Archive of Our Own

Early on in college, Tanjirou realized you’re forced to face the consequences of decisions made out of petty spite. Shit doesn’t go away on its own. So he wasn’t prepared for Kyoujurou to hunt him down and foil the plan to lick his wounds for the rest of the week.

Kyoujurou had gone on a ‘date’ the night before and it hadn't been the sufficient twenty-four hours Tanjirou needed to sulk and talk himself out of the silent treatment Kyoujurou didn’t know he was on the receiving end of.

Instead, the very person he’d been avoiding crowded his doorframe. Bright, boisterous, and ignorant of Tanjirou’s inner struggles. He hated him a little for it.

“Hey!” Kyoujurou said. His voice echoed down the narrow hall and there was no time to check if people were watching when Kyoujurou pulled into him a hug, nuzzling into Tanjirou’s neck like an abandoned golden retriever.

No.

Kyoujurou didn’t get to show up here like they were cool. Tanjirou was pissed, the feelings he wasn’t supposed to have were hurt and fine, he’ll push him away in a minute. 

“Why weren’t you at the library?”

Of course.

Zenitsu and Inosuke hadn’t been listening when he mumbled about a headache before skulking off. Tanjirou’s downward spiral cut their study session short when he broke the fuck buddy code and looked at Kyoujurou’s Instagram story.

It had been unassuming at first but the two boba drinks, the ample chest bursting out of a low-cut floral dress in the background, and the colorful hair had been enough evidence. Enough to have made him look down at his stained sweatshirt, his overall lack of anything soft and appealing, and for insecurities to rush to the surface.

When Kyoujurou texted an hour before he was supposed to come over saying he was grabbing food with a friend, apologizing profusely, and promising to call Tanjirou later, it took precisely twelve minutes to formulate a reply.

Who? Can’t you come after? typed out desperately and deleted. It was none of his business, he wasn’t owed an explanation. But all the reasons why Kyoujurou would straight up cancel and not offer to see him later buzzed around his head. He’d been so anxious but he’d still offered a casual, chill, “Cool, np,” despite the sinking feeling in his gut.

And he’d ignored his phone, attempting to poorly distract himself with a too-hollow stomach and eyes that burned. But he’d eat drywall before he admitted he was jealous.

They’d been doing whatever this was for two months, they had a routine and it was fine.

Weak for affection, he leaned into the hug and inhaled faded cologne, wondering if Kyoujurou wore this scent last night, if he tied his hair up in the same half bun Tanjirou liked.

“I wasn’t feeling well,” he mumbled and pushed his face closer into the dark red hoodie. It was soft, the fluffy University letters a pillow for his cheek.

A hulking, perpetual furnace. Warm and solid.

Stop it. He's not yours.

How do you not become attached to someone like Kyoujurou: well-liked, intelligent, abysmal social cues, oblivious but no less remarkable?

Sunshine, campus golden-boy dimmed only when they’re skin to skin, warm-bodied, panting breaths in each other’s mouths. Rolling around on space-themed bed sheets because it never occurred to Tanjirou to upgrade to something more mature when he left home.

So he got used to tucking away the yearning, the need for this to be more, to mean more when Kyoujurou stroked his hair softly. But it was hard not to misinterpret intentions when he pressed kisses to Tanjirou’s temple, behaviors Tanjirou equated to actual relationships. He romanticized everything but self-preservation forced him to keep it to himself.

“What about now? Was it a fever?” Kyoujurou pulled back to rest a palm on Tanjirou’s forehead. He looked so concerned and if Tanjirou hadn't been so pissed at the world, he’d have felt a little guilty. “You’re warm, actually, I can go to the cafeteria for soup...”

Kyoujurou hadn’t come to play nurse. It was obvious what he wanted but Tanjirou was desperate enough to maintain the pretense. It felt good to be fussed over, no one ever did except his mom and Nezuko, both whom were miles away so he basked in it. The worry was not just limited to Kyoujurou's rough treatment that left bruises on Tanjirou’s skin.

“No, thank you. I’m okay,” Tanjirou said, staring down at the cheap carpet. “I think I ate bad leftovers or something.”

Risking a glance, Kyoujurou’s eyes were assessing, and disbelieving but it was the softness that reassured him. The look he usually got before Kyoujurou ruffled his hair and acted like Tanjirou was someone to be fond of.

“Alright.” And that was that.

Kyoujurou released him abruptly and strode by. Tanjirou turned to watch muscles flex even beneath the thick hoodie and sighed with longing.

Really, there was only so much someone can take. Everything made him want and want. He kicked the hopefulness that reared its head back into its box of delusions, more relieved he didn’t kill the mood.

Kyoujurou can go on all the dates he wants (no, no no, he really can’t).

If he came to anyone with this, they’d tell him to man up and have some pride. But self-worth doesn’t come into play when you agree to no strings attached and you’re the only one hopelessly infatuated. He’s a sad little puppet, anyway, all thin strings and loose limbs.

Tanjirou stood there, awkward in his own room. Flopping onto the small bed, Kyoujurou rifled through notebooks and laid out on those embarrassing ass sheets. He resented them and it was stupid.

Kyoujurou had to find it juvenile, even amusing when he had Tanjirou face down, drooling, and moaning into cartoon moons and stars. Maybe Kyoujurou won’t ever take him seriously. Anyone would be naïve (pathetic) enough to be led along, eyes wide and wanting, comfortable with scraps and lingering touches.

