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The coffin drops 1,000 feet beneath the house. Guillermo panics that this is really it, Nandor is finally going to accidentally kill him, the impact is going to squish his little human body into a pancake–when the coffin stops abruptly, three feet above a dirt floor. There’s a little whiplash, but he’s mostly insulated by the fur that lines Nandor’s coffin. Nandor gestures proudly at what appears to be a very dark, very spare dirt cave. It’s so much darker than he’s used to; he’s been followed by a film crew with lights hot enough to burn hair for six years. His eyes struggle to adjust.
“Welcome, Guillermo, to our underground lair.”
Guillermo sits for a minute as his vision settles in the low light. There are lit candles lining the circular space surrounding them. Otherwise, it appears to be nothing more than a deep, damp hole. The cave looks barely big enough for the coffin and gears, let alone an entire crime-fighting apparatus. Figures. Nandor probably expects him to build it.
Nandor takes in Guillermo’s expression, illuminated by the close candlelight, and clears his throat. “Well, obviously, it still needs a little bit of work,” he says, not meeting Guillermo’s eyes. “But soon it will be the seat of our crime-fighting empire.”
Guillermo nods. “Okay,” he says, and shifts closer to Nandor in the coffin until their legs are touching slightly.
“Guillermo,” Nandor says warningly. “You are spreading to my side of the coffin.”
“I am,” Guillermo agrees.
“What is the meaning of this?” Nandor’s face has its usual hauteur, but Guillermo senses a slight nervousness around the edges. Good. The element of surprise is on his side. He reaches out a hand and rests his fingers on top of Nandor’s where they’re pillowed in the fur blankets.
“You built this lair for us to fight crime?” Guillermo asks, letting his fingers stroke up Nandor’s wrist.
“What are you doing?” Nandor snaps, not moving his hand.
“You know what I’m doing,” Guillermo says under his breath, scooting closer.
“Yes, I built the lair for us to fight crime,” Nandor says, though he sounds unsure now. Isn’t that why he made this room? This room, which is soundproof, filled with candles, and far away from the cameras and their housemates.
“You know, we don’t have to fight crime down here,” Guillermo says, leaning closer. “I mean, that’s not the only thing I can think to do in a place like this.”
“Guillermo, what are you–”
Guillermo kisses Nandor gently on the mouth. Nandor doesn’t react at first. Guillermo’s hands grip his forearms, then come up to hold his face. He runs his tongue gently across the vampire’s lips. He tastes coppery and perfect. Then Guillermo pulls back, eyes a little wide with his own daring.
“That’s what I wanted to do away from the crew,” he says, mouth quirking up slightly, a little self-satisfied that he’d finally done it. Nandor stares at him, brow furrowed. “And I thought, maybe, you wanted—“
“You thought I would want this from you?” Nandor growls. “If I wanted you, Guillermo, I would have had you.” His gaze hardens into a glare. Guillermo feels his human heart beat harder, responding to the predatorial energy radiating from Nandor the Relentless, who looks ready to rage.
“Right,” Guillermo falters. “Of c-course—I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“You were thinking that I am a very attractive, very sexually ravenous vampire,” Nandor says, looming over Guillermo until he’s practically laying back on the soft furs. He drags his hips across Guillermo’s, who tries to stifle a shudder. “You were thinking you are a strong warrior who is no longer afraid of his master.”
“Y-yes,” Guillermo whispers hoarsely. “I’m not afraid of you.”
Nandor hisses, then pushes him backwards and back into a kiss, harder this time, showing him how a real vampire does things. He bites Guillermo’s lower lip and draws blood, and Guillermo moans.
“I knew you wanted this,” he gasps, hands going to the belt that fastens Nandor’s tunic. Nandor catches his hands and pushes them away, then pulls off his belt and top himself. “You don’t know what you need, sometimes, but I do.” Guillermo runs his hands greedily over the exposed planes of Nandor’s chest, brindled with thick, soft hair. He’s seen him naked before, but he’s never been allowed to touch him like this. He’s been servile, he’s been brusque, and at times, he’s even been worshipful, but he’s never shown his appreciation for Nandor’s body as baldly as he does now.
