with my book before you so rudely demanded I make my appearance. So good of me to come. Yes, I would like a refreshment, thank you," Antonin grumbled to himself, re-raising the wards and stepping further into the room.
Antonin headed towards the stacks, and turned a corner to find a dour and unusually rumpled Severus sitting in a gilded armchair, surprisingly covered by a pack of small children.
Gregory was holding onto his left pants leg, aggressively sucking on a candy cane. Pansy was clutching his right with her full body, sniffling and looking teary-eyed. Theodore sat on his lap, busying himself with lightly running his hand up and down the professor's long row of frock buttons. And Severus appeared to be wearing Draco as a new scarf, when one considered how closely the child had himself wrapped around his neck, with an absolutely petrified expression on his face.
"Severus. Having an enjoyable time babysitting this evening?"
Severus glowered, "Dolohov. Shut up."
"I am shocked that you even agreed to this? Where is everybody else?"
"The ministry Yule Ball is tonight. Cissa begged me, "Severus, we must make haste on rebuilding our reputation in society." And evidently Draco is going through a phase where he is petrified of House Elves, he screams his head off any time one even so much as looks in his direction.
Apparently this is a "common developmental affliction for his age bracket. A sign of his ability to distinguish amongst the hierarchical nature of magical beings."
She also informed me that child minding is a standard and appropriate "Godfatherly duty."
Antonin raised one eyebrow, as if to say, that can't be all.
"She also promised...a first edition of a Hungarian potions text I have been searching for for ages. Then evidently word got out that I'd be here with Draco, and the next thing I knew all the children were dropped off with promises that they'd go to bed right away.
I was told my responsibilities would be light refreshments, followed by a brief reading of bedtime stories, and then the rest of the time I'd have to myself to relax. I NEVER IMAGINED THESE HELLIONS," glaring down at the group, causing all four of them to wince in unison, "would manage to--"
Interrupting the summation of his rant was an enormous crash against the library doors, followed by an in-human howling and scraping noise.
Antonin whipped his head around towards the door, "Severus. What IS that?"
"That would be the part I was about to get to. I turned my back for ONE MOMENT to assemble their hot cocoa, and they summoned a demon!"
"A demon?"
"Yes. Specifically a Krampus, I think. So. Can you get rid of it?"
"Let me make sure I'm understanding correctly. You were bribed into babysitting tonight, the children collectively summoned a demon, and to deal with this...you thought of me?"
"Well--the myriad of mythical creatures in Russian folklore are well known. Surely you must have some inkling on how to approach such a problem. It's not as if I could've asked Roddy--despite his bizarre fascination with creatures and beings, he's still on house arrest. And I knew a curmudgeonly shut-in like yourself wouldn't be caught dead at the Ball.
Besides I've had my hands full trying to keep these screaming miscreants safe and secure. THAT BLASTED THING chased us all about the first floor. In between trying to get us safely barricaded in here, and managing all of their frightful accidental magic, I could hardly manage to dispatch it at the same time. Cissa will murder me if I 'traumatize the children any further,'" he ended, with a long suffering sigh.
"Despite this being their own fault," he muttered.
Antonin sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. Choosing to ignore the dig at this social life---so what if he was a homebody? Home was cozy, filled with books and snacks, and nary a stupid person in sight.
Despite what people may presume about his heritage-- magical, let alone demonic, beings were not his specialty. On the bright side, he was confident that as a curse breaker his wards would hold while he utilized the library to investigate what to do here.
"Fine, I will figure this out. Just... stay there and I will take a look around and see what information I can find."
"Oh yes, because I am so mobile with these barnacles" Snape mumbled, shifting in the chair.
Rolling his eyes, Antonin moved further into the library. Reaching the section on Yule folklore, he pulled a heavy red tomb off the shelf. Flipping through, he finally found a page titled KRAMPUS.
