Chapter Text
Damon couldn’t believe what had just happened to him. It had been shocking, seeing her standing there, talking to Will and picking up a package, after over a century of him believing that she was trapped in a tomb. He’d recently felt his emotions making attempts at flickering back on and was thinking often about going back to Mystic Falls to see whatever the remaining living resident Salvatores were up to.
First, he’d figured he’d go ahead and get some updated identification, resetting his age on a newer ID down to twenty-one since his current id’s birth date had him aged to forty-seven years old by now. It’d been almost a few decades since he’d been back to Billy’s after the rooftop incident with Lexi. So, he’d been shocked to find that the subject of his affections, no, obsessions and despair, had been apparently doing the same damn thing at the same time. Granted, she’d snuck in the back and was in the middle of making out with ol’ Will, probably just to get her newest identification as a freebie.
“Katherine?” He’d stood there like a dumbstruck fool, shock and a smorgasboard of feelings solidifying his emotional switch setting to on, the overwhelming guilt of the last fifty years of bad behavior being overshadowed by the sight of that woman climbing down from Will’s hold, releasing her legs from the other vampire’s waist where he’d been slammed against the wall.
“Damon?” Both of the other vampires were just as surprised to see him, but Katherine also looked extremely annoyed.
“Hey, man, been awhile, you mind giving me a few more minutes, I mean, I’m kinda busy, no offense?” Will had started to say, before Katherine had broken the vampire’s neck, watching as he’d thumped to the ground.
“Ugh, this is the worst timing, Damon, and Will wasn’t supposed to ever hear my real name. He was supposed to think I was Kristen, turned in 1911, and for the last fifty years he’s been supplying me with new identities, but now I’ll need a new guy,” her irritation was palpable, and a horrible thought crossed Damon’s mind.
“You’re telling me that you’ve been out of the tomb since 1911? Twenty plus years ago I was giving Will most of the ID’s he used to sell to people. You must have seen me around here in the sixties and seventies, does that mean you were hiding from me with one of the identities that I gave him? Why didn’t you tell me that you broke out? I’ve been trying to find a way to get you free ever since 1864! Who managed to open the tomb early for you?” Damon didn’t know what answers he wanted more. Then he’d decided that he didn’t care because she was here, now, and free! Not giving her a chance to answer he’d rushed over and grabbed her in his arms in a tight embrace, and went to kiss her, but she turned her head away.
“Damon, stop! Yes, I’ve been out of the tomb, but no one broke me out. I escaped before it was sealed. I needed everyone to think that I was either dead or trapped. You weren’t supposed to find me yet, it’s too soon and I wasn’t planning on this. I’m supposed to have fifteen years left of freedom to prepare for that stupid comet returning!” She pushed Damon away, swearing out loud over being caught. It was bad enough when Anna had spotted her in the early eighties, but this was even worse!
“Wait, what? I don’t understand, Katherine, why would you hide from me?” Damon was failing to comprehend anything right now.
By the time Katherine finished telling him that she’d avoided him and anyone else that might recognize her because she didn’t want to be found, his head was spinning. Then she closed the conversation off by telling him that she never wanted to see him again, that she’d never loved him, and that he would only get her killed. All that, and after telling him that he needed to forget about her once and for all and find another reason to live, and that if he tried to follow her again then she’d be forced to kill him, she’d snapped his neck as well.
A few hours later, he’d woken up in a coat closet that Will had tossed him in, having woken up first. Hours later after that, he’d gotten his newest ID in a daze after drinking and practically sobbing in a back room to his old acquaintance, who’d taken some pity on him, shocked that ‘Kristen’ had actually turned out to be Damon’s long lost ex, Katherine. Apparently, Will had supplied her with dozens of identities over the last several decades, never really knowing or caring who she actually was. Turns out she’d never paid cash for any of her purchases, either. Damon had to cut Will off when the guy started graphically talking about his latest exploits with her...
