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It was two days after the pageant and Ozzie was enjoying a restful night of watching TV with his Froggie curled up in his lap sketching on his tablet and their pack of Quieves around them on the couch or the floor. Everything was as it should be. They were safe and together and Fizz was no longer working for Mammon. He should be perfectly content. But something didn’t feel right.
Ozzie’s chest felt weird. It felt like his heart was beating too fast even though he’d just been laying on the couch for hours. It didn’t make sense why his heart would be pounding like he’d just had really intense sex. It was starting to freak him out a little. And it didn’t help that his hands were shaking a little. Maybe that was why Fizz’s service Quieve, Stormy, had decided to perch on the back of the couch right beside Ozzie’s shoulder. But if she was signaling, then did that mean that something really was wrong with him? Was there even anything wrong, or was he worrying for no reason?
He tried to ignore it and figured his heart would calm down if he just tried to breathe and relax. Focusing on Fizz and running his fingers over Fizz’s thighs and back and chest and face always made him feel better, but this time he still wasn’t able to completely relax. Not even when Fizz purred happily and loosely wrapped his tail around Ozzie’s wrist. In fact, the strange pounding felt worse, and he smelled chlorine. Did he need a doctor? But Deadly Sins never got sick.
Then what was going on with him? He tried to focus on breathing deeply and stroking his imp’s cheek for the rest of the Drag Race: Hell episode, but it didn’t help. He truly had no idea what he was meant to do to calm his heart. Was there anything he could do? Should he tell Fizz?
Like he was reading his mind, the little imp suddenly furrowed his brow and looked up at him. “You okay, Ozzie?”
“Yeah. Why do you ask?”
“Your hand is shaking. And you look kinda freaked out.”
He looked down at the hand that had been stroking Fizz and saw that it was indeed still shaking. And that worried him more. “I’m fine. I guess I’m just feeling a little weird.”
Fizz shifted to press an ear to his chest. “Shit, babe. Your heart’s going pretty fast. Are you sure you’re okay?” He put the tablet aside and straddled him, sending him a concerned look that got worse when Stormy whined a little and put a little paw on Ozzie’s arm.
“I…I’m not sure. There’s nothing wrong and emotionally, I feel fine. But my heart is just pounding, and I have no idea why.”
His Froggie examined him worriedly for a moment before saying, “You might be having a delayed panic attack.”
“What’s that?”
“Like, when you go through shit, but don’t react to it until later. It’s happened to me a lot of times. Here.” Fizz turned off the TV and snapped on the blue sconces around the dark room. “Vexa, play my Therapy playlist.” When the calming music started playing, he got off of Ozzie and grabbed a blanket. “Now, lie down.”
Ozzie did as he was told and fully laid down on the couch. When he was flat on his back, he immediately felt a little better and when his Froggie tucked the large blanket around him and then crawled under it and onto his chest, the tears started. He had no idea why he was crying, but tears leaked from his eyes and Fizz snuggled closer, Stormy whining again.
“Yeah, that can happen,” his imp murmured. “When you finally start to feel it, then you usually cry.”
“But I don’t understand why this is happening. Especially when today has been really relaxing.”
“It’s probably because of what happened at the pageant. We never really talked about that, and it was a really big deal.”
He held Fizz tight against his chest and the tears started, his breath hitching.
“Aww, Oz.” Fizz nuzzled his face and neck and stretched his arms around Oz’s neck. “You’re okay. You’re safe. Everything’s okay. I’m here.” He started purring again and cuddled his face against Ozzie’s cheek.
For a while, they laid like that, Fizzie’s purrs and snuggles working to calm Ozzie’s racing heart. It was only a little, but it still helped beyond words. And Stormy helped too, by just being close to him. He was able to breathe deeply, and his tears slowed and finally stopped. Taking a deep breath, he inhaled his love’s sweet and sugary scent mixed with metal. It was the single best scent in all of Hell for Oz, and he wished he could bottle it and keep it for himself.
“Are you feeling better?” Fizz asked at one point. “Your heart sounds better.”
“Yeah. I’m still feelin’ off, but it’s not as bad. Thank you, Froggie.”
Those big red-and-green eyes sparkled with love and affection. “Anything for you, babe. I love you.”
“I love you too, Fizz.”
“Do you feel like you can walk?”
“Yeah. Why?”
Fizz hopped off and held out a metal hand. When Ozzie took it, he led him into the kitchen and nudged him into a chair, most of the Quieves following lazily. He then stretched up to grab two slices of bread and put them in the toaster. When they sprang up, he spread crunchy peanut butter on them and made hot chocolate with whipped cream before placing it and the toast on the table in front of Ozzie. And he scooped his love up against his chest, nuzzling his face. “Thank you, Froggie. You’re so good to me.”
“Aw, Oz. Of course. You take such good care of me, so of course I’m gonna take care of you. How about after you finish this, we get a bath and then go to bed?”
“That sounds perfect, babe. Are you gonna have anything to eat?”
“Yeah, I’ll get myself a little something.” He slithered back to the floor and started to make his own toast and hot chocolate, his toast with Nutella instead of peanut butter.