“What–what are you doing?” he asked, a little dumb. Kyoujurou just laughed and cleared off the books.

“I thought we could watch a movie.” He pulled Tanjirou’s laptop close and looked up expectantly. It should be surprising how easily he moved about and touched things, so comfortable in Tanjirou’s space, like it was his place, too. “If you want to? Or we can do something else. Order pizza, maybe. I have practice in the morning so I could use the calories!”

Maybe having a routine was more detrimental to Tanjirou’s state of mind than he thought because it was hard to comprehend what was happening.

Kyoujurou never hung out.

He had football, tutored, and did volunteer work off-campus. There were only two days and certain hours allotted for Tanjirou and today wasn’t supposed to have room for either.

“Oh…I–thought you’d want to…okay, a movie sounds good.”

“Unless you had plans?”

Even if he did, he'd cancel them anyway for Kyoujurou. Damnit.

“Nope.”

“Okay…come here then, we’ll order food in a bit.”

The way Kyoujurou commanded so casually and the effect it had on him should be scary. But he went, slowly, because he wasn’t that eager. He wasn’t.

Shuffling on his knees onto the bed, he was uncertain where to go until Kyoujurou gave up waiting and manhandled him into the little spoon.

Don’t get used to it.

Kyoujurou situated them so Tanjirou’s head rested on his bicep. This was so unlike the other times and Kyoujurou may just be feeling guilty. Yeah okay, that stung but Tanjirou brushed it aside, stomach souring.

“Comfortable?”

Tanjirou nodded, eyes locked onto the screen like it’ll distract from the way Kyoujurou’s curled over him. His phone lit up with multiple messages and Tanjirou jealously wondered if they were from boob girl.

Whatever.

Every distraction always earned Kyoujurou’s full focus and it was the most adorable but equally as exasperating aspect of his personality. Kyoujurou grinned at the screen and turned the phone to the side.

Was he looking at nudes?

Tanjirou fumed, opened Netflix, and banged on the keys with purpose. He picked some new action movie, not caring which.

“Ready?” he asked, waspish. 

“Yes, sorry!” Kyoujurou said, putting notifications on vibrate. “There’s a singles party this weekend at the house.” Tanjirou felt his heart immediately plummet as it always did at the mention of single and Kyoujurou in the same breath. “Sanemi lost a bet to Giyu and he’s got to dress like a shot girl.”

Tanjirou almost rolled his eyes, not in the mood to pretend to find stupidity funny. “I’m surprised he even agreed to that.”

“No idea how he let himself get caught up in a bet with that kid. He’s ruthless.”

“It’s always the quiet ones,” Tanjirou offered for lack of anything else.

He didn’t know why he was being told this. Kyoujurou rarely talked about his friends and their events and had never felt the need to. Another reminder of where Tanjirou fell on the importance meter.

So of all things to be told about, a singles party he wasn’t even invited to was just a punch in the gut.

“Do you have to go?” He winced but Kyoujurou just scrunched his nose distastefully.

“They trash the house when I don’t.”

Tanjirou deflated. “Oh…I see.” And then, more casual- “Is there a list?”

“Tengen’s girls are taking care of that. There’s enough guys on the team to make it even,” Kyoujurou waved his hand.

Probably noticing Tanjirou’s silence, he tilted his head. “Did you want to go?”

Tanjirou snapped without thinking, “I don’t invite myself to places.”

Kyoujurou looked surprised enough for Tanjirou to keep his face averted, wishing they would watch the damn movie already because this conversation was meaningless.

“Oh…well, I mean it’s always been an upperclassmen thing, so I–”

The backtracking was just making it worse.

“It’s cool, really, I have to study anyway.”

“Right, yeah.” After a strained pause, Kyoujurou looked at the laptop and perked up. “Oh, I heard about this one, it should be good.”

“Yep,” Tanjirou said.

Kyoujurou can’t read the room because the only way the guy knew how to diffuse awkwardness was to cuddle even closer. And Relationship 101, you didn’t gloss over things with intimacy. But Tanjirou was letting it happen so who was the real jackass here?

Considering this weekend’s plans, Tanjirou wondered if now would be the time to put on some moves. But the vibes Kyoujurou had been giving off were strictly hanging out and chill. He didn’t know how to feel about that, yet.

An hour into the movie, the main lead and his love interest were getting it on in a warehouse. Panting and grunts on the screen took him back to his eight-year-old self that always faked leaving the room if his parents were watching, too.

He was hyper-aware of Kyoujurou’s breath against his ear, the heavy arm hung loosely over his waist, and the fingers that idly stroked his hair. No idea when that started and Tanjirou didn’t realize he was pushing back until a hand gripped his hip.

Breathing suspended to anticipate the next move.

“Something wrong?” Kyoujurou asked, leaning closer.

Tanjirou shook his head. The couple was still going, sharp slaps of skin echoing from the speakers and he wanted to fast forward. It wasn't even that arousing but the guy grabbed the girl’s breast, leaned down to tongue her nipple, and his cock twitched because it’s something Kyoujurou always liked to do.

To bite and suck and litter marks all over his chest. Tanjirou inconspicuously tried to draw his hand down to cover his chub. Of course, he’d ruin this with his lizard brain. Kyoujurou wanted to watch a movie and Tanjirou was getting horny off vanilla, hetero sex.

