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English
Series:
Part 3 of The life of the irresistibly oblivious Stiles
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Published:
2015-11-17
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1,691
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1/1
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Ugh - they’re perfect

Summary:

Our naively irresistible Stiles turning down all offers of 'help' in the supermarket.

Maybe they just needed to try a more hands on approach?

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

 

***

 

“There is a man in the produce section acting in a completely inappropriate manner,” Emma hisses to Ben, her best friend and the current acting assistant manager.

“What?” Ben squawks, startled by her sudden entrance. Damnit, he’d been working solidly for the last hour and had finally found a grove, powering through the rosters that had to be finished by tomorrow. The meaning of her words finally filters through though and he sighs gustily, “Ugh. Go tell security; I don’t want to deal with a pervert anymore than you do.”

“What?” Emma queries, head tilting to the side in apparent confusion.

“Go tell security about the pervert?” Ben repeats, his order turning into a question as she continues to look at him blankly.

“Wait, what pervert are you talking about?” Emma asks, “We have a pervert in the store again?!”

“Emma,” Ben starts, starting to feel concerned, maybe they should cancel their movie marathon tonight if customer service had fried her brain this much, “You literally just told me there was someone being a creep in produce.”

“What? No!” Emma laughs, “He’s not a creep; he’s just making everyone else want to be a creep!”

Dropping his head into his hands and rubbing at his temples, Ben considers the odds that Emma will leave him alone if he just ignores her (slim to none). This conversation was the most unwelcome distraction and so far had only become more confusing and frustrating the longer it went on.

Realising that she’d actually been silent for the last minute or so he lifts his head to find her staring at the security feed playing on the monitors beside him, all four of them currently showing different angles of the produce section, instead of flicking around the store like they normally did. And he definitely needs to find out how she did that because the constant motion had left him a headache that had stuck the week he’d been trapped in the office, but that was definitely a question for later, because he’d just caught sight of this guy leaning over the display of apples to reach some from the middle of the tower and he’s 99% sure he’s found the stores’ pervert.

Yup, it’s him; Ben is definitely a pervert.  At least after glancing over at Emma’s and finding a glazed expression he’s sure he’s sporting a twin to, he takes comfort in the fact that he isn’t the only one.

Clapping his hands to regain her attention he declares, “Alright, time to work!”

After sputtering out dismayed protestations (that don’t progress much further than “But”) Emma finally nods sadly, “Ugh, you’re probably right.”

“Damn right I am,” Ben agrees with a grin, “I think the produce section needs to be cleared up – it’s looking extremely messy to me!”

Any lingering annoyance over the distraction from the work still piled up on his desk has completely disappeared.

 

***

 

Stiles can feel judgemental stares burning into the back of his neck and is aware he probably looks like an idiot right now, but on his list of priorities, walking normally is nowhere near as high as his need to stock up on the ridiculous amount of snacks required for the pack of werewolves on their way to his house. The next priority was making it home before they all turn up and start chewing on the furniture. Again.

(Which reminds him; he needs to check if Lydia can remember how she’d made the wolfsbane alcohol. He wants to get Scott and Isaac drunk and question them properly because he just can’t believe their promises that they’d thought it was a gingerbread house and not a dollhouse. Because honestly, if that was true why the hell hadn’t they stopped after the first wall?)

Whatever. The point was he didn’t care how fat his ass looked from where it was poked out as he steered the shopping cart with his elbows so his hands were free to google how to best pick an avocado. He should have brought Derek with him; he’s always so good at sniffing out the best fruit and vegetables. (Literally though).

 

***

 

Having split up into the two end aisles to ‘tidy up’ in an attempt at being less obvious Emma realises the tactical error made in stopping first as the hot guy was working his way through the produce section away from her and now Ben was going to come across him first. Deciding Ben can suck it up because she saw him first (and really, Ben wouldn’t even know her future husband was in the store if she hadn’t told him) she gives up the pretence of working and winks at Ben over the hot guy’s shoulder and exaggeratedly mouths “DIBS”.

Swaying over to the cutie by the carrots she notices that he’s busy googling something and happily finds her in. “Hey sugar, anything I can help you with?”

“Oh god yes please,” The guy moans, and wow he should definitely come with a warning, “If you have any idea on how to pick a good avocado you will be my new favourite person here and quite possibly save my lounge in the process. Honestly, I’m also feeling betrayed that the internet is telling me nothing.” (Yup - Ben can be the best man at their wedding; this guy is clearly into her, just check out the enthusiasm!)

