Work Text:
ONE
Neil tapped his fingers in rapid succession against the wood of the bar as he waited for Roland’s attention. Eden’s was busy as ever, and while Neil would have much preferred going straight to the Columbia house after their trip to Sweetie’s for dinner, the group wouldn’t be swayed. Neil had tried to argue (even with his mouth preoccupied by the avocado burger he was downing), but before he could get far, Kevin interrupted– insisting he didn’t mind. That he would be fine. Only Neil was allowed to use that word, not him. Kevin deserved much better than fine.
Then again, maybe it was for the best. Nicky and Aaron were borderline intolerable without a Saturday Night Out, and Edgar Allan would win another Exy national championship before Kevin let go of his stubborn pride and admitted he had a weak spot for their outings. (re: neither would ever happen)
So Neil didn’t push. And here he was, standing at a sticky bar with bodies pressing against him, waiting for the moment he could get back to his table and onto Kevin’s lap.
Roland handed a receipt to the woman he had been busy serving and finally met Neil’s gaze.
“Hey! What’s good?” Roland greeted him for the first time that night. “You guys finish off that tray already? Andrew was just up here.”
Neil shook his head. “I need two more sodas. One orange, one coke.”
He didn’t bother alerting Kevin of his arrival back to the table–too busy debating with a drunk Aaron to notice him approaching the booth–instead, he just slid past Kevin’s legs and plopped into the space between him and Andrew.
“Here,” Neil smiled gently and slid over the glass of Sunkist.
“Thanks,” Kevin said, but he didn’t take a drink. Neil could see him eyeing Nicky as he grabbed another shot and downed it without so much as a grimace or a chaser.
Neil rested his chin on Kevin’s shoulder. He resisted kissing his jawline, but didn’t stop himself from taking a deep breath to inhale Kevin’s woodsy cologne. Neil spoke softly, “If you don’t want soda they have lemonade. Or a mocktail.”
Kevin shook his head. “This is good.” He leaned forward slightly and put his lips around the straw. Moments passed before he popped back up and turned to face Neil, something akin to mischief in his eyes.
“What?” Neil asked.
Kevin leaned in and burped the carbonation directly in Neil’s face.
“Gross,” Neil laughed, wafting his hand between them.
Kevin smiled and gave him a quick peck on the lips, then he turned to Andrew to ask who was right–Aaron, who thought Taco Bell was the best fast food restaurant, or Kevin, who voted for his newfound love Sonic?
TWO
Kevin stretched as far as he could, his hands hitting the dorm wall and his legs star-fishing across the bed. Neil was already up, and a glance at Andrew’s bunk found it empty too.
He didn’t bother showering or changing out of his sleep shirt. He wanted a glass of apple juice and he wanted to catch the Sunday morning highlight reel on ESPN. They did a ‘Top 20’ countdown every week and from a glance at his alarm clock, he woke up late enough that they most likely already broke the top 10 plays.
When he opened the bedroom door, he found his family not on the couch but in the kitchen. Neil and Andrew were drinking coffee and working on the crossword puzzle from today’s paper, Nicky was at the stove making breakfast, and Aaron was scarfing several pancakes down at the other end of the table.
“Kevin! Good morning. How many pancakes do you want? Three, four? Neil wants blueberries in his, what about you?”
Kevin glanced at the dark screen of the TV then back at Nicky.
“Blueberries... sound good. I’ll take three.” He made his way over to Neil, not having to say as much as a word before he scooted his chair back to make room for Kevin to settle into his lap.
He took in the smell of Neil’s shampoo and reveled in the soft silence that enveloped the room.
His eyes glanced down at where Neil’s pencil was poised. Five Down. Selene, to a Roman.
“Five down is ‘Luna’. She was the goddess of the moon,” Kevin said.
Neil hummed. He scrawled it in with his right hand, his left arm making its way around Kevin’s waist.
“Bien dormi?” Neil asked, planting a kiss on his back.
“Bien, oui,” Kevin answered.
