Archive of Our Own

“Fuck!” Shen Yuan hissed, without even bothering to open his eyes.

He didn’t have to open them. The cold stone beneath him was very familiar by now.

“Hmm. Does Master Shen think that would help?”

Tianlang-Jun had given up on the dramatic coffin entrance three repeats ago, when Shen Yuan had, in a fit of very deserved frustration, successfully buried the coffin and most of the room in rubble.

It hadn’t helped very much, since Zhuzhi-lang was quite able to use his giant snake self to push rock out of the way, and Tianlang-Jun, though fragile, was capable of incredible strength. It had only gained him a few minutes of peace and quiet, realistically, but it had felt satisfying. Unfortunately, it now meant that he was fairly regularly waking up in the care of two heavenly demons.

‘Fairly’ regularly meaning: every twenty four hours, without fail. It hadn’t mattered, so far, if he and Binghe escaped the mausoleum, if they died, if the four of them begrudgingly sat down and had a meal together, or if Xin Mo was used to remove all four of them from the demon realm. This did not appear to be some garbage ‘learn to cooperate’ plot (usually designed by Airplane to show that room temperature IQ villains would inevitably betray the protagonist at the last, most dramatic moment.) Luo Binghe had not been enthusiastic about testing get-along options out, but Tianlang-Jun had been very enthusiastic about it - he was very, very fond of human literature, apparently.

Too fond, if the lilt in his voice meant anything. “Immortal Master Shen, what an intriguing idea!”

“Absolutely not.”

Tianlang-Jun tsked. “Don’t discredit what dual cultivation with a Heavenly Demon can do, Master Shen! Perhaps Zhuzhi, if I’m too old for you?”

Thankfully, that was when Binghe crashed into the room. He’d arrived later in the day than the others, and the reset seemed to position them both roughly where and when they’d woken (or, In Binghe’s case, entered)
But by now he knew where he was aiming, which was nice. It saved some really atrocious conversations with the demon emperor and general Shen Yuan was starting to think of as ‘the family’

Binghe’s family, obviously, not his. But - minus some of the bloodshed and murder attempts, Tianlang-Jun seemed set on treating him as some sort of in-law. It was sobering to think that the deranged demon emperor was the demon who had so far injured him the least.

It had done wonders for their relationship, honestly, to be stuck like this. Shen Yuan had eventually given up the immortal poser act, on the basis that if they never got unstuck, it wouldn’t matter, and if they did get unstuck, it was inevitable that it would only happen after he’d relaxed his guard and revealed himself, thinking that time would reset itself anyway and no one would ever know. Unwitting honesty was a trope, right?

Trying to trick the narrative had not worked, but being able to swear wholeheartedly and loudly had been a certain kind of relief. The fact that none of the predictable tropes had worked had prompted.. Quite a lot of swearing, honestly. Binghe had learned a few new words! One of those words had been ‘Airplane’

If they ever got out of here, Shang Qinghua was probably going to be asked a lot of questions by an entire family of Heavenly Demons. Wouldn’t that be a bonding experience for them? It would certainly be cathartic for Shen Yuan!

~*~

It had begun when he’d woken up in much better shape than he’d fallen asleep, which had come as a surprise. His qi flowed normally, there was no trace of the Ties that Bind, the blood was cleaned from his robes, he’d almost been comfortable. That had been a relief, until his brain had caught up with his eyes, and until a very apologetic Zhuzhi-lang had slid into the room.

“Immortal Master Shen, it seems one of the intruders had triggered some of the wards. Begging Master Shen to stay close and take care.”

There was no avoiding Tianlang-Jun if he went along with this, but there were fewer last breath candles on the paths Zhuzhi-lang knew, and the blind corpses avoided them. He’d wasted no qi trying to stay safe!

Which meant he was much more energetic and much more proactive about vaulting up to join Luo Binghe on the Black Moon Rhinoceros Python’s back and flinging Xiu Ya towards the great mural behind them immediately, without helping Tianlang-Jun rise from the coffin at all.

Tianlang-Jun had responded with a laugh, a scolding ‘Now, now, Master Shen,” and a blood eagle that knocked Xiu Ya aside handily. “Haven’t you already demonstrated how well you know the Holy Mausoleum? The same handful of tricks won’t work this time.”

“It’s fine, Shizun.” Binghe had smiled. “As long as you’re choosing me, these two don’t matter at all.”

“They’ve both fed me their blood already, Binghe.” He hissed. “We must-“

“There is no ‘must’, now, Immortal Master Shen” Zhuzhi-lang sounded apologetic. “Even if you retrace your steps to the east and escape again, it will be the same.”

Tianlang-Jun smiled peacefully. “Exactly so. That stray young woman must have penetrated quite deep into the old tombs, ah, it’s really a little impressive…”

“We’re… all… stuck in a loop?” Shen Qingqiu had demanded. Proud Immortal Demon Way hadn’t mentioned any such traps, not in all the endless bloated word count! Two hundred thousand words of the three Great Halls alone and nothing about a trap that could reset time?! Great Master Airplane, show some mercy, in a word count that bloated, how we’re important plot points still somehow cut? How long would the arc have been if it had been completed?!

“Ah, well.” Tianlang-Jun had smiled. “Unfortunately, as far as ‘stuck’, that really is just Master Shen. My bloodline is naturally quite entitled to be here, leaving the loop is actually quite a simple matter. It’s only that Master Shen and those strays are not demons of any great rank…”

“Master Shen need not worry.” Zhuzhi-lang murmured. “We will remain and help to break the curse. It would be very difficult and painful to attempt it alone.”

“I couldn’t possibly trouble my hosts farther.” Shen Qingqiu responded dryly.

“It’s no trouble, Master Shen.” Tianlang-Jun beamed. “I did bring a book.”

~*~
Tianlang-Jun had brought several books, as it turned out. All of them were awful! Shen Qingqiu learned this, mostly to his own personal, abject horror over the next three loops, as he tried to plot a safe path into the deeper vaults. Reaching the source of the curse and dealing with it in such a short period was going to be a tight squeeze no matter what, but some rooms were more time consuming than others. There had to be a way! A nice short way, so that he could minimize the reading sessions that always ended, somehow, with Tianlang-Jun reading aloud and asking for commentary. As a long time reader of Proud Immortal Demon Way noted for his… constructive criticism, this did feel like his own personal hell, actually! Great Master Airplane, did your terrible writing infect this world’s literary conventions? Did you infect the bloodline of Heavenly Demons with your terrible taste?

The System was quick to give points out for [developing the interests and hobbies of the missing characters!] Unfortunately, however, there was only so much of this kind of point farming Shen Qingqiu could tolerate! Hearing about his own chrysanthemum’s petals being spread wide was entirely too much! He didn’t even have a fan to hide behind, and, worse yet, Luo Binghe was not opposed to the subject matter at all!

At least Binghe could be chastised with a look and a cold ‘be silent’ lifted straight out of the original goods’s playbook. Tianlang-Jun was more difficult.

“He looks very like Xiyan when he does that.” The demon emperor had mused, ostensibly to Zhuzhi-lang. “Do you think a preference for cold beauties is some inherited trait?”

“I think.” Shen Qingqiu had gritted “that if the venerable emperor is unwilling to be helpful, then he could at least refrain from base speculation along these lines.”

He was touchy because- as it turned out - some of the rooms in the Mausoleum did not stay put. Demons with shadow stepping abilities like Mobei-Jun were rare, but had happened throughout history. Powers like Xin Mo were unheard of only in their degree, not their function- and many ancient kings of demon lines long past had incorporated those powers into their defenses.

The point of such chambers wasn’t always to be hard to find. The point seemed to be to force intruders into running an unpredictable gauntlet that couldn’t be easily navigated. Naturally, Binghe could handle the guardian beasts in his path easily, and in Proud Immortal Demon Way the shifting maze hadn’t played a large role, because Binghe had never really needed to backtrack or create a map.

But the last fight had taken almost an hour, the creeping feeling of being “low battery” was catching up to him, and he’d just been regaled with a particularly torrid recounting of the endless battle between Liu Qingge and Binghe, starring his corpse and a bound War God as a captive audience. Even Binghe had been appalled.

“Surely my son and Master Shen can handle this much?” Tianlang-Jun had raised an eyebrow, and gone back to his book.

“Are you that useless? If you’re so bored, you can leave.” Binghe had snapped. “Shizun, I never laid a hand on that -that Liu-shufu.”

“Oh? Then how did his ribs come to be broken?” Shen Qingqiu had asked. “Only I seem to recall that both he and Yue-Shixiong were both somewhat poorly last I saw, and rumors of a daily battle for five years. How is this not touching?”

“This and that are different!” Binghe whined. His injuries were already fading, but Shen Qingqiu knew from that first day that Binghe’s reserves were pretty low. Not immediately fighting Tianlang-Jun and using a more solid cover against the corpse rain helped immensely, but the Mausoleum was vast and unpredictable. Even without the threat of the Blind Corpses, it was clear that Zhuzhi-lang would only intervene if Shen Qingqiu’s life was in danger, and Tianlang-Jun would only do so on his own whims.

“As far as leaving, isn’t there some misunderstanding?” Tianlang-Jun chuckled. “Leaving or staying doesn’t concern me very much. After all, I promised that Master Shen would be safe, so long as Zhuzhi guaranteed he caused no trouble. Here, he can’t cause trouble at all, and is well away from the Sects. Nor can the Sects trouble me here, and all the things I need most have obligingly delivered themselves to this place as well. For the moment, I’m quite content.”

