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Something that never seized to amaze Kim Dokja both while reading Ways of Survival and going through the scenarios himself was the stark difference between the ordinary life of incarnations. Here he was fighting in the Seoul Dome, all covered in blood, sweat, and dirt, and then the very same day he was having dinner at a welcoming cozy restaurant with a thought-out and clearly very expensive decorum.
Kim Dokja and his party initially went to the location where the restaurant was located, the Grand City of Merchants on planet Enel, because Kim Dokja had once read in TWSA that there was a highly-skillful blacksmith. Conveniently, it played out perfectly for Kim Dokja as the next scenario they were about to face required a special type of weapon to be forged from unique and damn difficult to obtain materials. The Grand City of Merchants was the perfect place to both get those materials and place an order for the weapon to be made.
What he didn't account for, however, was the unstoppable force of nature named “kids”. As their party was walking towards the exit of the city to get to the portal, Shin Yoosung just so happened to spot something no child would be able to pass up on: a whole display worth of all kinds of sweets from different planets! Naturally, it didn't take long for Lee Gilyoung to catch onto this too, and with a swift yet forceful attack of skill Puppy Eyes Lv.100 , even Kim Dokja’s Fourth Wall couldn't help but give in. As such, the soft-hearted and absolutely loaded Kim Dokja suggested they all go there to replenish their energy.
Party members made themselves comfortable on a big leathery couch at the corner of the restaurant. Yoo Joonghyuk, a surprisingly huge softie deep inside, went up to the counter to order some sweets for his little sister, Mia, while Jung Heewon appreciatively hummed to the soft relaxing tunes filling the air. Lee Hyunsung and Lee Jihye grabbed one of the menus on the table and began eyeing up the stakes, passionately discussing the best options on the list. Lee Seolhwa and Yoo Sangah took the second menu, thoughtfully picking out not only their own orders, but also some nutritious options for kids to add to much less filling sugary delights they came for. The kids and Kim Dokja, in turn, were looking through the sweets on the display, Shin Yoosung arguing with Lee Gilyoung about what is superior: dragon-scale caramel cookies or cloud-threads candy.
Eventually, the group finalized their orders and called the waiter over. Yoo Joonghyuk came back right as Han Sooyoung was busy ordering a huge plate of smoked gryphon’s ribs, an extra large bowl of smoothie from rare fruit palmera from planet Obsidian, and a gigantic bee honey comb cookie. Yoo Joonghyuk squeezed in between Kim Dokja and Yoo Sangah and quickly took a look at the menu Yoo Sangah passed over to him. He put the bag of sweets he got for Mia aside and ordered a big dragon flesh stake with a big cup of black coffee to finish. The waiter then went over the order, and confused look settled on his face.
“Em, excuse me, sir in the white coat, aren’t you gonna order anything?” he asked Kim Dokja, making the entire group shift their gazes towards Dokja.
“Huh? Me?” he responded awkwardly, a funny expression appearing on his face. He pondered a bit before responding, “I guess a glass of water wouldn’t be bad.”
The table fell into heavy silence, atmosphere absolutely thunderous as 10 pairs of eyes bore holes in him.
“What?” he questioned clumsily, confusion clear as day.
“Kim Dokja, you are a millioner!!! Can’t you fucking order something for yourself?!??” Han Sooyoung roared, baffled by Dokja’s order.
“I mean, I did order water–” he tried to argue, yet got interrupted instantly.
“Order. I’ll pay” Yoo Joonghyuk said, his voice making Dokja tremble just a bit. His tone was a clear indication of infuriation, and Dokja didn’t like it one bit.
“But I–”
“No. Order properly. ” He cut off, leaving no room to arguing.
“Alright, alright!” Dokja agreed begrudgingly, looking at the menu. “I’ll have… A seaweed soup.”
“No. I said ORDER PROPERLY , you fool.” Joonhyuk interrupted again, his usually emotionless face morphing into anger.
“But I did!” Kim Dokja argued, exasperated by the situation.
“No.” Yoo Joonghyuk bit back, and added, “Pick something that isn’t the cheapest on the list.” The glare he threw Dokja’s way made the entire table experience a strange mix of admiration and fear.