He had slept well. There hadn’t been many nights at the nest that didn’t involve Riko shouting him awake, being hauled onto a bus in the small hours of the night, or just not getting enough hours to allow for sleep in between their practice and class schedule.
Today he woke at nine, after the same amount of hours of sleep, no alarm set and nothing to prove. It was novel. It was incredible. It was becoming increasingly more common by the day.
Most days Neil and him shared the same perspective of get up and get moving. He loved spending his days on the court, he needed his green juice to survive, and he had even taken to running lately. As long as it involved Neil, hair slicked back, tanned skin on display, out of breath, gasping–
“You too are so freakin’ cute,” Nicky said as he sat down at the table, jarring Kevin out of his thoughts. “Second round of pancakes are done. Serve yourself. And there’s whipped cream in the fridge if you want it, Andrew.”
Neil poked Kevin’s side to get him to stand up. They each made a plate and sat back down at the table, Kevin in his own chair this time.
After a few bites, Kevin reached for the syrup, because they tasted better sweetened than they did dry.
THREE
“You’re not mad?”
“Why would I be mad?”
“I dunno.” Neil shrugged. “At the nest you and Thea must have…”
Kevin furrowed his eyebrows. “That was me and Thea. This is me and you.”
“What’s the difference?” Neil whispered.
“The difference…” Kevin stopped to think. The difference was everything. There was nothing to even be said about him and Thea.
When Kevin looked back at his relationship born out of the nest, he didn't see much more than two people needing an escape. Kevin, trying to snag a couple hours out from under Riko’s thumb. Thea, wanting to pretend she was on the outside, like Kevin was just a normal boy she was hooking up with at a normal college party.
The other person wasn’t an important factor, the rebellion was.
With Neil, it was the opposite. Neil was the most important person in Kevin’s life. And he was never supposed to have any of this.
Kevin was supposed to be straight. He’d spent his entire life doing everything he could to ensure his spot on a pro team: making the grades, following a diet plan, crafting a public persona that charmed both exy reporters and fans.
Two years ago he wouldn't dare do anything that could prevent his chances of being scouted or interfere with an invitation to join Court. And then: Neil.
No one could be sure how Kevin Day and Neil Josten happened, really. It definitely shouldn’t have happened. But anyone with eyes could see the difference it made.
The best way to describe it, those close to Kevin had found, was to envision someone who only had access to 50% of their lung capacity. On a day to day basis, it was what they operated on. Their chest rises and falls and their brain receives all the oxygen it needs to survive. They’re functioning just fine, and so it’s impossible to tell that anything is really wrong.
But at some point, someone comes along, someone like Neil, and reveals what had been hidden inside the entire time. A part of you that you didn’t know existed. That other 50% existed, and was ready to be used. For someone like Kevin, there wouldn't be another moment from now on where it wasn't filled to the brim.
Now, Kevin could breathe deep. He could exhale, and still have air to spare. New areas in his mind clicked on. He doesn’t become sharper, more proficient– doesn’t need to. Instead his mind turns to putty in the safety of Neil’s arms. He could rest, and peace would engulf him.
Neil was his now, integrally.
What Kevin and Neil do with their time together, now that they have it, was much less important. They could kiss, they could fuck, they could hold hands or sleep in the same bed. What did Kevin care, as long as it was with Neil?
“Sex is not something I need,” was what Kevin ended up saying. He wanted to make that clear.
Neil looked like he believed him, but he didn’t look happy about it.
“Is sex something you want?” Kevin tried again.
Neil shook his head.
“Ok, well, I want what you want to give me.”
He kissed Neil’s forehead.
“I love you,” he said.
“For who you are,” he cusped Neil’s hand.
“And I don’t need sex,” he’d say it a million times if he had to.
“I just need you.” The admission was out of his mouth before he could think.
When Neil looked up, he found Kevin’s gaze already on him. It took effort not to tremble under the weight of his stare. Leave it to Kevin to make him weak in the knees right after confessing a lack of desire to have sex. He didn’t want sex, that was true, but he desperately wanted to kiss him. So he did. And he thought he could do this forever.