Finally, Damon had come to the devastating realization that Katherine had utterly destroyed him, and that everything in his life since meeting her in 1864 had been one giant lie. She’d destroyed his life, gotten him and his little brother killed for nothing, and abandoned them, and he’d even lost his brother because of the resentment and giant rift she’d caused between them. The biggest kick in the ass of all though, was that she’d apparently stopped by to get a student ID created for Whitmore College back in 1957, so it was either the worst coincidence ever, or she probably even knew that he was being held captive and let him rot rather than stage a jailbreak. Hell, for all he knew, maybe Katherine even compelled Joseph and set him up in the first place so that he would never be able to open the tomb and find out that she wasn’t there. She had been the entire reason he’d left Enzo there in the first place. If he’d died there, she would have been trapped in the tomb forever. He’d abandoned his best friend to death so that he could live and save her and now this.
His emotions were all over the place. He couldn’t stop drinking but refused to turn them back off again. Not after his already decades long bender. What would be the point? All he wanted to do now was to find his brother and see if there was any possibility of fixing what was so broken. He’d give his ruined relationship with Stefan one more chance to be fixed, and if that didn’t work this time, then he had no more reason to exist.
That meant he’d have to find Stefan first, and he knew that the first place to look would be Mystic Falls, because Stefan went back to their hometown to visit far more often than Damon. If he could figure out where his brother had gone after the last time he’d visited, maybe he’d be able to pick up Stefan’s trail. It was possible that Stefan had recently talked to the latest human Salvatore or if not he’d likely have left new journals behind.
When Damon arrived in Mystic Falls, he snagged a newspaper, and found himself bummed to see that Kurt Cobain had offed himself. At the same time, he knew that if Stefan rejected him this time, he was to the point that he may just do the same to himself, only he’d just leave his ring in the doorway along with a pile of ash. Or perhaps he’d be less dramatic and just head back to the quarry to toss in the ring and wait for sunrise, where he’d meant to die a hundred and thirty years ago, instead of ever turning into a vampire in the first place.
Damon observed the house for a few hours before deciding to approach, so he’d seen that his brother was already there, inserting himself into the lives of their half-brother’s great-however many times grandson. The man’s name was Zach Salvatore, and he apparently had a pregnant girlfriend. That alone would make Stefan extra difficult to sway, because Stefan would likely be even more protective if there was a child soon to be in the family. If Damon was going to try to get in, it needed to be now, before a new baby Salvatore was born.
This was Damon’s final chance, and he hoped it didn’t backfire, yet again. He was beyond relieved that Lexi Branson didn’t seem to be around, since he wouldn’t stand a chance if she was here to influence Stefan against him. So, with a deep breath, Damon approached the boarding house to knock on the door, muttering to himself, “Here goes everything.”
Damon rang the doorbell while holding his breath longer than any human, and finally turned back around to see Stefan standing there once the door opened. His nerves got the best of him, even worse than when he first began courting women as a young human. Rather that show his vulnerability, he tried to divert Stefan’s attention to the newspaper he’d picked up on the way in.
“Ready for some bad news?” Damon held up the paper showing the front page article about Kurt Cobain’s suicide, chuckling and attempting to walk past Stefan, only to be blocked by a new anti-vampire household barrier. Right. He hadn’t been in the house since Joseph Jr, Zach’s old man and the son of ol’ Joe from ‘53, had once accidentally invited him in while still a child. Zach was lucky to have ever been born since Damon had had his humanity off at the time, but was only there briefly to grab some stuff shortly after escaping Augustine. Apparently JJ had already passed the torch on to Zach now and Damon hadn’t been invited to the funeral.
Stefan just stood there, leaning against the wall, a bemused look on his face. It was possible that their reunion was going to be even shorter than Damon had expected, but Damon had to try, muttering, “Barely seen you in fifty years, Stefan. You could invite a brother in?”
Stefan wasn’t going to make this easy, responding, “Give me one good reason why.”
