Chapter Text
Vi could hear the explosion. Feel the rumbling as it shook the Hexgate. But there was nothing she could do, she felt helpless, alone and her body was shaking head to toe, the sobs becoming something that she wasn’t even aware she was doing, but controlling her. The pain of losing Jinx, something she thought she was prepared for months ago, was hitting her like a ton of bricks. It sucked the air out of her, she began hyperventilating before she even realised it.
Jinx was gone… Vander was gone. Her family, gone. There was so much hope, so much so that she thought she might have a chance to start over with them both, to have a… normal life. But now, that was impossible.
Vi couldn’t almost believe what was happening, but the images played her mind, listening to the explosion, the reminiscent smoke lingering in the air - there was no way that they could have survived that.
Vi was incredibly proud when Jinx showed up in the balloon. There were so many things that she wanted to say, wanted to let her know, and for a second, Vi hoped that Jinx knew that she loved her. For the past few weeks, trying to fix Vander, seeing her in the cells, all those times where they could have butted heads and ended it all, Vi felt that Jinx knew that it was worth every second… that she was worth it. She wanted to tell her all about how good Caitlyn is, how she’s not the person she thinks she is and that she needed Jinx in her life, just as much as she needed Caitlyn.
Vi couldn’t bear it, so she closed her eyes and let her body take control.
Finally her body stopped shaking and sobbing and she opened her eyes. Vi had no clue whether it had been seconds, minutes or hours since the fight ended. Everything was coming to a blur as reality started to really hit home about what was happening. Vi stared at the harsh metal above her, a lingering blue smoke floating in the air and suddenly she was feeling violently aware that she was dangling perilously right above a 100 meter drop. Vi forgot that she almost fell off this due to the weight of Vander and herself and decided it would be best to start making her way out of here and to… Caitlyn.
Caitlyn.
Vi didn’t even want to think about what would happen if she were to find out something had happened to her. She was aching horribly from the loss of Vander and Jinx, but if something happened to Caitlyn too? Vi wasn’t sure she’d survive this. It was all too much.
Even though her body ached, felt a couple of broken bones in various parts of her body and the crushing thought of how she just lost Jinx, she needed to get to Caitlyn.
Vi pulled herself out of the Hexgate, each movement sending pain shooting through her battered body and everything screamed at her to stop, to just lie down, to give up. But, if VI had one thing left that was worth it, it was Caitlyn, so she followed the distant commotion, and moved slowly, her path marked by scattered debris and muffled shouts. As she walked through, she saw the effects of the arcane. The webbed colours of… Vi didn’t even know what to call it, the same stuff that she saw when Jayce tried to kill Viktor and she was violently aware of how her mind was taken over not too long ago and if that was a product of it, she was not a fan.
However, she pushed through, gripping her side as she felt the cut was reopening and saw the commotion of Enforcers and the healers making their way to one point in the square. Vi’s hands started to shake, she had a terrible gut feeling since she couldn’t see Cait. There were hundreds of Enforcers dead, people from the undercity lying motionless across the ground and Vi started to panic. Where was she?
Vi’s eyes searched the square some more, there were Noxian flags sprayed across the ground, bodies everywhere and just blood… so much blood. The Noxian ships definitely did a number to the buildings, with rubble and debris everywhere. Vi started to think of different scenarios of what the hell happened down here.
Vi’s mind went to the worst part of it, conjuring up images of a cold, lifeless Caitlyn started to appear and she did her best to snap out of it, to suppress it. It was a crippling thought, and something that plagued her during the fight as well. Vi never doubted Caitlyn's abilities, her quick feet, her sharpshooter skills, but she also didn’t doubt Ambessa. As Vi fought in that fight, she was painfully aware that Caitlyn was doing the same, which horrified her.
Vi spotted her dismantled Sniper on the ground, Maddie dead behind it and as she continued to look around she caught eyes with Mel who was on the ground, cradling Ambessa who seemed to not be moving.