Binghe had gotten a thoughtful look at that, which Shen Qingqiu hadn’t liked at all. So he’d hurried ahead, crying in his heart. In this dysfunctional family, violence was never a distant option, but it was still preferable in many ways to them bonding.
Binghe followed him, immediately contrite, so that was fine, but..,

Eventually they got lucky, and hit a block of rooms that Shen Qingqiu remembered well that didn’t shift at all, and required cleverness instead of raw spiritual power to pass.

Or, at least, they required a bizarre mix of being good at video game style hidden object puzzles and having read several classical texts and poems. Apparently Airplane had thought that ancient demon lords, who celebrated violence and aggression, were scholars of Li Bai, despite the time period and sentiments being wildly mismatched! He could almost hear Airplane-bro whining that this was why it was a good security measure, as so few demons would find such texts readable, whereas Binghe had a classical education and would know the answers!

Shen Yuan knew the answers because he had played a Resident Evil game at least once in his life, thank you, and pushed through to the depths in a timeframe that any speedrunner would brag about. The next room demanded that each occupant shed their blood, and would crush anyone not of a noble demon line instantly, but that was even less trouble! The moment the doors vanished and Shen Qingqiu saw the murals representing the huadians of the old great clans, he simply told Binghe to coax his blood parasites to his fingers and cut at a fingertip, proving his blood ‘worthy’

It got him to the inner chambers alive and well, but he had three Heavenly demons staring at him about it.

“The same…. book, Shizun?” Binghe frowned.

“Naturally, the properties of your blood are very familiar to me by now.” He drawled. It wasn’t a bad deflection, since Binghe fairly reliably sulked or deflected any mention of just how Shen Qingqiu’s body was stuffed unbearably full of Heavenly Demon blood.
But the Protagonist was the most clever and intelligent person in this world, and his father had a gift for pursuing the most difficult conversations with glee….

“Blood aside, Master Shen knew exactly how the vault operated…? Can the major Sects really have had such knowledge and refrained from ever acting on it? Does the old man stumbling around know these things as well?” Tianlang-Jun asked.

“Huan Hua would have no way of knowing such a thing, naturally, but a select few Peak Lords have inherited some secrets… is this master not Cang Qiong’s strategist?”

“Shang Qinghua.” Binghe breathed. “He and Mobei-Jun- I hadn’t noticed. Sha Hualing was so quick to suggest this place, it didn’t occur to me that Mobei only rarely offers ideas his pet rat didn’t suggest first…”

Shen Qingqiu sighed. “Shang-shidi and I became well acquainted after his failures at the Immortal Alliance Conference, and we came up with many fail-safes in case of… difficulties. Neither of us were so bold as to suggest this place, but we were both aware of it.”

“Perhaps I’ll pay Immortal Master Shang a visit.” Tianlang-Jun mused, and Shen Qingqiu barked a laugh. “Please do, that would be incredibly funny.”

Sue him! He wanted Airplane to deal with his own final boss for once!

They found the chamber, lined with quartz and mechanisms that gently spun and rocked back and forth, rather like being inside a fancy pocket watch. It was a full century too early for something like this, and it had presumably been built ages ago, which was part of why Shen Qingqiu didn’t feel at all bad about suggesting Tianlang-Jun go harass his shiftiest shidi.

“Shizun, if we disable the mechanism from here, I’m concerned that there will be backlash that could harm you.” Binghe frowned.
“Quite so.” Zhuzhi-lang agreed. “This was designed to keep intruders dangerous enough to penetrate this far until they could be retrieved, or else kill them. Unless Master Shen knows a way around this- it won’t be fooled with a few drops of blood.”

“I don’t know.” He said, grimly. This trap hadn’t ever been mentioned in Proud Immortal Demon Way, probably because Binghe was naturally immune to it. There had been very few wives in this arc, it had catered more to those fans who craved action. Shen Qingqiu vaguely recalled a few priestesses and sacrificial maidens to be papapad and promised a rescue, but none who traveled with him or were ‘intruders.’ So there was no one who could have been affected by this plot. “If… if Miss Haitang triggered it, if she were to…” his stomach twisted at the thought. He’d last seen her crying in anguish and fleeing, leaving the body of the Old Palace Master to rot. Hunting her down seemed.. a little too inhumane.

“Oh, I shouldn’t think so.” Tianlang-Jun shrugged. “The curse covers the entire Mausoleum, so naturally it’s tied to every intruder.”

“Shizun, I can use Xin Mo to reach Mobei-Jun.” Binghe offered. “He might be able to reach whichever clan built this place?”

“Even if he did, unless he could return with the correct key inside a day, it would do us no good.” Shen Qingqiu sighed. “Still, better than nothing..”

“I’ll try it as soon as we reset.” Binghe promised.

As promised, in the morning, Binghe was very late to his usual rendezvous, having presumably spawned into the Mausoleum and then left for the North immediately.

This left Shen Qingqiu in the uncomfortable position of being Tianlang-Jun’s chew toy. The man had so many pointed questions that the System had started blaring alarms.

“He and Zhuzhi-lang were never even in the novel, everything they do is already outside the bounds of the plot.” Shen Qingqiu grumbled at it.

Nevertheless, the System’s laws were as absolute as they were asinine, and while Tianlang-Jun presented himself as a whimsical, cultured young master whose next thought was wine and a good ballad, he was still the father of the almighty protagonist. He was clever, insightful, and his smile was made of sharp edges.

Caught between a System and a Heavenly Demon, Shen Qingqiu decided that this was bullshit! He didn’t deserve to be here! He was nowhere close to being the most deserving target of Tianlang-Jun’s focus! He’d been unwilling to care about Binghe and the truth about Su Xiyan, but… well…

Luckily (?) dying horribly to a trap Shen Qingqiu had lured him into had not lessened the Old Palace Master’s hatred in the slightest. Finding him was a challenge- Qiu Haitang clearly remembered what she’d heard, and abandoned the human stick in his little cart in loop after loop. But once he was found, it was harder to get him to stop rambling about Su Xiyan than it was to get him to start.

Actually, Tianlang-Jun found lots of ways to get him to stop. Nearly as many as there were chambers in the Mausoleum. Shen Qingqiu wasn’t sure that the echoing screams were a good addition to the ambiance, but it was marginally better than being forced into admissions that would get him killed. Right now he was leaning heavily on the vague idea that Shang Qinghua had learned a few things from Mobei-Jun, but he didn’t think it would hold up. Airplane had told him years ago that Mobei had been positively chatty at the Immortal Alliance Conference. No one would really buy that he’d trust his human spy with such information, or that he’d ever speak long enough to detail any real secrets. Airplane couldn’t be trusted to sell the ruse, either, since that would mean he had stolen information and passed it back to the Sects. The second anyone suggested that Shang Qinghua had ever been anything but totally loyal to his King and predestined executioner, he’d start wailing and grasping at thighs and kissing at asses and licking at boots like there was no tomorrow! He’d wriggle his way out of it and leave Shen Qingqiu to take the point loss! His bro, his fellow from the same hometown, his fellow scum, would throw him under the bus in an instant!

So, the screaming was - well… The Old Palace Master turned out to really deserve it! He’d gotten away with everything he’d done in Proud Immortal Demon Way while the fans had screamed for the castration of Shen Jiu, who was a surprisingly tragic character! If you thought about it, it was really entirely justified, even when Tianlang-Jun cheerfully tossed him into a room that -
-Well, the burbling sounds were worse than the screams, but they were also much quieter.

“Immortal Master Shen mustn’t think I’ve forgotten all his intriguing little secrets.” Tianlang-Jun smiled. “But this humble demon must admit that you’ve offered the perfect distraction. Could it be that Master Shen’s knowledge is not limited to just the Mausoleum?”

“Unfortunately, while this Master does know a great many things, in keeping with his position as the Peak Lord of QIng Jing, he had not yet completed his learning when The Old Palace Master put forth his accusations all those years ago, and knows almost nothing of the venerable Tianlang-Jun besides the propaganda he spread at that time. Meeting your esteemed self has been nothing but a surprise.”

“A pleasant one?” Tianlang-Jun’s smile was light and airy.

“In some ways, very much so.” He admitted. Knowing that Airplane had put real thought into this world and these characters - it was mostly infuriating, yes, but it was also… it was like seeing through the rot and faded gilt into the core of something that had once been elegant. It was realizing that the ruin hadn’t completely taken the skill away, that those tiny glimpses of a plot had resolutions, somewhere, if he could just shake Master Airplane hard enough to get them to fall out. It was realizing that Airplane had, at one point, cared about this shitty world. It was a lot like Tianlang-Jun himself - the original story had been carefully nurtured and filled with expectations and wishes, only to be crammed under a mountain of crap and celebrated by ignorant people who would never know what crimes they’d committed. If he ever got a comment section back, he’d leave some words for the horny jackasses who had decided they wanted a thousand flowers instead of this poignant, tragic, heartfelt story! “In others… I could certainly wish that the past was different, before we met. It’s hard for me to think that Zhangmen-shixiong would have chosen this path, if-”

“I’m quite capable of demanding my own apologies from little Yue Qi.” Tianlang-Jun smiled, even as the groans of the Old Palace Master faded to a harsh, staccato beat of pained gasps. “Why, does Master Shen think I would get them? From the Sect that threw my son into the Endless Abyss in the same moment that he was revealed?”

