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When Haruka became an Idol, she felt like she finally discovered her purpose.
Walking up on a stage and seeing multiple people who somehow, in someway - were reached to by her perfomances. Her songs, her voice and her oh so moving words of motivation she gave to all her fans at the end of every single show. Happiness and excitement clearly written at the faces of everyone who layed their eyes upon the one and only, Haruka, the idol.
Oh how that title suited her.
Everytime someone happened to tell her that she changed their life for the better, she always made sure to let that person know that the power that helped their life get so good was in themselves all along, all she did was help them realise it.
And that person would smile. Sometimes a few tears building up in their eyes.
"You're so kind..." People told her.
And she would smile too.
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After a falling-out with one of the ASRUN members, Haruka was left in her own grey world of routine again. Idol work stressing her more than she ever thought possible. Her legs trembling before every show, every public appearance. It took so much out of her, that even in her free time, that happy energy her friends and family loved so much, was gone. Day by day, her life getting harder and harder to work her way through.
Hopeless, was what she felt most of the time.
Regret growing in her mind non stop, whispering to her that everything that happened to her friend was her fault.
Her, so called, "idol aura" that was supposed to help people better themselves, give them hope for a better tomorrow - ruined someone's life, and crushed their dreams.
The only thing Haruka happened to like about herself being proven to be the worst part of her.
She could never forgive herself.
And as the regret and stress worked their way and navigated through Haruka's entire being, she gave up on what she loved the most.
And her world would get even greyer.
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There were times where she regretted giving up on her idol career. But they were short lived. Haruka was always quick to remind herself why she chose this over anything else.
And she would cave down on herself even more.
Her friends never noticed.
To them, she looked and acted as ordinarily as possible.
She would have never thought that a fan of hers, a seemingly avarage fan, would notice what was troubling her and read her mind better than her own family did.
Minori was...scary.
She was always cheerful, even during times where she defenitely shouldn't be. Even when she kept on failing and failing, even as the world tried to prove her she wasn't going to succed, and made it its own mission to make Minori finally give up.
Who wouldnt be upset during times like these? Times where everything was going against them, their dream seeming more and more unachievable every day, and the only source of their comfort getting so cought up with their own dark thoughts that they had to leave.
Minori wouldn't.
She was weird.
Her body language always all over the place. She kept bumping into people, making awkward gestures and almost tripping every few minutes.
To everyone else, that would be a clear sign to not pick up any physical activity in fear of hurting themselves on accident.
To Minori, however, it was a sign to pick up dancing and keep working "more and more" ( a phrase she reapeted so incredibly often, a one that Haruka so quickly grew fond of) towards bettering and smoothing out her movements.
Minori was fun to be around.
She always had fun and exciting ideas on how she should spend her time with her friends. Hanging out with her was like having a lunch break after a hard and tiring school day or like getting ice cream on a very hot day. She always made sure that the person next to her wasn't bored and that they had enough space to not only listen to her talk, but also talk on their own too. To let them speak their mind, to let her know how they're doing, how they're REALLY feeling deep down and to let them know that, despite her own personal troubles, she was going to try and help them however she can.
It was something Haruka would really benefit from later on, as they grew closer to each other.
When the two joined MORE MORE JUMP alongside other Idols that, similarly to Haruka, decided to quit on their dreams - it was like that one time, long ago, when Haruka was invited on stage by an Idol, and she made up her mind about becoming an idol in the future too. It felt like redescovering her own self. She started to like herself more, her qualities finally being noticed and appriciated by the other MORE MORE JUMP members. She was happier than ever.
There were, of course, instinces in which Haruka would overwork herself for her new idol group.
It was just in her nature to try and help everyone no matter how hard and draining it was.
Usually, when she did that, people would thank her and move on.
More More Jump was different.
Shizuku made sure to treat Haruka her favourite food, so she doesn't forget to eat when cought up in her work.
Airi would try and make her laugh, so her thoughts and stress dont consume her entirely.
And Minori,
well,
she was Minori.
Of course, she did everything she could to help Haruka. To get her to finally realise that, while More More Jump obviously appriciates her help, they're a group, and their work and effort they put in should be spread accordingly.
And of course she tried to cheer Haruka on.
As well as buy her penguin merch to cheer her up.
Alongside making her tea and bringing in sweets for her.
And -
Well, there was a lot of and's.
But Haruka appriciated each and every one the same.
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Haruka loved everyone in More More Jump the same amount. At least thats how it was at the beginning.
She tried her best to keep composed and to not let her feelings distract her too much from her everyday life, chores and work.
However it would get really hard, eventually.
She couldn't help stealing short glances at her dearest friend at practice time. Nor could she help looking away from her, trying to hide her flustered and smiling face whenever Minori sent a praise her way. She was so bad at it that, in fact, her closest friends would quickly pick up on it.
An was the first one to comment on it, simply joking about a scenario in which Minori and Haruka go on a date. Just a small and simple joke with a silly punchline. Yet, to Haruka it was a sign of proof that she wasn't being so subtle about her emotions at all. And it scared her, but at the same time...
it was also reasurring, to know that her friends supported her in her little crushing.
"crushing", she thought.
Was that all there was to it?
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Love was always a hard concept to grasp on, at least for Haruka.