“She sounds like you.”

“W-what?” Tanjirou blinked rapidly at the breathy sighs and the high-pitched whimpers. “She does not.”

Kyoujurou laughed, deep and low. “Does, too,” he said, tightening his arm to press a palm against Tanjirou’s stomach.

He inhaled sharply when Kyoujurou dipped down to breathe into his neck. The area tickled, sending heat straight to his belly.

“The noises you make, your little moans when I touch you, they’re so cute. Though, you sound better.” Kyoujurou kissed his cheek softly. It was too affectionate. Tanjirou ached. “You’re prettier, too.”

He ducked his head and squirmed when he felt hardness pressed against his back. Kyoujurou tensed, too, but didn't make room, instead pushed himself closer. Slow, suggestive.

Compliments were overwhelming when Kyoujurou gave them, earnest and true like Tanjirou was lovely and should believe it.

Like it’s Kyoujurou who’s lucky and not the other way around.

“I don’t sound like a girl,” Tanjirou huffed, cheeks heating.

How they can even talk about this so casually was mortifying.

Kyoujurou’s hand caressed Tanjirou’s stomach over his shirt, lightly playing with the hem, with white-hot fingertips.

“It’s okay that you do,” he murmured, ghosting over a nipple. Tanjirou jerked but was caged in. “I like it.”

It always clicked for him when Kyoujurou turned a little mean. When he didn’t give Tanjirou a choice except to get used to that unfailing politeness morphing into something much deeper that hit all the parts of Tanjirou he didn’t know he had.

The love scene was long over but Kyoujurou had worked himself up. It’s sensory overload- the gentle touches, the not-so-subtle way Kyoujurou rubbed his own erection against the swell of Tanjirou’s ass.

Testing the waters, he pushed his hips back and was pleased when Kyoujurou’s voice turned gritty.

“I said I wouldn’t start anything because you weren’t feeling well. But you’re making it hard to be nice.”

Tanjirou’s entire insides twisted and coiled faster than logic could keep up and he thought, finally, finally. 

It’s what they do best, it’s what he understood. Kyoujurou already lit the match and tapped into that sick part of his brain that liked being taken down. He already felt like he was out of his body, and gave it over easily.

“You don’t have to be…” the words tumbled out. Kyoujurou’s so big against him, so hard. The front of his sweatpants was damp because Kyoujurou never bothered wearing underwear when he came over to fuck. Tanjirou moved shamelessly. “You can do whatever…I want it, told you I’m fine.”

“What do I look like taking advantage of you when you’re sick?” Kyoujurou hummed, all mirth, and massaged soothing circles on Tanjirou’s thigh.

It’s distracting enough to throw him off and out himself. “I wasn’t sick!”

The caresses stopped, and horny anticipation was replaced with a wave of anxiety.

“Ah, so you lied.”

“I-I…” Tanjirou stuttered helplessly, frustration mounting.

“Why? Were you that angry I canceled on you? I let you know as soon as I could!” Kyoujurou asked, genuinely curious, and rested his chin on Tanjirou’s shoulder. Breath warm against his cheek and the touching resumed.

Tanjirou shook his head. Another lie but his heart was in his stomach and this conversation would lead to confessions he wasn’t prepared for yet.

“I know….and I appreciated that. Don’t worry about it.” His voice cracked and he cursed himself for that, too.

“Are you sure it’s cool? You’ve been in a shit mood since I got here.”

But why do you care?

“I don’t know, Kyoujurou,” he said, lips thinning. “Why would I be mad you ditched me for a–”

Only at the moment, it looked like his ire was coming from nowhere instead of being months of pent-up frustration and hurt that Kyoujurou had no idea about.

He was never this petty, always the most understanding or so people have told him. But it’s that part of his nature that led him to the point where he allowed the one he wanted the most to use and dispose of him.

It made his chest hurt, and his eyes sting.

Any attempt to peel himself away was stopped when strong arms held him tight. This would’ve been fine in any other situation but he’d already made a fool of himself.

So if he could go to sleep and have time turned back a few months, that would be great.

“Don’t leave in the middle of a conversation,” Kyoujurou said into his ear. Tanjirou shivered, not too deep in self-loathing for it to feel good. “Such bad manners.”

“It’s fine,” Tanjirou whined, not even bothering to sound upbeat. “I’m tired actually, I should probably get some sleep. Sorry, we didn’t get to finish the movie.”

But Kyoujurou refused to let him go.

“We’re not done talking,” and Kyoujurou used that tone that had the perverse part of Tanjirou’s brain perking up.

It’s not fair, it’s cheating. Kyoujurou got away with everything.

“You won’t tell me what I did but you’re mad. So calm down a little.”

And before Tanjirou could grab his wrist, Kyoujurou's hand came around to cup the back of Tanjirou’s neck to squeeze and massage. Everything went offline and he pressed further into the touch, almost automatic how quickly he went limp.

“Good,” Kyoujurou whispered. “Just relax. So are you going to have an attitude all night?”

Kyoujurou’s hands were big, big enough that his neck fit perfectly in that firm grip. The other hand traveled slowly down to brush over the front of his pants. Sensory overload, Kyoujurou knew what he was doing. Distractions were his specialty.

“This is how you wanna start a serious conversation?” Tanjirou hiss whispers despite the tingle down to his toes. “With your hand near my di–my privates?”