“I did that, not my Sect. As for my martial brother, it’s not wrong to say that he’d repay this debt any way he could short of harming his family. He takes his debts and his failures seriously.”

Tianlang-Jun hummed. “I had imagined destroying the great Sects to be a bit of an effort, but it seems Huan Hua has already crumbled and that Cang Qiong would do so for the asking. Master Shen certainly knows how to take the satisfaction out of a well-deserved vengeance, if he is correct.”

Shen Qingqiu shrugged. “I can only speak from my own experience, but it’s easy to be afraid and act in the moment. It’s even easier to regret such actions, once one’s sight is clearer. I couldn’t hide or nurture Binghe’s potential, and he would have been the enemy of the cultivation world in an instant if he’d been seen. But it seems quite a lot of trouble could be avoided after all, if I had only…”

Tianlang-Jun shrugged. “Perhaps, once I finish setting a few housekeeping affairs in order, I’ll see if anyone feels as Master Shen does.”

Somehow, he was certain that after the demon emperor set his affairs in order, no one would feel that way anymore! Hadn’t he wanted to merge the realms? Hadn’t they already had that entire argument? But he supposed that nothing would really… change the fact that Tianlang-Jun wanted to have his revenge. His body was rotting away, he’d been subjected to hunger and thirst and pain, his wife was gone, his son was suffering in the same world that had been cruel to him… wasn’t it a little too tragic?

Not that merging the realms wouldn’t result in tragedy as well, but… fuck. Maybe just letting him stay in here wasn’t too bad an ending.

-Not! There was no way he was going to stay in this dangerous hell pit and let things stay as they were! Not when Binghe and Tianlang-Jun could leave whenever they got bored!

~*~
Binghe didn’t return until the next time he woke up on the cold stone slab, a bed that was getting less and less restful each time he found himself there. He couldn’t even prop a bunch of pillows onto the slab - they existed in this area as funerary goods, sure, but the whole… time aspect of the loop meant that unless he wanted to spend a day napping, he’d never actually wake up in comfort.

“This useless disciple is sorry, Shizun.” Binghe’s wide eyes glimmered with unshed tears even as he knelt for a reprimand. “The Mobei clan has few records of the south. We did find some references to a clan that worshiped ‘the divided sun’ and taught that there were ‘many secret histories’, but nothing tangible.”

“The Hooded Princes. This master knew of them.” He forced himself to say through gritted teeth. Dammit, Airplane. “They are long lost. So, no key?”

“If they were ever real, there’s nothing left now.”

Shen Qingqiu sighed. “There’s nothing to be ashamed of. What can’t be done can’t be done, and what can’t be avoided can’t be avoided. There must be some way- surely the great Princes didn’t build their tombs themselves! No master builder would build a trap they couldn’t disarm and escape when their masters inevitably decided to silence them! It’s only a matter of finding the correct solution.”

He had faith that there was a solution- that Airplane wouldn’t have ended an arc with a puzzle the protagonist couldn’t solve. Even if there was no reason for Binghe to fear this trap, his wives wouldn’t be allowed to remain trapped! If it was truly inescapable it would have been used on some villain to endlessly make them suffer, like Tianlang-Jun was doing to the Old Palace Master even now.

It would have been a fitting fate for Shen Qingqiu, something he was resolutely not thinking about.

“Shizun” Binghe whispered. “If there’s no way out, isn’t that… it’s fine like this, isn’t it? The company isn’t good, but they’ll leave eventually, and this disciple will never leave Shizun’s side. We could stay in this moment, it’s completely fine…”

“This master hardly enjoys waking up on a stone slab every day, relying on inedia, one wrong step away from unbearable agony, in a stuffy maze where there is never any sunlight or fresh air.” He wished he had a fan to rap Binghe over the head with. Fully grown demon lord or not, the instincts of raising his favorite stubborn little sheep were surprisingly hard to shake!

The next loop Binghe brought his favorite snacks and tea, and cleared out an exceptionally luxurious tomb of not one but three terrifying guardians so that he could take a nap in complete comfort. Not the point! Not the point at all! Nor was the excursion outside to watch the stunning sky of the demon realm! Binghe! Not! The! Point!

He lost six loops to Binghe’s utmost attempts to spoil him. He’d always been a creature of habit, and there were worse things than waking up to Zhuzhi-Langs soft greetings, helping Tianlang-Jun emerge from his coffin, chatting about novels until Binghe arrived, and then being wined and dined while Tianlang-Jun wandered off to ensure that justice and vengeance were served in equal measure. If you ignored the swarming blind corpses and stayed clear of basically every gaping doorway, it was really very domestic!

But he had no interest in waking up on that horrible slab forever while the fate of the world hung, trapped in amber, unable to end.

So he tried.

Binghe, there’s a cursed amulet that can transform even an immortal into a demon-

And he tried.

Xixhi-lang, the mechanisms in the walls might be disrupted if your snakes could crawl into these cracks-

And he tried.

Shouldn’t Tianlang-Jun consider further options? Has he not read many such texts?

And he tried.

Miss Haitang, this Shen is a very different person than the boy you remember, please let go of your grief and hate and consider us as strangers-

And he tried-

[+10 B points for increasing the complexity of side characters! Family dynamic parameters increased from HOSTILE to DYSFUNCTIONAL! Please continue to work hard!]

And he kept trying-

Is Tianlang-Jun content with just this? With having only one person answer for the crimes of many?

Can Zhuzhi-lang not see that this is no answer to our conflict? Postponing a choice is not making a choice in any way that matters?

If Binghe really wishes for this Master to choose him, there must be some choice to make, must there not?

And trying-

Why should I worry? I’ll leave when I wish. Like this, the rot and pain don’t progress.

Master Shen makes it sound so simple. Right now, my benefactor and my lord are getting along quite well, I can’t call this ‘being unhappy’

Shizun, this disciple already knows he won’t be chosen and things definitely won’t be as they were. Even when the others come to no harm and there’s no choice Shizun can make, it’s like this, over and over.

And failing-

Shizun, Xin Mo is- it’s better just to stay like this, here. Please. Please choose me, just for today. Otherwise, I can’t-

He could choose not to look for a way out. Binghe saw that as choosing him, and was soothed and softened every loop he allowed it to happen. But the start of every loop saw him fragile again, saw him staring out of those dark and wild eyes. Memory persisted, but the physical and mental toll of Binghe’s carved up dreamscape and predatory sword and depleted qi did as well. New wounds were undone by each reset, but the old ones never healed either. So, over and over again, he chose to keep trying.

Was it so wrong to want to see a genuine smile from his little sheep? To see him start a day rested and well? To break out of a spiral where a perceived yes healed nothing but a perceived no made him darker and more distant over and over?

But dying his way out of the loop wouldn’t work- the Old Palace Master was proof of that. As for resolving other issues…

Hahaha! Naturally there was nothing at all that Shen Qingqiu was avoiding out in the world! Now that he knew Binghe was gay for him and not going to kill him, everything was fine! There was nothing else to worry about except the object between the thighs he was clinging too!

So it was absolutely nonsense that the loop had him trapped, when it was everyone else running away from their situation! Bad writing! Castrate the author!

…Even if being returned to this body was a little bit hard, it was fine! So what if the Sun and Dew body had been healthy and capable and very like his old one and had been ripped away? So what if it was the healthiest Shen Yuan had ever been? So what if he’d been so deep in his charade as Shen Qingqiu that it hadn’t even occurred to him that he could have his name back with his old face? So what if he’d wanted to look Yue-bro in the eyes without feeling the weight of needing to be someone else? So what if he’d wanted to see Binghe without dragging the face that had cast him into hell into it? So what if he’d thought - if he’d hoped- if he’d wanted-

So what if, once he left this place, he was going to have to pick that role up again? He knew it perfectly, there was practically no difference between Shen Yuan and Shen Qingqiu anymore anyway-

“Shizun?” Binghe asked, in the soft tone that meant he was really trying to act like a good little sheep. He’d brought a tea set today, and had set them up a little safe haven in some treasure room. There had been a really cool guardian beast of some sort, but… ah, well, it would be back on the next loop anyway…

“Binghe’s story deserves a better ending than this. A happy one. But… just for today… this Master is a little tired.” He mumbled, trying to settle politely into the pillows instead of sprawling. He wanted to sprawl. To be comfortable. To not be entirely wrapped up in this ‘bound role’ for just a little bit.

He wasn’t the same as Shen fucking Qingqiu. He hadn’t had a shitty author confuse whump with character development, ok? Shen Jiu was his own person, and Shen Yuan was his own person, and they weren’t the same.

Normally, when he gave in like this, Binghe lit up with such a happy smile that it was easy to go along with him, until the loop reset and the smile was replaced with more uncertainty and pain. But this time, Binghe didn’t smile.

“Shizun really isn’t… easy to understand.” Binghe murmured.

He sighed and turned away. It wasn’t a fan, but it hid his face. “Binghe, since it’s like this, can we… drop some of the formality?” He asked. “Could you… maybe… this master knows he has no room to make requests -“

“Shizun should ask.” Binghe sounded oddly breathless for a man who was, frankly, doing very little but pouring them a cup of tea. “This disciple will happily-“

“Will Binghe call this one Shen Yuan, when it’s just us?”

