Chapter Text
Penelope watched as her dearest friend paced around her room. An endless litany of anxious speech, pouring from her mouth.
“The Queen!” Eloise mimed placing a crown on her head, “Thinks I,” she points emphatically about herself, “am Whistledown! Me. She sincerely thinks that I have been fooling and afronting the entire ton for two seasons. I could not even walk into my presentation into society without feeling faint. How can she think me capable of this?” Eloise turned on the spot to face Penelope head on. “And my family, Pen. She will ruin them. And there is no way that I can possibly convince her otherwise.”
Penelope took advantage of the brief pause, “Eloise, we will find a solution. I am sure of it.”
“What possible solution could there be? No one tells the Queen she is wrong. The least of all me. Not even the Bridgertons could withstand this. I have ruined my family's prospects because of my own stubborn inclinations. You warned me, Pen. You told me no good could come from visiting Theo and you were right.” She plopped unceremoniously onto the settee beside Penelope and hid her face in her hands.
Penelope gently patted her back.The calm surface of her demeanor disguising the war within. She could not let her friend live in such agony. She could not curse the Bridgertons in this way when they had so often been kinder and gentler than her own mother and sisters. Penelope had guarded her secret so closely. It had felt good to unburden herself to Madame Delacroix perhaps it could be just as freeing to confide in her dearest friend?
“I think I may have a solution,” said Penelope as she turned to face her friend head on.
“There can be no solution. I will simply run away. If I am gone, she cannot think I am Whistledown, as the scandal sheet will still be published. It will make my family quite sad, I should think, but in the end, I will find a way to show them it was for the best. Will you help me . . . “
“Eloise, you must be calm!”
Eloise was stunned into silence as her always docile friend had never spoken as harshly or as loudly to her. Penelope closed her eyes and took a steadying breath.
“I have something to tell you,” said Penelope, “Something that will help you if you will let me. Do you promise to hear me to the end? It will make many things clear.”
Eloise nodded and sat back against the arm of the settee.
“Where do I begin,” said Penelope as she smoothed her hands down the front of her dress. “You see last year without you with me at balls and parties, I was quite lonely. I observed a great deal. I would come home and write down my observations, just little things to amuse myself, and perhaps to tell you about later. However, one day, I left my writing unattended and my father’s solicitor saw it. It was at his behest that I began to publish my writings, under a nom de plume, of course.” Penelope avoided Eloise’s eyes.
If she had been looking, she would have seen the creeping realization to be replaced by a wicked grin.
“Penelope Featherington! You are Lady Whistledown?”
Penelope’s head snapped up and she looked sternly at Eloise, “Shhhhh, keep your voice down. God forbid my sisters or a servant find out. My goose would be well and truly cooked if they did, and might I remind you, so would yours!”
“How ever did you keep this secret? I visited a print shop some 3 times and was discovered outright?”
Penelope shrugged, “It’s simple, no one notices me.”
“That isn’t true,” said Eloise. She took her friend’s hand in her own.
Penelope smiled at her. “I know you see me, but to most people, I am invisible. It once bothered me a great deal, but it has actually become quite the boon for me.”
“So you sneak about town, and publish secret scandal sheets. Do you also fight duels? Are you a pirate during your time in the country? What else do I not know of you?”
Penelope laughed good-naturedly. “I promise, El, I am still very much the same person you have always known and called friend. Were it not for Whisledown, I would be the dullest person with whom you were acquainted!”
The friends were silent for a moment. Eloise drew back from the catalog of her memory. What had she missed in the interactions with her friends? What seeds of deception had she overlooked? Eloise was not angry. She understood the need for secrecy. She found herself most perplexed by the unkind words Penelope had said of herself and of her sisters and of Marina.
“Penelope, please know that as your friend, I will not judge your decisions, but you ruined your cousin? What could have driven you to such a decision? You must have known that Colin would raise a child even were it not his own.”
Penelope diverted her eyes once more. “I know. I know Colin would have wed her despite her situation. You must know I tried to tell him. I could think of no other way. Colin is too good to be tied down in such a way.”
“And if he married Marina, he would not be free to one day marry you?” Eloise’s tone was surprisingly gentle.
