Work Text:
It wasn't until Perry showed up that Joey had realized just how empty his life had been up until that point.
Of course he'd had the Wanderers, nothing would ever change the love he felt for the guys-- they'd gotten him through some rough times, truly.
But nothing amounted to the sudden flicker of hope, desire, meaning that came to life in his heart that fateful day. The day that everything finally set into motion. The day that, despite having begun with Turkey's stupid ass and Baldie's chasing them, led into those four words that clicked everything into place-- creating the much desired beginning to his life that hadn't been there before.
“Leave the kid alone.”
Joey had always had a feeling that something was deeply wrong in his life, but no amount of thinking or even plain acknowledgement, ever truly ripped that dust ridden cover off and revealed the truth. Though still, in the back of his mind, every interaction ever held with his father, his mother, the Del-Bombers, Richie, Buddy, hell-- even the assholes on the fifth floor that always seemed to have a problem with him, and he still never figured it out.
But those four words would soon mean everything to him. It was like wool that had been covering his eyes for years, leaving him blind to whatever truth was out there and waiting for him, had finally come off thanks to Perry. Perry who'd gotten the ball, the one precariously teetering on the edge, but never truly falling off to begin going down, rolling finally. Perry who was that missing piece to the puzzle, lost on the floor but miraculously found in a time of need. Perry that simply made it all make sense for once.
———
He didn't really know when he'd began noticing the little things that marked something being wrong, but it was at some point when he realized that his dad held little regard for him. Emilio Capra was a deeply insecure man, that hardly felt any love for his wife or son, with a one-sided vendetta and only cared for outdoing a man in a competition that had long ended two decades before.
Joey had always been the odd stain in his father's life that he could never wash out, he was too strange, not athletic enough, drew too much, didn't listen, never looked him in the eyes while speaking. Most of these culminated in either being ignored or yelled at for trivial things, though there was the rare occasion where it'd get physical-- but he hardly lingered on those memories. He simply was happy enough satiating his dad's temper long enough to get out of the apartment for the day.
And his ma, God bless her soul, had given up the fight long ago. Joey loved her, but it was apparent in her eyes that she simply couldn't bring herself to care very much anymore. Though sometimes she could nullify whatever mood his dad was in, those times were sporadic and unreliable at best.
It wasn't until he was 12 and Richie had become his friend that he'd realized how utterly fucked his family dynamic was. Richie's parents were everything his weren't-- they held a deep interest in their son's life and supported his ambitions, something Joey could only dream of happening with his family.
Though he initially envied Richie for having what he wanted, Joey found himself loving the guy like a brother the minute they became friends. He'd gone from the temperamental weird kid at school to the best friend of the one and only Richie Gennaro.
When they'd reached high school, Richie came up to him one day, talking about how he and Buddy were going to make a gang for all the Italian-American kids and wanted to know if Joey would join, he'd near instantly accepted.
Even when his parents didn't act like his family, the Wanderers sure as hell were and he was beginning to prefer them over his own blood relatives.
But despite all of that, the friendship, the brotherhood, seemingly have found a place of belonging, there was still a jagged hole in Joey's heart that he couldn't fill. Something was still missing and he still had yet to figure out what it was.
Until Perry.
———
After his dad drags him inside the apartment, he begins to spout out his regular spiel about talking outside and his ma's short-lived attempts to placate him before giving up and retiring to their bedroom. Per usual, Joey's giving half assed nods and 'uh huhs' in response when his head is suddenly jerked up and he's staring right into his father's eyes.
“How many times have I told you to look at me when I'm talking, huh? Haven't I taught you any respect?” His dad's grip on his jaw is tight and Joey wouldn't be too surprised if he ended up with finger shaped bruises on his face the next day.
As Joey stands there silently under Emilio's scrutinizing glare, he suddenly realizes that he's supposed to be responding. He opens his mouth to respond, but no matter how hard he tries to say something to appease his dad, but the words don't come and that only makes him angrier.
