Chapter Text
Katsuki has been dead for ten years, but the hole he left in Izuku’s heart is still bleeding. Izuku was 26 and had yet to have a lasting romantic relationship, he couldn’t help but compare all of them with Katsuki.
Back when the war had just ended and Deku had just gone over his first bout of grief he just felt empty, on automatic as he completed his last year at UA, without Bakugou, who had always been present in his life, even when the blond himself didn’t want to. At first, as the influences of All for One were still present Izuku made it his mission to bring anyone related to Katsuki’s death, even just by association, to justice. He fought hard as a newly graduated pro-hero to catch All for One’s allies and supporters.
After a few years, with all traces of All for One gone, Izuku felt purposeless. His “revenge” had been completed but the love of his life was still gone and Deku still felt empty.
So he focused on saving people (his job) and although being number 1 had no meaning to him anymore, he managed to get quite high in the ranking. However, Deku had become more reckless, being in the hospital practically twice a week on injuries ranging from broken bones to punctured lungs.
Deku was currently #3, behind Todoroki and Yaoyorozu, who dominated the rankings since a few years back. Deku worked at Shoto’s agency, unwilling to open his agency, and after a long hospitalization, he had come to report his return to work.
“No.” Todoroki said frowning, almost frustrated as he looked at an incredulous Izuku.
“W-what? No? What do you mean no?!” Izuku asked, bewildered by his best friend’s serious response.
“Do you know how many times you’ve ended up in the hospital this year alone? 30, 30 times!” Todoroki burst out.
Deku frowned “If you’re worried about the cos-“
“Don’t even fucking finish that sentence!” Todoroki snapped back, seeing him angry was a rare sight. “At this rate you’re going to end up dead!”
“Then I’ll look for another agency if I’m such a bother.” Izuku snarled back, defensive.
Todoroki blustered. “I’m not the only one worried about you, we got together and decided we can’t let you do this anymore.” He said, returning to his impassive gaze.
“ We ?!”
“Yes we! Your friends, the people that care about you!” Shoto said, raising his voice once again.
Izuku laughed bitterly. “And what exactly are you going to do, fire me?”
Todoroki sighed. “No, I’m making you take an extended leave, and mandatory therapy sessions.” He said that as he pushed a notice paper to the front of his desk.
Deku scoffed, he was a really strong hero despite his inability to stay away from the hospital so any agency would be more than happy to take him, he had stayed with Todoroki because he was his best friend, someone Izuku could trust with his life, but he could even open his own agency if he wanted.
“Ha! I’ll just look for another agency, Shoto.” He looked over the documents with a dismissive gaze
“None of our friends’ agencies will take you either.” Todoroki stated, looking at him seriously.
Izuku gave a mocking laugh. “Newsflash Shoto, the world doesn’t revolve around class 1A,” At least not anymore. “so grow up.”
“No one from class B or C will either.” Shoto retorted. “And I’ll do anything in my power so no other agency does either.” That was a little harder to get around, as number 1, Shoto could prevent Deku from being hired, more so if the rest of their former classmates, the current cream of the crop of the hero industry were in on it.
Deku gritted his teeth, he could make threats of his own. “I’ll still leave if you threaten me like this.” He could go away from Japan even if it was just to spite the other man, maybe if he said something so drastic Todoroki would get off his back.
“You can’t leave Japan either, Koji will revoke your hero license if you try.” Shoto stated, his eyes still inexpressive.
Koji had become the president of the Hero Commission a few months back, so the possibility was very much real.
“What is wrong with you! You can’t control my life!” Deku snapped, truly angry as his friend posed a very real threat. “What then?! you are going to keep me on time out and then what?”
“There’s an open position at UA, teaching the seniors.” Shoto stated more calmly as he also placed the job application in front of the green-haired man. “I think this could be a good opportunity for you to finally let yourself heal, physically and emotionally.”
It was true that Izuku had been more often than not disobeying the recommended rest times doctors had given him, but that was no reason to corner him like this. “Why are you doing this to me?! Aren’t you supposed to be my friend?!” Deku cried in anger.
“It’s because I’m your friend that I’m doing this!” Todoroki cried back. “I can’t watch you destroy yourself anymore! This is not what he would want either and you know it!” His voice trembled as it did every time he was mentioned, even after ten years.