FOUR
“Flashlights?” Dan asked. She went down the line one by one as everyone gave their affirmative. Yes they had a flashlight, yes they had a pair of tennis shoes, yes they had granola bars and trail mix and other various snacks, yes they had sunscreen.
All ten Foxes were going on a hiking-slash-camping trip this spring break (Dan’s idea) and being the ever attentive captain she was, a week before the trip a mass text found its way onto each of the Foxes' phones with a list of essentials to pack. She was now going through said list to make sure everyone was set before getting on the bus she’d rented.
“Blankets?” Dan asked.
“Check!” Matt said.
“Yep,” Katelyn said while Aaron nodded.
Nicky flashed a thumbs up.
“Neil?” Dan prompted.
Neil shook his head, “Don’t need one.”
Dan frowned. “It’s going to be cold at night. I might have an extra–” She began rooting through her duffle bag.
“I’ll be fine,” Neil interrupted. He gestured a thumb towards Kevin.
“Ugh!” Dan groaned. “Kevin is not your personal heater, Neil!”
“He kind of is though,” Neil said.
“I kind of am though,” Kevin conceded.
Dan could do nothing but tilt her head toward the sky, a prolonged sigh escaping her lips.
“I can see what Wymack meant by ‘above his pay grade’”, she said with a wry smile. “Let's head out– Congaree isn’t going to wait forever.” And with that the Foxes filed one by one onto the bus.
The monsters took the back half while the upperclassman spread out at the front. Allison slid The Devil Wears Prada into the overhead DVD player.
Neil fell asleep almost immediately, his backpack a pillow between his head and the window, one of Kevin’s headphones slowly making its way out of his ear. Aaron and Andrew produced a deck of cards and started a never-ending game of war on the middle seat between them.
Matt managed to get them to Congaree’s campsite with plenty of time to set up their belongings before they headed out on a short walk to check out the space. The forest was dense, but mostly clear, the trees just beginning to grow back their spring leaves.
At some point they turned back around, and Katelyn, seizing the opportunity now that everyone was too tired to protest, wrangled the group into the frame of her selfie-stick, a sliver of the lake visible behind them.
In the center of their camp they built a small fire, roasted hotdogs, and stayed up talking well past the sun going down.
Only when the chill became too much to bear did the Foxes retreat to their respective tents. Neil laid with his back against the ground as he waited for Kevin to zip the entrance closed. He looked up at the stars through the mesh top.
“Scooch over,” Kevin whispered.
Neil shuffled slightly to his right as Kevin plopped down next to him, his head hitting his pillow with a soft thud.
Once Kevin was settled in, Neil scooched back closer. He shivered.
“Take this off,” Neil said, pulling at Kevin’s shirt.
Kevin did as he was told and Neil wrapped his arms around his bare torso. Heat radiated off him and seared into Neil.
Kevin tucked his chin against Neil’s unkempt hair. “G’night,” he mumbled.
Neil smiled into Kevin’s chest. He pressed his feet onto the surface of Kevin’s thighs, vying for more warmth. He traced his fingers up and down Kevin’s back for a short while, before he closed his eyes and unceremoniously fell asleep.
+1
No matter how it sounded, it would always be true: The court was Kevin’s first love.
The very first time the court’s plexiglass door banged shut behind him, his feet making contact with the hardwood and his racket gripped in his hands, Kevin felt his mother’s creation sweep up from the floor, circle around his physical being, and land directly in his soul.
Once he had a heart that was beating for exy, he spent every waking moment living and breathing the game. It wasn’t something he could shake– not that he saw any reason to.
Periodically throughout his adolescence he’d spare a little brain power on things other than exy, tricking people into thinking he cared about a school, or a coach, or even a brother, but his mind never stopped its chanting.
Exy exy exy. Win win win.
Having to leave Edgar Allan was just as the public thought: devastating. The Ravens were the best team in the league, Kevin could not be an exy player without them.