A sharp sting blossoms across Joey's cheek, moving his head right and almost bringing him to the ground. He looks up just in time to see his dad lowering his arm, looking satisfied with the display of strength but furious with lack of answer from his son.
“If you ain't got an answer then at least look at me and say you don't got nothing. Goddamn waste of my time, that's what you are.” Emilio scoffs, shoving Joey to the side as he walks into his makeshift weight room and lifts up a barbell.
Even after his dad has walked away, Joey has still yet to find anything to say. He simply holds a hand up to his stinging cheek and uselessly balls the other one in and out of a fist. The world has muffled itself and leaves only the loud thoughts racing through his head of what he could've done and how he should've been able to stand up to his father. That Perry wouldn't have taken any of that, he thinks bitterly, he took down several Baldies on his lonesome he would've been able to put a stop to his dad instantly.
Faintly, Joey hears his ma say from the bedroom, “Emilio, come to bed, you'll wake the neighbors.” which instantly brings back every other sound full force, a distraction from his thoughts but an assault on his ears.
In response to his ma, his dad drops the weights onto the floor before then walking to the wall and banging on it a few times before breezing past Joey, without sparing him another glance, and entering the bedroom.
After a moment, his ma pokes her head out of the bedroom-- a tired, tired look in her eyes that just says to him, 'go to bed, I'll handle him now.' With a nod and a sad frown, Joey ducked into his own room, shutting the door quietly before sinking to the floor.
Joey doesn't cry, he wouldn't, not over something like this. But he brings his head into his hands and runs his hands through the stiff, hairspray covered hair on his head. He'd been planning to shower to get all the shit out of it, but those plans were dashed now and he'd have to hope that his father would be in better mood the next evening.
He tears one hand away from his head and begins to bang it on the floor as quietly as possible, attempting to find an outlet to release all the pent up emotions he was holding in.
He stops after a minute and stands up, shrugging off his jacket before falling onto his bed face first. Exhaustion suddenly pours into his body and Joey really starts wishing that he were stronger. As he drifts, his thoughts turn to Perry and his strength... his levelheadedness... his general, all-around coolness... his...
As Joey's mind shuts off for the night, he utters a word that encompasses every thought and realization that immediately comes to fruition.
“Fuck.”
———
When Joey leaves to go to school the next morning, he finds Perry standing next to the stairs, hands in his pockets and matchstick in his mouth.
“Oh hey, Joey... yeah?” Perry says, last word sounding more of a question than anything.
Feeling much better than he had the previous evening, Joey nodded with a grin, “Mhm, hey you go to school? I'm heading there right now, shouldn't take too long to walk y'know?” It's a lie, he woke up late and knows that by the time he gets there first period will have already started.
Perry doesn't answer the question immediately, though it looks like he's about to when yelling starts up behind Joey's apartment door. He wants to shrink into himself, embarrassed that his dad's already started up this early in the morning.
Instead of doing that though, he glances behind him towards the door to his appartment, lowering his voice as he turns back to respond to Perry-- trying to keep cool to show that he's stronger than he looks. “Yeah, dad's kind of an asshole.” Perry raises an eyebrow at that, but blessedly didn't say anything.
Rather, Perry asks, “Want a ride?” as he holds up car keys with a slight grin.
It takes all of Joey's control to not begin jumping with excitement.
———
“This your car, man?” Joey asks, whistling as he walks towards the passenger side of the vehicle. It's beautiful really, if he had a license he'd definitely drive something like it.
Perry shakes his head as he opens the door, “Nah, it's my mom's.”
“Ain't nothing wrong with that, tell her it's a beauty.” He sinks into the seat and takes it in, it's a damn fine car, that's for sure.
“Yeah, yeah, I'll tell her.” Perry starts the ignition and pulls out of the parking space. “You gonna tell me how to get there? I don't exactly know the area yet, y'know?”