Penelope’s cheeks flushed and her eyes welled with embarrassed tears. “You must think me awful. I ruined a family member to save a man who has no intention of marrying me. I could not let him marry her, Eloise. I could not watch her trick him. I know it was selfish and childish. It tortured me, but I made a choice, and I would make it again.”
Eloise clutched her friend’s hand. “I am thankful to you for that. You must also know that I would gladly marry you off to any of my brothers so we could really and truly be sisters. It seems to me that of the wrongs done in this situation neither yours or Marina’s were the greatest. Society forces women to love in secret, and tells us nothing of the things men know freely. I am surprised more young women do not end up in your cousin’s state.”
“Thank you, for not thinking ill of me. You would have a right to be angry not just about Marina but about the secrets as well.”
“I know now when it is most important that I do. However, I do not know how this fixes our problem. The Queen will not believe that we are not lying simply to save my reputation.”
“I have an idea, but we must take a promenade today. We are going to bump into Lady Danbury, and we will enlist her help to gain the ear of the Queen.”
Lady Danbury took a walk around Rotten Row every Thursday afternoon like clockwork. It was important that she remain in the forefront of the minds of the ton lest they cease to fear her. She took quite a perverse delight in the way that promenading couples and families would attempt a not so subtle about face when they heard the familiar step, step, tap, step, step, tap of her approach. The cane was necessary to aide her speed to make their hasty retreats useless. There was no escaping Lady Danbury no matter how others tried. It was, therefore, a great surprise when she saw a pair of heads, one fiery red and one dark brown, hurrying purposefully in her direction.
“Lady Danbury,” called Penelope as they approached, “What a pleasant surprise!”
“This is quite the furthest thing from a surprise, and no one is pleased to see me, so that must mean that you require my services in some way?” Lady Danbury tilted her head to look at the girls impassively.
Penelope smiled brightly. “You see, Eloise, I knew Lady Danbury was just the person to come to.”
“Flattery will get you nowhere, Miss Featherington.”
“In my experience, flattery will get one everywhere, Lady Danbury, but perhaps we could walk to a more private place to make our request?”
A half an hour later on a bench under the shade of an ancient elm, Lady Danbury sat open mouthed and surprised as she ever had been in her not insubstantial number of years on this earth.
“Am I to understand that you are Lady Whistledown, Miss Featherington?” asked Lady Danbury.
“She is,” said Eloise with a tinge of pride, “and she is brilliant, is she not?”
“Quite brilliant, indeed. I must say I am surprised, but I am also rather pleased to discover that you have such wit and daring in you. I knew you could not have been as insipid as your sisters. I have a very keen sense of people, you know?”
“Thank you,” said Penelope. “However, that is not all there is to the story, and this is where we might beg your assistance!”
Lady Danbury inclined her head for Penelope to continue.
“Through a curious misunderstanding, Her Majesty is of the very decided opinion that Eloise is Lady Whistledown, and has threatened to ruin her family’s good name should Eloise not comply with the Queen’s requests in publishing only favorable and approved reports of the Crown. As you can imagine, the machinations of my scheme can hardly bear more secrecy, and having to wait to receive secret word from Eloise of the Queen’s wishes would be needlessly burdensome for everyone involved. However, I would be willing to take on her Majesty’s request if only you could help us obtain an audience, and help convince her of Lady Whistledown’s true identity.”
“You two certainly have a curious talent for trouble. I can and will offer what assistance I can. Lady Bridgerton has been a dear friend for quite some years, and no matter what this one has done,” she waved her cane vaguely in the direction of Eloise, “Her sisters and brothers do not deserve to have their prospects ruined.”
Eloise crossed her arms in a huff. “Lady Danbury, please know that I feel nothing short of wretched about the harm I could potentially cause my family. I am headstrong and willful and backwards, but I love them dearly. I will do whatever I must to save their good names.”
Lady Danbury sighed. “I will warn you. I can assure you an audience, and I can assure my corroboration with your story, but Queen Charlotte is unused to being told she is wrong, and your plan may bring about unintended consequences. You must prepare yourselves for disappointment.”