For a moment he thought he’d gotten away with it. The System was silent, and it wasn’t like he’d ever used anything but Qingqiu, Proud Immortal Demon Way had never used anything but Qingqiu, the original goods had only ever used Qingqiu…

Then he saw the way Binghe’s hands stilled. Nope! He hadn’t gotten away with shit! Binghe had done too much of his paperwork on Qing Jing for that to fly!

“Shizun’s name is…” Binghe started, those dark eyes burning red with intensity. “Shizun isn’t an imposter. His dreams are exactly as they have always been.” His eyes narrowed. “But then, this disciple had no way of knowing what Shizun’s dreams were like before encountering Meng Mo. Shizun was in seclusion before that, and before seclusion…”

“Binghe has always been clever.” Shen Yuan couldn’t hide the smile behind his sleeves without being very, very obvious about it, so he did his best to frown instead. He didn’t think it was working very well.

“The qi deviation.” Binghe murmured. “Was that Shen Jiu, or Shen Yuan?”

“I hope Binghe is at least observant enough to know the answer to his questions.”

“Is it only Shen Yuan, ever since then?” Binghe demanded. He was leaning closer now, the tea forgotten and oversteeped between them, filling the air with bitter, herbal scent.

An out! He could lie, say Shen Jiu had been the one to throw Binghe down! It wouldn’t even really be a lie, that was what Shen Jiu had done, it was his narrative role, the thing so important that his death had left a gaping hole in the plot for Shen Yuan to fill! He could say it!

He… couldn’t say it. Meng Mo had been right. Learning about Shen Jiu’s past had really been a bad plan. The og was scum! A villain! His role was to be hated, to take the blame, to be crucified! He wasn’t ever going to know if Shen Yuan used him for that role!

But Qiu Janluo had smiled and promised the world, then turned around to heap pain on him. Yue Qingyuan had abandoned him and never once explained why. The Sect had raised him up, only to scorn him and spread malicious rumors. Shen Yuan didn’t want to pity the man and then turn around and blame him for something that he hadn’t done, even if he probably would have still done it!

“It was me.” He croaked. “Ever since that day, it’s only ever been me.”

“It’s been Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan who knew how a soul could jump from body to body, how to make a body. Shen Yuan who knows the Holy Mausoleum like he’s walked it all his life. Shen Yuan who knew about Meng Mo, about dreams, about the blood of a heavenly demon.” Binghe sounded thoughtful. “….Shen Yuan who thought I would chase girls, who was so very afraid of what he thought I would become, who said what can’t be helped can’t be helped, who did what he did and then mourned-“

“Binghe should keep these guesses to himself. This master's hold on any body is tenuous, and must be carefully maintained. I just wanted to hear my old name again for a little bit.” He grumbled. Any more guesses like that and he’d be back in a much worse place than just stuck as Shen Qingqiu!

“As many times as Shizun wants. Shen Yuan. Yuan. Yuan-ge?” Binghe sounded hopeful and eager.

“Binghe!” He snapped. “Really! From ‘Shizun’ to ‘Yuan-ge’ so fast? What lack of propriety is this, ah?”

“Shizun said he didn’t want to be so formal?”

“The next time Binghe enters this place he had best do so with a fan for this master.” Shen Yuan grumbled.

“Shizun says so, but this Binghe thinks his face is too beautiful to cover.” Binghe’s voice was smooth and… a little deep? A little… if he had to describe it…

Nope! Not going there! Wrong! Bad! Scary! Too scary! Besides, neither Shen Qingqiu nor Shen Yuan would be that - only Bingge was-!

Articulating that thought was a mistake.

“Bing-ge?” Binghe’s expression was pleasant and smooth, but Shen Yuan knew that the mental math going on behind those suddenly dark eyes was verging on calculus territory. “Was Shizun so very young when he-“

Were those fucking tears in his eyes? Why? Why? Who had been the one to actually die several times? Why was Shen Yuan not the one crying? “This master was mistaken. What are these tears? Apparently it should be Bingmei after all.”

“Mn, that’s fine, this disciple can be his A-Yuan’s Bingmei!” Binghe insisted. The tears hadn’t entirely cleared up, but his smile had returned very quickly at the apparent indulgence of being scolded. A-Yuan wasn’t really better than Yuan-ge, and it seemed like ‘Shizun’ wasn’t going anywhere either way. But he didn’t complain- the mood felt kind of good right now. Binghe’s smile reminded him of happier times, and permitting this little secret between them seemed to have… maybe… changed the atmosphere a little?

~*~
At first, it seemed like things really had changed. For several loops, Binghe’s smile persisted, and he happily joined in every single escape attempt Shen Yuan could conceive of. All the while, no matter what wards he opened, what beasts he slayed, no matter what secret realms Shen Yuan asked him to search or plants or treasures he retrieved, he simply agreed happily. ‘Yes, Shizun’ and ‘Yes, A-Yuan’ were a constant refrain, and there seemed to be no challenge he wouldn’t overcome.

All the while, he managed to coax more and more out of Shen Yuan. The System’s mechanical tones sounded almost begrudging as it doled out satisfaction points beyond counting and b points in abundance. At this rate, Binghe would cover all the main arcs in Proud Immortal Demon Way! Minus the wives and revenge arc, of course, so it was still very much shorter, but wasn’t it plot holes getting filled and points being earned all the same? In the original Binghe had never really needed treasure and miracle pills beyond counting, he’d gathered them up for self satisfaction. Now he had a purpose, even if rescuing Shen Qingqiu was the weirdest of all wife plots. Airplane would roll over in his grave to see it!

Except that unless Airplane died in the same day that Shen Qingqiu had been resurrected, he wasn’t dead at all, and wasn’t going to see it, since it was all happening in a single day. Still, Binghe was happy, the System was happy, and at this point Shen Yuan was pretty sure that he was off the metaphoric and literal hook as far as human sticks went, so that was fine! Everything was fine, now, right? Except that if Binghe was gathering up all these wife plots and Binghe was gay now, and somehow Shen Yuan was stuck as the gay wife-

Nope! He was straight! So that was impossible. Besides, it wouldn't be a very good stallion novel if it devoted this many arcs to winning over a single wife of any gender! So it couldn’t be that- if it was by now he’d be losing points instead of gaining them!

So he let Binghe ask harmless questions that the System couldn’t fault. Vague things about his life ‘before he started teaching’

How he’d been indolent and wealthy-
(“Wealthy enough to read a new book every single day for years?!” Binghe had gasped.)

But frail and often alone-
(“Shizun certainly has no difficulty making friends now.” Binghe had grumbled)

About his siblings, who he missed and never really been able to mourn -
(“This disciple can set up a memorial tablet? Or… Shang-shishu and Qi-shishu?”
“Oh, but not Liu-shidi or Zhangmen-shixiong?”
“This disciple would be happy for them to be Shizun’s siblings.”)

About how hard it had been to see his new reality past the fiction he’d been obsessed with.
“Perhaps I should have tried to confess, or just asked Binghe to help him, or tried to tell Zhangmen-shixiong more of the truth, or any number of things… I was so afraid of so much… Binghe was right to be angry and hurt, would have been right to claim his due..”

“Shizun.” Binghe had shaken his head. “As long as you don’t hate me or run away anymore, it doesn’t matter. No, even if you hated me, as long as I can still see you, anything is good. After all, if I hadn’t gone, I couldn’t have hoped to control my demon blood or learn to hide myself, I probably would have been killed by some righteous cultivator… this way I can hope to prove myself someday..”

Prove what??? Exactly what did the Luo Binghe have to prove to anyone??? Peerlessly beautiful, objectively the most beautiful in the world, with Mobei-Jun at his back and call, effortlessly powerful, who in the last few loops had conquered the Hissing Wastes, retrieved the Mirror of Forgotten Dreams, had defeated the seven barbed Wingipede, had overcome all four Trials of the Inner Heart (without any wives!) and had collected so many miracle treasures and plants in general that there was no point in counting them all. The only thing being proved here was how op Binghe was! (Or how creatively bankrupt Airplane had been in naming dozens of species of ‘utterly unique’ peerless flawless pure snow whatever plants!)

The point was, for better or worse, Binghe had done a better job of explaining the Abyss to himself than Shen Yuan ever could, his mood seemed to be much better, Shen Yuan was getting a firsthand tour of all of the wonders of Proud Immortal Demon Way without lifting a finger, and even the side characters were getting catharsis! Everyone was sorting out their secrets and problems and it was quite frankly offensive that the loop still wouldn’t break.

So he made- just perhaps- a mistake.

“Binghe, when you asked Mobei-Jun about this clan, did you ask your Shang-shishu?”

Binghe frowned. “A-Yuan is still thinking about such things? Why would Shang-shishu have said anything useful? Hasn’t this disciple already brought you everything you wanted?”

At the time it had seemed like more of Binghe’s silly petulance. But the next loop, Binghe refused to leave his side for any more adventures, and the ceasefire with Tianlang-Jun and Zhuzhi-lang ended on sight, with Binghe drawing Xin Mo in the space of a breath. They’d been more or less ignoring eachother since Tianlang-Jun had been occupied tormenting the Old Palace Master, with occasional family bonding moments when Binghe discovered some particularly intricate trap or savage monster that could be used on another reset. Together they’d even managed to extract the tragic details of Su Xiyan’s fate, if not all the way up to Binghe’s conception, at least as far as her imprisonment and poisoning.