“Shit, I got you give me a second,” he sputters, completely forgetting that Perry was new. He leans forward to look out the windshield, “turn right up there and keep going 'til I say otherwise.”
“'Kay.” is Perry's only response before he focuses back onto the road.
A song he likes begins playing, and he hardly thinks before beginning to tap out the beat with his fingers on his knee. Perry glances over at the movement, but doesn't comment and returns to focusing on the road ahead. Joey looks over into his window and smiles to himself. He's starting to like Perry more and more by the minute.
———
Before he meets up with Richie after the final bell has rung to collect all the Wanderers, Joey to track down Perry to see if he's given joining any more thought.
Joey spots Perry leaving a classroom and runs to catch up with him.
“Hey... hey!” He's barely checked to make sure he's actually being listened to before beginning to talk, “You thought about it any more?”
Perry looks confused for a second, but quickly replies, “Nah, not yet. Give me another day or something. Tonight if I see you in the hall, yeah?”
Joey nods as Perry throws a grin towards him before walking off. Strangely enough, he's kind of hoping they'll end up running into each other later.
When he, Richie, and Buddy head out to gather everyone, Joey decidedly ignores Buddy's insistence on him looking 'distracted' and questioning 'who's the lucky girl?'
There isn't a lucky anyone because there's no one to be in love with.
———
He's completely dejected by the time he gets back to his apartment building. They'd completely failed to rally a single gang to join their fight again the D-Bombers. They were getting their asses beat for sure.
When he exits the elevator on the fourth floor, he's surprised to see Perry leaning against the wall across from where the door opens.
It's possible Joey let out a shrill scream at the sudden surprise he feels at noticing him, but that's between himself, Perry, and whatever asshole yells at him to shut up from another room.
Perry stands up straight, shifting the matchstick from one aide of his mouth to the other as he walks over to Joey. His voice is low as he talks, “Thought about it, figure I might as well do something while I'm here. Ain't no gangs in Trenton, could be an experience.”
“Really? Shit, I'll talk to Richie-- did you know his ma makes our jackets? I'll get him to ask her to get you one. Oh man you ain't gonna regret this. Oh shit, you're good in a rumble right? We need a good fighter like you if we're going to make it out alive...” His voice starts out in a whisper, mindful that his dad is probably still awake and will hear him if he's too loud. But as the reality that Perry's really joining them sets in Joey's getting louder and more excited by the minute, volume rising as he says any words that come to mind, and it isn't until he's bouncing on the balls of his feet that he thinks to tone it down before his dad catches him talking in the hallway.
Thankfully, Perry just pats Joey on the shoulder and huffs out a laugh, “See you in the morning, Joe.” He squeaks out what might've been a reply, but he's far too excited to know for sure.
As Perry enters his apartment, Joey walks towards his own and begins to quietly open the door, aware that it's late and his father probably wouldn't take too kindly to being out so late.
Thankfully, all the lights are out in the living room, so he exhales quickly before going into his bedroom and laying down. Life was looking up and he wasn't going to complain about it.
———
Knowing that Chubby fucking Galasso and his brothers are now involved in the Wanderers and Del-Bombers business is still shocking even after having Richie repeat it to him several times.
He'd figure that someday Richie would involve his girlfriend's dad in something that they're doing, but he really hadn't expected him to get in the middle of their fight (not that he wasn't grateful for an excuse to get out of fighting; Joey's a much better football player than he is a fighter).
When he tells Perry the news while they're walking down the street, he merely shrugs and says “Don't know him, he supposed to be important?” and Joey finds himself agape at the idea that there's someone who hadn't heard of the Galasso's.
“Holy shit, man!” He looks around immediately after exclaiming it, suddenly concious of all the people walking around them, he lowers his voice and turns back to Perry. “You can't just say that-- the Galasso brothers are some of the most powerful motherfuckers in the Bronx, you- you just can't say that kind of shit man, you never know who's out here listening.”
