Archive of Our Own

“Why’re you always fiddlin’ with that thing?”

Joey pauses the hand holding a damp cloth, but doesn’t look up from his duel disk. It really is better just to ignore him most of the time.

“Hey, I’m talking to you!”

A heavy fist slams against Joey’s bedroom wall, but that’s all. It’s been a long time since Joey’s father raised a hand against him. Not because the old drunk experienced a change of heart about beating respect into his children, but at a certain point they had both become aware that Joey would no longer take those beatings laying down and then, without any fanfare at all, they had simply stopped.

“Cost of that thing coulda paid for...” The man trails off in a series of mumbles Joey ignores. It would be easy to say that the cost of a lifetime’s worth of booze could have paid for a lot more, but what’s the point? The old man’ll get bored and leave, and then Joey can spend the rest of the night doing whatever he wants just like he always does.

“Know you’ve been working.” The man slurs.

“I paid the rent.”

Nope. Don’t snap at him like that. Just let it go. With effort, he unclenches his fingers and drops the rag on to the mattress beside him.

“More to pay than just the rent.”

Yeah your liquor you fucking annoying fucking worthless fucking shit

“Kay.”

He lets the word hang and imagines calling Yugi after this. Yugi will answer, and because it’s a few hours earlier in Egypt right now he will describe the desert sunset to Joey and he will tell some story about a friendly vendor or an interesting artifact and Joey will not talk about his father and he will not talk about work and everything will be okay, okay, okay.

“So?”

“So, what?” Joey asks, eyeing his father. It’s clear the old man’s not just going to wander away after a few meaningless jabs like he usually does, but he’s also not stupid enough to step out of the doorframe and into Joey’s room because that would be a fight. He’s put up with enough. It’s not unreasonable to say at this point that that would be a fight. Yugi might not agree but that’s why he’s not going to tell Yugi about this.

“Where is it?” His father can’t even hold his head up when he speaks. It lulls until he realizes it’s drooping and jerks it up, only for it to fall back down again as though his neck is some sort of loose spring like one of those toys at the park the kids sit on that rock back and forth and side to side.

“Where’s what?”

The answer doesn’t matter. He could be talking about Joey’s long lost rabbit for all he knows.

“They money?” His father says like it’s obvious.

“What money?”

“The money. The money that you make.”

“Piss off ya old shit.”

“The fuck’d you say to me?”

Joey stands up intending to push his father out of the doorframe and into the hallway so he can close the door. And if the old fuck falls down and passes out right there in the hallway then fuck him. Let him sleep there. Before he can, his father pulls a hand out from behind his back that Joey hadn’t noticed before because the old man is always standing like a slouch. His limbs hanging askew, half forgotten, but this time he wishes he’d been paying better attention. In the hand that had been hanging behind the old man’s back is Joey’s garden kukri most recently used to cut down a bush in the side yard the neighbor Ms. Nakamura complained was strangling her precious squash blossoms.

“Da fuck do you think you’re doing?” He asks, surprised despite himself, and the fear that comes with this new development is unhelpful but also unstoppable. More of a physical reaction than an emotional one.

“Where is it?” His father says again, voice quavering now. He’s holding the machete out in both hands like a man compelled to protect himself, yet terrified of doing so. Of course, no one is compelling him to shake down his son for a few lousy thousand yen.

“Ya want some liquor, I’ll buy you some. I was just going out.”

“Liar! You’ll leave and you won’t come back. Just like her.”

“Jesus fucking Christ.”

What his needs to do is grab his father’s wrist and give it a sharp twist. Probably wouldn’t take that much pressure the way the guy is shaking. What he is afraid of is that making any sort of move will cause his drunk dad to swing that blade and maybe he gets lucky and maybe Joey’s fingers or his face pay the price.

“I’m comin’ back. I’m goin’ to the store and then I’m comin’ right back.”

Some of the conviction on his father’s face gives way to drunk petulance, but only some.

“Why don’t you just give me the money?”

Fat fucking chance.

“Come on. You remember last time you were this drunk? The guy at the convenience store wouldn’t even sell to ya. I’ll go get it and I’ll be right back.”

His father wavers for a few seconds and then relents, letting the blade fall with a clatter to the floor. Probably getting too heavy for him anyways. The last time that fucker did physical labor, the Berlin Wall was still standing.

“Just like your mother, always gotta threaten-” He mumbles and holds his hand up in a fist to indicate how he used to get Joey’s mother to comply when she was being defiant.

Joey picks the blade up off the floor and holds it in his hands, examining it. He really should get a lock for the tool shed but then he’d have to get a key for Ms. Nakamura too and she’d know exactly why he had to lock it up.

His father is making his drunk way down the hall, back to the couch and his only friend, the TV.

Heart slowing, Joey grabs his wallet, his duel disk, his deck, jacket and backpack, and walks out the front door without realizing it would be a very long time before he ever went back.

~*~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~

Of course, his plan was never to buy liquor for his father. That was something he decided a long time ago he wasn’t going to do and which he, for the most part, had stuck too. Even so, once he’s out on the street in the cool night air a drink didn’t sound so bad. He tosses the kukri in the canal without a second thought and picks a bar a few streets down from the closest one, not wanting to make it easy for his father to find him if that asshole doesn’t actually end up passing out on the couch and decides his son is taking a little too long picking up the groceries.

His call to Yugi will have to wait until tomorrow.

The bar keepers friendly “what are you having?” Eventually turns into “we’re closing in five minutes and I think you’ve had enough.” Which is fine because by the time Joey makes it back out onto the street it’s 3am and his 8,300 yen has gone down to 243. Can’t buy much with 243 yen is what he’s thinking when he’s counting the coins and stumbles over someone’s stoop and goes down hard on his knees.

Ouch.

But don’t worry. Nothin’ to see her. Just another Wheeler stumbling out of a bar in the early morning to the surprise of absolutely no one. He gets up and walks along the street until he makes it to the canal where his mind is convinced the air will smell fresher and his head will clear faster. Man, they really shouldn’t put places that serve alcohol so close to these things. Bars should be on corners where everything is made of pillows and no 15 meter drop is waiting right outside calling to the leaving patrons with tantalizing ideas of leaning over her and staring down into the black waters below.

Joey leans so far over the guardrail, one of his feet comes off the ground before catching himself and rocking backwards onto both feet again.

Yugi. Where is Yugi and why’d he have to leave?

