Chapter Text
It’s raining, and Zayn thinks it’s the perfect weather to describe the way he’s feeling: gloomy and dark; the color in his life has escaped from him. Everyone has their raincoats on, or they’re tucked underneath an umbrella, warm and dry. Zayn’s the only one who takes the rain as it pours on top of him; he’s wet and cold, and he has this horrible hollow feeling inside that’s been nagging at him since the day he got the dreaded phone call.
He remembers that day so clearly. That day when Liam had gone to the grocery store, promising to come back and kissing Zayn before leaving. That day when Zayn waited hours on end for Liam to return, come busting through their front door, and apologize for being late. That day when he received a phone call from a man telling him there had been an accident and that he needed to get to the hospital. That day when the police told him it was an armed robbery, and Liam was trying to be a hero. That day when the doctors told him there was nothing else they could do. That day when Zayn’s world came to a halt even though everyone else’s was continuing just fine. That day when Zayn stopped being happy, stopped being anything.
Now all Zayn can do is watch from the sidelines as Liam’s ‘closest family’ speak about him; the same family that demanded he leave the house when Liam came out; the same ones who hadn’t contacted him in years.
“Liam was always so happy—”
You don’t know about the nights he cried over you.
“We loved him so much—”
He was my whole world.
“It’s so sad that he had to leave us so soon—”
I want him back. I need him back.
Zayn could feel every ounce of himself leave as he watched them lower the casket. All that’s left behind is an empty shell of what Zayn once was. Louis, his and Liam’s friend, comes up to him and offers some of his umbrella. Zayn merely stares at him until Louis sighs and pats him on his back, telling him to ‘take care’. There’s nothing left to take care of; he’s empty. He’s nothing.
And all Zayn can do now is sit in their once shared home - a puddle forming on the ground from his wet body and tux, the same tuxedo he wore when he met Liam at Niall’s friend's engagement party, the same tuxedo he would never wear again - and wonder how he’s going to be able to continue after this, how he’s going to be able to cope.