Vi ran to her then, falling to her knees beside them and rested her hand on Mels shoulder, her eyes almost pleading with Mels - asking a question she didn’t want to say out loud. Please, please, Vi pleaded in her head. She didn’t want to see Caitlyn cold and lifeless. Vi saw a pool of blood, her eyes fixated it before she heard Mel’s intake of breath before she spoke.
“They took her to the Healer tents, she’s in bad shape, but they think she’ll be okay.” Mel said quietly, almost absentmindedly as Ambessa lay motionless in her arms. Tears stained her cheeks, and Vi wanted to do more for her, but at the same time felt she wanted to be alone with her mother.
“I’m sorry.” Vi choked out, also feeling a huge wave of relief from being told that, but she had to see Caitlyn to make those horrid thoughts leave her.
As Vi walked towards the Healer tents, there were too many people to count, the tents were overflowing with the injured and Vi searched every single face to see if she could see Caitlyn. The Commander would probably get their own tent, right? There were people from the lanes, people from Piltover, bruised, bloodied and the screams… the screaming she heard was gut wrenching. As she looked over some more, filling the square were bodies covered in sheets, all in perfect lines. Vi almost wanted to throw up.
Then she saw Steb, one of Caitlyn’s right hand men and knowing him, he wouldn’t have left her side. Vi headed towards him and there she was, lying unconscious as healers and doctors leant over her, talking too quickly for Vi’s now post adrenaline rush brain was able to make out what they were saying. Caitlyn's arm was by her side, dangling off the bed as she saw the blood stained in her clothes. Vi had to swallow the sob that was about to come out of her. Caitlyn must have been in so much pain.
Vi felt Stebs hand on her shoulder and guided her outside, giving her shoulder a small squeeze before straightening up. His normally quite aqua green face was unusually pale, and Vi felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.
“She sustained a stab wound to her side, and to her eye, which they are worried she will lose. She’s lost a bit of blood, but they’re confident that she’ll make a recovery.” Steb said confidently, giving the queasy feeling in Vi’s stomach a bit of ease.
”Which one?” Vi wasn’t able to get a good look at her due to how many people were working on her. Even now as she tried to look into the tent, the doctors were crowding her body. They looked to be wrapping bandages around multiple parts of her body.
“Her left.” Vi nodded, knowing that the eye Cait used to snipe with was her right and losing that ability would have been devastating to her. Vi went back into the tent as some of the doctors started to disperse and found a box, using it as a seat as she sat beside her bed.
Vi picked up her hand, cradling it in both of hers as she looked her over. She had bandages wrapped around her stomach, and one around her eye. They looked clear, no blood. A good sign. Vi watched her chest then, carefully seeing as it rose in and lowered in a steady rhythm. Her uniform was covered in blood and her hair was out of the ponytail, flowing down her side. Caitlyn was okay. She was fine.
Vi felt a wash of relief flow over her before her body started to relax and with it, she rested her head on the bed beside her hand and closed her eyes.
Caitlyn woke up with a start. She was having a nightmare… the sound of Maddie’s gun going off behind her replaying through her mind.
A horrid stabbing feeling started filling her eye, and she felt this heaviness on her hand that she hadn’t felt before. She opened her eye, the urge to open the other filled her but the pain was too much to even think about and after a few moments of bluriness, the weight on her hand she realised was Vi’s head.
Relief flooded Caitlyn, deeper than she’d ever felt before. Maybe she had, when she saw her after so long in those hidden rock alleyways or when she finally arose after being badly injured from the Noxian fight, however, her angry oil slick was fine, asleep, and from what she could see, not injured. Cait lifted her hand from underneath Vi’s head and stroked Vi’s hair softly, which in turn caused Vi to flinch before her eyes opened.
Cait forgot that Vi had been through so much these past few months. That those soft touches, those small moments they had previously were something that she hopefully would get used to again. As Vi’s striking soft blue eyes met hers, she saw that smile that she’d been longing to see.