That’s a stupid question. Joey knows why he left and he knows it was the best thing that Yugi could have done for himself and that’s what matters most. That’s the only thing that matters.

“I miss you, man.” Joey says looking down at the water and the truth of the statement brings tears to his eyes. He’d go by Yugi’s house just to feel their connection in a physical place, but he doesn’t want to risk Gramps seeing him like this. Somewhere in his mind he knows that he’s had too much to drink, and that he is very, very angry with himself for having done so, but mostly he just feels dizzy and wants to sit down.

Tristan. Yeah, he could call Tristan, but then Tristan would ask “where’s the party?” And then the two of them would go out and find the party. Then he would end up getting so shitfaced it would make the buzz he has now look like sugar high.

He slumps onto the sidewalk and leans his back against the evenly spaced bars of the guardrail. Where is everyone tonight? Who decided that 3am is too late to be out? The air actually feels amazing. A flag advertising 'Duel Monster Cards Sold Here!' on the building across the street from him flaps in the breeze. That and the croaking of frogs in the canal and the distant hum of cars on a faraway main street that still sees traffic even at this time of night are the only sounds.

He takes out his phone and looks at Serenity’s number but only to remember that she is safe and warm in her bed. The thought makes him feel good. A few entries in his contact list above hers is a name that makes his chest ache, but it’s such a familiar and well-worn ache he barely notices any more. Tonight his fingers hover over the name. How many times has he imagined calling that number? How many scenarios has he invented in his head of confessing everything he’s ever wanted to say over the phone and then hearing her say that she’s always felt that way too? He always stops short of calling though. The truth is he’s terrified the number will be disconnected.

More tears. God, what a baby he’s being tonight.

Do it.

His finger hovers over the number. If it’s disconnected then he’ll finally know and he can simply hurl himself into the water and be done with all this.

He’s drunk, but for the record that’s a joke. Joey Wheeler wouldn’t kill himself over some dame. Some bird. Some-

He’s pushed the button. Even from his hand, he can hear the other line ringing. Oh god, he’s done it. He’s finally done it.

He raises the phone to his ear and listens to it ring, so sure she would have changed her number that it’s almost a shock to hear her recorded voice on the other end, telling him he’s reached her voice mail.

He has to clear his throat before he can speak, but even then the thick sound of tears is embarrassingly evident to him.

“Mai, I... I know...”

What does he know? What does he want to say? So many things it’s impossible to think of just one, but he’s only got until the voicemail service hangs up on him so he better decide soon.

“I just wanted to say that, for me, it’s only ever been you. You’re the only one I want Mai, and I think about you all the time. I know that things didn’t… Well, anyways. I just wanted to tell you that none a that changed the way I feel about you, and I wish every day I coulda been better to you. Better for you. Been the man you needed me to be. So, I’m sorry. And I’m sorry I never call. I want to all the time. I guess I really am a coward. But you should know, you should know that you are worth more ta me than every other woman in the world, and you deserve to be with someone who makes you feel like the queen you are. I won’t ever forget what you did for me. I love you, Mai. I love you and-” but then the beep sounds and the line goes dead and it’s probably for the best because he was getting pretty sappy there.

He closes the phone and lays his head back against the metal bars, and here’s where things get a little blurry for the night. Most of it he can remember later but between here and when he suddenly hunches over an unknown amount of time later, overcome by the need to vomit, things are a bit fuzzy.

He throws up between his shoes on the side walk once and then slumps over to the side and does it again while holding on to the bars behind him to keep from falling right into it. After that, he feels it’s probably prudent to walk for a little bit, just until he’s feeling good enough to go home.

Without any destination in mind, he walks along the canal until he finds a bench and once again gives in to the spinning feeling beneath his feet and sits down. Drinking is so stupid. He’ll never do it again. He feels awful and, worse, has a sinking suspicion that he might have actually called Mai which, now that his mind has cleared some, is unthinkable.

Leaning back on the bench he stares up at the stars until his thoughts start to make more sense and the spinning feeling abates.

Turns out he’s exactly as much of an idiot as everyone always says he is. By everyone, he means Kaiba, and so embarrassed is he by an imagined reaction Kaiba would have at seeing him drunk on a bench in low town, Joey actually thinks for a second that it must be Kaiba calling him when he feels his phone start to buzz in his pocket.

How does he know?

But it’s not Kaiba. It’s worse.

Fuck he had called her. That wasn’t just some boozy dream he’d concocted before throwing up on the pavement. Well, shit.

He answers.

“Hey.”

“Joey? Are you alright?”

“Yeah.. I, um, you didn’t listen to that, did you? Just erase it. Don’t- don’t listen to it, kay?”

 Ignoring him, and sounding like the exact mix of bemused and annoyed he always imagines when he thinks of her voice, she says, “You know, you shouldn’t drink alone. People who drink alone have a bad habit of calling their exes.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll keep that in mind.”

“But you are okay though?” She asks, and maybe it’s the concern in her voice or maybe it’s just talking to her again after all this time, but he feel more prickly tears in his eyes blurring his vision.

“Yeah, I’m fine. But, really, delete that message. Don’t listen to it.”

“I already listened to it, you ham.”

“Oh.” He doesn’t actually know what to say to that.

“Where are you?” She asks.

“Domino City.”

Same as always. Out of everyone, he’s the one who’ll never make it out of here. Maybe he should apply for a position at Kaiba corp.

“No I mean where in Domino City?”

Joey sits up on the bench.

“Are you here?”

“Just tell me where you are.”

 So he does, as close as he can anyways based on the street signs visible from the bench. His drunken wandering has taken him to a place he can’t easily recognize in the dark. When she hangs up, he’s got nothing to do but sit on the bench and wait. She hadn’t actually said she was coming but, then, why ask him where he is? The tension of waiting is unbearable. More than once he stands up and paces around the bench just for something to do. If anyone looked outside their window and saw him, they might think it’s very strange to see a man pacing outside their house in the dead of night. He goes and stands in an alleyway between two buildings where the streetlights don’t reach to feel less exposed.

Throwing up and now the pacing have cleared his head, but he almost wishes they hadn’t. The nervous energy of maybe seeing Mai again is driving him crazy. Despite his earlier promise to himself, he wouldn’t mind having another drink just now, but settles for a strip of old gum he finds squished under the duel disk in his backpack. He chews it like a hyper dog with a squeaky toy and taps his hand against the brick wall to his right as he watches the empty street for any sign of headlights.