“'Kay, Okay, I won't say nothing,” Perry agrees, “lips are sealed.”
“Yeah they better be, I ain't gonna be the one to scrape you off the sidewalk once they deal with you. Gotta find someone else to do that shit, man.” Joey laughs.
“So that Galasso guy though, you're telling me that his daughter is the same chick that Richie's with?” His friend asks.
Joey nods, “Yeah, trust me, it ain't anything anyone envies Rich for. Despie's great though, just gotta be careful 'cuz if you make one wrong move around her Chubby'll be on your ass about it before you even know it.”
Perry shrugs and Joey's about to get onto him again about not caring for his livelihood when he then says, “Not like I'll be making moves with her anyways.”
As they keep walking, Joey can't help but wonder what exactly he means by that.
———
He starts feeling sick while he's waiting in the emergency room because he's stuck thinking about how he might finally have a chance with someone despite Perry having just had his fucking arm broken by a Ducky Boy. But when he thinks about Nina, his heart starts racing and he feels breathless. Joey's heart only races faster and fills entirely with shame as his friend exits the examination room though, his arm wrapped up and in a sling.
Buddy and Richie had already headed home, their apartments being within reasonable walking distance from where they were.
Perry notices him sitting there and smiles faintly, Joey leaps up from his seat and walks over to him. “Hey man, you doing alright? It hurt or anything? God I've broken my arm before-- hurt like a bitch.” His hands hover over Perry hesitantly, not too sure he can or should be doing.
Looking thoughtful for a moment and glancing at his arm, “Ain't too bad, could've been a whole lot worse. You got my keys?”
“Yeah, yeah I do,” Joey nods fervently as he goes to hand them to Perry, Buddy handed them to him before leaving, “you can uh, can you drive like that?”
“Eh,” Perry shrugs, “probably not, you wanna?”
“You sure? I ain't got my license or nothing, I don't want to mess up your ma's car, man.” Joey waves his hands.
“If you do, I know where to find you,” Perry says with an intense look before it then cracks into a grin, he pats Joey on the back before starting to walk, “c'mon, I'm sick of being in this place.”
The drive home is easy, Joey stresses the whole way back, unsure if he's even driving right, but they both make it back in one piece so it's fine.
The elevators out when they get to the apartment and Joey feels an impending sense of doom as he and Perry go up the stairs. He knows his dad will be angry at him for being home late, but it's not like he can fix it now.
Perry's worried about his mother and what she'll think of the whole situation, but Joey can't bring himself to fully care when he hears a door closing upstairs. He quickly tells Perry that he'll check it out and goes up quietly. What Joey finds is something he hopes is just a cruel misunderstanding, as he walks back down to get Perry he's hoping terribly hard that his dad was visting Perry's ma for reasons that he really hopes aren't the ones that he's thinking.
He doesn't tell Perry.
The look on his face when he meets back with his friend is obviously not a good one, Perry asks him what the matter is and he really can't bring himself to say it.
Thankfully, he's saved by his dad coming out of their apartment saying something about a phonecall, and it's the one time he'll ever feep grateful towards his dad. He looks towards Perry and mouths a goodnight as he enters his home, dodging his father's raised hand as he does so.
His troubles are forgotten by the time he reaches the phone-- Nina remembered him!
———
Joey thinks he might be in love with Nina.
Though, the one issue that he finds with it is that despite his brain telling him that he most definitely is, his heart disagrees and can barely conjure up any feelings for her. He tells himself that it's because they've barely talked so far and he hardly knows her, but the aching feeling in his chest stubbornly remains as he and Richie wait for her to pick them up.
He agonized over what he was going to wear to the party, still is-- he's starting to feel like he should've picked a different suit, but Richie's already assured him several times that it's fine and who is he do doubt his best friend's opinion?
By the Nina's car pulls up to the curb, he's excited. The way that she looks at him puts a grin on his face and it's starting to feel like she's the one. But the emptiness in his heart stays despite those thoughts.