Nandor can smell how excited Guillermo is, and it makes him feral; he pounces on the other man’s neck and sucks along his beautiful neck until he finds a vibrating pulse point.
“Do you want me to bite you?” Nandor growls; they both know he won’t.
“You can try,” Guillermo pants, a light warning in his tone. Nandor’s fangs graze the pulsating vein beneath Guillermo’s jaw, but they don’t pierce through. Guillermo shivers. They both know how Nandor feels about sparing his familiar’s humanity. They both know Guillermo would have a stake at his chest in an instant, without a moment’s thought. Nandor presses down with his lips, and sucks the blood to the surface until the pretty brown skin bruises.
Guillermo squirms with pleasure, and Nandor wants to rip his sweater vest off with his teeth. He settles for pulling the damn thing apart with his bare hands, buttons popping off everywhere, then does the same thing with Guillermo’s white undershirt. Both garments are in tatters, but Guillermo barely has time to scold him before he’s nearly insensible, incoherent with the sensation of Nandor licking down his chest.
“Oh, my god,” Guillermo moans, before he can catch himself. Nandor hisses at the word, but doesn’t stop laving Guillermo’s nipples with true artistry. It feels for a moment like he really cares; it feels like affection. Guillermo tries to keep his own eyes open to watch Nandor suck and kiss his way down his body, but the visual stimulation is too overwhelming; he shuts his eyes again, stroking Nandor’s hair and writhing up against him for the friction of it.
“Do you want me to fuck you, Guillermo?” Nandor teases, pressing a hand between them to squeeze their lengths together. “Is that what you’ve been wanting? At night in your little shed?”
Guillermo can barely stand to listen to the gravelly tones of Nandor’s voice, pitched low and seductive as he strokes them both in his large hand. “No, Master,” he breathes, reaching around and skimming his own hand up Nandor’s shaking thighs. He presses his middle finger down between the cleft of Nandor’s perfect ass cheeks as Nandor’s strokes pick up speed. The vampire growls, a truly animalistic noise, beyond human.
“This is what you want,” Guillermo says, nodding to himself as Nandor bears down on the intrusion. “And I need to give you what you want.”
“You are very, very naughty,” Nandor scolds, barely suppressing a moan as he thrusts back on Guillermo’s fingers. “I have put many soldiers to death for this kind of cheek.”
“Mhm,” Guillermo hums, retracting his hand and bullying Nandor over onto his hands and knees. “Just let me take care of this for you, Master.”
Guillermo has only done this a handful of times, mostly with Freddie, which hurts a little to think about. He was on the other side of things, but he’s a quick study. He spreads Nandor’s cheeks apart, then kisses the tight little knot of muscle at the center. It’s clean, furred like the rest of him, and it tastes delicious. Dark, metallic, a little like the rose water soap Guillermo buys from the Iranian grocery store for him. He thrusts his tongue inside, exploratory, and Nandor keens into the fur of the coffin. Guillermo stops.
“What was that? Did you say something?”
“No,” Nandor grits out. “You may continue.”
“Oh,” Guillermo slicks his fingers and presses two firmly inside. “I thought maybe you wanted me to stop.” He presses down until he finds the spot he’s looking for, then stops, resting his fingertips just there.
Nandor thrusts back, trying to get more of the sensation. “What are you doing back there, Guillermo?” He demands. “Do you want me to tell you what to do?”
In response, Guillermo moves his hand in an approximation of what’s to come, and Nandor meets his thrusts beat for beat. He’s clearly experienced; Guillermo knew that. He had wanted this to be different; he had wanted to be seduced. But Nandor is a little thick at the best of times, and if he were to suddenly decide to leave tomorrow at dawn… well, there’s nothing left to lose. There are no cameras anymore. The housemates are hundreds of feet above them, and no one is here to listen or mock him for taking what he wants.
He sinks into Nandor’s body with a heady mixture of relief, of something a long time coming. Sixteen years of frustrated desire. It’s perfect: tight and slick and thrumming with shared electricity. Guillermo thinks his heart is beating hard enough for the both of them. He’s gratified by the harsh gasp of appreciation Nandor makes—“Guillermo! I did not know you had it in you”—and by the feeling of Nandor’s inhumanly cool, welcoming body.