Finally, they appear, and he steps out of the alley just as Mai’s purple convertible rolls slowly down the street.

She’s pulling off onto the curb when she catches him spitting out his gum on the street and say his name like she’s appalled. Chastised, he picks it up and puts it in his pocket.

“What are you, an animal?” She asks while he’s still busy taking her in. She looks stunning of course, always, but especially so tonight in a tightfitting, long and sparkly sequined dress, a large string of fashion pearls around her neck, and heels that make her as tall as him.

“Woof.” He says.

Should he hug her? He can’t decide. He wants to, but...

“Well, are you just going to stand there and stare at me?”

“I don’t know. I kinda never thought I’d see you again.”

“Well, here I am.”

“How long have you been in the city?”

She crosses her arms.

“What is this, an inquisition?”

“Nah. Just wondering.”

To combat some of the awkwardness, he holds out an arm and waves her over, unable to suppress a smile. Seeing her again just feels too good.

“Come on. Come ‘ere. Come give your pal Joey a hug.”

On her face, he sees a smile start to slip past her mask of annoyance and she shuffles over to him in her heels, arms still crossed, letting him pull her into a hug in the middle of the empty sidewalk. For a moment there’s tension and then he feels her relax against his chest. They stay like that for as long as she’ll let him, but eventually she pulls her face away from his shirt and, frowning, says, “You smell like an alley cat.”

“That’s the smell of a man.”

“Men do not smell like that.” She scoffs.

“Well, what do ya want? I had a bad night.”

“Obviously.”

Mai looks at him closely. She’s too tough to show outright concern, but he knows. He can see it in her face and tries to arrange his feature in a way that makes him look stoic and tough, but isn’t sure he succeeds.

“Are you really okay?” She asks him.

“Yeah. Of course.”

“I heard Yugi’s travelling abroad.”

“He is. He needed some time away and who can blame him.”

“Sure. And you’re alright?”

“It was that concerning, huh. What I said? I mean, I know I've been drinking, but I remember it being at least a little romantic.”

Mai gives a surprised laugh as if his words have caught her off guard and pulls away from the hug so she can run her hands over her styled hair.

“Romantic.” She says like she wants to try the word out for herself. And then again, almost like a question. “Romantic.”

“Yeah, you know. Like the movies or somethin’.”

He trying to make her smile, and succeeds, but she continues to look past him and won’t meet his eyes.

“Oh, Joey. Why would you say all those things?”

“Because they’re true.”

“No.” She shakes her head.

“Yes they are.”

He tries to move so she has to look at him but she turns her head away actively avoiding meeting his eyes.

“No, they’re not.”

“They are.”

Frustrated by her denials, he puts his hands on her cheeks and gently encourages her to look at him until she finally complies. There are unspilled  tears in her eyes.

“Why would you say that?” She asks again and it’s starting to make him a little frustrated.

“Because I love you Mai.”

“No.”

The tears in her eyes have started to spill onto her cheeks and he wipes them away.

“It’s true. You might not feel the same way, but I do, Mai. I love you.”

Through her tears she looks at him and he’s struck again by how stupid he’s been not calling her. Close to her like this, it’s so obvious she feels the same way about him. It always is when they’re together. But then she inevitability takes off again, and inevitability he starts second guessing himself, starts to rewrite his own history and believe he was just imagining the way she looks at him. He’s not imagining this.

After every day dream and vivid fantasy he’s ever had about doing this, it’s surprisingly nerve wracking to close the last bit of distance between them and press his lips against hers. She’s all bitter lipstick and floral scents and kissing her feels better than every duel he’s ever played. Even the ones he won. Kissing her is the last and only thing he ever wants to do for the rest of his life, and he might go a little far with it because she lets out a small yelp of surprise when he pushes he back into the open door of her car and it sways under their weight, but he’s not going to let that stop him. Without breaking the kiss he reaches behind her to slam the door closed and then his arms are around her waist and under her butt, pulling her up against him until she’s resting all of her weight on him and wrapping her legs around his waist and putting her hands in his hair and now they’re really getting somewhere, yet somehow it’s still not enough.

She pulls away and takes a deep breath and Joey’s actually grateful because he never would have been able to stop but also needed a few deep breaths of his own to keep his head. When he goes back in for another kiss, she stops him with her hand on his mouth. The tears have dried up and she’s smiling.

“Woah there big boy, maybe this isn’t the best place for that.”

He looks pointedly both ways down the empty street and then says from behind her palm, “There’s no one for miles.”

“Oh please.” She nods up towards the windows of the surrounding houses.

“Aww, c’mon. They don’t care.”

Joey tries to maneuver her hand away but she doesn’t budge so he gathers all the spit in his mouth and lets it dribble onto her palm.

“Gross! Goddammit Joey.”

She’s wiping her hand on his shirt now and her mouth is wide open for kisses, but he’s so amused by what he’s done and her reaction that he can’t help laughing.

“Oaf.” She says, but doesn’t sound very angry.

“I’m sorry.” He says but, still laughing, doesn’t sound very sincere. “Here. I know a place.”

He bends her backwards, far over the edge of the door of her topless car until her hair is pooling in the center console so he can reach around the steering wheel to grab her keys out of the ignition. Then he pulls her back against his chest and lifts her up again so he’s carrying her.

“What place?” She asks, suspicious.

“It’s a nice place, you’ll like it.”

It’s the alleyway where he was waiting for her to arrive and it’s the perfect place; out of view of the windows and out of reach of the street lights.

With her back against the wall and her legs around his waist, he lifts her sequined dress up just far enough to feel excited by the prospect of lifting it even further but doesn’t want to push his luck. The way her heels are pressing into the soft muscle of his butt and upper thighs through his jeans is doing enough for him anyways. That and the delicate scent of her perfume and soft give of her lips against his. He’s torn between wanting to take it further and put his tongue inside her mouth and not wanting to make a mistake and give away the fact that he’s never actually done this before; outside of his dreams, that is. If he knew exactly what she wanted, he’d give it to her a thousand times over. When she starts tugging on his hair to pull his their faces even closer together, he obliges and presses her fully against the wall, one hand behind her head to prevent it from rubbing against the brick and the other one gripping her thigh like it’s a precious treasure he’s afraid of dropping.