———
After chasing down Despie, he goes into the living room where he finds everyone slow dancing with one another. He spots Perry standing by himself and goes over to him. As he reaches his friend, a girl that looks a little more than tipsy comes over to them and says to Perry, “Oh good, you got a partner! C'mon, you gotta get to dancin'!”
Joey looks over to Perry, who just shrugs in return. He's not too good at dancing, but Perry offers him an easy solution.
While they dance, Joey's heart starts to race and he's thinking it's because if Nina were here, they'd be slow dancing together like he said they would at the beginning of the party. She isn't , but Joey finds that dancing (if he can really call it that, Perry's doing all the work and Joey's just hanging on) with Perry isn't as bad as he'd initially thought. He accounts the sudden breathlessness he feels up to just being a remnant of the giddiness he was feeling while playing strip poker upstairs with Nina, Richie, and Despie. Still, he's content with dancing with Perry.
He doesn't realize Richie's gone missing until he hears Despie asking around the party for him, a knot forms in his stomach but it's quickly forgotten when Turkey bursts through the door, Baldies jacket on and extremely drunk.
He's no match for Perry who runs up the moment the little prick grabs Despie and knocks him flat on his ass. Joey follows behind Perry as Turkey gets up and runs outside, yelling for backup that wouldn't ever arrive because the moment the entire party's out the door, the sound of screeching tires alerts everyone that the Baldies have abandoned their newest and most insignificant member.
As he watches Turkey run away, he looks down. Joey hadn't even realized that he was standing in front of Nina's car until he looked down.
Any hopes he'd had of being with Nina fall to pieces immediately the second he does so. Joey's entire demeanor of victory after watching Turkey's traitorous ass get kicked crumble the moment he looks down.
Nina and Richie stare up at him.
Nina doesn't look guilty-- she hardly knows him, it's a reasonable reaction because now that Joey thinks about it, he was never the object of attraction, she was never after him in the first place. Those looks in the car he figured were for him because she felt that 'true love' too were and had always just been for Richie.
Richie's look on the other hand, is a different story. The guy that singlehandedly made his life a little more worth living years ago was now staring up at him with a dumbfounded look on his face, as if he didn't know what he was doing alone in the car with Joey's date. Richie's betrayal hurts him badly. So bad that he can't even bring himself to say anything as he stares.
Eventually, his feet start moving and he's walking away from the Galasso's house, away from Richie, away from his heart that shattered right there on the sidewalk.
Richie, the asshole, follows right after him, spouting apologies Joey doesn't process and attempts to grab him so he can turn around so he can explain why he just ruined everything they'd ever had, and it isn't until his best friend is on the floor that he realizes that he really can't handle being near anyone right now.
So he yells, he tells him to get his fucking hands off and and turns away from everyone. Joey nearly starts running down the street, no clue where he's headed but somewhere that isn't right there.
Eventually, he staggers to a stop and leans against the side of a building, breathing heavily as he sinks to the floor. He reaches up for his hair and starts pulling at it, Joey distantly finds it funny that not even four hours ago he'd been worried about it getting messed up. Still, the pain of trying to rip out his own hair is sharp, but it blocks out the waves of heartache he can feel pulsating through his entire being.
Out of all the things he thought could've happened to him in his life, he never thought that his best friend-- the one who'd accepted his eccentricities and taken him under his week all those years ago --would go and pull something like this. Something so awful, something so fucking stupid. Joey thought for once he could have one thing of his own.
He'd never truly gotten over the jealousy he had of Richie, he'd simply just shoved it down and buried it. His best friend had parents that cared, he'd never been bullied for being himself, he had a nice girlfriend that really did love him (though apparently he didn't love her enough back to not cheat on her). Richie had everything Joey had always wished he had and he'd gone and brushed it all off as if it were nothing.