But now -

“Shizun, they hurt you. Kidnapped you. Put you back in this body, poisoned you with their blood… of course your Bingmei can’t allow them near you anymore. I won’t ever allow you to be hurt. No, they shouldn’t even look at you.”

“Shizun, even if your martial brothers see you again they’ll only treat you as someone you don’t want to be.”

“Shizun, even if you won’t choose me, even if you have no other choice, I still can’t let them hurt you anymore.”

Tianlang-Jun had been quite content to maim his son in a very off the cuff, lighthearted manner and go on with his days, commenting idly on young love and demonic courting. Zhuzhi-lang was a little more unfortunate, since he took his debts to ‘Master Shen’ so seriously- the fights were prolonged and Shen Yuan frequently found himself pulled around by bloodmites again! The progress was backwards!

This was about when he’d tried burying Tianlang-Jun under rubble. It hadn’t notably done much to keep the family separated. Or change the tone of the conversations he’d been subjected too upon waking.

And he was so, so, so tired of waking up on this stone slab.

Worse, he was running out of ideas. Three years of Proud Immortal Demon Way, and he was beginning to think that they were genuinely stuck, given that there was no wife for Binghe to push down and no miracle item that had worked to overcome the trap.

He had tried everything. Even emotional honesty! Did Binghe have to marry Qiu Haitang? Would a round of papapa break a time loop? Why? How could Airplane possibly justify that nonsense? If he could have, it would have been in Proud Immortal Demon Way, right?

System, any help? Any insight? Anything useful?!

[Unfortunately, special edition download ‘A modicum of self-awareness’ is not available for download! System is prohibited from altering User consciousness outside of punishment protocols! We hope your free and unedited experience correcting this world is rewarding! User does have enough points to purchase special items, however!
( っ˶°૦°˶)づ ✧]

“Like what, exactly? Never mind, never mind, if it will help and costs less than three thousand points, load it in, don’t be stingy!”

[For three thousand points, a luxury deluxe combo package is available! Includes a (hint), a (free gift) a (stroke of fortune) and a (small scenario pusher)]

“Yes, I already said it, download, download already!”

[Downloading now! Time remaining: 8 hours, 11 minutes.]

“What? But the loop will restart!”

[Time remaining: 8 hours, 56 minutes!]

“What hardware are you running on? What’s with the video game download times? The free gift has better be worth this terrible user experience!”

~*~
[Installing…]

Shen Yuan woke up on a very familiar stone slab. He rolled over and cursed, only to find himself being watched by a very familiar set of eyes.

“Immortal Master Shen. What a surprise to see you here!” Tianlang-Jun chuckled, pleased with his own joke.

“If the repetition is wearing on the venerable Tianlang-June’s memory so badly, he should seek a physician.” Shen Yuan groaned. “Mu Qingfang is the best there is, he even has some years of familiarity with Heavenly Demons-“

Tianlang-Jun laughed again, an empty sound in an empty room. “Master Shen is so quick to assume his Sect will be as kind as he is to me and mine. History suggests otherwise. No, I’m still content to stay here. But I did wonder about Master Shen’s intentions a little…”

“What part of my intentions are unclear?” Shen Yuan was free from the need for excessive formality, so his token politeness devolved quickly into modern conventions as he flopped back down on his stone ‘bed’

“Ah, well… it’s true that my son and I are hardly close, even by demon standards. Still, I’m curious. Master Shen favors him so obviously- sometimes. Cares for his wounds, holds him close, bares himself body and soul-“

“Those books are not up for discussion.” Shen Yuan rolled himself over, closing his eyes. Maybe… ten minutes? Until Binghe arrived? More if he brought snacks instead of ingredients…

“A pity, but perhaps next time. Because, you see, in other times, Master Shen runs away, calls for other people, rejects his advances and pleas. A cold lover is all very well and good, Master Shen, but so is knowing when to stop.”

“We aren’t- is this about Su Xiyan?”

“Hmm, Xiyan had a marvelous way of pushing me down when she was done with my nonsense. She took her three silvers worth and more. I was young and innocent- it was all dreadfully exciting. But Master Shen hardly seems the type…” Tianlang-Jun tsked. “Ordinarily it’s no trouble, however you like to play, but Xin Mo is beginning to present some difficulty.”

Shen Yuan paled. “Xin Mo. But it shouldn’t- he’s been going out over and over to fight- and the loop resets us every day-“

“Master Shen is as well informed as ever!” Tianlang-Jun smiled “But the toll Xin Mo takes is mental- and cumulative. I did try to take it from him, at first, but it’s very deeply rooted already- he must have had to fight very hard with it, at his level of skill, to become so…” Tianlang-Jun waved a hand, idly, indicating everything and nothing. “Anyway, Master Shen should consider the risks of trying to exit this loop carefully- he will follow you, and he will try to protect you. I wonder if Master Shen is prepared for what that would look like?”

Shen Yuan was very aware, actually! There were lots and lots of plot lines about Xin Mo, the protagonist’s golden finger and greatest adversary all in one! Qi deviations! Backlash! Madness! Battle rages that could level a mountain! Only the stamina of a Heavenly Demon could possibly survive such a blade! And of course, the merging of the human and demon realms…

Tianlang-Jun smiled. “As far as the results, I’m fine with anything. Once I leave this place, ultimately it’s all the same, so I’m happy to just leave the humans a parting gift and go my own way. But Master Shen seems entirely convinced that the Sects will atone for what they’ve done, and has certainly proven willing to deliver up those who won’t be so obliging…”

[Hint activated! Calm Xin Mo! Stroke of good fortune activated! Character: Tianlang-Jun is helpful towards User 02 after prolonged efforts at diplomacy!]

Shifty system! Wouldn’t that have happened anyway? He’d worked hard to clear Su Xiyan’s good name! Or at least worked hard to stay away from Tianlang-Jun while he beat the answers he deserved out of a limbless old man. He’d still helped, though, so why was the System acting like getting a little goodwill back was worth so many points?

Still, it gave him something to think about. Xin Mo fed on Binghe’s inner demons, some of which came from his childhood and many of which came from the Abyss. His inexplicable love for Shen Qingqiu had probably come from that fear of loss from those early days, right? So if he could address that fear, maybe?

He still wasn’t certain how this would get him out of the loop, but averting Xin Mo’s hold until Binghe could find a way to stop using it would also be good, and it was at the very least a project. So he sought Binghe out immediately. Who knew better than him how to assure Binghe of his loyalty? Binghe had always been predictable on the topic! Even in this bent world, without wives, Binghe had still spared Mobei-Jun and accepted his oath, and apparently Sha Hualings as well! She was more warlord than wife in this case, but her oath still kept her at his side!

Actually, in this timeline, both Sha Hualing and Mobei-Jun had attacked Binghe and Shen Qingqiu- both remained in his inner court. So clearly it wouldn’t be impossible for him to do the same!

“Binghe?” He asked softly. The demon emperor didn’t seem too upset, yet, but his eyes snapped to Shen Yuan’s face with a slightly disturbing intensity. “Hey. I’ve been thinking about.. a lot of stuff. Can we spend some time… somewhere a little nicer than this, today? I want to talk. Maybe that little bamboo garden in your Underground Palace?”

“That’s not a good enough place.” Binghe frowned. “Those useless demons can’t even make bamboo grow.”

“Binghe, if you just take something out of its home and throw it in a new environment like that, naturally it’ll need some time to adjust. It needs patience and care, but it will grow fine. It was a good place.”

“Have I still not been patient enough?” Binghe sighed. “A-Yuan, if it’s comfort you want, I can take you somewhere better. There’s a secret realm that-“

“I’m still something of an expert in plants and beasts, even if I’m not the original, you know. If you take me there, I can tell you what the bamboo needs to grow better. Besides, I know it’s safe there, and private, and comfortable enough for- for the two of us.” He frowned, then blinked, offering a hand to touch Binghe’s wrist. Sure enough, his demonic qi was wild and unrestrained, but his spiritual pathways were clouded and unstable. He grumbled a little as he sent a stream of his own qi to smooth the worst of it gently. “Here, will this not make the trip more pleasant?”

Binghe caught his hand, stroked his wrist in return. “Shizun, this body…”

“Binghe did very well restoring it. Still, someday… Those mushroom bodies are hard to grow well, but I’d be less rushed and have better quality help. Someday, I’d really like to send this body back to the Sect Leader and let him mourn properly.”

“Always other people with Shizun.” Binghe tried to keep his voice light. He wasn’t a very good actor, Shen Yuan thought. Or maybe that was Xin Mo, lacing his words with vinegar? But he’d just calmed Xin Mo a little…

“Naturally if I had a body of my own I could live freely at Binghe’s side, and this one could return home to rest. Not the happiest ending, but at least closure is an ending.”

“Closure.” Binghe laughed bitterly. “Three years in the Abyss, only for Shizun to run away, to die. Five years in hell trying to save him, only for him to slide away again immediately. I stormed Cang Qiong for a chance to speak even a little, only for you to be pulled away again. If that’s what A-Yuan wants to speak about, leaving again, this disciple won’t- I can’t-“

“It’s not. That matter can wait.” Shen Yuan promised. “I want to go to the demon realm with Binghe, away from others for a little while.” Away from Tianlang-Jun’s leering and Zhuzhi-lang’s good intentions. Away from this stupid Mausoleum arc and all its pointless, agonizing filler.