Like this, there’s no disguising his excitement where it’s pressing against her lower stomach and the sharp outline of her hips, but judging by how hard her heel is digging into his ass to keep him from pulling away, she doesn’t seem to mind. Every second spent kissing Mai like this could make up for a thousand of the ones they’d spent suffering before it. For him at least. If there’s any way to make that the case for her as well, he’ll never stop until he finds it. Maybe it’s under her dress. His hand slides up her thigh a little further just to check.  

In the end, the first one to add their tongue into the mix is her and when he feels it sliding past his lips and touching his own, he pulls away with regret. The warm feeling now spreading from his stomach down to his groin makes continuing the kiss like that a risk. If he’s not careful, he’s going to make exactly the kind of fool out of himself he always pretty much assumed he would if something like this ever happened between them. Feeling incredibly hot and overwhelmed, he buries his head in her neck and groans, rubbing his hips against hers in a way that does nothing to improve his chances of lasting longer but which makes him feel so good he doesn’t have to mental control to make himself stop.

Surrounded by the intoxicating scent of her hair, he kisses her neck where her skin is so soft, and when she responds with a gasp, tightening the hand in his hair, he does it again with more confidence, licking under her jaw and up to her ear and celebrating internally when that makes her moan and squirm in his arms.

The ecstasy of being with her will certainly kill him - burn him straight into the ground, a pile of ash and cinders – but first, he’s going to ring every last pleasurable sound out of her that he can.

When his kisses move up her neck and his tongue eventually finds the inner curve of her ear, she says his name in a way that will surely fuel his jacking-off fantasies for the rest of eternity and spreads her legs wider, giving his body full access to every curve of hers blocked only by the layers of clothes between them.

Feeling her tap his shoulder, he stops exploring her ear with some regret, but that feeling vanishes when he gets a good look at her face. She looks flustered and excited in all the ways he feels flustered and excited, and the thought that maybe her body is feeling the same pleasure his own is sends another wave of warm desire through him.

In the still alley there’s no sounds but the harsh exhales of his breath and the racing beat of his heart in his chest pounding away like the frantic patter of rain in a storm.

Now he’s smiling again and when she sees it, she smiles too. Smeared lipstick and sparkling eyes making her easily top contender for most beautiful being to have ever existed.

“Do you have a condom?” She whispers, like she’s afraid they’ll be overheard.

Joey’s stomach drops, and not in a pleasant way. Shit. He doesn’t. Because of course he doesn’t. He is girlfriendless virgin with half a social life and an 100 hour work week. The last time he had even considered sex as a possibility had been before he got involved in all that shit with Yugi. And even then it’d been nothing but a pipe dream. Turns out girls aren’t actually that interested in guys who hang out with street gangs. Not the girls he was interested in at least.

Feeling like a piece of shit for falling short of the kind of mature man Mai needs him to be, again, he says dejectedly, “No. Fuck.”

It’s almost laughable, really. Almost.

“Figured it was a long shot.” She says and, amazingly, she’s still smiling. “Oh well. We’ll use one next time and call it good.”

With a wink, she brushes her lips against his teasingly, although he can tell she’s looking for some sort of affirmation for what she’s suggesting.

“Are you sure?” He asks, hating to think to think he’s putting her in any sort of position, and yet on fire with the idea of what she’s suggesting. That they take this further, all the way, something he'd be up for any time, any circumstances, but not unless she’s absolutely sure too.

“Are you sure?” She asks like she’s making fun of him. “What if I get pregnant?”

“Great.” He says without considering. She scoffs.

“Well too bad. I’m on the pill you dolt.”

Oh, right. Duh. Lady stuff. Well, in that case… but there’s still something on his mind.

“Mai.” He stops her just as she’s about to start kissing him again.

She says, “It’s alright if you don’t want to. I won’t be offended.”

She nuzzles her nose lightly against his cheek as she talks and, if anything, the thought that he wouldn’t want to is offensive to him. You’d think his hard dick digging into her hips would be proof enough of that.

“‘Course I want to. I just think maybe you should know before, that uh...”

“Spit it out Wheeler.”

“That I’ve never done this before.” He spits it out. Then, when she doesn’t respond adds, “I mean, I’m a quick study, but I figured I’d say something in case, you know, it’s not good. Okay, now it’s your turn to say somethin’.”

She’s looking at him like his words have caught her completely off guard which is not exactly the reaction he was hoping for.

“I, uh, really? You?”

“Yeah. What’s so funny about that?”

“Nothing funny, honey. But... You know you’re really good looking, right? And the whole schtick with your sister. Please, I don’t believe that no girl ever…”

He’s not offended by her implication that his relationship with Serenity is a ruse to pick up chicks, that’s just Mai’s sense of humor, but the idea that he’d lie about something like this, to her of all people.

“You think I’m lyin’?”

“No. I’m just… surprised is all.”

“Well, you don’t know all the things about the kind of person I used to be before I met you. I ain’t always been such a nice guy.”

“Now that I don’t believe.” She smiles and presses a light kiss against his lips. As if she’s telling some sort of unbelievable tale she says, “Joey Wheeler the asshole who drove all the nice girls away.”

“You got no idea.” He says, choosing to look at her lips rather than her eyes when he does.

“Well, if that’s true... I guess I’m glad I met you when I did.”

She kisses him again. None of that teasing stuff either, a real kiss where her tongue finds his right off the bat and they play with each other as if this is something they’d been doing together for years. Now her hand is making its way from his hair down to his chest and then sides until it finds where his shirt is tucked into the waistband of his pants and starts tugging. Switching out the hand he’s using to hold her up, his free one worms its way into the nonexistent space between their bodies and works open his belt, then his button and fly.

All the while, Mai kisses him in ways that make his body feel like it’s not quite under his control anymore. If her tongue in his mouth can make his cock throb, and her nails running up his untucked shirt and then down the bare skin of his back can make his stomach clench with desire, then what else is she capable of? Complete control over him for one thing, that’s for sure. He lets her use his mouth however she wants as he focuses on wriggling his pants and boxers down to his knees. Once that’s done, the reality of being half naked in front of her starts to set in. He pulls her dress up, breaking away from the kiss so he can glance down and see exactly how good his dick rubbing against her lacy underwear and the lower part of her stomach looks.

Pretty fucking good. So good he could do just this all night. Rut against her stomach and watch precum drip from the tip of his dick onto her perfect skin.

“Joey, focus.”

“Yeah.”