Until he was. With his hand still healing and his mind well past numbed, his father ran plays with him and consulted his advice. He helped come up with defensive schemes he knew suited the Foxes’ strengths and he made damn sure those around him, even the most apathetic, gave their all to the game.
What he didn’t account for was through having to convince Andrew to care about exy, to care about his life–because what was exy if not life?–Andrew inadvertently showed him how to care about other people.
For the better part of half a year, Andrew was never more than a hair’s breadth away from Kevin’s person. And while Andrew was watching out for him, he couldn’t help but watch Andrew.
He saw the way Andrew continuously put himself out on the line for the sake of his family. Nicky, Aaron. He fought against Riko when Kevin couldn’t. Andrew wasn’t afraid to do what he wanted to, when he wanted to. It just so happened, Kevin had noticed, that what Andrew wanted bared a striking similarity to what others asked of him. No, not just asked– he gave others what they needed from him.
Kevin was never able to get Andrew to care about exy. It took Neil’s arrival to make that happen, but Kevin– Kevin realized there were things to care about other than exy.
In fact, exy wasn’t really important at all. (No, it was, shit, let’s not go that far–) The people playing it were the most important bit. Why settle for first surrounded by an abusive coach and shit teammates when you could become the number one team with players who were your family. On and off the court.
It took the smashing of Kevin’s hand for him to learn just how invaluable a player’s body and wellbeing was.
“Take it.” That’s what Neil had said, the night Kevin asked for his game. Kevin saw the potential, the raw talent bursting through every pore on Neil's skin. It was a precious thing, the gift of someone’s soul. Kevin held it gently, in the palm of his hands–despite what all the yelling and arguing made it look like. He wasn’t going to let Neil make the same stupid mistakes he did. He had Neil’s game, and he was going to fight like hell to protect it.
That’s why he was so fucking pissed off.
The match was at the Foxhole Court, but the Bearcats were playing like they owned the place. The moment the buzzer sounded Binghamton was out for blood, and it wasn’t unlike the Foxes to give as good as they got.
Risky plays resulted in harsh checks and accidental elbows. An illegal hook brought Kevin to the penalty line just before halftime. He scored, and the Foxes were up 7-6.
The second half started much like the first, with the addition of Kevin and Neil’s manic energy conspiring to keep the Foxes in the lead. They were running on empty, but at least they were leading.
Forty minutes to go. The first ten minutes went by without a score from either team. Andrew blocked two of the Bearcats attempts, while the Foxes only made it down to the south side of the court once, unable to even get a decent shot on goal.
Possession remained in the Bearcats’ favor as the game continued. Andrew couldn’t hold them off forever, and eventually they got one past him, tying the game.
Kevin and Neil’s energy turned to anger as time went on. Neil felt red hot as he watched the opposing striker juke past Aaron, heading once again towards Andrew’s territory. Thankfully, Allison hit him with a nasty hip check and sent the man to his knees before he could get any further. She scooped up the loose ball and tossed it to Neil who was waiting nearby.
Rushing down the field, Neil was determined to make a breakaway play. The distance between Neil and his mark was growing–he was all but free to make a shot. He focused in on the goal, cataloged the goalie and her stick. Her tell was in her footwork. As the Foxes sunk in their goals in the first half, Neil noticed her right foot shifting the same way her racket swung.
His racket was in firing position, but he stilled, waiting to take the shot, eyes zeroing in on her foot. There. The goalie remained steadfast in the goal, waiting for Neil before she reacted with her stick, but her foot gave her away. She had already decided Neil would shoot on her left side.
Neil shifted his own body then, angling towards the upper righthand corner. He let go of the ball, and in that exact moment, he felt rather than saw a player run fast into his backside, sending Neil sprawling.
He didn’t see the ball as it wooshed into the net, or the goal as it lit up red.
He didn’t hear the Foxes’ cheering as the score was upped 8-7. Namely because there wasn’t any. They watched with bated breath as Neil, usually spry on his feet, tripped over himself and landed face-first on the hardwood floor.
