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"Last chance to run, Kudou."
"Very funny, Hattori." Besides, he highly doubted he could have run at the moment even if he'd wanted to, what with his legs basically feeling like jelly. "I'm pretty sure I got myself into this mess."
"I suppose that much is true." Then why was Heiji still smirking like he found all this so very amusing? "I've got to say, it's enough to move even my shrivelled little heart. It seems like just last year I helped you with your elementary school homework."
"That was last year." He adjusted his collar for the umpteenth time. "And you only helped because you wanted us to leave on some harebrained trip right away so we had to get my summer homework in a day. I can only write so fast."
"And then you never even thanked me for my selfless efforts." Was the idiot not even listening? "But that's all in the past now. You're all grown up now~"
"I should hope." He sighed. "I bet you think I'm an idiot for doing this, don't you?"
"An idiot? Not at all." Heiji shrugged. "A bit rushed, sure, but then with how long you spent pining after Nee-san, I suppose you've thought all this through."
"More times than I can count." Oh, yes. He'd thought it all through, thought of all the ways it could all go wrong, all the potential catastrophes that could turn this from the best decision he'd ever made to the thing that brought him the most pain.
He always ended up thinking of Ran in the end, Ran and her smile, and knew he was doing the right thing.
"Exactly. So even if I do think it's pretty soon, well, you're both adults. It's not like getting married right out of high school is the most reckless thing you've ever done in your life."
"That's not the way Kogoro put it." He sighed. Eventually Kogoro had come around, especially after Ran put her foot down, but when they'd first let him know he had exploded. "According to him we're ruining our lives."
"Because obviously he's an expert in how to lead a happy married life."
"Well, at least he knows how to ruin one."
"And that's why you'd listen to him? I know you're not an idiot, Kudou, so try not to sound like one." Heiji rolled his eyes. "He's bitter and hurt by his own screw-ups, and doesn't want his dear daughter to go through the same. Just don't mess it up and he'll get over it sooner or later."
"I can only hope. It was bad enough when he kept badmouthing me for making Ran wait so long."
"Well, you've got to admit, he kind of had a point." And there was that annoying grin again. "Besides, it's not like you've got nothing else in your lives. Nee-san's going on to university, right? And it's not like you'll be without work, with all the cases that keep coming up."
"Right." And whatever else happened, as long as he was with Ran, he'd make it through.
"Besides, I wouldn't be so worried about Uncle if I were you." As Shinichi gave him a questioning gaze, Heiji snorted. "Apparently he oh so reluctantly volunteered to be Eri-san's escort for the wedding. And before you ask, no, Nee-san didn't trick them into it."
"Maybe there's some hope for them yet." Though more likely Kogoro was going to ruin it all over again by ogling some pretty guest in a low-cut dress. "What about Kazuha?"
Heiji blinked. "What about her? Far as I know, she's currently helping Nee-san into her dress. At least that's what she's supposed to be doing, looking at the time."
"When exactly are you going to get over that ridiculous denial of yours and admit that you like her?"
"Oh, I don't know. When exactly are you going to get over this obsession of yours and realise that not everyone lives happily ever after with their childhood friend?"
"I was being serious, Hattori."
"So was I." Heiji leaned against a wall, eyes drifting up to the ceiling. "You're so focused on Nee-san, it never even occurred to you that maybe, just maybe I do see Kazuha as a friend and a sister and not a potential partner?"
"Uh, because it's obvious she's smitten with you?"
"And because of that, I owe her to love her back?" Heiji looked back at him, giving him a lopsided smile. "Sad to say, Kudou, but that's not how it works. Sometimes no matter how much you love someone, how much time you spend thinking about them, how far you would go for their sake, they will never see you as more than a friend."
"You sound like you have personal experience with that." Why was he getting this uneasy feeling in his stomach?
"Oh, of course I do." Heiji pushed himself off the wall, glancing at the clock on the wall. "The funny thing is, Kazuha even figured it out once, that I was into someone else. Then she met that someone without even realising it and forgot all about it."
Okay, now he was definitely feeling sick, thinking back to the first time they had ever encountered Kazuha. How she had been so jealous of someone she only knew by name. "Hattori, I…"
"Oh, hush, Kudou." Heiji's fingertip only touched his lips very briefly, barely long enough for him to notice, but it was enough to silence him. "We should get going. Wouldn't want to make your bride wait too long for you, would we?"
"Right." He swallowed. "Sorry."
"For what?"
"For making you do this." Because he couldn't even imagine what it would have been like to be in Heiji's position right now.
"Don't be an idiot. If you'd tried to have someone else as your best man, I would have punched you." The grin was back, and far as he could tell, it was perfectly sincere. "Someone has to make sure you make it all the way to married life without getting mixed up in a murder in the middle of your wedding, and that's my job by all rights."
"Why do you seem so happy about this? I mean… how?"
"Why? Because I know she will make you happy." Heiji patted his shoulder. "You were already head over heels for Nee-san when I first met you, and I knew that perfectly well. I've had plenty of time to come to terms with it."
"Still. If I'd known…"
"I meant it when I said I'd have punched you if you tried to leave me out. Now stop whimpering and let's get going." The pat became a push, now. "Just think about it, by the time this mess of a day is over, Nee-san will be your wife."
"Right. Ran." Ran, who would soon be his wife.
Somehow, that thought did make him forget about everything else.