Unwilling to disentangle long enough to get her panties all the way off, his plan is just to pull them to the side. Easy enough, but when his fingers find their way between her thighs and he realizes how wet Mai is down there, a headrush not unlike the one he had earlier leaning over the canal railing threatens to bring this whole thing to an early end. Electric heat, so at odds with the chilly night air around them, awakens something untamed inside of him. Unable to stop himself, his fingers do more than pull her underwear to the side. They run across her smooth vulva, exploring, and his mouth returns to her neck, licking it with a renewed desire to make her moan as she had before. Fulfilling a decade’s worth of fantasies and daydreams, his fingers find their way easily inside her just as his teeth nibble harmlessly on the sensitive skin on her neck. She moans into his shoulder, the hand on his back digging its nails into his skin in a way that makes him give his own answering groan as the two fingers he’s got inside of her slip in even further.

“You’re so wet.” He says helplessly.

“Joey, please.”

“Yeah, alright.”

He knows what she wants him to do, and to not do it now when she’s practically begging for it would be world-class level stupidity. He pulls his fingers out, slow and little regretfully, but safe in the knowledge that they will find their way back in the again, someday, somehow.

Leaning back against the brick wall far enough to give Joey some room to see what he’s doing, Mai closes her eyes and lets her head fall back as Joey lines himself up and presses into her. Holding her butt to keep her from slipping down the wall with one hand and using the other to both position himself and keep her underwear to the side, he wills himself to feel and remember every tight warm inch. Impossible, and yet it feels like he can in the moment. Like he will never, ever forgot a single second of how this feels.

What had he been thinking earlier? That being with her like this would burn him into a pile of ash? Yes, and he’s more sure than ever that it’s true. Not in his whole life can he remember ever being this turned on - and there’s a very long list of such occasions to draw from - but nothing has ever been like this. It’s like he’s been on the edge of an orgasm since they started kissing, and now his lower stomach and balls and dick are all hot and tight with pleasure intense enough it could wipe away every thought in his brain if he let it. He won’t let it. His body is saying one thing, but he’s not going just let it do whatever it wants. Especially when what it wants is to hump Mai like he’s fifteen again and she’s his poor, abused mattress; that, and to cum inside of her. That want is so powerful it’s like a religious fervor. But she’s not a mattress and he’s not an animal so he settles for pressing into her as far as he can and resting his body weight on her and the wall behind her while he tries to get his thoughts on straight.

“Joey? Are you alright? You’re shaking.”

“Yeah, m’fine. I...”

He is shaking. Little tremors in his arms which could be contributed to holding Mai’s weight, but also he doesn’t really think that’s it.

“Okay, well, take your time I guess.”

He lets out a huff that’s almost, but not quite, a laugh. Not that he’s offended. If he couldn’t put up with Mai’s tough humor they wouldn’t have gotten this far.

“Alright. Alright. Don’t want to keep you waiting.”

Except maybe he’s going to have to. Adjusting her weight again, he puts his free hand against the wall and rocks his hips as non-disruptively as he can, but the feeling of sliding out of her and the way she clenches when he slips back in sends a jolt of pleasure from the tip of his dick to the base of his balls and he has stop again or risk losing control. It’s just, the inside her pussy is so tight. Warm. Perfect. He can’t stand it. He really isn’t going to be able to do this at all.

Groaning far too loud in the still night air he says, “Oh, fuck. I’m gonna cum.”

Mai’s hand with its stylishly filed nails finds its way to his hair again and the tips of her fingers run along his scalp. He’s certain he must be sweating despite the cold temperature. His hair feels damp all over with it.

“Shhh. Just look at me.” She says softly so he does. “Just relax.”

Her hand continues to rub against the back of his scalp and something about it and her soft, calm voice makes him want to tell her about what had happened earlier in the evening with his father. The thought is so jarring and unwanted he shoves it away as quick as he can.

“Take your time.” She says again, but it no longer sounds like she’s teasing. “It’s alright.”

She tugs him forward into another kiss and this one’s the best yet. His tongue finds its way into her mouth easily, and he gets to experience what it is to be trusted completely by such an incredible person. She lets him explore her mouth just as she’s let him be inside her, and he tries, he really does, to make it last but once he starts moving, the feelings of pleasure become too intense and there’s nothing he can do to stop his body from moving in all the ways it wants to chase that pleasure all the way to its end.

A minute. Is it at least a minute? Oh, god. He hopes it’s at least a minute, but probably not much longer than that

“Mai. Oh, fuck, Mai.”

With a whimper he wishes could have maybe sounded a little more masculine but oh well, Joey orgasms as intensely as he can ever remember having done, never before having had the motivation to hold it off for as long as he just did. Still overcome with the knowledge that he is inside her and that he is cumming inside Mai, he holds her tightly, caught up in a rush of physical sensations mixed with emotion. If he hadn’t been shaking before, he is now. It’s only the weight of the woman he loves in his arms and her trust that he won’t drop her keeping him on his feet.

Oblivious to his shame at what he imagines must have been an absolutely mediocre performance for her, Mai continues to kiss him, and, unwilling to let the moment slip away just like that, Joey pushes his now softening dick as far back into her as he can and enjoys the way it makes her hum against his lips.

Speaking into her mouth between kisses he says, “Give me one minute and we’ll go again.”

This makes her laugh almost as inappropriately as loud as he had groaned just seconds ago.

“That sounds swell, Joey. But you know, I should probably get at least one hour of sleep tonight.”

Oh, yeah. What time is it? With surprise, he realizes that he can hear birds singing. How long before the early commuters start waking up and discover a little more than they wanted to see on their morning walk past this alley.

He rests his forehead against hers, still unwilling to pull out yet.

“We’ve got time.”

Firmly, she says. “Don’t spoil it.”

With a sigh, he lets her go and sets her on her own feet, feeling an aching relief in his hips once her weight is off of them. Though not enough relief to make up for how complete he had felt emotionally with her weight on them. He pulls up his pants and, like with the birds, is surprised to realize he can see more details of the alley than he could before. The sun is starting to come up.

“You’ve got my keys right?” She asks.

He pats his pockets and hands them over. It feels like a lifetime has passed since he pulled them out of her car’s ignition.

“Well get in, big boy. I’ll drive you home.”

~*~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~

Outside of the apartment he’s called home for the last twelve years, Joey watches from the passenger seat of Mai’s car as Ms. Nakamura tends to her squash blossoms in the early morning light.