“Check your answering machine, I'm trying to turn over a new leaf,” Damon was not going to beg, dammit.
“Oh, I heard your message. I also heard you sent Lexi some flowers, seventeen years after you left her to burn to death on a rooftop,” Stefan replied.
“Well…” Damon began to say, but he was still a bit too drunk to come up with anything good.
Luckily, Stefan started to relent a bit, “It's a little late, but I see you're trying to make amends. I just want to know why.”
There was no way in hell that Damon was ready to talk about Katherine yet, “Uh, well, I can tell you this, Stefan...I'm tired of tearing up New York City. And, maybe it's the partying, or maybe it's my conscience...
“Well, I believe that would require one,” Stefan interrupted again.
Damon ignored the snark and went back to rambling, “and then, I had this moment of clarity, and I said, ‘Wouldn't it be great if I just woke up in my own bed and could have a fresh start?’”
It was at this point that Zach showed up, greeting him, “You must be Damon.”
Damon saluted him, and Stefan went ahead with an introduction, “Damon, this is, uh, Zach Salvatore. He owns the house now, he knows the family history, and I told him if you got out of line, I'd take care of you myself.”
Damon inwardly cringed, and outwardly complained, “Why are you always expecting the worst out of me, Stefan?”
Thankfully, Stefan finally gave in, saying, “Oh, I don't. Otherwise, I wouldn't allow this,” as he nodded to Zach.
Damon was a little confused, because that seemed far too easy. Maybe he was just confused because he’d been drinking so much and it wasn’t as easy as he thought? His concept of time passing wasn’t the best after so much bourbon. Days, weeks, hours, minutes, it all just blurred together. He might have been standing here longer than he thought.
Zach immediately called out, “Come on in, Damon.”
Damon wasn’t gonna look a gift horse in the mouth, right? “Huh,” he said as he smiled and walked in, tapping Stefan on the shoulder. “Thanks.”
Stefan seemed strangely cooperative, asking, “You ready to start over?”
“Hell yeah,” Damon replied. This was much better than tossing off his ring. For a few moments he’d even been able to forget what Katherine had done. Maybe he’d even tell Stefan about it once he sobered up. Nope, probably not. What he would do, was get a good nights sleep in a big old bedroom of his own.
Damon just hoped that there were plenty of single ladies boarding here that he could make up for lost time with a few of them tonight. Then again, did he really care if they were single? Not so much, especially right now. All that mattered was that he managed not to kill any of them, so that Stefan wouldn’t turn him away. He’d do his best to snatch, eat, erase, and he wouldn’t pull any shit with Stefan. This visit was too important and he needed it to work out. He could still have fun without getting murderey. Plus, maybe Zach wouldn’t be so bad, either. The man seemed friendly enough, and Damon missed having family, too. Even if Zach’s grandfather Joseph had been a bad egg.
He was still feeling a bit rough though, so he’d claimed it had been a long few days and he wanted to go up to take a load off in his room, which he did. He also managed to snag one of the guests that was boarding next to him, a pretty young delicate thing, she was. Thankfully she was quite a naughty vixen and they had a great time together. She didn’t even complain when he bit her a little, but he was careful not to take much, but he still compelled her not to be afraid or remember it. He got her on the inside of her thigh right after her orgasm, so he’d just have to compel her to wear something a little longer.
Soon enough he passed out, and when he walked out of his room the next morning with a girl that appeared healthy and happy, Stefan looked her over but didn’t notice anything amiss, so he said nothing. Damon raised an eyebrow at Stefan as his brother inspected her undamaged neckline. Everything seemed to be going great!
