Chapter Text
I was in the seventh grade when I realized I was invisible. No, not in the literal see through sort of way, but it was close enough. I was average in pretty much every way and no one really noticed me. I tried my best to stand out but any attempt seemed fruitless, I thought, and eventually I gave up entirely.
With my anonymity it was pretty near impossible to find love, and I didn’t figure I had the best understanding of what love really was, anyway. My father left us many years ago and ever since, my mother had taken a downward spiral into the land of serial relationships.
She was hot as moms go, skinny yet curvy, well-dressed, skilled with a makeup brush. She was a kind person, too, if not a little naïve.
Make that a lot naïve. Because with each new guy came the inevitable end of the relationship, which, for me, meant yet another night of chick flicks and ice cream in an effort to try to comfort her.
When this whole thing began, I made a point to get to know the guys my mother would bring home. But after a while they all started blending together, exhibiting the same traits and eventually, leaving us just as my father had done. Instead of bothering with their names, I started referring to them as “Skip,” because collectively, that’s what they all did when it came down to it. They all skipped out.
When her relationships came crumbling down, as they always seemed to do, my mother would rent a U-Haul, pack up our things, and take me to a brand new city to “get a clean slate.”
Since the whole clean slate thing happened a few times a year now, I’ve been to a whole smattering of schools. I managed to graduate high school despite being part of a class of students whose names I didn’t even know, and now I was attending college.
But it wasn’t like I had the money to just stay at one college—no. I had to go wherever my mom took me, which meant transfers and referrals and lots of skeptical college staff and administration.
That’s why when I started out in Atlanta, Georgia, I’d taken up a job at a local restaurant to get some cash flow going. I reasoned that if I could just save up enough money, I could stay here and not have to relocate with my mother during her next inevitable breakup.
Right now I was living off campus and commuting each day in my nondescript white vehicle. I’d rather live on campus, but it wasn’t really an option with things the way they were right now.
Barden University was a great school, definitely high on my list of my favorite colleges attended if not my favorite of all. All I wanted was to stay here and complete my four years of college, but I was afraid that would never happen.
A benefit of all the moving around meant that I didn’t have to worry about tearful goodbyes exchanged with best friends, or attempts at ill-fated long distance relationships. I was, ultimately, alone. I hadn’t really had any friends or dated anyone since the days when my parents were together. It was easier that way.
But this story wasn’t about me.
It was about her. Beca Mitchell.
Let’s face it, she was the man. (Well, despite not actually being a man.) An excruciatingly talented DJ, her family was loaded…and she looked somewhere between a Suicide Girl and a Greek goddess.
Beca Mitchell was an out lesbian and a lady killer.
Her blonde bitchy counterpart was Aubrey Posen. It was no question who was taking the Barden Bellas to finals this year.
Beca and Aubrey were the dream team, and I thought they had a serious thing going on, but I’d underestimated the reputation of Beca. Sure, Aubrey was her girlfriend, but it turns out she wasn’t the only one.
I remember the first time I spoke to Beca Mitchell. It’s not like she blew me away or anything. I mean, I was totally in control. She came into the restaurant where I work to meet Aubrey for a date. She was alone when I came up to the table to get her drink order.
“Hi,” she smiled at me as I approached her.
“Yes. I mean…no,” I stammered, getting flustered by the way her blue eyes bore onto me, “I-I mean y…”
Thankfully she cut me off before I floundered any more.
“I’m not quite ready to order,” Beca admitted.
And then when I walked away I did the stupidest thing. I curtsied. I have never in my life done that. I don’t know what possessed me. I don’t think I’ll ever understand the power Beca has over women, and I’m not even into girls…right?
As I walked away with barely a shred of dignity, I saw Aubrey join her at the table. Aubrey Posen ran the Bellas, not to mention LGBT club, Barden Democrats, Student Council, Future Lawyers of America, Big Sisters, Adopt-A-Shut-In, and…I think that’s it.