“You know, you were only sixteen when I fell in love with you.”

He looks at Mai in surprise. It’s the first thing either of them have said since getting in the car and isn’t at all what he was expecting.

“So? Wait, how old are-”

She puts her finger right in his face and says, “Joey Wheeler, if I were you I would not finish that sentence.”

“Hey, you brought it up.”

“Well just forget I said anything. Are you gonna sit here all day or what? I told you I need my beauty sleep.”

“I’m not going back there.”

“Hmm?”

“I’m not going back. I’m coming with you, Mai. Wherever you are, that’s where I need to be.”

He had pretty much made up his mind in the alley the second he saw her car pull up, but had wanted to come back one last time to be sure. Now he’s sure.

“Oh, please. Be real.”

“I’m being real, Mai. This is as real as it gets. I want to be with you and I don’t care where that is. I’m not going to let you slip away again.”

Not to mention he’s got his pride to consider. That performance is not what she is going to remember him by.

“What about your family? Your job? Your friends?”

“You’re still not gettin’ it. You’re what matters. Bein’ with you is what matters. My friends will understand that and so will Serenity. I can always get another job.”

“What about your father? Don’t you live with him?”

“No. He died.”

She looks at him like she knows it’s not true but doesn’t push it.

“Joey, I know it sounds great and all, but here’s what’s actually going to happen. You’re going to spend a few weeks with me and then you’re going to get bored and you’re going to hate all the travel and you’re going to resent me for all the tournaments and the networking and the parties and then we’re going to fight and we’re going to say awful, terrible things to one another. Take it from me, kid, you’ll end up right back here anyways so why don’t you just go inside.”

“How ‘bout you let me make my own decisions, huh? You never know. I might surprise ya.”

He winks and she rolls her eyes.

“Fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

She turns the car back on with a low rumble and puts it in drive.

“Really? Thought you’d need more convincing than that.”

“Well, what do you want Wheeler? It’s a cold world. A girl gets lonely out there sometimes.”

“Not anymore. Not with me around.”

“Pfft. Alright, Casanova. Let’s go then. I’ve got places to be after all, can’t be hanging around this dump all day.”

“Yeah. Me neither.”

~*~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~~*~*~*~

In the heart of Domino City where the buildings stand fifty stories high and a valet takes Mai's keys without comment, she leads him quickly through a hotel lobby with gold chandeliers and paintings as tall as a small house. The real reason she didn’t want to go for round two reveals itself when they get to her room and she herds him straight into the bathroom for a shower. He hadn’t thought he smelled that bad, but come to think of it he’s not sure when the last time he did laundry was, and he had worn this shirt at his last shift as mall mascot so maybe she was on to something. In the swanky hotel bathroom with its full-sized bath and separate shower, Mai undresses him efficiently, telling him to lift his arms so she can pull his shirt off and drop his pants, but she doesn’t stick around after he’s naked. Bundling the clothes into her arms she disappears from the bathroom, leaving him to fiddle with the unfamiliar knobs on the shower.

The whole setup is amazing, especially once he figures out which knob controls the warm water. Theres no showerhead, the water comes out of a panel in the ceiling like rain, but there are several faucet-like things in the wall which, he finds out through experimentation, also shoot out warm water.

This is really great actually. As soon as he’s in there, he starts cleaning himself off to what he hopes are her high standards. He’s going to make up for his earlier performance, and then they’re going to fall asleep together and spend the whole day together and maybe order some room service too if she’s got the money for it, but if she doesn’t, oh well. He’d just as soon starve if it meant he could spend a whole day in bed with Mai, all cuddled up together, naked even.

By the time she returns, he’s half-hard, excited by his thoughts and soaped up with the fragrant contents of a bottle he found on the shower’s wood bench.

Her hands are empty.

“Where’d my clothes go?” He asks through the glass door of the shower, kind of worried she might have thrown them out despite the fact he has nothing to replace them with.

“I gave them to the bell boy to wash, and let me tell you he did not look happy about it.”

“They’re gonna wash my clothes? Damn this place is fancy.”

Joey’s too busy scrubbing soap off his face to notice the way she pauses while removing her necklace to look at him. Placing it on the bathroom counter, she unzips her dress and lets it fall to the floor in a sparkling purple puddle. She knocks on the glass.

“Room for one more?”

Heart racing, Joey says yes and clears the soap out of his eyes under the cascading water as fast as he can. When he finally gets them open and takes a look at Mai, he’s not disappointed. In fact, it’s everything else he ever sees from this moment on in his life which is going to disappoint him; if only because nothing else in the entire world could compare to what he’s seeing right now.

“You’re so beautiful.”

“Oh, stop it.”

Coming even closer to him, she steps under the falling water and it pours over her hair and head, smudging her makeup.

“No I’m serious. You’re the most beautiful person in the world.”

He wants to touch her - oh god, how he wants to touch her - but he’s afraid. Never does the idea of being out of his depth scare him so much as it does when he’s fighting for his life trying to impress Mai Valentine.

She closes her eyes and lifts her head to the ceiling, letting the water hit her face and run down her body. At his sides, Joey’s fingers twitch with the thought of getting to touch her breasts, but he doesn’t want ruin the moment either. Getting to look at them completely uncovered like this is treat enough. What if he pisses her off and she covers them?

Watching her tilt her head to the side and run her nails through her hair like combs is like watching a piece of art come to life. The last of the soap on his body runs lazily down his legs forgotten.

“Are you done already? I can’t imagine you got all clean on your first try.”

Her voice has a teasing lilt to it, and the way she says ‘all clean’ sends his mind racing with improper thoughts of her hands on him, washing him, making sure she doesn’t miss a single spot. She’s right. He hasn’t gotten clean at all, in fact he feels very, very dirty.

“Uh.” He says, wanting to sound cool and casual like her but incapable of coherent thought as all the blood leaves his brain and travels down to other parts of his body. This doesn’t seem to bother Mai at all as she pops open the top of one of the other bottles and squirts out the viscous liquid from it onto her hand.

“Cat got your tongue?”

“Yeah,” Or something.

Transfixed, he watches as she spreads the soap between her hands and then starts rubbing it on her arms, chest, and stomach.

“Holy shit, Mai.”

“What?”

“Nothin’ I mean. It’s just. Your body.”

“Thanks. You’re not so bad either, handsome.”