“Ugh, okay… How about a swamp shrimp jello?” Kim Dokja said, and quickly added, “I’m not really all that hungry so that should be alright?”. He was, however, betrayed by a loud growl of his stomach, but his stomach would argue Dokja betrayed it first by not eating anything the whole day. His party threw displeased looks his way, expressing their dissatisfaction with Dokja’s stupidity, and Yoo Joonghyuk was, of course, the one who was the most pissed at this.
“Either you pick something you actually want to eat, or I will be picking it for you. And don’t you dare lie, I have Lie Detection on”.
To that, Kim Dokja sighed exhaustedly, little cheers his crewmates threw Yoo Joonghyuk’s way not helping his predicament.
“Alright, damn it, okay.” he said, yet clearly not entirely comfortable with letting himself do this. “I will have a small portion of Demeter’s grain pasta with leaves from the Sacred Tree of Jumanji Forest.”
“Waiter, make it a big portion.” Han Sooyoung intervened.
“And add a big gold sea dragon stake to it.” Yoo Joonghyuk supported.
“Hey! Guys, it’s way too expensive!” Dokja tried to protest, but his protests fell to deaf ears.
“Master is the one paying, not you, Ahjusshi!” Lee Jihye argued, earning an approving nod from Yoo Joonghyuk.
“What else are you going to order, Kim Dokja?” Joonghyuk asked, his tone clearly indicating Dokja has no choice to not order something else.
“Um, I guess a medium-size cup of hot chocolate? Without marshmallow.” He added, and Lie Detection went off.
“Make it a big hot chocolate with marshmallow”, Yoo Sangah chimed in.
“Double the marshmallow!” supported Jung Heewon.
“Triple!!!!” added Han Sooyoung.
“He will have Rumpelstiltskin’s special heavenly hot cocoa with triple marshmallow. And make sure to use your finest marshmallow.” Yoo Joonghyuk concluded, ignoring Kim Dokja’s baffled face.
“You traitors!!!!–” Kim Dokja cried out powerlessly. “That’s enough, please close the tab now.” he asked the waiter, and was, of course, stopped once again. This time, it was Shin Yoosung and Lee Gilyoung.
“But Ahjusshi, what about a dessert?” And, truth be told, Kim Dokja didn’t know what convinced him to agree to this suggestion more: their pleading eyes or the murderous look Yoo Joonghyuk threw his way.
“Fine, I’ll take one. But I can’t decide on anything.” he tried to slither out of this situation, but was quickly brought back to reality by Lee Hyunsung’s endearing “it’s okay, we will help you choose!”. Fucking damn it.
“How about a Milky Way stardust panacotta?” he suggested.
“I’m lactose intolerant.” Lie .
“Fine, I just don’t want it today”. Truth .
“How about a Bun from Underworld Pomegranate seeds?” Jung Heewon suggested.
“No.” This time it was Yoo Joonghyuk. “I don’t trust this fool not to get tethered to fucking Underworld and die. Again”.
The entire table hummed in agreement.
“Maybe Unicorn Sparks Canes?” Shin Yoosung asked.
“No, hyung, take Flower-Thorns shaped Sea Pearl candy!!” Lee Gilyoung objected.
“I’m sorry but I don’t think my fragile teeth could handle it.” Lie .
“Ugh, fine, I don’t want to get cavities! Did you guys see the dentist bill in Korea?!” Truth .
“Maybe you will have a Time-Temple Cake?” Lee Seolhwa suggested, picking out the worst option: the most expensive item of the menu.
“I don’t want it.” Lie . Ugh fuck!
“And he will have a piece of Time-Temple Cake.” Yoo Joonghyuk finished in a satisfied voice, the party collectively humming in approval. Kim Dokja hated them just a bit more for that.
<Kim Dok ja is a bi g li ar> Fourth Wall concluded.
Oh shut the fuck up . He thought in embarrasment.
***
Needless to say, they didn’t leave until Kim Dokja finished ALL of his food. His friends saw to that, and the commander of the “Feed the Squid” mission (well, that was the title Han Sooyoung used in her own thoughts anyway) was none other than Yoo Joonhyuk who was paying the bill while simultaneously blocking Dokja from trying to take over the payment, his poor mind dying from embarrasment from having someone care for him.
The group only sighed to that.
Looks like we are in for a long way to improving…