The two girls shared a meaningful glance, and finally Eloise gave Penelope a slight nod. “We are willing to try,” said Penelope.
“It is at the moment our best and only option,” added Eloise.
“Then you must be ready as soon as I send word,” said Lady Danbury as she rose slowly and regally from the bench, “Now for all of my time and gracious offer of assistance, I believe you girls owe me an ice.”
Gunter’s was crowded, but the girls soon discovered that traveling in the company of Lady Danbury had many advantages. Chiefly that in people’s haste to avoid her, they vacated tables and chairs with comical swiftness, so that was how the three eldest Bridgerton brothers happened upon the three ladies seated happily eating ices and listening to the reminisce of Lady Danbury’s debut season.
“Why what an unlikely surprise to find three such lovely ladies all in one place,” said Benedict as they approached them.
“Mr. Bridgerton, you are the most appalling flirt,” said Lady Danbury.
“And so complimentary as well,” joked Benedict good-naturedly.
“Benedict, spare your charm for others. I can assure you that it will have no effect on anyone here,” said Eloise while giving her spoon a final unladylike swipe of her tongue.
“I don’t know, Miss Featherington, do you not find me charming,” he batted his eyes at her flirtatiously. Penelope blushed and drew a spoonful of ice cream to her mouth to avoid having to respond.
“Leave, Pen alone, Benedict,” said Colin as he pulled a fourth chair to the table and wedged himself between Penelope and Eloise. “Pay no mind to him, Miss Featherington, the paint fumes have addled his brain.” He turned to his brother, “Make yourself useful Ben and get us all an ice. I am positively famished.”
All three of his Bridgerton siblings gave a snort. “Oh, no, Colin is famished,” cried Eloise.
“He must not have eaten for what, a half an hour,” said Anthony in mock concern.
“Hush, you all.I am a growing boy, and I must have food to sustain me. Isn’t that right, Penelope?” he said as he dipped her abandoned spoon back into her ice cream and took a large bite.
“I do not know, Colin, you seem well enough grown to me,” she said with a shy smile.
Anthony and Benedict exchanged sly smiles. “Quite the grown boy aren’t you, Col!” ribbed Benedict.
“I do not know, parts of him might still be growing,” replied Anthony.
Penelope was startled and confused. This was the way of the world she supposed. There was always some subtext, some under running current of secrecy between men that women were doomed, perhaps forever, to never understand. She knew their words meant more, but without a decided breach of etiquette she could not inquire, and could therefore, never know what her innocent words had implied to the three men. It made her feel foolish and it made her feel angry.
“Upon reflection, perhaps none of you are grown,” replied Penelope much to her own surprise.
“Well said, Mrs. Featherington. We have had quite enough of your nonsense. Now, I require an escort home, and you two,” she pointed her cane at Colin and Benedict, “are entirely too rapacious to be left alone with Miss Featherington, so you shall both have the honor of walking me.”
Neither Bridgerton brother was able to suppress their groan. “Now, if you are both very good on our walk, I will regale you of the many adventures of my days gone by.”
“Oh, Lady Danbury, I do not know that my heart could take such excitement,” said Benedict, holding his hand to his heart.
“And here I thought you were made of sterner stuff, Mr. Bridgerton.”
Penelope grinned openly as she watched the matriarch leave with a young Bridgerton brother on each arm. She did not notice Anthony slipping into the chair beside her.
“I do apologize, Miss Featherington, for mine and my brothers’ behavior. We did not wish to embarrass you. It is that you have grown so much like family that we sometimes forget ourselves,” said Anthony.
“It is perfectly fine, Lord Bridgerton. I fear the level of comfort must run both ways as I should not have spoken to you all as I did,” she blushed prettily down at her hands.
“Oh, Pen, please never apologize to my brothers ever again. They are beasts who should not have been released into society,” said Eloise.
“For once Eloise and I are in perfect agreement. You must pay us no mind, Miss Featherington.”
But however Penelope tried, she could not erase the friendly smile on Colin’s face or the way he had taken her own spoon for himself. Colin was not a beast, but he was a peculiar burden for Penelope to bear.