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"I love you, Jackson," Elijah said. His voice was just barely louder than a whisper, but in the silent room, Jackson could hear every syllable ringing out.
"Don't say that," Jackson murmured. He didn't want to hear that, not now. Not after such a fantastic night.
"But I mean it."
"Elijah, stop," Jackson said. He clutched the hem of his T-shirt hard, his knuckles turning white. "We're best friends. That's all there is to us."
"You kissed me."
"It didn't mean anything. Just a spur of the moment thing... Please don't make this harder than it already is."
The shape of the mattress shifted slightly as Elijah rolled over to face him. Jackson could feel Elijah's gaze on his face, but he kept staring at the ceiling. There were 43 glow-in-the-dark star stickers. He'd counted them over and over and over again when he was younger, when the burning pain of his mom still felt like a freshly-ripped off band-aid. He'd spent sleepless nights counting the 43 stars repeatedly, wondering if the number would change the next time he did. As if it would matter if it did. But... If the numbers could change, that meant anything could change. Whatever happened to his mom could change. Now, as he counted star 17, he wondered if his feelings could change.
It was a terrible thing, to want. Jackson knew it dearly, though he didn't want to. Longing was like the familiar taste of poison on his tongue.
"I love you," Elijah repeated.
Jackson could feel his throat become scratchy as tears dangerously threatened to form. "Stop it. Please." His voice cracked and he stopped speaking.
"I loved you from the beginning. When I first saw you. Beating up that kid? For me? I fell in love, Jackson. My fate was written in the stars that moment. I'd have to stop world to stop the feeling," said Elijah.
"Elijah..." Jackson whispered.
"After that, I just kept falling in love with you over and over again. When we went to the coast. When we snuck out to a party. When I got my ears pierced. When we watched A Nightmare on Elm Street. Tonight. Again and again, Jackson. I can't help it. You're so... loveable."
"Please..."
"You're my best friend and I love you forever."
Jackson didn't respond and silence filled the room. A low rumble of thunder was followed by a flash of lightning, illuminating Elijah's face for a moment. Immediately, his expression burned into Jackson's memory, perhaps permanently.
In his features were a mingle of sadness and acceptance and... love. Unadulterated, innocent love. His heart twisted. Jackson hated, hated, how he could read Elijah so easily, how he could tell each word he was speaking was nothing but the honest truth. Deep down, Jackson wanted nothing more but to hold Elijah and never let him go, for nothing bad to ever happen to the either of them. There were a thousands word he wanted- needed to say, but instead-
"I'm going to sleep," Jackson said and rolled over to his side, turning away from Elijah. "Goodnight."
A moment of silence. Then - "Night."