The audience’s roar petered out, the TV screens shifting from a replay of Neil’s goal to Dan, reaching out an arm to help Neil up.
A whistle blew as Wymack called a timeout.
Jogging over to the edge of the court, the Foxes convened at Wymack’s station, Nicky and Renee joining them from the sidelines.
Neil was the last to make it over, his hand clutching his nose and his head lifted.
“That was quite the hit, kid,” Wymack began.
“I’m fine,” Neil said.
“He came out of nowhere! What’s that guy's deal?” Matt asked.
“Probably pissed we’re kicking their asses,” Dan panted, still catching her breath from trying to get to Neil before the backliner did.
“Take a seat, Abby can assess you,” Wymack said, gesturing towards the bench.
“It’s a bloody nose. I can play through it,” Neil snapped.
“It could be broken,” Nicky argued.
“I think I’d know, Hemmick.”
The Foxes grimaced.
“Rules say Abby has to check you out before you go back on. We’re using the last of our timeouts now, we can’t wait any longer,” Renee reasoned.
“Besides, your whole head was hit, not just your nose. I can see the bruise blossoming on your forehead,” Matt added.
Blossoming, Aaron mouthed.
“You need to get checked for a concussion too, that takes time,” Dan stated.
“If Kevin doesn’t have anyone to pass to, how exactly are we meant to score?” Neil asked. “We’re already exhausted and we’re only up one point. Their strikers will break through our defense and we’ll lose this game. I need to be out there.”
“Shut up!” Kevin snapped. He’d been watching them talk circles around one another. This was ridiculous, and he was putting his foot down. “You aren’t doing anybody any good. I don’t care if you can play through it, I don’t care if it doesn’t hurt, I don’t care if you’re fine. And I don’t care if the Bearcats score in your absence! You’re getting subbed out.”
Neil glared at Kevin through the tissue paper pressed tight against his face. He thought it highly unlikely he had a concussion. He’d played through worse, couldn’t Abby’s bandages and painkillers wait twenty minutes? But as he stared Kevin down, Kevin stared right back, neither of them backing off.
***
Andrew stood silently, observing Kevin and Neil’s standoff. The two idiots argued like an old married couple. Round and round and round until one of them got so self-righteous the other went from furious to turned on. Andrew had been in the couple’s periphery long enough to recognize the pattern.
He recognized the look on Neil’s face too. Put him back in the game now and he’d strike at the first thing that got in arms reach. Andrew did not have any desire to listen to Kevin’s bitching that would result if Neil hurt himself any further, or his I told you so rant that he’d lord over Neil until the last of his injuries were no longer visible.
He stepped forward. “Enough.”
All eyes turned towards him. Even Kevin whirled around, the finger he’d raised at Neil now pointing in Andrew’s direction.
“Abby will assess Neil. She will do it thoroughly, but she will do it quickly. We will leave our defense open for the remainder of the game.
Nicky’s jaw dropped, and Aaron glanced worryingly at him.
“We won’t need it,” Andrew assured. “I will block the goal and any ball I get will be sent your way.” He directed this at Kevin, who nodded his acquiescence.
“Aaron will act as Neil, and Nicky will help serve them both. Score or don’t score, we just need to hold them off and keep the ball on their side of the court.”
The Foxes lined up midcourt. The whistle blew, signaling the start of play.
Andrew’s eyes flicked from one player to the next and back again. The ball flung between rackets. He twirled his own racket in his hands. Shifted the weight of his feet. Watched as the Foxes managed a steady possession of the ball.
Matt whipped the ball in Allison’s direction. It landed in her net and she quickly passed it off to Kevin who pivoted his foot just once, taking his position in front of the goal. Before he could get a shot off, a Bearcat striker came careening into his hip causing him to lose his balance just for a moment. It was all they needed. The ball popped out of Kevin’s net and the opposing striker duo was on it, scooping it up and sending it sailing down the court, landing perfectly in their dealer’s net.