Something about those words worked. Binghe smiled, cut a portal with Xin Mo, and pulled Shen Yuan into the heart of his palace, that small replica of their home together.

Mercifully, Binghe gave him a few moments, making tea and snacks while he found a fan and cleaned up a little-the dust and grit of the mausoleum felt like it was part of him, but he could at least switch into a clean outer robe and comb out his hair a little. Binghe even helped, wordlessly removing his guan and combing out the tangles he woke with every single day for the last-

It was nice. Domestic. Quiet. He took a deep breath.

“A-Yuan had something private to say?” Binghe asked, quietly.

“This Master- no, fuck. I’m so tired of the endless formality. I want to just say things.” Shen Yuan groaned. “Binghe, I’ve been thinking a lot about you. How worried you’ve been. How much I hurt you. I wanted to avoid being discovered and forced out of this body, but.. you suffered. No matter how many reasons we both make up to explain it away now, you still suffered.”

“Shizun.” Binghe said, quietly. “Don’t. Not about that. Not about the Abyss.”

“I have to. I have to. I don’t know exactly what it was, but I know enough. I’ve studied the Abyss, you know. I knew where you would go, and I-“

“This Binghe has been in the Abyss, and this Binghe has held your corpse. I would choose the first a thousand times if it spared me the second. Never again. Never ever again. In the Mausoleum Shizun will always be safe, will always come back, will always look at me. That’s enough.”

Except that it wasn’t- Shen Yuan had felt what Xin Mo was doing to him. Had seen him visibly deteriorate. Tianlang-Jun’s warning had been obviously correct. So it wasn’t enough. Maybe nothing ever would be.

“Binghe, I ran away from you because I was terrified- no matter what you did to me, I’d deserve it. Even my life couldn’t repay it. But you still deserve it. I- I needed to make peace with that, I’m not sure I can, or have, or ever will, but… if my death won't give you closure, if you really want me at your side, then I’ll swear my life to you instead. No matter where you go or what you do, I’ll- Binghe?”

Binghe was tearing up, his eyes shining with pinprick stars in vast, dark galaxies. “I don’t believe it, I don’t dare believe it. Is it another hallucination? Is it Xin Mo? Shizun, don’t say things like that, I really can’t bear it.”

“If that sword is causing such problems already, Binghe should throw it away. This Master is serious- I will give you my oath.”

“I can’t throw it away.” Binghe sounded a little lost. “Without it, I can’t bring Shizun tea anymore. I can’t bring him sunlight, I can’t bring snacks or fans or any of the treasures he always wants to see for himself, I can’t keep him safe when he wants to see beasts, I can’t-“

Binghe was too big, these days, to pull into his lap, so the result of his instinctive attempts to do so ended up with him staring down at a man half in his arms and half sprawled on the floor.

“I had expected far worse than missing a few snacks. I would have deserved far worse. This master was fine in the Water Prison, this master will be fine without tea. Binghe matters more than the things that sword can do.”

“Shizun was not doing well in the Water Prison.” Binghe objected.

That was true, so he ignored it. “Anyway, Binghe still has the full power of a heavenly demon and is still an accomplished cultivator. Zheng Yang is still on Qing Jing peak. Binghe still has Mobei-Jun if he needs to travel. There’s nothing he needs from that sword to make me content, if he wishes for me to be content.”

Binghe frowned. “Naturally I want A-Yuan to be happy, but… in order to do those things… A-Yuan really will say anything to get away from the Mausoleum, won’t he? To get out, to get away again.”

“I don’t know how!” Shen Yuan howled. “I don’t have any more ideas, ok? I have tried everything. Dying won’t fix it. Treasure won’t fix it. Emotional honesty won’t fix it, I almost lost my hold on this world just to give you my name, I helped your father reconcile with the past, I’ve done everything I can think of and we’re all just stuck, ok? And I hate it, I hate watching you fall apart, I hate how every morning whatever happiness you have is gone again, I hate hearing that you’re hallucinating and knowing that you can't move past shattering your own psyche in your dreamscape, I hate not having the answers, I hate it but there’s nothing I can do.” He took a gasping, shuddering breath, then closed his eyes and pushed ahead, trying not to look at whatever face Binghe was making.

“So no, this isn’t some clever plan to escape, this is just me wishing like hell for you to be happy and promising that if you want me at your side I’ll be there, ok?”

Binghe was staring up at him, through those thick, unfairly long lashes. To be fair, it had been a long rant, worthy of Peerless Cucumber’s forum days in word count if not in vitriol, maybe it was a little weird-

“This disciple was wrong.” Binghe whispered. “Shizun, A-Yuan, I won’t misunderstand you anymore, I swear it.”

“Good, see that you don’t.” He nodded, satisfied. “Then, for the oath- where is Xiu Ya? We can’t really do a full ceremony like this, but I can at least offer you my sword- Binghe! What on earth do you think you’re-“

Binghe had lunged for him, a move that triggered every one of his instincts to run, and so he’d jerked backwards, but there was a table beside him, and somehow now he was-

[Small scenario pusher automatically activated as part of hosts earlier purchase! Please enjoy (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧]

Now he was on his back, his clothes rumpled and his loose hair spilling around him, his breath unsteady as Binghe paused the biting assault on his lips to take in what had happened, and the sound he made was supposed to be outrage, but he didn’t have the breath, so it was just a short, strangled gasp.

“Shizun” Binghe whispered, awe in his expression and something soft and heavy in his voice. “Shizun, you’ve made me so happy, I’ll never be unhappy again.”

Shen Yuan squawked up at the person above him, but the fact was that in the moment, with Binghe looking down at him with a worshipful expression, with his thick curls falling around him, hearing that eager promise he felt…

Naturally he was annoyed! Binghe had just promised not to misunderstand anymore! He’d bitten at Shen Yuan like an over-excited puppy! He’d-

“Shizun, even if you promise, it might not be enough, even if you mean it, even if I want it, so, Shizun, please, please, please say yes, please-“

“Binghe, I- stop, stop, stop biting, how are you even saying anything when you keep biting my lips!?”

“This disciple is wrong, but begs A-Yuan to indulge him, just a little bit?” Binghe’s lips were soft, just above his own, his hands were very… warm, very present, and the conviction that he was straight was strong! …But the world bent itself so naturally around the protagonist's will that he simply couldn’t imagine things being anything other than this. Couldn’t imagine not burning under those eyes, not reaching up to touch Binghe’s cheek. Couldn’t imagine not gently wiping away the tears that were already starting to form. How could someone so powerful and masterful be so tense? It felt like he was trembling.

No one had ever not loved the protagonist when he chose them. For him, people did stupid, foolish things, gave up everything, and counted it little hardship. What was more inevitable than Shen Qingqiu, targeted by that love, giving up his life willingly? What was more inevitable than loving Binghe?

“Like this.” He grumbled, using his fingers, curling into Binghe’s hair entirely of their own accord, to guide Binghe down into something less painful. He really… why did he have to teach a stallion protagonist even this?

There was still some biting, Binghe’s teeth were sharp and he seemed to love worrying at Shen Yuan’s lips, but as soon as Shen Yuan parted them to breathe, to scold, to complain, to protest at his own lack of protest, Binghe proved that he could offer some softness- in the form of his questing, invasive tongue, fervently exploring without mercy. It was so very warm, Binghe was very warm, so much so that Shen Yuan's face also felt warm just allowing him so close. Instinctively, he reached up to hug Binghe a little closer.

“Shizun, don’t hide your face from me, don’t hide anything anymore, this husband will cherish it all.” Binghe promised.

“What husband? We aren’t married-“

“It’s ok, Shizun, this lord accepts your oath wholeheartedly, even if the wedding hasn’t happened yet, you’ve made me very happy.”

Wasn’t it backwards? Wasn’t the wife the one to cutely say ‘you’ve made me the happiest woman in the world’ and cry? How had this happened, why was it so weirdly mixed up?

Why was he reacting? To the idea of Binghe being his husband? What porn logic was that?

“Binghe-“ he faltered, and Binghe responded by pulling him up off the floor and into his arms, scattering kisses over his face.

“Shizun, Shizun” Binghe couldn’t stop saying it, over and over, calling for him without hesitation and looking ecstatic every time he saw Shen Yuan look back up at him.

“Don’t call me that in bed.” He snapped, before the words registered and well after they could be called back. “I have a name.” He added, desperately trying to salvage at least a little dignity.

“A-Yuan. A-Yuan!” That only made the kisses come faster, and Binghe was quick to gather him up and settle him onto the bed. The bed that was suddenly very reminiscent of his on Qing Jing Peak, and was now very full of a demonic emperor, who’d recreated that bed in loving detail.

“Binghe, you-“ he started, but then his words failed him utterly.

Dual cultivation was a term that got thrown around a lot in Proud Immortal Demon Way. Yes, Binghe could heal and improve cultivation and grant powerups and so on with his magical dick! There was no end to the bullshit it could do! Even side characters in this world used the power of papapa to level up! Mu Qingfang, the best healer in the world in a world where sex healed, held his own as the Peak Lord who could and would immobilize Liu Qingge and even the Sect Leader. No one wondered how he got to be so capable, or how he staved off his own qi deviations in the face of the behavior of his martial siblings.

So it wasn’t that Shen Yuan didn’t know.

