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When Orihara Izaya woke up that cold, rainy morning, he never would have imagined that it’d be the day when he got caught by his mortal enemy, not after so many years of successfully outrunning and outsmarting the man. Their usual routine involved Izaya teasing or insulting Shizuo and then the dumb brute running after him, shouting silly nicknames like insect, flea, louse and a few others, as well as threatening him with physical harm for daring to set foot in Ikebukuro.
It should’ve been a day like any other, but it turned out not to be one the moment Shizuo had sneakily thrown a vending machine at Izaya, the action leading to the Informant falling and hitting his head. Izaya had tried to escape, but after failing to outrun the maddened beast, he found himself in the humiliating position of kneeling at his archenemy’s feet while Shizuo continued to twist his arm to keep him there. His entire face hurt after the punch he’d just received and it felt as though his arm would soon snap if Shizuo didn’t stop twisting it, and yet he still defiantly kept his head up, brown-red eyes staring into hateful honey-colored ones.
Most people would’ve flinched when Shizuo raised his fist, but Izaya continued to glare at the man, unconsciously licking some blood off his split lip. He waited for the pain he knew he would experience the moment that monstrous fist collided with his face, but the impact never came and Izaya raised his free hand to wipe away the blood while wondering why Shizuo was hesitating to punch him and get it over with. The dumb brute appeared to simply be staring at him in what looked like shock for some reason, eyes wide and mouth slightly open, enough to make Izaya wonder if the cigarette the idiot was smoking might end up slipping from between dry lips.
It was starting to get awkward kneeling before his enemy for so long, and seeing how Shizuo was hesitating, Izaya figured he should say something that would hopefully help the man decide whether he was going to free him or beat him to a bloody pulp. "Aww, Shizu-chan, that wasn’t very nice of you. You know how much it hurts my feelings when you get so rough with me for no reason,” he jeered, struggling to keep his voice steady even though he was in a lot of pain because of the way in which the man kept squeezing his wrist.
"I have plenty of reasons to bash your head in. Besides, how can I hurt something that never existed to begin with?"
"Now you're just being mean," Izaya replied, pouting. It had always bothered him that Shizuo saw him as nothing more than an insect, but he was very much aware of how hypocritical he was being since he himself saw the blond as nothing more than a beast. At that point, Izaya expected Shizuo to insult him again, but what he heard next were words he never would’ve imagined coming out of Ikebukuro beast’s mouth.
"This is it, flea, it’s now or never. Just as you are now, on your knees in front of me, sincerely apologize for all the shit you’ve done to me over the years and I’ll let you go.”
For a second time that night, Izaya burst into laugher. “Shizu-chan is being really silly if he thinks that I will ever…” He never finished though, not when he saw Shizuo’s already quite terrifying expression morph into one of pure hatred and unadulterated fury. He wanted nothing more than to tell Shizuo to fuck off and leave him the hell alone since he had no intention of ever sincerely apologizing to someone he couldn’t stand, and yet as he continued to kneel there while his arm remained twisted to near-breaking point, he couldn’t help but wonder if bullshitting Shizuo wouldn’t be a far better choice than taking a beating. It certainly seemed wiser.
“You’ll what?” Shizuo snarled, eyes nearly burning with the hatred incinerating him from deep within.
After swallowing the lump in his throat, because it looked like Shizuo might just kill him for real, Izaya forced a small smile on his face as he fought to rein in the insults burning on the tip of his tongue. “That I will ever apologize to you before you apologize to me.”
“What…?” Shizuo asked, his expression changing from one of utter fury to one of mostly confusion. “I’ve got nothing to apologize for,” he snarled in disgust.
Izaya shook his head in disappointment, inwardly sighing in relief at the sight of a confused Shizuo as opposed to one of a bloodthirsty, crazed beast. “Need I remind you who the first one to attack was?” The grip on his wrist loosened a bit, Shizuo’s expression once again changing but this time to one of shock mixed with what Izaya assumed was guilt. “I figured that since you were Shinra’s friend, we might’ve ended up being friends too, but you, like the dumb, inconsiderate brute that you were, are and will always be, went ahead and declared that you didn’t like me even though we had never talked before.”
“Yeah, and it looks like I was right since you turned out to be the biggest scumbag I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting,” Shizuo argued even as he felt a sliver of guilt twisting around in his heart. He’d never thought about it that way, but looking back, he couldn’t help but reluctantly admit that attacking Izaya without provocation had been quite the shitty thing to do. Cursing under his breath, he kicked the switchblade away and released Izaya’s wrist, taking a step backwards in order to put some distance between himself and the insect before he really did something he might end up regretting, especially when he was still pretty disturbed by the messed up reaction his body was still somewhat experiencing.
Izaya slowly stood up while cradling his luckily not broken arm. “Why don’t you sleep on it and then next time we meet, we’ll talk about it?” Izaya suggested as he tried to slip past Shizuo, but the beast blocked his path, growling and glaring at him like an animal not yet willing to give up its prey. “Listen, Shizu-chan, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but my head is bleeding, quite badly I might add, so unless you really plan to kill me, I suggest you get out of my way.”
“Maybe I will kill you,” Shizuo declared as he took a long drag from the cigarette. “Or maybe I’ll settle on breaking every bone in your body.”
“What crawled up your ass?” Izaya asked, voice dripping with irritation. “I know that you’re a dick in general, but today you’re being extra douchey, even for someone as douchey as you. I mean, I was merely people-watching while taking a stroll through Ikebukuro when you threw a vending machine at me out of nowhere. Not that you throwing things at me is out of the ordinary, but you kept chasing me instead of stopping and slinking back to the hole you crawled out of.”
“Shut up,” Shizuo growled threateningly, fingers flexing as he debated what to do next.
Izaya let out a long sigh, rolled his eyes and shook his head. “If you had a shitty day, don’t go taking it out on me,” he said, seeing it as more than a reasonable request. “Talk again when you’re not being a complete dick.” This time, he ignored Shizuo’s threatening glare and walked past the man, breathing in relief once he was out of the dark alley where he could’ve gotten killed, but not before he made sure to pick up his switchblade.
What Izaya didn’t know was how close of a call it’d been.