“Don’t you dare mention him Shoto!” Izuku screamed, they didn’t need to say who they were referring to. “Don’t you DARE use him against me to make me do what you want.” He said darkly.
Tense silence permeated the room.
Shoto slumped in his seat. “Izuku…I’m not trying to use Katsuki against you…” He ran a hand through his face in frustration. “I just can’t lose another friend, I can’t lose you too.”
“If you do this, you’re going to lose me anyway.” Deku said vehemently. “I will never forgive you if you do this to me, Shoto.” He said with finality.
Todoroki’s head hangs low before he looks back up with determined eyes. “If that means you’ll stay alive and well…then that’s fine with me.”
There’s silence once again.
“Fuck you.” Deku said, clenching the papers handed to him. “Fuck you, Todoroki!” He said as he stomped out of the office with a slam of the door.
Once outside he checked his phone, seeing tons of notifications from all his friends and classmates apologizing but siding with Shoto, even his mom and All Might had sent texts confirming they thought this was the best for him. Confirming what the number one hero had told him “FUCK!” He smashes his phone to the ground, shattering it.
---
He went to drink himself dumb at his favorite bar, not an uncommon occurrence, unfortunately. It was a nice bar, not too crowded since that would risk being recognized, plus Deku knew the owner. On this particular occasion, it was empty as few people went out drinking at 4 p.m. on a Tuesday.
Izuku spins around his drink with a sigh, still in shock all his family and friends had betrayed him with the excuse that it was ‘for his own good’, sure they were right that Izuku ended up at the hospital way too much, but he was saving people and that was more important than anything else, right?
The door of the bar opened, but Deku barely registered it.
“...How dare you be so fucking pathetic,” A rough voice said somewhere behind Izuku. “You said you would be number 1, so what the fuck is this?” Someone in a UA uniform said.
The familiar voice sent an electric shock through Izuku’s spine, he turned around as fast as his body would allow. Deku shook as he spotted a boy whose face remained hidden by spiky hair, though the wrong shade of blonde, Deku’s whole soul shook. His mouth opened but no sound came out.
“Tch.” The teenager said before he turned around and fled the bar before Deku could do anything about it.
“W-wait!” Deku said, had he hallucinated?
“Mr. Midoriya, is there something wrong?” The owner of the bar, a woman with dirty blonde hair said as she exited the staff area to return to the bar stand.
“T-there, there was a…uh minor that entered the bar just now, I just…” Izuku tried to explain, but the mixed emotions of the interactions choked him up.
“Oh, yes, that was probably my son, Kai, he’s a senior at UA.” Misami, the bartender and owner said with a smile. “He’s actually a really big fan of yours, although he would never admit it.” She laughed. “I offered to let him in to meet you, but he strongly refused. I think he might be a little too shy to meet his favorite hero.”
Izuku was…disappointed, he admonished himself for hoping for something impossible, and then he winced. “I think I actually upset him by being here, he ran as soon as he saw me…” Deku felt bad for disappointing a fan.
“Don’t worry.” Misami chuckled. “I’m sure he was just too shy to talk to you.”
“Yeah, maybe…” Deku said before returning to his whiskey, but he couldn’t get the interaction off his head.
---
Left with no option he applied to be a teacher at UA, thankfully he wouldn’t be the main teacher to the students, which Izuku felt he was in no way qualified to do. He would be their history and close combat teacher, which was good enough, and despite him being resentful of having to take that job he was starting to warm up to the idea. Soon enough he got a positive response, probably Shoto’s influence as this was his plan to begin with.
Of course, Deku hadn’t considered he would have to encounter his former teacher when he entered the UA’s teacher faculty for the first time.
“Problem child, it has been a while,” Aizawa stated, now vice principal and in charge of welcoming new staff at the school.
“Oh, hello Aizawa-sensei, it has been a while since we last spoke.” Izuku said back, still used to the honorific.
“Don’t call me sensei, I’m not your teacher anymore, in fact as of right now you’ll be a teacher too.” Aizawa said matter of factly.
Deku scratched his neck. “Haha, I guess you’re right, vice-principal Aizawa.”
Aizawa grunted. “That’s even worse.” He said as he organized the paperwork to make Izuku’s job official.
“Wait, you don’t seem surprised to see me here.” Izuku reasoned, pointing an accusatory finger at his teacher. “Did you know they were planning this.”
“….I did.”