Joey lowers himself to the ground and puts his head into the hand that isn't occupied with tearing out his hair. He could handle Turkey's betrayal, they hadn't known each other for a long time and Joey had always knows how flakey his former friend had been since the get-go, but Richie's was just something he couldn't fathom.
He'd never wanted to cry more than right now, but his eyes remain dry and that only upsets him more. He wants to scream so badly and he just can't.
Footsteps approach and Joey thinks it's probably just someone out late, but whoever it is stops right in front of him. After a moment of staying still, he goes to look up and tell them to fuck off, but when he does he's met with Perry.
His friend stands there, looking down at him with an expression he can't really decipher. It looks vaguely pissed off, but something tells Joey that it's not directed at him.
“Thought I wouldn't find you, kinda dark out here, yeah? Walked further than I thought you had.” Perry says with a quiet laugh. Joey can only bring himself to groan and give him a wobbly smile, though he's touched by the idea that someone came looking for him.
“You gonna get up? Sidewalk can't be too comfy.” Perry sticks out his good arm for Joey to grab, which he does greatfully, miserably nodding as he did so-- the sidewalk was so hard he probably wouldn't be able to feel his ass for a week.
“I parked the car up here, you wanna head home?” Joey replies with a short nod, unsure if he could even bring himself to say anything in his current state. Perry doesn't seem put off by his uncharacteristic silence though, he simply fills it with meaningless chatter (it means everything to Joey though).
As they get in the car he still thinks is as beautiful as it was the first time he saw it, Joey looks over at Perry who's starting the vehicle. His friend is illuminated simply by the streetlights behind him, and as Joey watches his pull out of the parking spot, he thinks back to everything Perry's done for him since they've met. Perry saving him from getting pummled to death by Baldies, giving him rides to school everyday, showing him the same kindness that Richie had when they first met, listening to Joey talk even though he knows that it gets grating to listen to after a while, just being there.
His heart beats fast in his chest and Joey holds a hand up to it, the beating of his heart reminds him of how he felt when he was waiting for Perry at the emergency room the day he met Nina or how he felt when dancing at the party and how he could feel himself becoming whole and- oh.
It's right then when he realizes that Nina was never the one that Joey felt something for.
It was Perry.
———
He's still reeling with the knowledge of his newfound love for Perry and hatred for Richie when he finds out about Turkey's death on Sunday, the day after. His ma delivers the news to him while he's in living room, painting on the banner that's getting close to being finished. He nearly drops his paintbrush as he looks up to see if she's kidding.
She's not.
Joey might not have been as close to Turkey as he had been with Buddy or Richie, but he still cared for the guy in the short amount of time they'd been friends.
He puts his paints down and goes to call Buddy and see if he'd already heard about it.
———
Monday is even rougher on Joey because now he's sitting in the same car, only a foot apart, from Perry-- who he's not even sure could even reciprocate the kind of feelings that he's holding right now.
He's quiet on the ride to school, and when Perry asks him what's wrong he just blames it on Richie.
Luckily for him, Perry accepts it and throws a grin his way as he says “Don't worry about him, you're still standing, ain't you?”
Everyone at school does too and for once, Mr. Sharps class is blessedly silent. Joey hopes that Richie is learning something from this.
———
The football game is going horribly.
The one time his dad actually comes out to see his son make him proud for once and they're fucking it up.
The Wanderers were really no match for the Del-Bombers.
The only encouragement he really feels is knowing that Perry is watching from the sidelines, but he's sure that if his arm weren't broken they'd be kicking ass on the field for sure.
It's when Richie comes out of nowhere, asking for forgiveness for what he's done that really splits Joey into two.
On one hand, he really needs to show his dad he's not a disappointment. On the other, he's still upset at Richie and wants to express that.
Then, Richie tells him so earnestly that it's 'Wanderer's forever' that Joey realizes that whatever happened with Nina was forgotten. Richie realized just how fucking badly he fucked up and was paying for it in multiple ways already, he was going to fix everything.