While he was working, Ozzie nibbled his toast and smiled fondly. Whether it was the food, his love taking care of him, or just the fact that he was actually paying attention to what he was feeling, he did feel better. His heart felt calmer and he was a little bit less tense.
“I love you,” he said again when Fizz sat back down in front of him, his voice and face thick with affection.
Fizz paused and looked up with wide eyes filled with the same emotions as during their duet. And when he spoke, his voice was all honey and hearts. “I love you too, Ozzie. You look like you’re feeling better.”
“I am. Little by little, anyway.”
“Good. Don’t think that means I’m not gonna be pampering the shit out of you for the rest of the night, though.”
Ozzie laughed and leaned forward to kiss his love and nuzzle his face. They ate in silence for a bit, listening to Fizz’s Therapy playlist, before he snickered in loving amusement. “One Direction? Really, Fizz?”
“What?” Fizz smirked around his toast. “They’re comforting! I can’t help that they speak to some part of my soul!”
“Part of your soul is a tweenage girl?”
“Why do you think I love pastels so much?”
They laughed and finished their snacks between happy and flirty smiles. When they were done, Fizz loaded the dishes in the dishwasher and grabbed Ozzie’s hand again. They left the Quieves in the kitchen and he led him to their en suite bathroom and set about putting together a bath with all of Ozzie’s favorite things. Lavender ecstasy bath salts, a LUSH intergalactic swirling galaxy bath bomb, pink sugar incense, and minimal lighting aside from a small collection of heart- and dick-shaped candles. All of that plus the jets, the lights in the Jacuzzi tub, the eucalyptus plant, and low purple lighting and it might as well have been Heaven.
“Ta-da!” Fizz exclaimed when he was finished setting everything up. “Sorry I don’t have any rose petals.”
Ozzie scooped him up again and nuzzled his face. “Everything looks perfect, Froggie. But there is one thing you forgot.”
“Really? What’s that?”
“You forgot to get us naked.”
Fizz laughed and draped his arms around Ozzie’s neck. “Well, we better fix that, then.”
They quickly got undressed and slid into the hot, aromatic water, both of them sighing in contentment. He held Fizz up with one hand so he could cuddle against his chest, but he only stayed there a moment before slithering into the corner ledge of the tub. He nudged Ozzie’s shoulders, so his back was turned and trailed kisses along his neck and shoulders.
“What are you up to?” Ozzie purred, looking back at him.
“Shh. Just listen to the music, breathe everything in, and relax.” He dripped peppermint essential oil onto Ozzie’s shoulders and began massaging it in, purring into his ear.
The remaining tension rapidly left Ozzie’s body as his love rubbed his shoulders. He would fall from Heaven again and again until the end of time if it meant he could keep coming back to this moment, with the being who owned his entire heart. Moments like these were the only moments when Asmodeus felt truly and completely at peace. But there was something still weighing on his mind. “You really think this whole thing is about what happened at the pageant?”
Fizz paused, but only for a moment. “I do. It was a really big deal, to come out to everyone like that. I mean, I was ready to un-quit if it meant our relationship stayed secret.”
“Do you wish I hadn’t said anything?”
Taking a deep breath, Fizz slid around his shoulders to face him, his arms around his neck and his eyes full of love. Ozzie automatically lowered his hand to support his Froggie’s weight and cooed when Fizz went in for more face nuzzles before saying, “Not at all. The alternative was me going back to Mammon before I even left him and now I’m free from him and I still have you. Plus, it was so fucking hot, how you stood up for me like that. And how you told all of Hell on live TV that you love me. It made me feel so cared for. Like I really am yours.”
“Of course, you’re mine, Froggie. I can’t tell you how happy I am that you don’t have to deal with him ever again. And it is a relief that everyone knows now. Now we don’t have to try and hide anything.”
“Now I don’t have to worry about what it would mean for you if everyone knew. Did it feel good to say that to Mammon?”
“Oh, you know it did,” he laughed, holding Fizz closer. “I hope you know this means a lot more PDA. Like, a lot more. Prepare to be smothered with love.”
Fizz cackled a bit. “We might have to make an exception on our love song ban. Or make another club.”
“A second club just for sentimentality?” he asked with a big smile.
“Sure, why not? You’ve talked before about the overlap between love and lust, so it could be about that. There’s also a ton of demons wanting slots at the club, anyway.”
“You’ve been thinking of this for a while, haven’t you?”
“Ma-aybe. And why not? Imagine us having a chain of Ozzie’s all over Lust and maybe even in other Rings.”
“I think that sounds like a great idea except for one thing.”
“And what’s that?”
“I don’t want the clubs to be called Ozzie’s anymore. We can still keep the original as Ozzie’s and maybe make a chain of that too, but I want the new clubs to be called something different.”
Fizz furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What else would they be called?”
“Fizzmodeus.”
The imp cheered wildly and gave him a deep and loving kiss, his limbs wrapped multiple times around Ozzie’s body. “Do you feel like you’re fully recovered from your panic attack?”
He stared into the bright eyes of the demon he loved most in all of Hell and felt completely at peace. “Yeah. I do. Thank you for taking care of me, Froggie.”
“Anytime, Ozzie. I love you.”
“And I love you.”