He could feel Kyoujurou's smile against his temple. “It got your attention, didn’t it?”

Tanjirou nudged him with his elbow and was blocked by hard abs. He couldn’t even feel the satisfaction of doling out abuse.

“Yeah, but now I just wanna do it.” A pinch on his thigh startled him. “What-–”

“This is my fault,” Kyoujurou said, rubbing his face back and forth against Tanjirou’s back. “My innocent, cute little Tanjirou, gone. Now he has a dirty mouth and hits me.”

“Don’t grope me if you’re not trying to get me in the mood.”

Kyoujurou lifted his head to smirk, wild blonde and red streaks fell messily out of his bun to frame his face. Tanjirou’s chest contracted and expanded. Christ, he was so hot.

“I’m always trying to get you in the mood,” Kyoujurou wiggled his thick brows cheekily and pushed his face closer.

“Perv.”

“So abusive.”

But this, this he can settle into and Tanjirou tucked himself closer against that broad body, eyes closing when Kyoujurou palmed his ass.

“We still need to talk,” Kyoujurou rumbled against his head.

Tanjirou dragged his nose across Kyoujurou’s neck. “Does the order matter?”

Low exhale. “No…no, whenever you want.”

Yeah good, if he played it right they’d pass out and Tanjirou could fake like he had early classes and dip in the morning.

“Then later…please. Wanna do stuff now.”

“Yeah?” and Kyoujurou roughly shoves the hand caressing Tanjrou’s spine into the back of his sweats. “Then pull down your pants for me….all the way, mhm, like that.”

The instruction grounded him and shot off affirmations that soothe away the insecurities darting around in his head like mosquitoes.

Kyoujurou had the ability to make Tanjirou feel like he had the upper hand and could take this where he wanted it to go while still being the one giving the orders. Kyoujurou touched expertly. Purposefully, like he’s memorized Tanjirou’s body, studied all his tells.

“We should try something different,” Kyoujurou whispered against his neck.

Tanjirou barely registered what was happening when the warmth was gone and he turned around. Scrambling, he reached to cover himself but Kyoujurou caught his hands.

“Don't hide from me,” he said, low and firm, red eyes so dark they’re almost black.

It’s cramped on the small bed, another thing he’s self-conscious about but Kyoujurou never seemed to mind. He sat up straight, pulled Tanjirou close so Tanjrou’s bare ass was straddling him, and seated right on—

“Nervous?”

Tanjirou swallowed. “I’m not…just–what should I do?”

He must look helpless because Kyoujurou’s face softened, almost adoring. He brushed their noses back and forth, lashes like feathers. Tanjirou wetted his lips, trying to absorb Kyoujurou’s air.

“You can do anything, ask for anything.” He ran a thumb across Tanjirou’s cheekbone. “I always take the lead because I think it’s what you like. But we can switch it up sometimes.”

It’s so unclear, the things being said. Uncertainties and wishful thinking. Tanjirou couldn’t ever keep up.

“So this time, you have me. Any way you want.” Kyoujurou caressed one of Tanjirou’s earrings, habit. “Is that okay?”

Pulling back to get a better look, Kyoujurou’s gaze dipped down to fixate on Tanjirou’s lips and he stole a kiss like he couldn’t help himself.

Yes, yes, I want it.

They hardly ever do but the few times Tanjirou’s gotten a taste, it set off a million butterflies. Kyoujurou did it again, a pleasing tilt to his smile, and Tanjirou sighed, a little dreamy.

The scale tipped.  His heart swelled. This is good right?

They kissed, light and soft like they were lovers and it was natural. The idea made him blush, mouth parting as he daydreamed.

Taking advantage, Kyoujurou pulled on his lower lip with his teeth, tongue sweeping out.

“You’re so sweet,” he whispered against Tanjirou’s mouth, in a tone akin to awe that ignited something dormant inside. Reinforced the need that already existed to want to please Kyoujurou. “And you learned so quickly, such a good boy for me.”

Coherent thoughts dissipated into tiny air bubbles that clog up his head.

He was aware and he wasn’t, he was in his body and he wasn’t.

He opened his mouth wider so Kyoujurou could push his tongue deeper like he wanted to crawl inside. Lick him from the inside out. Tanjirou ground more forcefully against Kyoujurou’s leg. Fully hard and wanting, making a mess of the man’s pants but too out of it to care.

“Tan.”

“Hmm?”

Distantly heard his name as he slid down the bed, mouthed drunkenly at the damp bulge, and a hand ran through his hair.

Fingers tightened and pulled and every nerve stood on end. “What are you doing?”

“I just…just let me, a little, please.” If he wasn’t so desperate for it, he’d be ashamed.

Kyoujurou laughed in breathy disbelief. “I let you take control and the first thing you want is to suck me off.”

Tanjirou whimpered when a thumb rubbed beneath his eye. Affectionate and soft.

“Where’d I find you?”

Bright eyes zeroed in and watched in rapt attention when Tanjirou pulled out Kyoujurou’s cock and squeezed. It pulsed hot and thick in his palm.

“Orientation. First day,” and flicked his tongue lazily around the head.

Kyoujurou shifted his hips, breathing heavier. “You make it–mmf–sound like I called dibs.”

Tanjirou dragged his lip back and forth over the tip. It was so fun to tease. “Didn’t you?”