“Hi, Cupcake.” Cait couldn’t help but laugh, but groaned as she felt the stitches in her side tug, causing an involuntary wince to leave her lips. “Sorry.” She felt Vi mutter but Caitlyn just shook her head, moving her hand which was clutched in Vi’s to her cheek.
”You’re okay.” Cait breathed out, running her thumb over her cheek as Vi nodded and turned her face to kiss her palm. Caitlyn sighed, feeling relief that Vi was accepting her touch. Ever since that moment in the cell, Caitlyn wanted nothing to be right by her side and touch her, breathe her in, feel her warmth. She was worried that moment would be their last, and even if it was, Caitlyn was okay with that. That was the last thing she thought of when Maddie pulled the trigger.
“I couldn’t find you.” Vi breathed out and Caitlyn watched as her eyes lowered to focus on their hands intertwined together. “I lost Jinx and Vander… I can’t lose you too.”
Caitlyn felt her heart drop. The bond that those two shared, she envied. Caitlyn never had someone as close to her as her parents, maybe Jayce, but what Jinx and Vi had was like they were two people who were so carefully intertwined and couldn’t see each other living without.
Caitlyn moved her hand to tilt Vi’s chin up so she could look at her. Vi’s eyes were swelling with tears, the usually quite abrasive, tough exterior that she portrayed was cracking and Caitlyn couldn’t help but feel her own tears start to swell.
”I’m so sorry, Violet.” Caitlyn murmured before rubbing a tear away when it fell down Vi’s cheek with her thumb. She then sat up slightly, ignoring the pain in her side and pulled her close. Vi pressed her face into her neck and sobbed. Caitlyn wrapped her arm around her shoulders, holding her tightly against her as she sighed, feeling Vi’s wet tears on her neck. Cait rested her chin on the top of her Vi’s head, stroking her hair gently as she held her, feeling how her body shook against hers and closed her eyes.
Caitlyn wasn’t sure when she fell asleep, but suddenly she realised she was in her own bed, the Healer tent a distant memory. The sharp pain was gone, replaced by a dull ache in her side and an empty void where her eye should be. The bed moved slightly and she looked over, smiling slightly at the sight. Vi was curled up into her side, almost in a ball and dressed in a singlet and her underwear, bandages peeking out from under her top. Her arm was bandaged up to her shoulders and Caitlyn let out a sigh. So she was hurt. Idiot.
Caitlyn leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to her temple before sliding out of bed, feeling a little bit wobbly as she stood and realised how off balance she felt with only having one eye. She was so used to being able to see multiple angles and things, but instead was met with just one line of sight. Caitlyn carefully grabbed the robe and draped it over her, moving over to her window. As she stared out, she was reminded of the moment where they tried to sneak in. It felt… almost years ago, those moments. It was a different world back then. Caitlyn didn’t have to worry about much… just her job as an officer, Silco and her mother.
Moments like these did make her miss her mother. Caitlyn wondered if she would be proud of what she had done, whether it was something she would have done.
Caitlyn heard a small groan and turned, watching as Vi stretched out before locking eyes with hers. Those powder blue eyes, Caitlyn could look into them forever. From the first day she saw them, till the last time she thought she thought she would see them, Cait really wanted nothing else.
Cait could see the sadness behind them though. Vi smiled but Cait could see how it didn’t reach her eyes and Cait moved to her, sitting down on the bed as she ran her fingers over her cheek. Her fingers lingered on her VI tattoo. A memory she remembered from the first time they laid on this bed together. God, it was so simple back then.
“How are you feeling?” Vi mumbled, her throat coming out hoarse and thick with sleep. Cait watched as Vi struggled to keep her eyes open and she couldn’t help but smile. She moved her fingers to her hair, smiling gently as her pink shone through more now that the grease or whatever Vi had put in her hair had almost washed out.
“I’m okay, go back to sleep Vi.” She watched as Vi’s eyes closed as she shook her head. Stubborn. Classic Vi.
“But… this dream will… stop.” Vi mumbled and Cait lowered herself, instantly wrapping her arm around Vi as she tucked Vi into her - creating a small ball. Caitlyn’s smile dropped almost immediately, knowing that Vi wasn’t saying it as a joke. She had lost the people closest to her, Caitlyn couldn’t imagine what her head would be like right now.