He scoffs. If she thinks that what he’s got is anything compared to her, she’s has a very inaccurate self-image.

She passes the bottle to him and he takes the hint and starts soaping himself up again.

“You know, I do shower pretty regularly.” He says feeling the need to defend himself some.

She pauses in the middle of rubbing another different soap through the tips of her long hair and looks at him in an intense way that makes him feel like he’s  being scrutinized.

“I’m not trying to be nosy or anything, Joey, but when was the last time you were around other people? I mean really around other people.”

“What are you gettin’ at? I’m around other people all the time. I practically live at the mall, and when I’m not there, I’m at the cannery and-”

“No, not work. I mean real people. People that care about you.”

“I saw Tristan just... Well, I guess it was like two weeks ago.”

It hadn’t felt like that long, but he knows it was because he’d been pulling double shifts since the beginning of the month. It’d been even longer since he’d seen Serenity. In fact, the only person outside of work he’d actually seen in the past few weeks had been his father, but that hardly fits the description of ‘people who care about him.’

“Well, anyways, it doesn’t matter now.” Mai says and she reaches out to brush some of the remaining soap off his chest. “Forget I said anything.”

Under the warm water she leans up to kiss him and he brings his hand to her face as he kisses her back, feeling grateful for her presence in ways he can’t fully grasp, let alone articulate.

He thinks about breaking their kiss to ask if she’s up for going again, but then figures he’ll just make his intentions clear and let Mai put a stop to it if that’s what she wants. She’ll tell him, too, if he’s doing anything to annoy her. It’s a trait that makes her one of the easiest people in the world to get along with and understand, and god help him if anyone tells her different while he’s standing there. Hed clock them right in the face.

“Joey!”

She breaks the kiss to let out a surprised yelp as he grabs her bare, wet ass with both hands and squeezes.

“Sorry.”

No he’s not. He squeezes again and pulls her body tight against him pinning his growing erection between them, still certain he’s going to last longer this time despite the way having her naked body pressed against him is making him feel.

“I guess you weren’t kidding when you said you could go again.”

“Baby, I could go all night.” He says, nuzzling her ear under the running water and thinking he sounds pretty cool, but it only makes her laugh.

“Maybe so, but it’s not night time anymore.”

“Good, even better. There’s more hours during the day.”

She laughs again.

“I guess.”

Having her slippery and pressed up against him while he leans down to kiss her shoulders and neck is unbelievable. Nervous about picking her up, unsure he’d be able to keep his grip with all this soap still on them, he sits on the shower bench instead, and pulls her onto his lap with him where her tight stomach can continue to rub against his erection while they kiss.

It’s too hard to say her name when she sucking on his tongue so he just thinks it over and over again in his mind. The feeling of her thighs spread on either side of his own is a siren song for his hips which want to grind up and against her urgently. He pulls her in as tightly as he can, helpless to stop himself from rubbing his dick against her stomach. One of her hands, with it’s filed, sharp nails makes its way to his hair, running along his scalp in an enticing way he can feel all the way down to his balls, and he finally breaks their kiss to let out an appreciative moan. Still rocking his hips against hers he blinks away the water dripping off his hair and into his eyes.

“Mai, I’m gonna put it in you again.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, and it’s gonna be better this time, I promise.”

“Is that so? That’s quite the promise, Wheeler. Sure you can back it up?”

Bringing her hand to his face she squeezes his cheek playfully between her fingers.

Joey nods, cheek still in her hand, but even as he does he continues sliding his erection against her, sabotaging himself and yet helpless to stop. Squeezed between their soapy stomachs is the second best place his dick has ever been.

Fortunately she senses his helplessness and braces her knees against the seat, lifting her hips. Empty of rational thoughts, Joey watches transfixed as Mai guides him in, holding her sharp nails carefully so they don’t poke either of them. Once she’s certain he won’t slip out, she pulls her hand away and sinks down until she’s resting all of her weight on him again. With her eyes closed and her head tilted back she gives an experimental roll of her hips that draws a sound out of Joey he’s not sure he’s ever made before.

“Don’t move.” She says firmly, and he whimpers but does his best to do as she says.

Mai’s told him not to and that’s enough to keep his hips from matching hers when she lifts them up and lowers them back down, riding him, but even still he’s overwhelmed by the sensation of what she’s doing. It feels like she’s using him. Using him to make herself feel good, and, god, does he want to be used like that, but what she’s doing isn’t just pleasing to her. Panting with the effort of staying still, Joey takes his hand off her back and pushes it against the wall of the shower as hard as he can, trying to ground himself in something that isn’t her body.

“Shh. You’re doing so good. Just relax.” She says, riding his dick leisurely. Clearly not in a hurry, she ignores the way her back and forth motion is making his knees tremble.

If she thinks that talking like that and stroking his hair is helping his plight in any way, she’s sorely mistaken, but it’s Mai and he has so, so much to make up for with her, stretching way past just this morning.

“Mai, please.” He finally gets out, surprised the words are even understandable; it feels like his voice is reaching new, unexplored octaves today.

“What is it, honey?”

Still teasing, always teasing. Without pausing the rolling motion of her hips she leans in to kiss his slack lips.

“Use-use me. Please.”

He can feel her smiling against his lips.

“Whatever you say, lover boy.” She reaches down to his hand on the bench and brings it to her breast like she wants him to touch it. Looking on with awe, he watches as his fingers squeeze against where she’s placed them, leaving indents in her wet skin. He moves his thumb to her nipple and rubs. Not entirely sure how she’ll react, but not disappointed. When she sighs gratefully and clenches around him, he lets out his own answering groan.

There’s a heat inside him crying out, begging for more. Begging for him to move, to fuck, to finish inside her, but he ignores it, focused on how badly he doesn’t want to be selfish when it comes to her. Not that she’s going to make it easy on him. While he pinches her nipple gently, looking for just the right amount of pressure to make her gasp again and trying not to think too much about how big and heavy and utterly perfect her breast feels under his hand, she leans forward and whispers in his ear.

“It’s okay, Joey. You can cum if you want to. I won’t stop.”

“Mai.”