He let spit drip down the shaft and licked it up slowly. Kyoujurou tipped his head back, groaning deep in his throat.

“S-Shit—, maybe I did.” Kyoujurou pushed two fingers into Tanjirou’s mouth and Tanjirou tangled his tongue between them as he jerked him off, slick sounds. “Saw this mouth, this pretty face, didn’t want anyone else to have it.”

“Wasn’t gonna happen.” Fuck it, he was always too honest when horny. “I wanted you first.”

“Yeah?” Kyoujurou said and cupped Tanjirou’s neck to urge him down. “No one would know what to do with you. Not the way I do.”

Tanjirou slapped his cock on his tongue and Kyoujurou’s neck strained, Adam’s apple moving as he swallowed.

“Tanjirou—”

He doesn’t even wait. Just swallowed until the tip hit the back of his throat. If it’s one thing he can admit to himself, is that he loved sucking Kyoujurou’s dick, hopefully only Kyoujurou’s.

Like forever, always. No one else.

He worked him like some two-dollar whore, slurped up pre-cum, and jerked the half he couldn’t get in his mouth because Kyoujurou’s a beast. He licked and moaned, lost to it. Sucked hard and Kyoujurou twitched violently, visibly holding back from fucking his mouth because he was letting Tanjirou run the show. 

“You have to—Tan, you have to stop.”

Tanjirou pulled off his cock, spit on it sloppily, and twisted his hand. “Don’t wanna.” His throat hurt but that’s dedication.

“You should–hah–if you want to me fuck you.”

“You can handle it,” and wow, he was feeling bold.

“That’s the game you want to play, hmm?” Kyoujurou tugged his cock and Tanjirou pushed his cheek against it, tongue out.

“Please Kyou, I’ll do it so good for you, put it in my mouth.”

Kyoujurou’s dark brows knit together, smile a little pissed off, a little incredulous like Tanjrou’s been learning this shit from someone else. “Open up for me, I’ll let you have it. So greedy, can’t even wait, all the time.” He fed his cock back into Tanjirou’s mouth, in and out, long strokes.

Tanjirou tightened his lips with each drag, head bobbing up and down, grateful for it. His fingernails trailed down Kyoujurou’s thigh and dug into hard muscle.

“Shit,” Kyoujurou panted, head thrown back. “You’re gonna make me–”

With one last hard suck and a kiss to the tip, Tanjirou moved back with a grin when he saw how damn wrecked Kyoujurou looked. “Better.”

“You’re a…menace,” Kyoujurou gritted out.

“I know,” and moved to straddle Kyoujurou again, legs fitting around him comfortably. Hands went instinctively to his waist and squeezed.

“Eager, I like it,” Kyoujurou lifted his mouth for a kiss and Tanjirou draped his arms over his shoulders, stealing a few of his own. “Now you’re quiet. Getting shy on me?”

Tanjirou pushed his face away and laughed when Kyoujurou nipped his palm. “Stop, this was your idea.”

Kyoujurou bounced him and gripped his ass playfully, startling a yelp out of him. Fingers kneaded and rolled like they were two balls of dough and he arched his back.

“Kyou…c’mon.”

“Ah, I’m comfortable here.”

Asshole, playing dirty.

Tanjirou lowered his voice and nibbled his earlobe. “You sure?”

“Mhm.”

“Oh…I guess you don’t like this?” Tanjirou nosed along his jaw, moaning, breathy and tempting.

Kyoujurou inhaled, body taut. “Not one bit.”

Tanjirou leaned back and Kyoujurou’s hold is firm with no intention of letting go. “So you don’t mind if I get comfy too?” he crisscrossed his arms to lift his sweatshirt, exposing skin inch by inch and Kyoujurou swallowed, eyes fixating on the movement. “S’little hot now.”

“It’s your room. Do whatever you want.”

“If you say so,” and tossed his sweatshirt, vindicated when Kyoujurou’s gaze dipped down to his bare chest.

He’s slight, only putting on lean muscle because Tengen stuck him and the boys on a workout regimen, bellowing that scrawny was unflashy. His hair was always messy, and the scar on his forehead attracted stares. He’s not Inosuke pretty, endearing like Zenitsu, and has been told he’s average.

But with Kyoujurou like this, he felt wanted, like every kiss, every touch from him would set him off.

Desire is empowering. Kyoujurou jerked him forward, hard cock nestled snug beneath his ass.

“Ah…”

Tanjirou hummed and admired freely. Kyoujurou was so good-looking, with an athlete’s body and fat dick. He was sweating, still in his hoodie and the room had awful ventilation. Tanjirou knew it was more than that.

“We should’ve done this sooner,” Kyoujurou’s breath danced across his ear, bringing him back. Tanjirou tilted his head to the side letting him lick a stripe up his neck. “Didn’t know you had it in you.”

“You’re the bossy one, always wanting it your way,” Tanjirou answered, making helpless noises when Kyoujurou dipped down to kiss his chest.

Logic, pride, and anger have left the chat.

“What next?” Kyoujurou murmured, tongue rolling around Tanjirou’s nipple whose eyes clench shut as he offered up more of himself. Always one to oblige, Kyoujurou licked across to the next nipple, teeth scraping harshly.

“Touch me…please.”

“Where? This pretty cock?” Tanjirou gasped when fingers ghost over the tip and swerved around to the back to dip between and caress his hole. “Or here?”

