Archive of Our Own

“What did you do to offend Choi Soobin?”

Kai looks up from his huge stack of paperwork, blinking rapidly and trying to get rid of the black dots plaguing his vision. Those tiny black words are truly dizzying. 

He should schedule an appointment with the optometrist one of these days and check if his lenses need replacing. Maybe also get a haircut on the way back. Who knows, his overgrown fringe getting in his eyes might also be impeding his vision.

“Good afternoon, Team Lead Choi. I’m sorry, what?”

Beomgyu waves him off, taking a loud obnoxious sip of his coffee. “I told you to do away with the honorifics. We don’t do that here in our team. Also, all three team leads are Chois. I don’t want to be lumped with them all the time.”

Fixing his most polite smile, Kai nods, trying to stifle a laugh at the sour look he’s being cast. The two poor Chois, he guesses.

Being at his first internship after switching industries, following three years of working in the newsroom, has been slightly nerve-wracking. Not only did he have to rush to pick up a plethora of new skills, but he also needed to get used to corporate speak and etiquette – something he hadn’t quite developed while rushing from crime scene to crime scene as an active crime reporter back then. 

He can’t say he’s used to being at the bottom of the food chain either. So frankly, he isn’t sure if his new team lead wanting to be friendly with him is definitely a good thing. After all, it’s only his second week here as their newest marketing intern.

“Right, of course, Beomgyu,” – he cringes inwardly, he’ll get used to it soon, hopefully – “what were you saying?”

“I was saying, what have you done to offend Choi Soobin in just two weeks of being here?”

“Offend… who?”

Kai tilts his head and he tries not to stare at Beomgyu like he’s grown two heads, but it’s hard not to when the other man’s spewing garbage he doesn’t understand.

Meanwhile, Beomgyu rolls his eyes, though the expression on his face is a mixture of amusement and curiosity.

Be cautious of colleagues being nosy and cooking stories, Kai jots mentally in his head.

“Choi Soobin. Team B’s Lead. How did you both cross paths anyway? They handle the customer experience stuff which I don’t think is related to your JD anyway.”

“Ah.” Kai’s confusion has yet to clear up, honestly, and he has no idea what Beomgyu is doing by bringing up random names. “I knew that name was familiar. What do you mean I offended him?”

It sinks in and his confusion gives way to visible panic.

“Wait. I offended him?! How? When?”

Beomgyu’s shit-eating grin falls and he looks genuinely concerned and maybe also just a tad apologetic. Good for him.

“Woah, take it easy. I was just rattling off randomly.”

Spewing garbage, you mean, Kai corrects in his head, though he swallows down a scowl expertly.

“I just noticed him glaring at you when you entered the room for our department meeting earlier today.”

Huh. Kai hadn’t even been looking at anything apart from the shockingly long agenda they’d forwarded him just ten minutes before the meeting.

“Was he doing that? Or rather, is he not usually the same towards any other co-worker at all?” He gnaws at his lower lip. Either he was too blissfully unaware for his own good, or the guys here were just too observant for there to be peace in this damned company.

“Has he been treating you like that?” Beomgyu punctuates his sentence with a gasp, and Kai has a hard time deciphering whether the aghast look on his face is meant to be an exaggerated act.

Scratching his neck, Kai tries to rethink every interaction he’s had with Choi Soobin in his past two weeks here. Well, Soobin wasn’t rude per se, but he could be a little imposing and serious in front of Kai, he guesses, though he doesn’t think it’s particularly outlandish. 

Seniority is unfortunately still a big thing in the industry and Kai doesn’t expect to be treated particularly sweetly by any seniors in such a setting.

 “Like what? Uh I mean he’s… Like any senior around? I don’t think I’ve said anything more than a simple greeting to him…” he trails off, uncertainty seeping into his cadence as he frowns. It’s not exactly any intern’s dream to offend any seniors at their workplace while still freshly new to the company. “Was he upset at me?”

In all honesty, he’s gunning for an official full-time position here, and acing his internship would be imperative for that to happen.

