Chapter Text
The third time Jean’s gaze glanced over the door to the aquatic center in as many weeks, Jeremy felt like he had to finally say something.
It was on their walk home one afternoon that he brought it up, faux casually, as if such a conversation could possibly pass for casual.
“Do you want to talk about it? The pool, I mean.”
“Not right now,” Jean replied. That answer was getting frustrating, because no matter how often he touted it out, Jeremy was always equally as unmoored as to how to answer.
He sighed. “We can’t help if we don’t know what to look out for.”
Jean didn’t stop walking. “I don’t want you to look out for anything.”
“Is that true or do you just not want us to know your weak points?” It was a theory he’d been holding on to for some time. Easily a preservation technique leftover from days when vulnerability was a death sentence.
“I am a weak point.” Jeremy couldn’t quite make out whether his tone was supposed to be joking or not. It wasn’t funny.
“Stop that.” They both knew he didn’t really mean it, so they kept walking in silence for another block or so before Jeremy asked, “Are you talking to Dr. Dobson at all?”
“Yes.”
“Has she given any recommendations?”
“No.”
“No?” Jeremy had his own experiences with therapy, and even though sometimes problems hit a dead end and issues failed to resolve neatly, it seemed early and even bordering on unprofessional for Dobson to declare the matter beyond hope or discussion. He kept his eyes on Jean’s, glad he knew the streets well enough to walk them without watching.
For the first time in ages, Jean broke first. “This specific subject may not have come up quite yet.”
“This can’t keep going Jean. I’m fighting for you with Coach but there are some unanswered questions there I can’t help with. Sooner or later someone is going to ask for results and I want you to be in a position to tell them something good.” He hated leaning on the pressure from the coaching staff but it was one of the few things that actually motivated Jean. God knows his own health and healing seemed to matter little to him overall.
“So you’ve decided to take me on.” Despite his bored tone, the words tasted bitter.
“I already have, this is just next steps.”
There was silence for another few blocks.
“I’ll take care of it, I swear. Just let me help.” Jeremy hoped he heard the unspoken sentence there. I’ll take care of you. Let me.
After a long silence, they finally reached the front door of the house. Hand on the handle, Jean made eye contact with Jeremy and gave him a brief, firm nod.
“Try, if you want.”
That was all the permission he needed.