Tanjirou grabbed his wrist to keep his hand there and Kyoujurou’s eyes lit up, smug and sure.

“Please, just do it.”

“Need lube.”

Tanjirou averted his stare to dig under his pillow for the bottle.

“Hah, dirty boy. You were busy today.”

”S-Shut up,” Tanjirou stammered. Kyoujurou’s got real balls teasing him when he was off doing whatever the hell with whoever the fuck. 

Squirting some on his fingers, Kyoujurou nosed his jaw softly. “Were you thinking about me?”

Tanjirou hissed at the cool liquid and prodding fingers circling his rim. “You wish.”

“Tsk, so mean.”

“Kyou,” Tanjirou fisted blonde hair when Kyoujurou bit his earlobe.

“Patience, I have to open you up.,” he breathed, wet fingers dragging over Tanjirou’s hole before he slid one in. Reflexively, Tanjirou clenched down. “Relax, how do you expect–”

“I know, I know–” Tanjirou whimpered, letting out a breath.

It was slow, sensual the way Kyoujurou worked his finger, in and out, shallow, then long and deep. Added another one and god, this is what he almost missed out on. All the pettiness stroked out of him, evaporated when Kyoujurou mouthed and sucked hickeys into his neck.

“Feel good?” Kyoujurou asked, rubbing more lube between Tanjirou’s cleft and pushing two fingers back in, quick and nasty.

“Yes. Yeah, Kyou…” He yelped when Kyoujurou smacked his ass, echoing in the tiny room and he fucked back on the fingers still inside.

“Tempted to make you cum like this,” Kyoujurou rasped, pumping harder, transfixed with the way he was moving. “But you teased me all this time, wouldn’t be fair not to get my dick in you.”

“Then do it…fuck me, already—,” and his vision tilted on its axis when he found himself flat on his back because Kyoujurou had wicked fingers and swift reflexes.

Kyoujurou settled between his spread legs and smirked, running his tongue over his teeth. He pressed down, cocks brushing against each other, and Tanjirou grabbed him, toes curling.

“Say it again,” Kyoujurou said, humping harder.

“God…you just—ugh, please, fuck me, Kyoujurou.”

“Turn over,” and Tanjirou scrambled to obey, loved that heavy body weighing him down onto the sheets, muscles he jerked off to constantly still hidden from view. Arching his back, he turned for kisses and Kyoujurou roughly met his mouth, teeth, and tongue. He bit and sucked on Kyoujurou’s lower lip, nibbled on it while Kyoujurou hissed behind his teeth.

“C’mon, please,” Tanjirou whimpered. Fuck.

Kyoujurou shifted to press their cheeks together. “Ready?” he mumbled in his ear, soft.

“Yeah…always.”

“Breathe, baby,” Kyoujurou said, positioning his cock. “Tell me if it hurts.”

Tanjirou’s sass died in his throat the second he felt that pressure, that burn that made his mouth go slack. “Damn…Kyou…wait–”

Kyoujurou slowed immediately, hands tense like it took maximum effort. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I just–god, you’re big,” Tanjirou mumbled as fingers gently pet his sides, filling him little by little. It was agonizing, it was bone deep but he got what he wanted. That deep ache inside soothed with cock. 

“It’s okay, you’re good, just breathe for me.”

Tanjirou clutched the sheets, inhaling air through his nose out of impatience. He talked all this game, begged to have Kyoujurou inside him and he wasn’t going to pussy out last minute. He bit his lip and peeked over his shoulder. There was a slight sheen of sweat over Kyoujurou’s brow and he looked so concerned it made Tanjirou want to endure it. He rocked back, taking more, panting and unashamed.

“Kyou…Kyou…ah–feels good.”

“Yeah?” Kyoujurou sounded so rough and distracted like he was watching himself slide up in that. “Been a while, hmm? Thought you’d be handling it, on your own or with someone else.”

“Of–of course not.” This wasn’t the time for stupid hypotheticals. He reached back to grab Kyoujurou’s ass, to urge him. “You’re taking too long…c’mon.”

Kyoujurou ignored him to pull him flush on his cock, and Tanjirou gasped out, surprised.

“Of course not, what?”

“Ah,” Tanjirou was about to fucking cry. “Why are you like this today? You know…I haven’t done anything–ugh-- Kyou, please.”

It was slight but the roll of hips was enough to graze that spot inside of him. Kyoujurou always hit it like he did all things, perfect and precise. His head lolled back, lashes fluttering down.

“Hmm, you beg for me so good, makes me wanna give you what you want.”

Yes, yes, he deserved it. He deserved it for the ache in his chest, for the feelings bigger than them both that Tanjirou hid away. This was the most Kyoujurou could do for him. Fuck him hard enough, he won’t feel the hurt when he wakes up alone.

Kyoujurou pulled out, a long glide, hovered at the edge, and slammed back in, hand gripping Tanjirou’s shoulder for leverage. He dug his nails into Kyoujurou’s ass, and felt the flex of muscle as Kyoujurou finally picked up the pace. Jostling forward, the sheets bunched up beneath his knees as the headboard rocked because Kyoujurou gave no shits about who was on the other side. Tanjirou turned around as moans and whimpers were fucked out of him.

Brows furrowed, Kyoujurou had the bottom of his hoodie pulled up and hooked between his teeth, abs shiny with sweat as they tightened with each thrust.