From there, it goes up. They're winning and it looked like it was going to stay that way.
Joey looks into the stands, spotting his father-- who's scowling at the field (and Joey) despite the sudden turnaround. So instead he looks to find Perry, who looks happy as he watches the game play out, and he even nods at Joey as he runs by.
It doesn't take too long until things go downhill though.
Out of nowhere, the Ducky Boys appear and begin multiplying, and before anyone knows it there's hundreds of them charging at the field.
The whole fight is a blur, Joey isn't one for combat in general, but he's fast and can throw a punch if needed. He catches glimpses of his dad and Perry each taking out a multitude of Ducky Boys and he's pretty sure he downs a few of them himself before he's brought down to the ground.
By the time the fights over he feels like he's been hit by a bus or two, but Perry helps him up again in a way that reminds him of the other night. Joey spots his dad nearby and looks up at Perry, telling him he'll be right back. He needs to show this victory to his dad, show that he isn't weak and that he can be a son that Emilio can be proud of.
Realistically, Joey has had years of practice, knowledge, and bruises to know that once his dad's in competition mode it's hard to snap him out of that state of mind. But he'd been hoping that for once, maybe just once, this time would be different. He runs for his dad, happy that he's finally a winner, when Emilio decks him right in the stomach.
It's as Joey falls to the ground that he realizes just how pointless all of it had been. His father didn't care about him and never would. In his eyes, he'd still be the small, strange kid that'd gotten bullied and he'd never be anything different no matter how many years passed. Every hope Joey held of earning his father's praise or love or anything disappeared, not even shattering or leaving behind a physical trace of what had been. He would never feel the same way towards him ever again.
The field clears and Joey still lies there, staring only at the ripped and tatteded banner he'd spent so long making and finding a sort of irony in it all even as Perry helps him back up and walks with him to the car.
On the way home he has a revelation.
“I ain't going back there. I ain't going home,” he whispers to himself.
———
He uses Perry's phone at his apartment to call his mother, he makes up a lie about being out for the night and distantly wishes he'd be able to see her again. She never really loved him-- she probably hadn't felt any kind of true love for years --but she cared in her own kind of way that meant a lot more than whatever Emilio could've ever shown.
Joey's glad Perry is letting him sleep over. He insists that his ma is okay with it even if she isn't home. Joey feels bad because he knows that she isn't well, though that turns out to be even more true when Perry reveals that she's gone to some kind of hospital and probably will be there a long time. He feels even sorrier when finding that out, he knows Perry cares for his mother in some kind of capacity.
When Perry says he's leaving, Joey thinks his heart stops for a moment. He can't imagine one of his now closest friends leaving before he can even express what exactly he feels for him are. He can feel the piece that completed him trying to escape and Joey determines right there that he can't let it happen. He can't let this go. Not when he finally feels whole.
So when Perry then says he might head down to California, Joey declares he wants to come to. There's almost nothing left in the Bronx for him anyways. The only thing tying him down at this point is the Wanderers and he knows that soon enough everyone will graduate and Richie will be busy playing house with Despie and there won't really be a point to them existing anymore.
He's almost disheartened by Perry claiming he travels alone, but he doesn't let up. They get into joking, but Joey's worried Perry's found out what secret he's harboring and shuts it down, turning away and clutching the bottle of Tango he'd been holding to his chest.
“Perry, I'm scared,” he says suddenly, he doesn't specify about what, leaving it up to his friend's interpretation.
Perry's reaction surprises him, he wasn't sure what he was expecting. “Hey, what's wrong with that?”
“What do you mean?” Joey isn't sure, did Perry know? Or were they really on different wavelengths. He hears Perry sit up, so he turns around to face him.
“Joey, do me a favor. If we travel together, you have to promise not to be an asshole.” And Joey beams. “We'll take off right after the bachelor party for Richie.” He could feel everything falling into place, where it was supposed to be.