“It’s not a dream, Vi. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
Vi woke suddenly, her dream of seeing Jinx fall starting her awake and looked up to see Caitlyn getting dressed. She looked different. There was something about her… she seemed different. A good different though. Caitlyn felt more confident, comfortable and just… open. Vi had always felt Caitlyn was acting, trying too hard to be what others expected. But now, she seemed freer, more like herself, and Vi couldn’t look away.
Vi hadn’t been herself, well, maybe she was truly getting back to who she was these past few days. She let herself grieve, sob, pour her heart into Caitlyn who did nothing but be there for her. Stroke her hair, whisper sweet words that made her feel loved and alive, while she curled up in her bed. She felt guilty, but at the same time, she knew that after everything Jinx would want her to be happy.
Caitlyn turned and Vi could see her properly now as the light bounced off of her from the windows. Dressed in some long black pants, a soft black long sleeved turtleneck and now had a dark blue eye patch instead of the bandage she had been wearing. Vi almost forgot to breathe when Caitlyn's eyes locked with hers. She couldn’t believe that they were here, alive and in this moment. That Vi couldn’t believe that someone as beautiful as Caitlyn, wanted her.
Vi sat up slowly, still feeling a dull throb from her mended arm and watched as Cait sat on the bed, letting her take her hand. Vi couldn’t deny that she enjoyed the amount of touch that Caitlyn was giving her.
When they were doing those missions in the under-city with the other Enforcers, she felt Caitlyn was always on edge. Always making sure she was keeping this tough, forced exterior of an officer. Vi guessed being the Commander without Ambessa’s influence now meant she could do whatever she wanted, with whoever she wanted.
“I’m going to go have a walk around with the other Enforcers… try and understand what’s needed next.” Vi nodded slowly, having a feeling Caitlyn was sticking away from talking about the Hexgate. “Did you want to come with?” Vi shook her head, she didn’t feel a need to be out there right now and really didn’t want to come face to face with what happened quite just yet.
Vi watched as Caitlyn nodded, before reaching up to rest her hand on her cheek when she leant down to kiss her softly. Vi couldn’t help but smile, it was the first kiss since that moment in the cells and it was probably the first one that didn’t feel rushed, desperate. It was just soft. A goodbye kiss, with a promise to return.
“I’ll see you soon.” Caitlyn said with a smile, Vi, almost blurted something out before nodding.
“I’ll see you soon.” She said back, watching as Caitlyn slid off the bed and shrugged on her Commander jacket, walking out of the room.
Caitlyn walked the streets with Mel, Shoola and Sevika, who had suddenly become someone of great importance. Caitlyn wanted someone like Sevika to share the actual truth of what was happening in the lanes. Sure, she might have been one of Silcos enforcers, but Caitlyn had to put her prejudices aside and start fresh, otherwise they were going to be back where they were not too long ago. Caitlyn could sense the distrust within Sevika however, but knew with enough trust being built between them, there could be a brighter tomorrow for a lot of people.
They had made their way through the main parts of the city before ending up where Caitlyn had wanted to see the most. Guarding the entrance were two enforcers who, on their arrival, stepped aside.
“No ones been inside, ma’am.” One of them stated, a younger soldier Cait had never met before. He didn’t look much older than 16 and Caitlyn was just grateful he was standing before them, alive. Cait thanked him, before stepping inside the Hexgate with the others.
There was debris everywhere. Metal, arcane, dried blood and… something. Cait walked towards a familiar object, bending down in the middle and picked it up. It was the head of one of Jinx’s bombs. She recognised the markings immediately.
“Look familiar?” Caitlyn turned to Sevika who was staring at the object in her hand, nodding. Caitlyn handed it over to her, watching as Sevika analysed it. She pushed her bangs back as she held it higher to the sun, nodding slowly as she turned it around.