Because none of the Foxes were playing defense and no one was marking him.
Andrew gripped his racket harder. This would work.
She took her time, assessing the goal and the goalie in front of it. Free of obstruction, she took three steps before lifting her racket over her right shoulder. The ball was aimed to go right between his legs. Andrew brought his stick down fast, spinning it almost 180 degrees. The ball thumped against the wooden handle of his stick, giving a couple half-hearted bounces in front of his feet.
He grabbed the ball on instinct before his mind could process the save, flicking his eyes up only briefly to scope out Kevin amongst the sea of orange and green. He put all his weight in his throw, shooting the ball like a rocket down the length of the court.
Kevin caught the ball, turned around, and let go of it all in one motion. The ball was in the back of the net before the goalie even knew what happened. The Bearcats, stretched thin trying to mark all of the Foxes’ makeshift strikers, looked pissed even from Andrew’s goal.
Fans erupted– with the Foxes up two and only ten minutes to go, their cheers rained down on the stadium. Stray hands landed on Kevin’s back as the team made their way back to center court. Andrew watched as both sides lined up for what would hopefully be one last deal.
A whistle blew from the sidelines. Andrew snapped his head towards it. The Foxes were using a timeout. An exchange of players.
***
Neil’s expression was hard but he was grinning. The referee’s board shined two numbers: 10 and 4. Matt jogged off the court, clacking sticks with Neil as he made his way onto the line.
Ten minutes of play became nine, became five, became one. The Foxes fought tooth and nail to stay on offense–making as many passes as possible without a loss of possession. Despite their efforts, the Bearcats did manage to get their hands on the ball and take a few attempts on goal. Andrew was there every time, swatting the ball away and shutting down the goal as if it cost him nothing to do it.
Abby had determined that Neil did not have a concussion, or a broken nose. After a couple minutes she was finally able to get the bleeding to come to a stop, and the bruising and swelling that would marr Neil’s face for the next week or so wasn’t a reason not to play. Before Abby agreed to let him back on the court he had to promise not to get into any more brawls or back-checks, so Neil focused on playing monkey in the middle with his teammates, getting rid of the ball almost as soon as he got it, as long as it landed in another Foxes’ net.
Half of his mind was on the goal Kevin had scored in his absence, solidifying Palmetto’s win tonight. Abby’s examination room didn’t have a TV like in Wymack’s office, so Neil hadn’t known about the goal until he came back out and saw the scoreboards showing 9-7, Foxes’ favor. He would be sure to watch the replay the first chance he was alone.
Finally the whistle blew, signifying the end of the game. Neil dropped his racket, exhausted, and ran straight into Kevin’s arms; eyes closing and grip tightening as he was lifted off the ground and twirled with the sort of strength only Kevin could have after playing an entire match without substitutions.
“We fucking did it!” he half-screamed into Kevin’s face. He hugged him again, not willing to let go just yet. Over Kevin’s shoulder his eyes caught Andrew’s. His helmet was off, giving Neil a clear view to the raised eyebrow and slight smirk on Andrew’s face. Neil grinned, wider than he had all night.
Kevin looked back at where Neil’s eyes had wandered. “He shut down the goal. Just like he said he would.”
“Yeah,” Neil said. He mentally added Andrew’s goalkeeping to the list of film he needed to review tonight.
But first, he lifted his head off Kevin’s shoulder and adjusted his gaze towards him. He trailed a finger down Kevin’s cheek.
“You were amazing,” he said. “You both were. Thank you.”
The stadium was slowly emptying, the other Foxes disappeared–most likely already showering or changing out. The high from the win began to fade and Kevin’s mind cleared, the bruises on Neil’s face now staring back at him in startling clarity.
“Are you okay?” Kevin asked, gently touching Neil’s nose.
“Fine,” Neil said. “Let’s go home,” he whispered, poking his finger into Kevin’s dimple in retaliation.
Kevin, unable to do anything but say yes to Neil, grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the stadium, into the waiting sun.