Until his dad ruins it. Joey knew that what he'd seen happening between Emilio and Perry's mother would come back to bite him, but it's too late to do anything, so now they're going to face the consequences.
Perry unlocks the apartment door and he's faced with the man he'd been hoping never to see again. He feels small compared to his father and it doesn't help that he now knows Joey had lies about where he was. The only thing he can do is weakly tell him to leave him alone. He doesn't. But Perry tries to help.
Instead, Emilio turns onto Perry and starts taunting him. Joey's scared his dad will take it too far and he tries to warn Perry, but he's learned that neither will go down without a fight and he's terrified when his father has his friend in a chokehold with his broken arm pinned behind him. Joey panicks and grabs the nearest thing to him, the Tango bottle, and brings it down onto his father's head.
Emilio crumples to the floor and Joey thinks he might've just killed his dad. He doesn't know what to do other than to leave and Perry follows, grabbing the suitcase filled half-hazardly and tells him to get to the car.
They shove everything into the truck and decide to make an early arrival to Richie's party-- it'd be the last time Joey would ever see his best friend for a while anyways... might as well make it count.
———
Saying goodbye is probably the hardest thing he's ever had to do.
When he sees Richie turn the corner and spot them where they wait beside Perry's car, the waterworks have already started. Joey finds himself bawling like an infant and he finds a little peace in it.
He knows Richie is confused at the vague way they say that they're leaving, but Joey knows that if he says anything further he'll probably be able to be talked down from it. But he doesn't want to stay, leaving is the only way that anything can happen. Leaving will fully fill in the cracks between what was there, and what was found in his heart. This is the only way.
Joey tries his best to tell Richie how much he loves him for being his closest and best friend for so long, for sticking by him all that time. He wants to wish him the best life he can possibly have, but the words get stuck and he's distracted by Peewee who he suddenly spots in his peripheral.
She's looking into the party and he's worried that she's going to try and ruin it-- that the Baldies will appear any moment to ruin the one last good thing Joey will be able to remember of the Wanderers and he realizes he can't let that happen.
They both end up on the ground and when he looks at her truly, he realizes that she's had everything she knew and cared for taken from her without a second trace. He realizes her that she needs someone just as bad as he did and she doesn't have anyone to lean on.
Peewee's a tough mother and nothing will keep her down. When she tells him that none of the Baldies even bothered to leave her no card anything he decides right there that he will. When he and Perry reach California, he'll send her a card and he can be that someone to have.
Perry calls for him to leave and he gets up, but not without Richie trying to figure out where they're headed. He doesn't tell him, as much as he wishes he could, and reminds him: “Wanderers forever” before the car drives off.
He can faintly hear Richie yelling after him, but he turns towards Perry and grins as the radio starts playing Dion's 'The Wanderer.' It doesn't matter where he is, he knows that the Wanderers will always have a spot in his heart-- right next to where Perry's spot is.
———
When they arrive in San Francisco after a week, Joey's practically filled to the brim with excitement and anxiety.
He's sat wondering for days on how exactly he's going to let Perry know what he's been holding onto for the better part of two weeks now.
It comes as they're parked at a drive-in movie, sitting on the hood of the car and watching the beginning credits roll as the sun sets in the sky behind the screen.
“Hey... Perry,” Joey says, hands shaking as he prepares to do what could make or break everything they have.
Perry turns to look at him, curiosity painted on his face as he shifts the matchstick in his mouth. “Yeah, Joe?”
“I've been wanting to say this- uh, I mean do this, ah fuck- I wanted-” His stammering is cut off by Perry spitting out his matchstick and leaning forward to kiss him.
When Perry sits back he laughs, “Man, sometimes you just gotta go for it, y'know?”
Joey grins brightly and leans in to meet Perry's lips again.
His so-called empty life felt as if it were bursting with color now and Joey couldn't help but feel a meaning to it all.