“This was definitely one of hers.” Caitlyn almost wanted to laugh, remembering how she said the exact same thing not too long ago, only later to learn that it wasn’t Jinx herself. Caitlyn saw Mel wander off in the distance, knowing that this was the place where Jayce was last seen. Sevika handed Caitlyn back the monkey head, before continuing to walk around the room. Caitlyn watched as she and Shoola spoke to each other quietly before turning and looking at the rune markings along the wall.
Jayce had explained the runes to Caitlyn once, she wasn't really listening at the time, but seeing this just made her realise how dearly she missed Jayce. Caitlyn almost wanted to let out a sob at the thought of him. He went into the Hexgate to stop this, to stop Viktor, and he hasn't been seen since. Whilst Vi was sleeping, Caitlyn read a report compiled by one of her Lieutenants which was also done in conjunction with Sevika. They listed down every person that was at the fight who was found to be dead or could not be located. It spanned four pages and it had Jayce at the top of the list of missing.
The last known whereabouts for him were right in this room, even being seen on the top of the roof. Other than that, no one knows. Caitlyn felt like she lost so many people during this, which makes her think, was it worth the cost?
“Commander.” Sevika called out and Caitlyn looked over to see Sevika bent down beside Vi’s gauntlets. As Caitlyn approached them, she realised they weren’t damaged at all. They were missing their hextech though, and Caitlyn wondered why Vi hadn’t taken them with her. Was this just… she didn’t have the strength to bring them with her or… was this her giving them up?
“I want to do something.” Caitlyn murmured, looking at the gauntlets before looking up at Sevika, unsure if she would be open to the idea. However, considering she was a prolific and basically a figurehead to Zaun, Caitlyn wanted to make sure any ideas that had any involvement with Zaun went through someone who actually lived there. “A memorial.”
Caitlyn thought suddenly about her mothers own memorial then with the council members. How ruined it was, the fight that broke out over it, Vi saving her.
“Piltover and Zaun, connected.” Caitlyn continued, sliding her hands into the pockets of her Commander jacket. Shoola walked over to them slowly, nodding. “We fought this enemy together, we should grieve together, show up for each other.”
“It’s time for change.” Mel, who had been extremely quiet this whole time, said from across the room. The golden accents on her skin shone brightly against the light that was streaming in from the exposed roof.
“It’s time to unite the cities.” Shoola murmured, running a hand over her neck as she adjusted the collar of her top. The gold of her eyepiece that she received after the attack on the councillor's shone just as bright as Mel’s golden accents.
“We need to honour our dead, together.” Caitlyn said and all of them nodded in agreement. She saw Shoola turn to Sevika, pressing her hands together.
“The bridge. Let's unite there.” Shoola said quietly to Sevika, who nodded. Caitlyn thought it was a fantastic idea, using the place that “divided” them as a place to unite the two.
“It would be good if Vi was there,” Mel murmured quietly. Caitlyn tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and sighed.
“No one’s seen her since…” Mel trailed off as Caitlyn caught her tracing her fingers over some of the rune inscriptions. She knew how much Jayce meant to her, Caitlyn knew how guilty she felt about all of this as well.
“I know.” Caitlyn’s voice was soft, almost a whisper. Gods, did she know. “She… I’ll try.” The words felt heavy as she forced herself to meet Mel’s gaze. Then, she turned to Sevika and Shoola. “Let’s make it happen, tonight. We need to start to heal, and I think that’s a good starting point.”
As she walked away, Caitlyn’s thoughts spiraled. She didn’t want to bring it up to Vi—not yet. Well, she did… but she didn’t. The contradiction gnawed at her. Caitlyn understood pain all too well after her mother’s death and she didn’t deal with it well, instead she’d buried herself in duty, in control. She’d tried to outrun the weight of it and failed spectacularly. But Vi? Vi had lost so much more.
Caitlyn stopped and stared at the ground, her chest tightening. How do you help someone who’s lost… everything? She didn’t know. And that terrified her most of all.
Both of them nodded before Caitlyn turned and walked out of the tower.