Perhaps the most feared creature of Yuletide lore! Half-goat, half-demon, he is hairy with cloven hooves and horns. His long, pointed tongue lolls out, and he has fangs. Carrying a bundle of birch branches to swat at humans, he punishes naughty children, known for stuffing them into his never-ending knapsack and taking them to his lair for consumption. Krampus is drawn in by mischievous innocent souls, gingerbread, and magical households. Excited by the chase, he can be repelled from the home by a sufficient offering of schnapps.
"So I get to play bartender to a demonic entity, lovely." Slamming the book shut, he put it back on the shelf and walked back to where Severus was reclining.
"Severus, does Lucius still have a bar in here? Evidently the only thing standing between us and dispelling this thing is a good bottle of schnapps"
"You must be joking"
"Indeed I am not.
"There usually is a cart off to the right side of the room, next to the bust of Armand III. If it doesn't have any schnapps, we'll have to summon one of the elves"
Draco is displeased with this potential turn of events. "NOoOOO SEVVUS. NO ELVIES."
"Hush Draco. We wouldn't have need of them if you hadn't gotten us into this mess in the first place".
Draco sniffled, but evidently had already learned at his tender age that his Godfather was not to be trifled with.
Rummaging around the eye-wateringly expensive collection, Antonin pulled out an unopened bottle of Berentzen Plum Schnapps.
"I've found a bottle. I'll do the handoff...keep an eye out in case you need to curse something?"
Hearing Severus' grumble of assent, Antonin lowered the wards and opened one side of the library doors.
Sticking his head into the hall he shouted, "KRAMPUS! Come out, come out. I've got a nice bottle of fruity schnapps for you!"
Silence initially greeted his announcement, followed by the rapid clip-clop of hooves.
The Krampus appeared from the shadows, every bit as unfortunate looking as the book advised. His large, golden goat-eyes blinked disconcertingly in the darkness.
Antonin stuck his arm into the hall, and waved the bottle enticingly.
"This is a brand new bottle of plum schnapps. All for you, if you promise to leave and never return to this home,"
The Krampus cocked its head to the right, as if considering this offer. It appeared to be trying to peek into the library behind Antonin.
"There's nothing in there for you. This is the best offer you're going to get. If you don't take this gift and leave of your own good will, I will have to resort to...less savory methods." He punctuated this statement with a pointed stare.
The Krampus, evidently big on fruity alcohol and/or self preservation, merely stepped closer to Antonin, plucked the schnapps from his hand, slipped it into his knapsack and disappeared in a poof of pine needles.
Well, that was easier than expected.
"Severus, it's gone. So if that's all I think I'll--"
"Don't you dare even think about leaving me. You are completely delusional if you think I am enduring another moment of the remainder of this evening without suitable backup. Grab a child or two, we're going to the kitchen for cookies and then heading upstairs to put everyone in bed."
Knowing the temptation of being fireside with a novel did not outweigh the certainty of what, should he turn him down, Snape holding a grudge against him would entail-- Antonin merely bent down to pick up Pansy, and held his other hand out for Greg to grab onto.
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Once the children were all tucked into bed and slumbering, following a combination of threats "under no circumstances are you to summon anything ever again", assurances "no Draco, no elves are coming to get you", and bribes "yes, you can have hot cocoa again tomorrow,"
Antonin and Severus finally settled back into the library in front of the fire, each with a glass of firewhisky.
"Morgana help me," Severus groaned, tilting his head back towards the ceiling. "And I thought the kids at school were terrible,"
"You were admittedly quite outnumbered. Which of them do you think was truly responsible for it?"
"Theodore requested the offending book in the first place, but frankly my suspicions rest on Draco--"
Before Severus had a chance to continue, Lucius' shriek of horror sounded from across the house "WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME HAPPENED IN HERE? MY MING VASE!"
"Ah, looks like Lucius and Narcissa are home"
Knocking back the remainder of his whisky Severus grumbled, "I am never babysitting again."