But-

But Binghe’s qi flowed in and out of him like a tide, filling him to bursting and then drawing him back into Binghe’s very core. It surged back and forth between them, carrying him, welcoming him, sheltering him, letting him put down new roots and grow and bloom. It burned away petty fears and doubts, exposing the love that he’d found for words on a page, for his sticky sheep, for the man Binghe had become because of and in spite of him. The shape of that love was vast and nebulous- to much, too hard to pin down or define, but like this he couldn’t escape it- he was here, he wanted nothing more than to be here, now, with this person-

“Oh” was all he could whisper, as his core flooded and burned and bloomed with light.

“A-Yuan” Binghe whispered back. “Do you like it? I made sure when I repaired that body that our energies would be complimentary, I made sure that if A-Yuan ever chose me that he’d never suffer trouble to his cultivation ever again-“

“Binghe… Binghe did well.” He murmured. Dimly, distantly, he was aware of problems- the faint, leeching drain from Xin Mo, the slight discomfort in the angle of his neck, the prickling heat that was building up inside him against the folds of his robes, the amature way Binghe was grinding against him, the undignified sounds he was making as his own hips shifted, seeking to alleviate the pressure in his lower dantian against the solid weight of Binghe above him.

But petty mortal details seemed so insignificant right now. They were so distant, and the ecstasy was immediate. His hands, always the first to betray him, wandered happily into Binghe’s curls, then down Binghe’s chest, pulling at the clothes between them. They even pinched a little at that particularly sensitive bud, Binghe had always appreciated the rougher wives, and if the biting was any indication, that was still very true!

Binghe made an eager sound at the playful torment, and another, lower, more desperate sound when Shen Yuan tried to bite a little at his neck and shoulders. He started tearing away clothes in ernest, his hands everywhere, as if they could gather all of Shen Yuan up at once if only they tried.

Somehow, under that eager gaze, he felt warmer with his clothes off. He definitely felt warmer looking at Binghe with his clothes off, his slender waist and long legs, his powerful forearms, all of him perfection. All of that perfection turned upon him, with the too-human swollen lips and faint red marks of those errant love bites…

And then that third fucking leg of a Heavenly Pillar slotted between his thighs as Binghe eagerly tried to spread his legs apart, and the warmth vanished in a rush of cold terror. There was no way that thing would fit! A whole hand would have a better chance!

“Absolutely not,” he snapped. Trying to escape Binghe’s hold was like trying to escape a needy octopus, and squirming in his grasp was having counterproductive results- was it still getting bigger? How?!

But Binghe did still, tears flowing from his eyes-a sight nearly enough to make him relent and suffer through getting impaled by that lethal weapon. “Shizun, please-“

Shen Yuan placed a finger over Binghe’s lips, gesturing for silence. At the way Binghe’s lips parted a little, he figured it was easier to just slide the finger inside a little. It wasn’t anything weird! He just.. he didn’t want to loose the good mood, and it kept Binghe from interrupting. It was also soft and slick and warm and made Binghe’s tears look a little different, suddenly his cucumber-bro was a little more invested, and wouldn’t Binghe be quieter and more obedient if he just-

“Binghe, it’s fine if no one has taught you these things, but they’re still important to know. Binghe’s size is-“ -unearthly, ludicrous, enormous, but none of those seemed like things to actually say- “a challenge even for a skilled cultivator. No matter who Binghe does such things with in the future, he must always take great care to-“ he floundered “to-“

Why did he have to teach a stallion protagonist how to do him? How to do anyone? He wasn’t an expert, ok, he’d never- he was frantically trying to recall Airplane’s mediocre porn to get through this, and maybe some of his meimei’s trashy novels! He’d skimmed over a lot! He really couldn’t remember anything, with Binghe’s tongue curling around his fingers and turning his mind to static.

“Oil” he croaked. “Something slippery, what the hell do people use as lube here? Was there some plant? And you’re supposed to.. prepare, with…”

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Why the hell do I need flavors? No one is putting their mouth anywhere near.. that! He wept and howled internally, before his mind short circuited again, reminding him of the slick wet heat of Binghe’s mouth. How that would feel, how Binghe might feel if he, someday, tried to-
Give me the melon, quickly, and shut down for a bit!

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“Shizun?” Binghe sounded uncertain, torn between gently rubbing against his thighs and genuine fear.

How the hell was he supposed to access his inventory when he was naked? Was there just going to be a bottle conveniently on the desk? Or- no! “Binghe, let this master reach his clothes, there’s something that will help.”

Binghe proved unwilling to let go of him, leaning over him to reach the fallen inner robes on the floor. Sure enough, inside his qiankun sleeves was a little jar of polished nephrite, filled with a viscous… something.
The scent was immediately nostalgic, an artificial, “refreshing” scent that had very little in common with a cucumber or a melon. Wordlessly, he handed it to Binghe.

“….”
“….”

Oh god, he had to-
Fine. Fine! It couldn’t be helped!

“Spread it. Use a lot. Use it all.”
Binghe gave him a wide-eyed look of polite incomprehension.

So he did the only possible thing, ignoring the beaming smile he got as he scooped out some of the lube and slowly wrapped his slicked fingers around Binghe’s cock. There was a certain satisfaction to be had as Binghe went from pleased and smug to shocked and overwhelmed, in hearing him laugh with awe and pleasure.

He wasn’t braced for the counterattack, lost in Binghe’s eyes, his voice, his little pleading sounds, until he felt those long, clever fingers reaching around him, tentatively circling. They hesitated only a moment, toying around with the tender skin, and then, just as Shen Yuan was about to scold him - for what, he wasn’t sure, but he felt like he needed to lodge some protest- they slid inside with a soft, wet sound.

At first, it wasn’t anything but a little pressure, enough to make his fingers tighten on Binghe’s cock with a little gasp. But Binghe seemed unsatisfied with that reaction, sliding deeper, renewing his deep, gnawing kisses.
“A-Yuan is so tight, so soft, perfect, Shizun, I’m going to put another one in-“

The pressure grew, the slight burn of the stretch and the torment of Binghe thrusting and twisting with his eager explorations. A sound escaped him, and Binghe drew in a sharp breath. A certain itching feeling bloomed under his skin, heat suddenly building as his half-hard cock felt as if it were being stroked in tandem with Binghe’s. Binghe took his cry of outraged pleasure as all the encouragement he needed to begin worshiping every inch of his body.

He kissed at Shen Yuan’s ears, whispering about how sweet they looked when he blushed, he slid his free hand over Shen Yuans chest, toying almost idly with his flushed nipples, he ground relentlessly into Shen Yuan’s hands, eager and shameless. He seemed to revel in causing Shen Yuan to stutter and lose his rhythm, in the sight of his flushed face, in the way his whole body shuddered as his hole was tormented.

Then, as a third finger slowly pushed home, making him keen as the fullness suddenly sent sparks shooting through him. Something had changed, there was a certain place inside him that felt very raw and tender and made him feel like screaming. Could it be called pleasure? It was overwhelming!
Yet the moment the fingers retreated, even a slight amount, preparing to thrust enthusiastically back in, he found his body grinding down onto them shamelessly.

And oh, but Binghe noticed, the way his sounds changed pitch, the way his writhing found new focus, the way he chased that touch again even though it felt like he couldn’t stand the way it lit his nerves on fire for another moment. “That place feels good, A-Yuan? A-Yuan has to say what feels good, ok? He has to tell his husband how to please him.”

“What kind of line is tha-aah!” Binghe was relentless, and pleased only when he was incoherent, even when he pleaded for encouragement, it truly was ridiculous!

Only when Binghe had teased him into a lax, floating state did he withdraw himself from Shen Yuans fingers. He hadn’t finished - demonic stamina was legendary! It wasn’t that Shen Yuan had given him a bad hand-job, right?! But his pillar was leaking enough precum that the lube glistening down his length seemed like an afterthought, and he was gentle about grasping Shen Yuan’s waist and firmly lifting his legs.

His first thrust still hurt. Even with lube, even with preparation, even with Shen Yuan dazed with pleasure beneath him, too much was too much, and Binghe was over-eager and was already hammering away at his insides without giving him any space to breathe. But the fullness dragging along his walls, lighting that spot up over and over, was indescribable.
He felt like Binghe was hollowing him out, digging deeper and deeper into him, as if he was terrified of not knowing how every inch felt. He thrust in the hilt and cried that he needed more, harder, Shizun, please-! As if he wasn’t the one deciding how hard to go!

Then, just as Shen Yuan resigned himself to not being able to actively contribute anymore, to sprawling in his pillows while Binghe made himself at home, to watching the taught skin of his stomach pulse and throb as Binghe pistoned in and out, Binghe started the qi exchange up again.

It was a slow pulse in his core, this time, steady and unbearably intimate. His entire body and spirit were inexorably pulled into Binghe’s rhythm, deeply obsessive, hungry, all consuming lust and even greater love. It was a desperate thing to experience, and he found himself reaching back out, to try and hold Binghe, to contain the flood, to answer.

It was his last thought that could even remotely be called coherent- Binghe’s demonic blood and spiritual qi attacked from all angles, and his insides had finally stretched to allow him to fit Binghe as if they were made for eachother, the pain had settled into a burn that made him feel a little insane. That spot was battered at, over and over, a siege that could only bring every wall he had down.