Usually she would be met with a busy street, Enforcers walking along, families and friends filling the place, but now it was met with rubble, the lingering smell of smoke and the blood still staining the floors.
Caitlyn gazed over at the square where they fought Ambessa, her fingers involuntarily curling into fists at her sides. For a moment, her breath hitched and flashes of the moment Maddie pulling the trigger filled her mind and she flinched, her body shuddering as the sound of the gunshot rang in her ears. She almost gasped aloud, not realising that she had been holding her breath and struggled to focus back on the present in front of her. Caitlyn didn’t really realise how close she was to death.
Now the square was just filled with Noxian soldiers preparing to leave on their boats and Caitlyn watched as Mel went to them. That was her army now. They respected the taking over of the crown, and Caitlyn was just hopeful that this would be the start of peacetime.
After Caitlyn spent some time getting statements from other Enforcers regarding the fight that happened in the Hexgate, Caitlyn was at a loss as to how Vi’s gauntlets and the Monkey head had survived. If the explosion was big enough, it would have blown everything in that place, possibly even Vi with it.
Caitlyn turned the monkey piece over in her hands as she walked back to the Kirramman estate.The streets were quieter than usual, with only a few people walking around that glanced her way. Some of them did stop and stare, usually faces filled with curiosity or gratitude, but others just kept walking. Some looked utterly filled with despair, some were just trying to get by. This… war, dealt it’s toll on a lot of people.
As Caitlyn arrived at the estate, she paused outside the main gate. It was this loomy grand mansion, which honestly embarrassed Caitlyn now. It was too big, far too big, meant for a family of maybe five or ten. But now it only housed her and her father. That is, if Vi ever wanted to call it home, but Caitlyn doubted that. It probably was just another reminder how different worlds they came from.
As Caitlyn stepped inside, she paused to listen. Her father wasn’t anywhere to be seen and so she decided to head towards the office and hung her jacket up. There was something she wanted to check before she spoke to Vi about the memorial tonight.
She sat down at the computer and entered her Kirramman access key, her face being illuminated by the brightness of the screen and she let out a sigh, pulling up the schematics of the Hexgate Tower and flipped through.
Vi stared at the ceiling of Caitlyn's bed, realising that it wasn’t just a bland grey, but had little hints of green within it. She was painfully aware that she hadn’t left the bed in days, but she really didn’t see a reason to leave it. The only thing that Vi had now was Caitlyn, and what use was there for the outside world? Caitlyn had responsibilities, a city depended on her and they needed her strength and guidance. But Vi? No one relied on her anymore.
She could hear Caitlyn's voice in the back of her mind. The undercity needs you, Zaun needs you, they need a leader now. Vi rolled onto her side, pushing those thoughts out of her mind and looked out, her gaze settling on the faint impression that Caitlyn left on the mattress. That was when Vi realised… this was her life now.
She ran a hand over the small dip in the bed where Caitlyn had been lying, her fingers tracing its gentle grooves and she couldn’t help but smile. Caitlyn would be back soon, settling into that same spot, bringing with her a quiet reassurance. Caitlyn was alive, they were together and for now, that was enough.
But as Vi rolled onto her back, staring up at the ceiling again, a familiar restlessness itched at her brain. Was this it? Did she really want to spend the rest of her life lying here? No, not really. She never could stay still for long.
Once, she was always moving, whether it be fighting, fixing, doing something that felt important. Even when she’d spiraled into drinking or brawling, there’d always been a reason to keep going. A purpose, even if it wasn’t a good one. Plus, if Jinx or Vander saw her like this, they’d grab her and haul them out of it themselves, telling her that she’s wasting this chance she’s been given.
And with that, Vi rolled out of bed. As her feet hit the polished tile floor and she stood, her body let out a dull ache. Her wounds and bruises were healing nicely, but she felt stiff from how long she had been perched up in that bed. Vi grabbed her pants off the chair by the bed and slid them on before moving out into the small room that housed a fireplace and a small bar. Vi suddenly remembered that this was the room where she went off at Caitlyn for throwing Jinx in the basement, not that she really gave her the benefit of the doubt first regarding it. Vi trusted Caitlyn a lot more after that day, especially after what happened in the cells.