“Then why didn’t you stop them! They have no right to control me like this!”
“Midoriya, they are right. You are destroying yourself and for nothing.” Aizawa said, almost angry before looking at the younger hero with pained eyes. “I don’t want to bury another one of my students.” He stated vehemently, effectively shutting Izuku up. Aizawa sighed. “Anyway, I’ll walk you to your classroom.”
Izuku nodded and followed obediently, once outside the classroom, so much like his own ten years ago, Aizawa turned back to him.
“Give me a moment while I explain everything to the students.” He entered the classroom as Izuku continued to wait outside.
Deku couldn’t hear what Aizawa was saying, but he figured he was explaining that a new teacher was going to teach them.
Aizawa opened the door once again and gestured for Izuku to come inside. Deku’s chest filled with anticipation and nostalgia, remembering his own time as a student in a classroom very similar to the one he was entering.
Izuku went inside, stood in the front of the room, and greeted everyone as they gasped in surprise at the #3 top hero being their new teacher. “Hello everyone, as some of you may know I’m Midoriya Izuku, or hero Deku. It’s very nice to meet all of y-“
In the back of the room, familiar red eyes looked at him in surprise. The words died in Izuku’s mouth as he saw the student from the bar, and now that his hair wasn’t in the way his face could be seen, a face exactly as Izuku remembered Katsuki Bakugou’s face to be.
“Tch.” The teenager scoffed and turned his head to the side.
“I‘ll leave them in your care then Midoriya,” Aizawa said, snapping Deku out of his trance. “Don’t be too hard on them.” He placed a hand on the now taller man while giving Deku a meaningful look.
Izuku gave a wobbly smile back. “R-right, thank you Aizawa-sensei.” He tried to compose himself with the mantra that the student he saw wasn’t Katsuki, even if he looked like it. The pro hero busied himself by turning around and starting to write down in the whiteboard the class rubrics.
The class went by agonizingly slow, every time Izuku turned around he couldn’t stop his eyes from automatically looking at the student with red eyes, maybe his mind wanted to burn in his memory, rusty after 10 years, of what Bakugou Katsuki looked like alive and well as the senior in UA he never got to be.
Nevertheless class ended and Kai, who looked eerily like Izuku’s childhood friend, bolted outside leaving Deku with all the questions he was probably never going to ask anyway.
“Sorry about him, Deku-sensei.” Amarashi Sasha, another student said. She had shoulder-length green hair and shiny all-pink eyes. “He doesn’t like you a lot, he says you are too reckless as a hero.”
“What?” Izuku asked dumbly. “Why would he say that?” Did he randomly mention that? Izuku felt like he was back in middle school dreading what Katsuki was saying about him, but unable to stop himself from wanting to know.
“In first year our teachers asked who was our favorite hero, but Kai-kun ended up saying you were his least favorite hero, because you cared more about the people you were saving than your own integrity.” Amarashi said.
“But then why mention that when asked about his favorite hero?” Izuku asked breathlessly, as the way she had recounted it seemed almost like Kai cared for Deku.
She shrugged. “I don’t know, I just thought you should know the reason why he is mean to you, although he is always a little mean.” She laughed, then turned around and exited the classroom.
Izuku laughed bitterly as he covered his mouth with his hand. “‘Always a little mean’?...God Kacchan, I wish you were here to see this.”
---
It had been a month since Izuku started teaching the seniors at UA and there was clearly a problem. Deku had to continuously convince himself the student Kai Baishou wasn’t his dead childhood friend Bakugou Katsuki. However, said student was making it hard for Izuku to get that in his head. He couldn’t even speak to anyone about this since he was giving all his friends the cold shoulder since they colluded against him.
Both Kai and Izuku generally liked to avoid each other, neither had spoken directly to the other even for academic purposes because thankfully Kai didn’t look like he needed help in either class Izuku taught.
Izuku was more than happy to avoid any interaction that would surely mess with his brain later.
However one day he was walking out the school gates since he had some things to straighten out at the bank since his job change. He halted as he saw something that left him baffled, there stood Mitsuki Bakugou talking with Kai Baishou, someone with whom by all accounts she should have no relation.
“...o you’re really not going to tell him?” A female voice said.
“Not right now, old-” Kai stopped mid-sentence.
“A-auntie Mitsuki?” Izuku asked as he turned the corner to face them fully. “What are you doing here?” ‘with him’ was left unsaid as Deku looked at Kai.
