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"...my point is, the jeep's purring like a kitten now, and Komaeda? Y'know what he said?"
Kazuichi gestures wildly with his hands. Gundham hums in acknowledgement for must be the twentieth time. He usually does when Kazuichi rants like this.
"Well, Souda-kun, why did you fix it when you can't drive it?"
He claps his hands together, parroting Nagito's wheezy speech. "Why wouldn't I?! Now we have a jeep! Hinata can get the supplies on it so we don't have to carry all that shit back to the restaurant all the time!"
Gundham hums again. "I would not think the preacher of hope harbored any ill meaning with his denouncement. Personally, I'd prefer a dark carriage pulled by the loyal steeds of the apocalypse, but I suppose we have to be thankful of what we own at hand."
Kazuichi squints at him. "Are you makin' fun off me?"
"I do not."
They arrive at Gundham's cottage, and Kazuichi lets out a long sigh, burying his fingers in his hair. "I just wanna be useful. I don't want people to see me and the first thing they connect to me is oh, Souda, the creep! I wanna be better now..."
He follows Gundham into the cottage. He has never invited Kazuichi inside before, but has met up as his own several times. He doesn't seem to mind, when he's usually kind of flighty about letting people inside. Which Kazuichi doesn't really get. His cottage is tidy, except the furniture his hamsters have chewed on.
Gundham huffs. "I must say I do note your efforts, tamer of wires", he says, grabbing the edge of the desk with his bandaged hand to let his hamsters down. They scurry down, into the cardboard box filled with hay on the edge of it.
"Really?" Kazuichi bites down a smirk. It's not as surprising as he acts. Gundham and he weren't exactly friends in the simulation. Now he'd dare to say they get along fairly well. Every day a bit better.
"Indeed. And, I have decided that you deserve a gesture of acknowledgement."
"Eh?"
Before Kazuichi has any chance to even think about what he could mean, Gundham is right in front of him. His piercing heterochromatic eyes fixed on him, Kazuichi takes a step backwards and hits the wall. "Uh..."
Gundham slams his hand against the wall next to his face, leaning in close. "Do tell. Do you harbor sexual desire towards me?"
Kazuichi stares. Stares, and feels his face heat up immediately. Of course. Gundham is blunt and forward and not one for awkward flirting. He should have seen this one coming... if he had allowed himself to think he had any sort of chance with the guy.
"Wh-wh-what the hell man? I-I'm not, I-"
"No false shyness. I would proclaim our bond has deepened enough to merit unison."
"U-uni-"
Gundham pulls back. "Unless I have been misinterpreting your signals, in which case I must apologize."
"No!" Kazuichi reaches out and grabs his scarf. "I, uh... I'm just... Uh..." He figures words won't cut it. So instead, he pulls Gundham back towards him. Feels his breath ghost over his skin as he brings their faces closely together. His scent envelops him, reminds him how crazy he manages to drive him at times.
Their lips are just a hair apart, before Kazuichi takes a deep breath and kisses him. Gundham returns the gesture with vigor, hungrily pressing Kazuichi against the wall. His legs part, knees against the wall, starting to grind himself against him. A moan slips past Kazuichi's teeth and his knees nearly give out.
Gundham leans back, his other hand coming up under Kazuichi's chin, tilting his head up. "Is it safe to assume you desire intercourse as much as I do myself?"
His head swims. He feels the blood rush inside his ears and an itch down beyond his belt. "Just say you want to fuck, man", he groans. Gundham huffs, but Kazuichi would argue he sees a smirk playing his lips. "Very well. I implore you to rid yourself of your textile prison, so we can proceed."
He can be so glad he's hot. Kazuichi hardly understands what he means, but he finds it doesn't really matter. With shaky fingers, he opens the belt of his work pants and kicks them off. Gundham looks at him, hand curled under his chin, thumb tapping against the edge of his mouth.
Kazuichi looks down on himself. And of course, today he's wearing the bright neon pink and yellow boxers like some kind of idiot. It's not that he plans on having sex every day, but that's just... embarrassing. "C'mon man, it's not like yours are gonna be any bet-"
He glances up at hearing the rustling of fabric, and... Gundham is standing there, dick out and all, with no underwear to be seen.
"Where are they...?"
"Where is who?"
Kazuichi gestures at his half erect dick. "Your-your, are you kidding me? Do you not wear anything under?"
Gundham smiles self assured, brushing his fingers over his face to strike a pose. "I have no use for undergarments. They are merely restricting my movement."
"B-but your-- doesn't your jolly just go around dangling?!"
"My-" Gundham frowns. "I beg your pardon. The lochness monster may only dance once the whistle is blown."
Kazuichi balks. Swallows hard. Nods.
"Y'know what, 'course it does. Whatever."
He shakes his head. Gundham just keeps getting more confusing.
"In any case, place yourself on the throne. I shall commence preparing entrance into your darkened halls at once."
Kazuichi trips over the edge of the carpet, dragging off his boxers. "My-what the fuck man?" He fakes a sob and tries not to laugh.
Gundham rummages through his desk and turns to him, sitting on the armchair as instructed. He gives him a disapproving grunt. "You must grant me access, for you shall not want to be burned by my flaming sword, I presume?" Kazuichi gulps audibly. "You didn't eat curry, right?"
He doesn't look very amused about that question. Not knowing what else to do, Kazuichi turns around, his arms crossed over the backrest. Gundham kneels down behind him. There's a squishing noise. His bandaged hand firmly grasps his ass, stroking him. Kazuichi presses his face into the backrest, groaning. He's good at what he's doing.