“Just like that…” he whispered, ass bouncing against firm thighs. “Just like that, Kyou—fuck.”

Kyoujurou growled around the fabric in his mouth, smug the second he got Tanjirou cursing, lips curved up in a smirk as he turned brutal. He pulled him back on his dick, almost painfully, and pressed in deep, grinding in circles. Tanjirou widened his knees to lean down and shove his face into the pillow. Ass up, waist small in big hands the way Kyoujurou liked him.

“Keep going,” he babbled, spit dribbling onto the pillow, sex drunk. “Fuck me, h-harder, please.”

“Yeah? Harder than this?” Kyoujurou slammed into him repeatedly and fisted a hand in his hair to jerk his head up. Tanjirou moaned, toes curled. “Shit...you’re too tight, left this ass alone too long.”

“Uh-huh.” Tanjirou couldn’t form words anymore, no thoughts, just the feel of Kyoujurou’s hot skin pasted against his back, his breath heavy in his ears.

He could forget all the bullshit that came afterward when he’s speared on Kyoujurou’s cock like this. When he’s rough in the way Tanjirou needed, when he’s kissing his face tenderly before shoving it back into the sheets.

“Hmmf…I’m close, Tan. Let me…let me come in you, baby.”

The rhythm turned sloppy, desperate and Tanjirou rolled his face to the side. “Please, please….do it,” and he was hauled up at the last minute as Kyoujurou started humping him, shallow like he couldn’t get his cock in deep enough.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he panted in his ear. “Touch yourself,” and Tanjirou didn’t hesitate.

He spat on his hand and worked himself so fast, head rested on Kyoujurou’s chest. His hand flew up and down his cock until Kyoujurou pushed into the hilt and came, teeth clamped down on Tanjirou’s shoulder.

The pulses inside spurred him on as Kyoujurou softened inside, breathing harshly into his sweaty neck, praising him.

“Fuck, yes…cum, such a good boy.”  And Tanjirou arched his back, and squeezed the tip as he came, cum spurting and dribbling over his fist. His hips twitched with the aftershocks, mouth dry as Kyoujurou smeared the mess over his stomach.

“Hmm…perfect,” he murmured in quiet awe as he stroked Tanjirou’s chest, gradually bringing him down from the high.

And Tanjirou’s never felt more in love, never felt more heartbroken. The tears pooled in his eyes on their own and he wiped them quickly with his clean hand. It was over, this was all he knew he could have so why didn’t it get any easier?

Gently, Kyoujurou pulled out and he winced when he felt cum drip down the back of his thighs. Tanjirou was moved to the side away from the stains. He collapsed on his back gratefully, too tired to check what Kyoujurou was doing next to him until he felt himself being wiped down.

“I–I can do it…” he muttered, tired and embarrassed.

“It’s fine, you won’t be comfortable if we leave it.”

“You’re the one who rubbed it all over me.”

Kyoujurou huffed a laugh and Tanjirou sniffled a little. He was handling him so delicately, it both pissed him off and made his heart hurt.

“Thank you…”

“Mhm. Feeling okay?” Kyoujurou tossed the dirty tissues into the waste basket and laid down. He brushed the sweaty hair from Tanjirou’s face.

“Yeah,” he answered, sleepily. “Should’ve used a condom, maybe. No mess.”

He didn’t register how that might have sounded until he caught the shadow of surprise that passed over Kyoujurou’s face.

“Oh, we–I don’t, we never used one before so…” he trailed off uncertainly.

“I…I know.”

“Sorry, I should’ve asked then…”

Tanjirou didn’t know what to do or say. Kyoujurou sounded so confused and Tanjirou had been too horny to remember why they needed one in the first place. Suddenly he’s in a bad mood again.

“Tan,” Kyoujurou said abruptly, searching his face. Calm and at ease like they didn’t just fuck like animals. “I haven’t been with anyone other than you since we started if that’s what you think.”

What?

“What?” Tanjirou said, stupidly. “Didn’t you go on a date last night?” Dumbass, always exposing himself.

Understanding dawned on Kyoujurou and he tongued the inside of his cheek. “Oh, that’s why you’ve been weird.”

“I haven’t been weird!”

Kyoujurou cocked his head, and jerked his chin. “Were you jealous? You can admit it.”

Wow, the jerk never softened any blows. “No one was jealous, dude.”

He received a forehead flick for blatant idiocy, okay that he deserved. Grateful it was so hard because Kyoujurou’s flicks left bruises everywhere else. But he didn’t deny the relief that flooded through him.

“Not that you were subtle, anyway. Ignoring my texts, and my calls! I sent you a puppy rescue TikTok this morning and you didn’t even like it,” Kyoujurou said, scandalized. “You don’t ignore those.”

The afterglow actually allowed him to think clearly and admit maybe he’d overreacted. God, when he’d been packing to move for college, Takeo told him just don’t be cringe. He’d be so embarrassed to see him now.

“Mitsuri’s just a friend,” Kyoujurou continued as if that explained it and Tanjirou rolled his eyes.

Mitsuri, huh, always strategic to know the enemy.

“You can still wanna do stuff with your friend,” Tanjirou argued. Because hello, Exhibit A?

Kyoujurou propped himself up on his elbow, one forked brow lifted. “So…you’d want to “do stuff” with yellow-boy?”