Later that morning, Damon was spending some quality time outside with Stefan, wiping down the cars. Stefan had taken the opportunity to tease him for unsuspectingly drinking some disgusting squirrelly blood, which nearly made him barf. Apparently his still brother wasn’t on human blood. That would make things more difficult, since Stefan wanted Damon to share in his misery of being sick and weak, and Damon could barely swallow the mouthful from his brother’s flask. That meant that now he would have to hide his feeding habits, which wasn’t a good thing. Unfortunately, Stefan just didn’t compromise and had unrealistic expectations sometimes. Still, leaving wasn’t an option for Damon, because he had nowhere else to go or any other reason to care about his existence besides bonding with Stefan.
He made some joking remarks about taking over the boarding house and getting in with Gail when Zach’s girlfriend showed up in the doorway and went to kiss her boyfriend as he brought in some groceries. Of course Stefan had to take him seriously, and warned Damon that the humans were on vervain and that he was to back off. It was in Damon’s nature to take that as an invitation, despite the fact that he’d rather avoid harming either of them. After all, they were family, but the vervain had to go.
Once Damon figured out out that the vervain was in their coffee he did what any rational vampire would do and swapped it out for fresh stuff. After a few days he did a taste test on them and simply compelled them both to forget. This way, if either of them ever caught him snacking on any other guests he could just compel them not to notice that either. It was all just a safety precaution so that Stefan wouldn’t find out that Damon couldn’t stomach that awful animal diet.
Damon was being careful and wasn’t hurting anyone, just grazing, getting fresh sips here and there to supplement those gross stale blood bags, which he also had to hide. Eventually his brother would back off, and by the time he found out that Damon still drank from humans, he’d be fine with it since Damon would have proved that he could do it without anyone getting hurt. Right?
As the days turned into a few weeks, Damon found that the pain of finding out that Katherine didn’t care about him was slowly fading. In a way, he finally felt more free than he ever had, and was glad that he found out early, fifteen years before the comet returned. He was really starting to love being back home, and had even made friends with Zach and Gail, both of whom seemed to really trust him. The guests were great; he’d usually feed from them on their last night before they left, to minimize getting caught by Stefan. His brother was even becoming a bit less suspicious towards him, even if he was still rather uptight and still insisting that animal blood was the only acceptable form of blood in this house. Damon tried not to argue with him, and just hid his feeding habits to avoid conflict since the whole goal was brother bonding.
Unfortunately, Damon still didn’t feel quite ready to be honest with him, yet. Something was telling him that he needed to hold back for a while longer. Part of that was because any time Damon spent the night with guests, Stefan was still giving him looks of distrust, even when the girls left with pep in their step.
The thing was, Damon needed to cuddle with someone at night or he’d start having bad dreams again. Ever since his humanity had come back on, he found that being alone at night meant having nightmares about Augustine. As if the thought of that horrible place and the torture he’d suffered wasn’t bad enough, it would also remind him of how he’d let Enzo die. That, to him, was by far the most painful, crippling guilt of any of the demons in his past hundred years, and he’d definitely never talk to anyone about it, especially Stefan. Stefan wouldn’t want to hear about Damon’s problems, it would only make him worry about the safety of the humans around them.
So, he kept the nightmares at bay by bringing a boarding guest into his room to sleep with every night. He didn’t even always have sex or feed on them. Sometimes he just had them hold him so he could get a good night’s sleep. That was definitely not something he planned on admitting, ever. Although, maybe after a few months, Stefan would be ready to accept that Damon was really here to start over and ‘brother bond’, and then he could share the news about Katherine. Damon certainly didn’t want anything to go wrong now.
Tomorrow, Zach and Gail were going to be throwing a big party, with some of the townies invited as well. Apparently, there was going to be an eclipse. Damon was looking forward to it, because it meant even more people to possibly feed from, or maybe just flirt with or befriend. Or, well... cuddle. Either way, his mood had been steadily improving and he was finally starting to feel happy again. Happiness was such a foreign feeling, but he welcomed it, and was finally at a point where the guilt had been shoved away and compartmentalized, without needing to turn his emotions off. A party would be a lot of fun, and maybe even Stefan would enjoy it for once!