“I’ve decided to write a children’s book,” I heard her say as I brought my order book back over to the table.
Oh. And she’s writing a children’s book.
The next time I saw Beca there, I was expecting it to be Aubrey meeting her. But it wasn’t. Apparently this was her other girlfriend, Cynthia Rose, member of the Barden dance team.
“And she told me she thought it would be better if we did the routine to Katy Perry!”
“Katy Perry?!”
“I KNOW. I mean, if we want to be taken seriously we need to do a routine to something a little more meaningful than I Kissed a Girl or that song about the plastic bag,” Cynthia Rose groaned.
When I came to get their order, Beca took charge.
“Two green salads, dressing on the side. Salmon for her, Lobster for me,” she grinned.
“I love when you do that,” Cynthia told her with an admiration filled smile.
“I love doing that.”
“I love that you love that I love you doing that,” god, seriously? I was losing brain cells just listening to their ridiculous banter.
“And…No need to rush between courses,” Beca said to me dismissively before turning back to her secondary girlfriend, “That top looks so hot on you. I bet it’s even hotter off of you.”
She winked. She actually winked. It didn’t even come across cheesy, either, she somehow managed to do it so that she seemed smooth and sexy and…Chloe, you’re getting off track here.
The point is I saw Beca Mitchell again a few days later toting a different girl this time. This one was brunette and leggy with her breasts practically bursting out of her shirt. It seemed like Beca didn’t have a type. Girl was her type.
“Never been here before, babe. So I hope they have vegetarian.”
But seriously, a third girlfriend? How much free time did this girl have? And how much of it did she spend with a girl’s head between her legs? It was beginning to get downright ludicrous.
With a new girl came a new play, and since this girl was a staunch vegan, she had to play that angle. Even though I’ve personally seen her eat a hamburger like her life depended on it.
Beca looked at the menu and acted massively offended by the dishes that included meat in them. She went on a whole spiel about how if she wanted to torture animals, she’d go to a medical lab, and this girl she was with, she fell for it hook, line and sinker.
I wasn’t trying to pass judgment or anything, but for whatever reason, being a vegan activist was usually code for “easy.” And let’s not forget the whole reputation that sorority girls had—and I knew for a fact that this busty babe was one of the recent pledges for Barden’s top sorority.
“You know, for you…I don’t have to give up all meat,” the girl flirted mercilessly, “not pussy, anyway.”
Vulgar. And proving my point exactly.
I didn’t get it. All of these girls seemed so confident and cool. How did they not know that Beca was cheating on all of them?
I posed this question to my coworker, Fat Amy. She took one look at Beca and then told me how the legendary Barden lady killer managed to pull this many girlfriends without getting caught.
“She’s a total operator. She goes out with girls from different cliques, so that they never actually talk to each other,” Amy explained with remarkable clarity, “And then she tells them that her father doesn’t know she’s gay, so they’ll have to keep it a secret.”
I gasped. It was definitely a smart plan. What a cad.
“How’d you learn all this stuff?” I asked her absently, not expecting her response.
“I don’t know. Just a guess!” she ran off tearfully.
Well. I had my answer. Fat Amy was another casualty of love. I didn’t even peg her for the type to date girls. Then again, Beca seemed to be able to turn anyone…
Beca was confident in her system for juggling girls, but even she couldn’t anticipate the events of audition day.
Aubrey was there, of course, as she was the de facto Bellas leader. Apparently Cynthia Rose had it out with her co-captain of the dance team and opted to try out for the Bellas instead. And Stacie, in an effort to show Beca there was more to her than “this amazing rack and my flawless ass” decided to try out as well.
And then there was me. I thought maybe it was a good idea to branch out a little. No one was ever going to know who I was if I didn’t participate in anything. The day of auditions I decided to dye my blonde hair red, in an attempt to stand out a little more.
Now I’m starting to think this whole standing out thing is vastly overrated.