“O-oh Izuku-kun! What a surprise to find you here, I didn’t know you taught here!” Mitsuki’s voice was squeaky as she was caught off guard.
“I was just telling the ol-uhm her that the treasury is over there.” Kai said more calmly. “She said she wanted to make a donation, that’s all…sensei.” He added as an afterthought.
“Right, yes, a donation.” Mitsuki said. “I make one every year, to make sure the kids have everything they need, you know?” She was a bad actress.
“...Ok, auntie, I can help you if you want.” Izuku said, still very much suspicious.
“Thank you so much Izuku-kun, you’re such a gentle man, unlike others.” She threw a bitter look at Kai, who rolled his eyes.
“Whatever.” Kai said before starting to walk away more briskly than strictly necessary.
“Wait Ka- Baishou!” Izuku said, unsatisfied with the interaction, sure there was something he was missing.
Mitsuki grabbed Izuku’s arm. “So, could you please help me, Izuku-kun.”
“Right, of course auntie.” Deku said, starting to lead her to the school’s treasury. “You seem to know Ka-Baishou quite well, have you met before?”
“I-I…er…I’m friends with his mom.” Mitsuki floundered. “Anyways Izuku-kun, It’s been a while since we saw each other, do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend?” She asked.
“Uhh, not right now haha, my hero work doesn’t really give me time for a relationship.” Izuku answered.
Mitsuki huffed, having successfully diverted the conversation. “But you have time to teach?” She raised an eyebrow.
“I’m technically on extended leave, healing from an injury so…”
“So you definitely have the time to look for a partner now!” Mitsuki said.
“Oh hahaha, I guess you are right.” Deku said uncomfortable.
“...Sorry Izuku-kun, I was being too pushy.” She looked away for a moment. “I just want to see you happy…you were the one closest to Katsuki, so I guess I’m projecting on you since he’s not here for me to nag.” She laughed.
“I-it’s fine auntie! I totally get it…” Izuku said quickly. “I miss him too.” They stopped in front of the treasury.
“I’m glad I’m not the only one.” Mitsuki smiled, unwrapping her arm from Izuku’s. “Thank you for helping me Izuku-kun. It’s truly a pleasure to see you again.”
“Likewise Auntie.” They turned back to their respective paths before Izuku suddenly turned around having remembered the initial reason he had walked her to the building. “Wait, auntie, I wanted to as-” She was no longer behind Deku.
Later Izuku dismissed everything as a coincidence for his own sanity.
---
Kai, more appropriately named Not-Kacchan in Izuku’s mind was driving him insane, it’s not just his appearance that resembled him, it was his way of speaking, attitude, knowledge, and even his quirk was similar to Katsuki’s, from what Deku had seen, Kai gathered energy in his hands and then threw it whereupon contact an explosion would form.
So when a villain managed to attack the school and more specifically class 3-A Izuku immediately jumped into action, with the help of Kai himself against Deku’s advice to stay with the rest of the students where one of them had made a forcefield with her quirk.
“You need to go back to safety!” Izuku screamed as he struggled with the villain, some dumbfuck who had a speed quirk and some grenades.
“Fat chance!” Kai yelled back with a ferocious grin. “Need to get real world experience, ain't that right, sensei?”
Deku wanted to respond but was hit with a grenade, although fortunately, he was able to use black whip to shield himself in time.
Suddenly the villain was airborne, and although Deku used float to catch up, the villain was, unfortunately, faster, cackling as if he had already won. Izuku gritted his teeth in frustration, wondering where the rest of the teachers were as the villain raised his hand with more grenades. A burst of explosions distracted him from continuing to track the villain down, this time instead of the grenades Kai propelled himself off the ground with an outstretched hand.
“Oi, Deku!” Kai said, the cadence and scratchiness of his voice triggering an old reflex.
Izuku caught the other man’s hand and launched him away towards the laughing villain. As Kai soared through the sky he formed a massive ball of energy and threw it at the villain's back where all the grenades were. The ensuing explosion was an immense burst of fiery oranges and yellows that moved a gust of wind and debris.
Izuku’s eyes widened in horror. “Shit shit shit!” he said as he rushed over to where the explosion was starting to calm down. “Katsu- Kai! KAI!” He looked for the student, before he emerged from the mushroom of ash and fire, unscathed but with his clothes ripped.