Her words light up his insides like fire. Spreading through him, they burn away his resolve and replace it with hungry desire. One hand still playing with her nipple, he takes the other one off the wall and uses it to hold her under her butt, taking her weight off his hips just far enough off that he can start moving his own. Thrusting up into her up into her, he meets her languid movements with his own less finessed and more urgent ones. Despite telling him to stay still earlier, she’s happy enough to let him do the work now. One of her hands slides between their stomachs and down to her crotch where she starts moving it rapidly. Realizing she’s sitting right on top of him touching herself, matching his frantic movements with her own, he lets out a tortured groan. He own orgasm is already here, creating a familiar tightness in his hips, filling his body with a pleasure fierce enough to block out everything else, but he doesn’t give in easy. He wants this to be good for her too much. It’s too important.

“Mai, baby.” He pleads, still doing the best to match the skillful movements of her hips and utterly failing.

When she says his name in reply, he’s amazed to here similar urgency in her own voice.

“Joey, that’s it. Yes. Just like that.”

It the middle of the longest and most intense orgasm of his life, Joey grips Mai’s ass without any concern for how rough he’s being and pistons his hips up into her. Groaning far too loudly for the small space, he can still hear her saying there, there, there just before he loses a hard fought battle and finishes inside her exactly as he’d been fantasizing earlier. His orgasm overtakes him, and he cries out her name into the steamy shower stall, fucking her even as he cums. Lost in the feeling her pussy around him and her skin against him and her breast in his hand for an unknown an extraordinarily pleasant amount of time.

Even when the most intense part of his orgasm fades, he’s overcome by spasmy aftershocks that keep him from focusing on anything else. When he’s finally able to pay attention again, he realizes that Mai has slumped against him, her head on his shoulder and her body a heavy weight pushing him down into the bench. She’s taken her hand and threaded its fingers through the one he was holding her breast with, and now they’re holding each other’s hands.

Disappointed in himself he lets out a pathetic, old-dog sigh and says, “I fucked it up again.”

She lets out a barking laugh in response that he can feel against his softening dick still inside her.

“If that’s your idea of fucking up, I can’t wait to see what you consider a good time.”

She sits up to look at him, but he doesn’t want to meet her eyes.

“I wanted it to be better for you.”

Again she laughs but this one is more of a gentle thing. She pulls her hand out of his and holds it up so they can both see it trembling.

“Joey I think that might be the first time a man has ever made me cum with just his dick inside me. Now either you’re that good or I am just that into you.”

Or you’ve been dating all the wrong guys, Joey thinks but doesn’t say. Her compliment is filling him with a warm feeling of pride and he doesn’t want to spoil it.

“Really, you came?”

“Yes now stop asking about it. You’re going to make me blush.”

Fat chance, but he doesn’t ask again.

She makes like she’s going to get off of him but he pulls her back down before she can.

“No wait, just five more minutes. The water’s still warm.”

“This is a hotel Joey, the waters always warm, and I’ve got a feeling that if we stay like this another five minutes, you’ll want to go again.”

Yes. Exactly.

He pulls her tight and presses his nose against her wet hair.

“One more minute?”

“Oh my god. Aren’t you tired?”

No actually. For the first time in a long time he’s full of energy. Not just physical energy either, this energy feels like it has purpose; something he hadn’t even been aware he was missing for so long until he starting feeling it again.

But it’s not a battle he’s going to win, and eventually she does stand up and turn the water off. Almost immediately he’s feeling cold and ready to dry off.

Back in bed, Mai lays naked on the starchy sheets. He can tell she’s tired, falling asleep talking to him while he kisses her body, but he’s unable to stop. Each new stretch of skin his lips find calls to him as fervently as the last.

“You could come with me.”

“Mmm, okay.” He says without paying much attention to what he’s agreeing to.

“The worst are the really hot countries. Makes my hair so frizzy.”

He’s made it all the way down to her ankles and he lifts one onto his shoulder so he can kiss her leg, taking full advantage of a perfect view he’s never going to get tired of.

“Hot’s fine. I look great in shorts.”

“Are you listening, Joey? I said I don’t like hot places. Oh well, not that it matters. Kaiba’s going to send me wherever he wants anyways.”

Having made it all the way up to her inner thigh, Joey pauses his kisses.

“Kaiba?”

She doesn’t answer right away, and he sits up between her legs. She’s making a face.

“I know,” she says, but he doesn’t think that’s likely. Most days, he barely knows himself what he thinks about that guy. “But you wouldn’t believe the deal his company offered me to rep their league. I guess after Yugi left the game they were hard pressed for talent. I’m surprised they didn’t try to hire you. You know, you’re kind of a legend in the pro circles these days.”

“Must have missed that call.” Joey says, and he can hear the unhappiness in his voice when he does. Annoyed Kaiba has somehow infiltrated even this the most perfect day of his life, he sighs and shakes his head.

“Never mind. Let’s not talk about him right now.”

He intends to continue his attentions to her thigh where he left off until she says, “All of this is just talk of course. I don’t suppose you really want to leave the country with me. What about your father?”

Welp, there goes the last of his libido. He crawls up the bed and flops down onto the pillows next to her.

“I told you. He died.”

“Oh please, Joey, I know that’s not true. I just talked to Serenity two days ago. I think she would have mentioned that.”

“You talked to Serenity?”

“Of course, we talk all the time. She’s like a little sister to me.”

“She’s my little sister. And she never told me she talks to you.”

“Well, we have a ladies’ agreement to never mention you so that’s probably why. You know, she does have some relationships outside of her big brother.”

“I guess so.”

“Oh, don’t pout.”

“I’m not pouting.”

Mai rolls on her side so she can snuggle against him. If he had been pouting, it’s certainly not something he can keep up with her naked body pressed against his.

She sighs into his chest as he wraps his arms around her.

Tickling his chest hair with her breath she says, “It doesn’t matter now anyways. Just try to get some sleep. We’ll have to get up eventually and go shopping before tonight, you can’t be hanging off my arm at the promo party in jeans.”

“Ohh a fancy party, huh. That’s exactly my kinda gig. Where’s it going to be?”

He asks because he’s fairly sure he knows what the answer’s going to be, and he isn’t disappointed.

“Kaiba Tower.”

Joey groans.

“Don’t be like that. He’s not even going to be there. He never comes to these things.”

“They’re not even gonna let me through the door.”

“They will if your with me. Unless you really don’t want to go.” She says sleepily.

“No, I’ll go. I wanna go. A swanky party. A beautiful gal. What more could a guy want?”

He gives her arm a squeeze, but she doesn’t answer. In less than a minute her breathing becomes slow and deep, but he stays up for a lot longer afterwards, thinking.