“I mean, uh. Glaring’s subjective,” – sure, Beomgyu, that’s believable – “Well, I mean he’s usually pretty prim and proper? He’s got a reputation for being stoic most of the time. But glaring’s new, I guess. He’s usually at least neutral or impassive, at least with co-workers outside his own team.”

Kai’s face must fall even more dramatically because Beomgyu’s quick to reassure him. “No! I mean, we haven’t had any interns around in a while so maybe he just needs to know you better. He’s shy with strangers so maybe he’s just a teeny bit more stern… Well, probably. Yeah.”

Beomgyu’s flimsy attempt at backtracking doesn’t quite convince Kai, but the other man tries to distract him from it anyway, rounding his table to place a hand on his shoulder.

“Forget everything I said. It’s tea time. There are some cookies in the pantry. Let’s have our good ol’ mid-afternoon sugar rush.” Pressing down on his shoulders, Beomgyu nudges Kai out of his seat.

“Aren’t those cookies Team Lead Choi’s? Yeonjun-ssi’s, I mean.”

God, if Choi Yeonjun caught him snooping around and gobbling down his cookies, that’d be a second Team Lead Choi on his case. Spectacular, really.

Beomgyu doesn’t seem to give a damn about his fear, throwing his hands up in a chortle before swinging an arm around Kai’s neck.

“His team does nothing till an event happens. We are the ones always thinking, always needing the sugar to fuel our uh… thought leadership.” Beomgyu gestures oddly at his head with his free hand and his use of the term ‘thought leadership’ would be a lot funnier to Kai were his stomach not sent lurching when a familiar figure emerges from the pantry.

Beomgyu freezes in his tracks too, which is actually mindblowing considering Soobin’s at the same level of the food chain as he is.

Still, Kai hurries to bow deeply.

“Good aft–”

And then Soobin’s gone with a single curt nod.

His cheeks burn petulantly, the discomfort hard to swallow down, even more so with Beomgyu having bore witness to it all.

And his senior himself seems stupefied, all his previous attempts at assuring Kai he was just messing around about Soobin having some kind of bone to pick with him practically washed down the drain in front of their eyes.

Yet, he still has the gall to wince audibly, making Kai’s embarrassment soar tenfold.

“Man, I guess he really isn’t your biggest fan huh.”

-

Kai’s considerably a chill person. He doesn’t like thinking too much about work after he’s clocked out. That was the reason why he left crime reporting after all. The heaviness of following through ghastly crime after crime became too much to bear when at some point in time, he was simply faced with the cruelties of humankind and the reality that true justice was hardly ever served.

After nightmares and a lethal mixture of guilt and disgust plagued his nights, he made the big decision to start anew in a completely different field. Sure, marketing wasn’t exactly where to head if he wanted a strict 9 to 5, but it beat the emotional stress his previous job gave him by miles. 

So starting from the bottom also entailed him adopting a fresh attitude towards his job – he wasn’t going to take his work home as best as he could, mentally or physically.

But there’s no doubt that Choi Soobin’s attitude earlier had left him slightly rattled, and the sinking feeling in his chest doesn’t quite go away even as he pops his headphones on, trying to drown all his mindless worrying out with some good ol’ 2000s punk rock tunes as he braves the packed train ride home. Still, it’s to no avail. The back of his neck continues to prickle disconcertingly right till he reaches home, punching in his keycode before unlocking the door.

Perhaps, it isn’t all bad though, because he’s greeted with the tantalizingly piquant aroma of mapo tofu the moment he enters.

And it isn’t only the familiar and comforting smell of his favorite takeout dish that serves to ground him. 

It’s also the figure that barrels into him and tackles him into a hug that truly distracts him from all the odd feelings that had been bubbling dangerously under his epidermis for the past few hours.

Being squeezed tightly forces a laugh out of him and he drops his messenger bag on the floor, wrapping his own arms against the other man’s torso.

“Kai-ya,” – he shivers at the warmth fanning his sensitive neck – “I missed you today.”

Somehow, the words seem to trigger something and that momentary minute of bliss disappears all too soon. He tries not to appear too bothered though, letting go of his lover and prompting the man to pull away reluctantly.