“That is actually something I know,” Emma crows, “You gotta pick off the little stem thingy,” picking up an avocado to demonstrate, “And if it’s brown underneath,” she pouts down at the brownish spot avocado of avocado she’s just uncovered, “Uh, like so, then it’s bad.”

“Dude!” the guy exclaims, and grabs a random avocado from the display, “That’s an awesome trick!” 

Noticing the green inside of the avocado he peeled she comments archly, “You must have a magic touch then.”

“You have no idea,” the guys laughs brightly.

“Anyway, I’m Emma,” she introduces herself, slightly breathless over how well this is going.

“Stiles,” he responds immediately, “I should let you get back to work though, but seriously thank you for that. That was the best tip ever. You’re awesome!” He calls the last over his shoulder as he heads back to his cart at the end of the aisle.

Huh. Maybe she should have left him for Ben.

 

***

 

“Hi, sorry,” a voice interrupts Stiles’ comparison over the nutritional panels on Turkish flat bread prompting him to just drop them both in the cart (because honestly there’s been pretty much no difference and it’s not like there’s a danger of food going to waste with werewolves around) and looks over to see a guy around his age smiling nervously. “I know you don’t work here but I can see that you have eggs in your trolley and I can’t seem to find them despite going around the store at least twice now.”

“Yeah, no problems man,” Stiles soothes, “They’re just at the end of the aisle to the right.”

“Thanks, um, you can call me Steve if you want,” he offers in a weirdly hopeful tone.

“Yeah sure, Steve,” Stiles agrees easily, “I’m Stiles.”

“That’s an interesting name,” he comments politely.

 “If by ’interesting’ you mean ‘weird’ sure,” Stiles snorts, “But that’s what happens when you give a kid a name that’s impossible to pronounce and then asking him at age two what he wants to be called. Anyway I’m sure you don’t want to hear a rambling story from some random dude in the supermarket so I’ll leave you to your eggs.”

“I mean the eggs aren’t urgent or anything, I’m free to hear that story if you want?”

 Laughing because he might just have found a person who beats Scott out for friendliness levels, he just waves Steve off (because it really is a long rambling story), “No thanks dude, I don’t really have the time but maybe next time you can’t find something?”

“Yeah sure,” Steve mumbles, “Thanks again for the help.”

“Anytime Steve. I know how it feels anyway, sometimes I feel like I can’t see things that are right in front of me.”

 

***

 

Ben nods sympathetically to Steve as he passes by him heading to the registers holding his ‘found’ eggs.

He makes a mental note to check in with him tomorrow to see how he’s holding up since they’re both working the opening shift.

 

***

 

Stiles is lost in thought, blocking the freezer door that guards the Ben & Jerrys icecream when a pair of hands firmly grip his waist, picking him up effortlessly and balancing him gently on the handlebars of the cart.

Hooking his legs around his handsy and handsome boyfriend, Stiles rolls the cart in closer to Derek and snuggles up to his back enjoying the feeling of his back muscles moving under his cheek as he grabs what should be a month’s supply of icecream but in actuality is probably only just enough to last the weekend.

“You smell good,” he murmurs, knowing he’ll be able to hear him as he rubs his face affectionately against his shoulder blades.

“I’ll smell better now,” Derek replies, and if he didn’t already know that this was the man for him he definitely would now.

 

***

 

After serving Stiles and the lucky man that apparently gets to call himself his boyfriend, Emma can’t even be sad that her future husband is probably not going to end up her future husband.

The world’s cutest couple (because gruff and grumbly paired with bright and bubbly was definitely working for them) had spent the entire transaction wrapped around each other, with the boyfriend spending the majority of the time with his face tucked against Stiles’ neck (and if he wasn’t so grouchy looking Emma would definitely be likening him to a cuddly koala by now).

She couldn’t even be bitter and get mad that the grumpy boyfriend wasn’t good enough because he’d smiled sweetly at him the entire time and saved Stiles from falling backwards into the cart not once but three times (when he was explaining the avocado test there was a lot more enthusiastic and adorable arm movements required).

 

Ugh they’re perfect

 

 

Notes:

Shout out to Myrin who suggested clothes shopping - imma probably do that in a few fics time but in the meantime have something similar!

Also, I found how to pick an avocado extremely easily via Google so I'm sure Stiles would have managed this, but because this is an AU just go with it.

 

Also I've been seriously overwhelmed by the positive feedback so far with this series so hit me up with ideas on where to find them next. I'm thinking the beach / the park?