The pro hero rushed to catch Kai as he fell, relieved to see the younger man dirty but whole as he fell into Deku’s arms.
“That was a very stupid and reckless thing to do, Ka-Baishou!” Izuku said sternly as he returned to the ground and let the teen stand up on his own. “What were you thinking, you could have gotten seriously hurt!”
Kai buffed. “I knew I was going to be fine, my quirk makes me almost immune towards fire and explosions.” The reinforcements had arrived moments before the explosion so now they were apprehending the unconscious villain.
“Still, that is no valid re-” Deku continued to lecture until he looked down at Kai’s torso where the shirt had been torn, revealing his chest and parts of his shoulder and abdomen, Izuku stopped in his tracks.
On the exposed skin there were birthmarks that looked almost like scars, exactly where Katsuki had been. The ones on his shoulder and hip that he got while saving Izuku, the one that killed him, on the chest, and even the one on the inside of his elbow Katsuki got when climbing a tree when he was 7, were all there.
Izuku looked back at Kai, who had an indescribable expression on his face, maybe a mix of worry, disappointment, and sadness. Words escaped Deku, his mind racing, too many coincidences making connections in his mind.
Katsuki turned around and ran, and unwilling to let this go Izuku gave chase calling after him.
They ended up at an empty classroom, where finally Izuku cornered Kai, with a crazy look on his face. A very tense silence filled the space, heavy as both men looked at each other.
“Were you ever going to tell me?” Is what Izuku asked after a long silence as he paced around, his voice barely above a whisper.
Kai didn't react, but his eyes shook as if he wanted to look away but was trying hard to have no reaction. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He stated, but Izuku knew him, even after all that time
“DON'T LIE TO ME!” Deku cried, slapping his hands against his desk as he stood up to look at Katsuki with blazing eyes.
The silence buzzed in Izuku’s ears. Kai stared back with a frown, his whole body tense and still sporting the birthmarks mirroring the ones Katsuki once had.
There was a long pause before Kai spoke.
“As you know my quirk is called ‘Soul Resonance’, ironically I was a late bloomer, ” Kai’s eyes trembled even more. “I know the day I got it, August third, 20XX.”
Izuku faltered, that was the day Katsuki died.
“Apparently I, or well this body was in a coma and when I woke up not only had I “forgotten” everything about myself from before then, but I had another body’s memory, my previous body’s memories…” He trailed off.
“So you’re…” Izuku was already crying
Katsuki nodded. “I’m Bakugou Katsuki.”
Deku sobbed before becoming angry “Then why did you leave me?!” He cried “all this time you were here, why didn’t you tell me?!” he got closer to the blonde desperate.
Katsuki gritted his teeth. “I couldn’t!”
“WHY?! Why?! Do you know how m-“
“When I woke up I was 7 years old again, a child! What could I have done?!” Katsuki tried to explain himself, his eyes shining.
“I would have helped you, I could have been there for you.” Izuku’s voice cracked with emotion as tears continued to stream down his face.
“If I had met you then, you would have only seen me as a fucking kid for the rest our our lives!” Katsuki said back.
“What about your parents?! Your friends?!” Deku screeched. “What about ME?! I had to live without you for TEN years, did you even CARE-“
“I COULDN’T STAND NEXT TO YOU BEING WEAK AGAIN!” Katsuki responded fiercely. “OF COURSE I fucking cared! Don’t you dare say I didn’t!”
“I loved you!” Izuku wheezed, his voice ragged with emotion. “I’ve had to mourn you for ten fucking years!” Katsuki at this point was crying too.
“Me too, I did too.” Katsuki satiated wobbly. “I wanted you to be happy, with someone better, someone who could stand next to you because I couldn't.”
“So you really were never going to tell me, you were just going to let me live my life without ever seeing you again.” Deku said with intense sadness.
Katsuki tried to steady his emotions to make a response. “Fuck, no I-” His voice cracked a little. “I was going to try to tell you all after I graduated, I wanted to at least be a pro like you to tell you and the others.”
Silence. They both breathed heavily between sobs because of the stress of the situation.
“Right.” The older man said. “I th- I think I need to go.” Deku was too overwhelmed to continue the conversation, he felt emotionally exhausted, and so betrayed.
Katsuki didn’t stop him as he zoomed out of the classroom.