His other hand comes up, cold against his hole. Fingers circle around it, and he can feel him lean close. He's not sure if he's into rimming, and near panics before Gundham whispers: "Open Sesame."
He bites into fabric. He's not sure if he's joking, but just in case he isn't, he doesn't really want to piss him off with laughing.
"I jest." Gundham presses his finger against him. Kazuichi sucks in a breath as it slips inside. It feels a bit weird, having someone else touch him like that, but Gundham is slow and careful despite is usual boisterous nature. He tests and stretches, slowly moves in and out, another finger joins.
A tear runs over Kazuichi's face, his teeth are probably going to leave a mark on the armchair. He's not even hitting any spots and it feels far too good.
"It appears you are prepared to be sieged."
Gundham pulls away. He rustles around, Kazuichi assumes cleans off his hand, before he steps into his peripheral vision. "Rise up now."
Kazuichi assumes they may be moving to the bed. He's wrong. Gundham settles himself on the armchair, patting his bare thighs. "Climb the throne, if you may."
He's not really sure what's more ridiculous. Gundham sitting there, obviously way more into this whole thing than he lets on, or the fact his strange proposal conjures an image of a Gundham dressed as Santa with a long white beard and... - Kazuichi shakes his head to chase the cursed mental image away. "Er... I've never..."
"Do trust. I shall not commence, should it be unpleasant, but I assure, it will be to your liking." Kazuichi blinks back at him. "Sounds like yer talking from experience-- Actually, don't answer that." He pulls his shirt off as well, thinking it may be better to do that now than later.
He makes his way over and feels a little awkward. Gundham doesn't seem to mind. "An idle sword lodged upon a stone has waited years and years in patience to be pulled." Kazuichi grunts. He gets what he's saying, but does he have to say it like that?!
He climbs into Gundham's lap and for once, he's thankful he joined Nekomaru's workout training at least a couple times. Letting himself down slowly puts a lot of pressure on his spread legs, and he gasps when he feels Gundham push into him. Grimacing, he pauses, forces himself to breathe. Adjusts a little to the sensation, before it stops feeling odd.
Releasing another gasp, he fully takes him in. Gundham wraps his arms around his body, his lips tracing Kazuichi's spine. The edges of his teeth scrape over his skin and cause him to shiver. "F-fuck... Could nearly think you planned for this."
"Perhaps."
His hands settle around his thighs. His grip is strong. Stronger than Kazuichi would have guessed. He easily lifts him up, arches his body along, before letting him down on his dick again. Kazuichi feels a surge rock his entire body, his own erection pathetically leaking. He bites his lip, careful not to draw blood.
He's been lusting after this moment for so long, he doesn't want it to be over in just a minute. Gundham readjusts his grip on him, sinking a bit deeper into the seat for more space. "I will do the work. I have proclaimed it shall be a treat to you, so let go."
Kazuichi leans back against him and relaxes. The leather of his jacket is hot against his bare back. How does he not die in that in the heat? Why wouldn't he fucking undress for sex anyways?
Sighing, he feels his mind turn static. Maybe he's really just been horny and that's why he'd been so irritated. Jerking off after a long exhausting work day just doesn't hit the spot like this.
Gundham pushes him up again, arching himself up to meet Kazuichi halfway, before letting him down on himself again. A gurgling moan slips past Kazuichi's tongue, his jaw hanging open. Each time Gundham pushes him back down, a new wave of ecstasy shoots up his whole body, making his mind pleasantly fuzzy. A thin line of drool runs past his lips, but he doesn't really care about that right now.
"Fuck... Ah... Tana-- Fuck! God. I'm close... Fuck."
Not in his wildest dreams would he have imagined Gundham of all people fucking him to take the edge off, and him being so ridiculously good at it too. For all the nonsense he spews, he knows how to move his body.
"Has your third eye opened?" Gundham lets him down, both of them slumping down into the seat. Kazuichi hisses, taking in his full length. "My- hah. My third eye is about to spill."
"Very well." He leans forward, wraps one arm around Kazuichi's chest, the other around his begging dick.
"Fuck! A warning maybe?!" His hips jerk into his hand, but Gundham only notes it with a huff. He starts running his warm palm up and down, while his other hand tugs at his nipple. Kazuichi's head falls back, a guttural moan emerging from the depths of his throat. He rocks himself into Gundham's hand, feels his climax build up rapidly. His thoughts blank, a scream replacing his moan, his legs trembling, pushing himself up and back down on Gundham's cock, then again. Feels his hands going slack, sagging into the armchair, a traitorous hot pressure filling him.
Gasping, Kazuichi comes down from his high and rolls himself off his partner's softening dick. Gundham is panting, covered in sweat, his eyes closed and his make up running. Kazuichi bathes in the sight, his scent and the way his lips hint a grin.
"That was..." He runs a hand through his hair. "Fucking great."
Gundham cracks one eye open. "Is that so?" He huffs. "A dark lord never lets his underling down."
"Since when am I your underling?"
His other eye slowly opens, big and owlishly, sharp like a hawk. Gundham curls his bandaged finger under Kazuichi's chin, and like he's floating on it, he lets it beckong him closer until Gundham captures his lips in a kiss. "There is only so long a dark overlord can deny undeniable attraction, even to a lowly mortal such as yourself."
"Do yer really have to say that after railing me?"
Gundham digs his teeth into Kazuichi's lip and tugs them down. "Is that not why you're here, bathing in my otherworldly presence?"
He presses out a laugh. His throat feels raw. "Tchk. Self centered idiot." He leans in to kiss him again and wonders if Gundham would grant him audience for other endeavors as well. That's one way to get him to work even harder, he guesses.