Tanjirou gasped, equal parts grossed out and incredulous. “Jeez, heck no, please don’t ever say that again.”

There’s no comparison because all of Kyoujurou’s boys were buff and hot, the girls busty and delicate. Hardly anyone in Tanjirou’s year would pose as competition unless you counted Genya. They’d been partners on a project and he tried to like him as more than friends, but when you had a taste of top shelf, you didn’t go for wine coolers.

Kyoujurou shuffled back against the cheap headboard. “Maybe we can talk about this without our dicks out. Here, you probably want to put on your pants.” Tanjirou shook his head. “Please put on some pants!”

Tanjirou haphazardly drew the sheets over his lower half.  “Happy?”

Kyoujurou huffed, unsatisfied.

“Anyway, there’s nothing to talk about, it’s cool. It wasn’t a date so... I mean not that you owe me anything I just…”

Two palms cupped his face while yellow and red laser beams bore into his skull.

“You just what? I always tell you to be direct with me, so speak clearly.”

That was hard to do with his cheeks squished together and it may have been playful if Kyoujurou didn't look so intense, so flared up with indignation. If it’s one thing he always stressed, it was that misunderstandings were easily resolved with straightforwardness.

Tanjirou clutched those thick wrists. “You don’t have to tell me who you’re seeing if you’re going on dates. I know…” and stupid, stupid, emotional dummy, his voice was shaky- “I know that’s not what this is.”

Kyoujurou raised his fingers again and Tanjirou quickly shielded his face.

“Please, don’t flick me again!”

“No, I have to, you’re ridiculous. Move your hands. Now.”

“Be nice to me!”

Kyoujurou descended on him, tickled his ribs and that was it, all defenses were down and he rolled over laughing, limp dick out and bare legs kicking, not even embarrassed.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry!” Fingers were relentless against his sides, and he squealed, neck tilting down when Kyoujurou moved the onslaught there.

“Say it, then! Say I’m nice to you!”

“You’re nice to me!” Tanjirou wheezed. “You’re nice to me- oh my god mercy, okay okay.”

Kyoujurou pulled away and sucked in a breath. “So what do you want to do?”

Tanjirou rubbed his ribs, unable to look him in the eyes so he just rolled over. It helped a little, made him braver. He prepared all these months for this question and now couldn’t open his damn mouth other than to apologize.

“What are you sorry for?” Kyoujurou asked, genuinely not understanding.

Ugh, he was going to make him say it. “For ruining this! I…I like you, obviously. I know you could tell, don’t embarrass me.”

The silence that followed told him more than he needed to know. You really went and did it now, good job Tanjirou. He swiped at his eyes again. Fucking cry baby–boohoo Kyoujurou didn’t feel the same. Of course not, what did you exp–

“You like me, huh?” Kyoujurou said softly behind him. “I hope so, I’d be pissed if you were doing this with someone else.”

Oh.

Tanjirou whipped around so quickly that the bed shook. Suspiciously, he checked Kyoujurou’s face for lies but all that he found there was exasperated fondness.

“I don’t know if I believe you.”

Kyoujurou’s eyes crinkled as he rested his cheek on his palm. “You just gotta date me until you do!”

“Th-that’s not how it works,” Tanjirou pointed out.

“Well, yes we skipped a few steps but I like you, too. Since forever but I thought I’d be fine if you just wanted this. It stopped being just about that, though, and I made it so obvious. Blew off all the parties, and hung out with you every chance I had. The boys always figured that’s where I was. You’re hilarious, Kamado. Acting like an expert now when you don’t know about this boyfriend stuff any more than I do.” Kyoujurou smiled, less of a smirk and more reassuring. Like he knew Tanjirou needed him to be for real about this. “We’ll figure it out.”

Tanjirou shoved at Kyoujurou’s broad chest and it was kind of hot when he hardly moved. “Don’t call me Kamado,” he said childish, face heating from the overwhelming rush of feelings. Kyoujurou…Kyoujurou wanted to date him, like legit. “I’m not one of your frat bros.”

Kyoujurou tapped his nose. “You're right! Tan-ji-rou. We’re together now,” smile so terribly cheesy.

“Please, stop.” He wasn’t giddy about it, he wasn’t.

Kyoujurou dramatically draped himself over him and squeezed him close. “Though, I’m offended you thought I went on a date. I’m not an asshole!”

Tanjirou tugged one of the strings of Kyoujurou’s hoodie, fixing him an unimpressed look. “You posted her from the shoulders down.”

“I was trying to get the bubble teas in the picture.”

“It was sus.”

Kyoujurou rolled his eyes, nudging him with his nose. “You could have asked.”

“I didn’t think I could.”

“Well, you know more, apparently.”

“Yes–no I don’t. There’s just a way this usually goes.”

You’d think an ex-campus fuckboy would be more self-aware.

“Ah, I forgot you have experience,” Kyoujurou said, nodding sagely.

Tanjirou covered his face. “No man, you were my first—”

“Oh,” Kyoujurou coughed awkwardly, and great, Tanjirou just wanted to crawl under the bed.

“Damn…so you were a virgin virgin.”

“Bro, shut up, I’ll dump you so fast.”

“Yeah, sure! You like this ass too much.”

His cheeks were on fire and Kyoujurou snickered while smothering kisses all over his face but he figured, this is what he wanted anyway.

Officially. So yeah, Kyoujurou can clown him all day.