Guillermo is radiating enough heat for the both of them down here in this chilly, candlelit cave, and Nandor is an enthusiastic partner, as Guillermo always imagined he’d be. “Yes,” he encourages, taking Guillermo deeper and pushing back harder against him. “That is good, Guillermo, you are very strong for a puny human.”
The dirty talk could use a little work, but Guillermo is turned on just by hearing the accented words from his master, knowing this is real, it’s not for anyone but them, that Nandor the Relentless is cursing and bucking back beneath him. It could be no one else, he thinks wildly, feverishly; there’s never been another person he wanted so badly to do this for. A part of him would give up his humanity to be by Nandor’s side for eternity, he thinks, but he loves that Nandor wouldn't turn him. He loves him the way he is. Guillermo knows that's the only way Nandor will ever tell him he cares. If tonight is all he gets, his entire life would have been worthwhile. This is where he is supposed to be.
Nandor reaches up and behind him to bring his hips even closer, and the rhythm picks up. Guillermo realizes Nandor isn’t even touching himself; his massive cock is dragging on the fur beneath them, leaving a wet trail glistening in the candlelight. “Does that feel good?” Guillermo says, punctuating his words with harder thrusts. Nandor’s cock is leaking everywhere, he likes it rough, and Guillermo can’t stop himself. He reaches down to feel the thick length heavy in his palm, and Nandor’s moan of pleasure ricochets back through him.
“Yes, you are so good, my Guillermo,” Nandor purrs. “You are so big and strong. No one has ever taken care of me as well as you.” At that, Guillermo feels like he’s being a little condescended to, but it makes his cock swell further. Nandor makes a noise like he can feel the change. Guillermo has always had a bit of a praise kink; they both know this. His, he thinks, noting the possessive. I am his Guillermo.
He pulls at Nandor’s gorgeous cock in time with the deeper thrusts and feels ready to burst apart at the seams; he’s never been this hard in his life. Not when he was jerking himself off in the cupboard under the stairs to fantasies that looked a lot like this; not when he used to get aroused just from dressing and undressing his master in the early days; not even when he and Freddie had stolen the Cloak and role-played a version of this very scenario. “Master—Nandor,” he huffs, barely able to use his voice. “What do you need?” I’m going to come , he thinks, and I want it to be with you.
“Tell me,” Nandor grits out, and Guillermo wishes he could see his beautiful face. Instead, he pulls at his hair a little, and Nandor gasps. I love you? Guillermo thinks, though that can’t be it. He does; Nandor knows he does, but he doesn’t need to say it. It would only make things awkward again, and Guillermo couldn't bear that. Tell him what?
All at once, Nandor tightens around him, and Guillermo knows exactly what he needs to hear to finish. He strokes the head of Nandor’s leaking cock, presses himself against every inch of him, and says, “I’ll never leave you.” Nandor comes with a whimper, spattering the coffin with an absolutely ridiculous amount of vampire semen (Guillermo has a flash of the witches that would pay good money for what he’s getting for free).
"Yes," Nandor moans. "You are mine." Guillermo feels his entire body release in a far more human climax. It’s the hottest moment of his life, coming with Nandor like this; it’s more than he ever dreamed was possible. He stays still for a moment, catching his breath and feeling his cock soften gradually inside the vampire, unwilling to break apart.
“You are very sweaty,” Nandor remarks, and Guillermo takes that as his cue to peel himself off of Nandor’s back with a long-suffering sigh. “Perhaps we should go back up and get a towel for you.”
“Can we stay here for just a minute?” Guillermo asks, breath still coming quickly, heart still pounding. The best sex of his life, and Nandor won’t let them bask in the afterglow.
“It has been a minute,” Nandor says plaintively. “And my coffin is full of semen now. You will have to clean this up, Guillermo.”
“I will,” Guillermo laughs. “Don’t worry. Does this thing even go back up?” He gestures at the pulley contraption they took down in the first place.
“Let us find out,” Nandor says, and pulls the lever.