All the love songs, romantic movies, mangas and series, inevetably surrounding her in life. Most of the time, she would just drift her attention to something else, something she could relate more to, but sometimes, she couldn't help but think what is it really like to "like" someone.
When she hit her early teenage years and the people her age started getting into relationships and gossiping about love drama happening close by, she was left confused, feeling left out even.
She never understood why and how can someone possibly be so intrigued by another person that they would name their emotions by such a strong word like Love.
"what do you like about them?" she would ask her friends when they mentioned developing a crush on someone.
"I think its his humour, he's just so silly and always knows hows to make me laugh!"
"Oh, they're just so incredibly smart, you know?"
"He's the nicest person I ever met"
Haruka still didn't get it.
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That was until she finally stopped battleing her thoughts and feelings.
She loved her, obviously but...
she still couldnt tell why.
So she took some time to think about it.
What was it about Minori that made her so special?
Was it the way she was always a fan of hers, never missing a show, always showing up at meet and greets and never forgetting to gift Haruka something small she though her favourite idol would enjoy? No, almost every fan of an Idol does those things.
Maybe it's the fact that when Haruka hit her all time low and felt like she lost her own self forever, she was found and offered a helping hand by her? But didn't Airi and Shizuku also do that for her?
Or pheraps was it the way Minori would always try and make everyone around her feel better, give them "hope for a better tomorrow", as she said it? All idols do that though.
She never gives up and she encourages people to not give up too.
She always wears a bright smile on her face. And she has a great sense of style.
Haruka will never forget the time where they wanted to dress up in a special way, when Minori used her amazing clothing-knowledge and combined it with her love for Haruka's idol persona to design and prepare a perfect costume for her. The idol would smile at the memory.
Ah, there was also that one time when Minori tried to do a certain dance on stream, that turned out to be a bit hard for her. There were, of course, some cruel comments made about this instance, but even so, Minori, despite being a bit saddened by said comments, kept trying and used that expierience to only better her skills. That was defenitely something to admire.
Her looks where defenitely something to admire too. Even though Haruka was always against the idea of judging someone by their looks, she couldnt help but always think about how pretty her friend is.
Her brown flowy, delicate and soft hair, moving like thin silk whenever it would get windy. And her skin gaining a glowy aura when the sun shined at her, as she squinted her eyes to not look directly at the sun beams. And those eyes of hers -
"Hello!!!?? Earth to Haruka!!"
"Huh? Oh, sorry I must have gotten distracted, I apologize"
Minori and her Idol were currently sitting in a small cafe located downtown. It was defenitely atmospheric, cozy pillows located on each and every seat, cute cat pictures on the walls enlightened by the evening sunlight coming in through the big glass window on the other side of the cafe.
Haruka looked down at her plate to realize once again that she hasn't finished eating her piece of cheesecake yet. (Yes, she was on a diet but Minori told her she deserved a few cheat days, and she didnt argue)
"Ahh! Dont apologize, its okay! I thought something happened ehehe" She glanced over Haruka's plate really quickly "Uh oh do you not like the cake I chose??! Ahh Im so sorry, I should've known better. Here, I can go and buy you another one if you'd like?"
A moment of silence fell upon them for a few seconds while the two idols exchanged looks. It wasn't an awkward silence however. It was pleasant. Minori waited patiently for Haruka to decide whether or not she should go and order anything else for her, while Haruka kept staring at Minori in slight disbelief that she would be willing to give up more money on her just to make sure she's fully sadisfied with their date.
"Oh um..." Haruka almost entirely forgot what brought them to this cafe that day. It was a date. An official date. Not a one-on-one dancing practice or walking each other home, to the blue haired girl, this was a real deal.
A small embarassement crept up on her face as the realisation, that the girl in front of her was now in fact her date, hit her. Not like she didnt like that, of course she did. It was only the fact that she wasn't ever used to loving someone and/or being loved by someone else to the point where the two of them would decide to date. It was still a fresh and new concept.
Haruka smiled warmly, "No, its okay, thank you though. And Minori, I wanted to thank you once again for inviting me, this..." - she pointed between herself and the other - "has been really nice. I still dont know how to go on about this, this is the first time I've ever... seen anyone this way. But I'm glad I'm finally seeing someone, and Im even more glad it's you"
"I guess what Im trying to say is, I love you, Minori"
The girl grew red on her cheeks, the same way she always does when Haruka says something slightely positive about or towards her. Her smile grew wider and wider to the point where she decided its ridiculous and chose to cover her mouth with her hands. And her eyes bloomed sparkles in them.
Haruka intensly stared at those eyes. She was mesmarised.
Whenever she looked into her eyes, she felt like all the parts in her life, the good and the bad, were finally seen, appriciated, understood, and loved by someone.
And the other part she loved about Minori's grey sparkly eyes, was how hypnotizingly pretty they were.
"Well I love you too Haruka!! Obviously!!"
Haruka giggled, happy at the cute response.
Her world, once again, was trapped in the grey color.
But it didnt bother her anymore, nor did it make her upset or anxious.
Her world was grey, but purely because it was the eye color of her one and only Minori.
Grey seens like a sad color, yes, but to Haruka it was the happiest color amongst them all, she loved it and wanted to keep embracing it for the rest of her days
And she wouldn't want it any other way.