As her mind drifted to that glorious memory, she let her eyes wander to the bar and found herself picking up a large glass container, popping the lid and smelled the contents. Ignoring the fact that the liquor probably belonged to Caitlyn’s parents, she poured herself a generous glass. Vi’s relationship with alcohol certainly wasn’t the best, but she figured after the past few days that she’d had, she could do with a sip.
Vi perched herself on the table, tucking one of her knees to her chest as she rested her arm on it and looked into the fire. So many things were running through her mind. The fight. Jinx. Vander. This place. Caitlyn. For the first time ever, it suddenly dwelled on Vi that this was the turning point in her life. Her fingers tightened around the glass, as she felt a small bubble of anxiety start in the pit of her stomach. It was her choice what she wanted to do next… she could keep fighting, or she could finally rest. Choose a simpler, peaceful route. Vi had no clue what that would be however. She felt that she had been fighting all her life, she couldn’t even remember what peace even was like.
But then just faintly, she remembered.
It was a song her mother used to hum. Vi had no idea where it came from, like a… lost memory that maybe she tried to repress or just simply forget because it was too painful to remember, but now, it suddenly made her feel at ease.
So she started to hum it. Vi couldn’t even remember the song, but she could remember her mum humming it at the Last Drop. It was always with a smile plastered on her face and usually ended with Vi’s mother planting a kiss on either her or Jinx’s foreheads, whoever was closest.
Vi heard the footsteps then, and she almost smiled, already knowing it was Caitlyn. There was just something so grounding about her presence, something that soothed the ache in her chest.
“Is that… singing?” Caitlyn’s voice had a soft playful tone to it and Vi couldn’t help but hear the smile in her voice. Vi also smiled when Caitlyn said down beside her, giving Vi a gentle nudge.
“It’s just a tune my mother used to hum.” Vi murmured gently, glancing at Caitlyn for a small moment before looking back at the fire. Caitlyn adjusted beside her, settling in close. Vi felt her rest her head on her shoulder, and the weight felt reassuring, grounding.
“Are you still in this fight… Violet?” Vi hesitated for a moment, knowing the meaning behind Cait’s words. Vi couldn’t deny that she had been struggling the past few days with it. They were filled with grief and guilt, and knowing that her family was ripped away from her, that that internal struggle was something she wasn’t sure she could
“I am the dirt under your nails, Cupcake. Nothings going to clean me out.”
Vi felt Caitlyn's body sink into hers even more and she couldn't help but feel… happy. How could she though? Her family was dead. How could she feel good about any of this at all?
“I need you to come with me tonight.” She heard Caitlyn breathe out, as if she had been holding the breath for years and Vi felt Caitlyn's arm snake around her back, rubbing her side. “There's going to be a memorial.”
Vi hesitated. She really didn't know what to say. A small part of her wanted to run away, to not acknowledge any of it, but she also knew at some point she had to face it. Had to really come to terms with what had happened and make her peace with it.
“I’m struggling, Vi. I know you are too, but together… we can get through this.” Vi lifted her head to look up at her, watching as Caitlyn’s usual stoic facade started to waver. Caitlyn's eyes flicked to hers and Vi caught her lip trembling.
“I can't sleep.” Caitlyn’s voice came out as a sob, Vi sat up straighter and gripped her hand, holding it tightly. “All I see is death, all I hear is Maddie's gun going off… I see you, dead.” Vi instantly wrapped both her arms around her, hugging her tightly as she felt Caitlyn sob into her shoulder.
Vi knew Caitlyn was struggling, but she rarely had she ever opened up about it to her. They were both like that. Still learning how to be together, how to communicate, how to trust someone else and how to… love one another. Even when Caitlyn's mother died, she was closed off, barely had time to grieve and forced into a role where she wasn't emotionally ready for.
“We’ll get through this together.”