He came harder than he’d known was possible, painting his thighs and Binghe’s stomach with spend, and went utterly limp. His face felt wet, his skin felt soaked, Binghe’s blissful expression was unbearable to watch, but he couldn’t look away.

Binghe sobbed above him, his only coherent words being ‘beautiful’ “wife” and “happy.” He kept going, while Shen Yuan feebly wiped at his tears.
“Always crying, shouldn’t I be the one crying? Look at the mess Binghe is making, and he’s still not satisfied?” But the words were shaky and fond, the harshness only there out of defensive habit. The overstimulation was teetering on the wrong side of too much, and if Binghe went any deeper his organs were in real danger!

“Shizun, wife, please, please, call for me, please, promise me, call me that-“ Binghe’s pace was desperate, now, his voice wrecked and ragged.

“Call- call you-w-what? Binghe! Luo Binghe- husband-“

If Shen Yuan had imagined himself to be stuffed full before Binghe had finished, then he’d only himself to blame for his lack of understanding.
Full was one thing, heavy and dragging, but the sudden rush of heat and wet sloshing within him, plugged in by that weapon, getting fucked in deeper and deeper before it could spill out- that was a different kind of full altogether. He felt he could taste it in his throat, and Binghe remained in him for several moments to linger in that tight, wet heat.

“Shizun, I wish it wouldn’t come out, I wish you could stay full of me always.” He whispered.

“Naturally it must come out, Binghe, this master needs to get cleaned up.” He grumbled. The System was already telling him how many b points a plug would be, as well as several ‘enchanted’ variations of toys that looked suspiciously like a Bad Dragon catalog.

To Binghe’s credit, he was very attentive and meticulous about caring for him, carrying him to a hot spring, feeding him snacks and cleaning away the blood and stickiness gently. Indeed, despite the fact that his cultivation and Binghe’s blood were more than enough to ensure that he was fine and only a little sore, Binghe seemed determined to make sure that he didn’t have to move at all, all evening. He was bathed, worshipfully dressed in the softest silks, laid back into a cleanly made bed, and pampered with snacks and sweets until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore.

He woke up on a cold stone slab, and howled a curse to the heavens. What world was this?! It certainly wasn’t Proud Immortal Demon Way! If this were actually Proud Immortal Demon Way, sex with the Protagonist would have fixed it!

If he had to look even one more time at Binghe’s uncertain, painful expression, he was going to go insane.

“Good morning to Immortal Master Shen, as well!” Tianlang-Jun greeted him brightly. “So angry, so early? Ah, did the reset perhaps… interrupt something good?”

“Not good enough, it would seem.” He groaned.

“Oh, on the contrary! Master Shen had slept rather later than usual, today.” Tianlang-Jun raised an eyebrow, playfully. “So he’s missed some excitement. That son of mine has asked his father how to leave this place without using Xin Mo, or a herd of demonic beasts. The ceremony to recognize him as my heir is a tedious one, and took a few hours, and sealing Xin Mo may take some time, but as soon as he’s content with all of that, we can simply leave.”

“Just like that? No, wait, I missed Binghe’s inheritance ceremony? He didn’t wake me for something so momentous?” Airplane had never detailed a Heavenly Demon inheritance ceremony, only the Mobei clan rituals. He’d missed a chance to see a secret of this world?! “Does that mean he’s taken on your martial aspect? Even though you’re alive and this can’t be said to be your original body?”

Tianlang-Jun laughed again. “Always the scholar, Master Shen! As if I had enough martial aspect left to spare him any. Heavenly Demons aren’t like the Abyssal clans, to eat each other at every turn. Besides, he won’t need it. Su Xiyan’s cultivation is a far better legacy. But it legitimizes his hold on the Demon realm and establishes a clear line of succession, and it means Zhuzhi-lang will have someone looking after him.” Tianlang-Jun’s smile was fond. “Since it seems I won’t have to fight very hard, I can scrape a few more years out of this body. Consider it a wedding gift, if you like! A few years for just the two of you! I look forward to the ballads you’ll inspire!”

“The venerable Tianlang-Jun won’t be exterminating the Sects after all?” He blinked.

“Oh, I’ll be by to have a word with Yue Qi. Never doubt that. And I won’t be returning the Old Palace Master, such as he is- he can stay right here and now, I think. But ultimately, I never was much of a fighter.”

“You… you crushed Binghe’s head the first day you met him? You went toe to toe with him while he had Xin Mo? You used -“

Tianlang-Jun laughed. “Skill matters more than inclination in a pinch, Master Shen! Do remind Yue Qi that my inclinations will change if there’s any more discussion of mountains, however. Your marriage would be best taken as a diplomatic gesture.”

Shen Yuan thought about it. But, ah, it really didn’t take too much thought, did it?

“If you stop being a dick to Binghe and stop reading porn at me, I’ll lend you Cang Qiong’s foremost expert in Heavenly Demons. I’m sure if you squeeze him hard enough some useful things about repairing that body will pop out.”

“Oh, Master Shen is so confident! Hasn’t Immortal Master Mu seen quite enough of Heavenly Demon hospitality already?” Tianlang-Jun blinked, but…
Binghe had his fathers eyes, and many of his expressions as well, and in Binghe, that lighthearted scoff and playful confusion could be a bit… vulnerable. It really was hard to imagine anything better than the last twenty years had offered, wasn’t it? Hope didn’t seem easy for him.

But he… also wasn’t planning to remain in the loop, it seemed. Perhaps he was ready for something a little bit different. Perhaps they all were.

~*~

In the end, it was still a horrible mess.

Breaking the loop was as anticlimactic as Binghe returning to lead his new wife out of the Mausoleum in state (and in fine robes that he certainly hadn’t managed to aquire in under twenty four hours, which implied that he’d had them ready for… Shen Yuan wasn’t ready to think about that.)

(He had also found the discarded message in Chinglish that Binghe had apparently declined to deliver, back from when he’d sent him to ask Mobei-Jun for information. The garbled ‘just fuck it out, bro, that’s how it always works’ was enough for him to concede in a rage that his shidi was a useless rat and ignoring him had been for the best.)

Waking up the next morning, back and hips aching, seeing actual sunlight pouring into the very comfortable room that Binghe had installed them in was monumental, and Binghe was quick to suggest more ways to celebrate. The brat had been listening attentively to Tianlang-Jun’s reading sessions, and it showed. Shen Yuan would have complained more, but he now new exactly what Binghe’s mouth looked like wrapped around his cock, flushed and teary and fucked out, and while he wasn’t planning on anything so ridiculous as offering to top the protagonist, he also wasn’t discouraging more blow jobs. None of Binghe’s wives had ever seen that view, he was certain! They’d never have been able to share that expression, the harem would have gone up in flames!

Qiu Haitang had been allowed to leave the loop by swearing her service to Zhuzhi-lang, who seemed to think that she’d done him some kindness by helping him pin down Shen Qingqiu in Jin Lan city, and by delivering the Old Palace Master to them. She had opted to remain in seclusion away from the cultivation world for a time, effectively using her power-up - a fresh squeeze of heavenly demon blood- to remain in the Mausoleum and tend to the family shrines of past Heavenly Demons. (Mostly Zhuzhi-langs mother, it turned out, but Shen Yuan suspected that Su Xiyan’s bones would be placed in a shrine very soon now. Tianlang-Jun had already declared her Empress, if only posthumously.) It was not a perfect solution, but Airplane’s world had very few perfect solutions, and both she and Shen Yuan felt at peace about the compromise.

Xin Mo turned out to be so deeply rooted in Luo Binghe that destroying it outright seemed impossible without Binghe dying. For the moment, however, Binghe was very happy to stop using it, seal it away, and cope with its drain by the usual method of regular papapa. Not even a liar as accomplished as Luo Binghe had been able to keep the glee from his expression as he gravely explained his needs - at least weekly, preferably more often. It wasn’t a long term solution, but it felt like a step towards the right direction.

Cang Qiong was overjoyed at his return safe and sound after leaving as a hostage, for all of thirty seconds. Then the three Heavenly Demons escorting him home were noticed, and the outcry was such a mess that he turned around to head back to the demon realms immediately. Cooler heads, in the form of Yue Qingyuan, eventually prevailed, but that also only lasted a few moments, as Qi Qingqi and Liu Qingge found out in short order about the wedding. The wedding that had never actually happened, that certainly hadn’t involved a courting period or bride price or dowry. The memory of Qi Qingqi shouting at Tianlang-Jun about whether this could even be counted as a demonic bridenapping at all was one he would never be able to forget, unfortunately, and Yue Qingyuan looked as if he felt the same. It was clear that Tianlang-Jun would be getting his apology (it seemed anyone who had brought Shen Qingqiu home would have been thanked on bended knee, and Yue Qingyuan had to be stopped from offering truly outrageous reparations more than once. Stay strong, Yue-bro! Pledging Shang Qinghua and Mu Qingfang’s aid in healing was one thing, but don’t give up your ban on Regret of Chunshan! Don’t do it, bro! Your shidi is begging you!

Even Shang Qinghua was permitted to return in state, if only because no one had wanted to organize a wedding of this scale without him. When he learned that his punishment was to help Tianlang-Jun recover, he shrugged it off, but when he was handed the request to find a fortunate date for a wedding and then oversee that wedding, he had to be stopped from making a desperate break back to the North.

It was all so noisy, and so chaotic, and so new, that it seemed more like a beginning than an ending.

Even so, it felt like the beginning of a very good ending.