And when he looks properly at how his lover’s face has morphed into something more boyish and innocent, the conflicting emotions in his chest struggle to make themselves known.

He ignores them in favor of pinching the other man’s cheek.

“You saw me all day… Team Lead Choi.” It’s mostly meant to be a joke, but it stings a bit, given how the same man had treated him earlier today.

It’s all part of the act. You know he loves you, he repeats to himself in his head.

Soobin scrunches his nose and Kai finds it too adorable not to boop that little button, earning another whine.

“Don’t call me that at home. It reminds me of Yeonjun and Beomgyu. Kinda gross.”

Kai stares at Soobin’s face for a few silent moments and he isn’t surprised when his boyfriend doesn’t seem as if he has more to say. Doesn’t seem as if he has any intention to bring up the episode at their office earlier that day.

Maybe Kai was overthinking. He has to be, especially when he knows where Soobin’s coming from. 

Months ago, when Kai quit his job impulsively after seeing through the grueling 80-day trial of one of the country’s most high-profile murderers, who had eventually been let go with nothing more than a slap on the wrist, Soobin had jokingly told him about an open internship position in his company.

Well, at least to them, it had initially started as a joke when Kai sent out his CV to a whole bunch of companies including Soobin’s. But the moment he actually got shortlisted for an interview, he told Soobin that he wanted to give it a go seriously.

And he did so successfully, much to his own surprise and Soobin’s absolute giddiness.

Despite being from a different team handling a different job scope, neither wanted anyone to think Kai only got the position because of his boyfriend, especially not when Soobin truly had nothing to do with Kai scoring the internship.

Tongues could wag and rumors are lethal, what with Soobin ultimately being from a higher position than him and having been in the company for nearly five years after all. 

So they agreed to keep it all a secret, which wasn’t too difficult considering Soobin had always been a private person at work. 

Okay, perhaps, after today’s episode, Kai might have a foreboding sense that Soobin may be overdoing it a little too much, but he doesn’t rule out the possibility of him simply being too sensitive. After all, they had been together for over seven years now, and being treated coldly by his typically affectionate puppy boyfriend might be too much of a contrast for him to grapple with in a short time.

So, he does what he knows is the best thing he can do in such a situation – he stuffs it down, responding to Soobin’s inquisitive head tilt with a smile of his own.

“Let’s eat, I’m starving.”

It does its trick, and Soobin squeezes his waist one more before pulling him to the dining table.

“Honestly, I’m glad we have different reporting and leaving times. Lets me pick our dinner menu every time,” he laughs mindlessly and the hopelessly romantic side of Kai can’t help but imagine a reality where they could head to work and come back together.

Perhaps, his sleepy lover would nod off on his shoulder during the journey and bump his head every time the train halts to a rough stop. Perhaps, they’d interlace their fingers, swinging their joined hands till they ultimately had to part a couple of streets before arriving at their office.

It’s funny how after seven years of being together, Kai still feels as if he hasn’t yet had his fill of Soobin.

He hates that he feels this way, but any semblance of appetite disappears even further when Soobin speaks again after they’ve settled down.

“So how was work today?”

It’s a typical question – one that they’d always ask each other since the time they had been working completely different jobs. Back then, Kai would listen to Soobin lament about the mundane before they switched roles and Kai would begin to share the grisly details of a case he’s been researching on or following.

Boring days meant better nights for Kai. But eventful days usually ended with Soobin leading Kai to squeeze into their bathtub together – far too small for two grown men – while he ranted listlessly. Soobin would listen, gently washing and then drying him without interrupting him with more than an occasional question or two. Just a subtle reminder that he was always listening. And when Kai finally went quiet, Soobin would hold him till they finally fell asleep.

But now, those days are long gone. 

Kai definitely doesn’t regret quitting the newsroom. But he can’t help feeling antsy as he unwittingly wonders whether the move to the same company as his lover was the right decision. Especially if it has now resulted in such iciness between them for the most part of each work day and the loss of the intimacy they once had when they returned home.

“Kai?”

The rice in his mouth has turned disgustingly soggy and he swallows hard, looking at his lover, whose expression is now marred with concern.

“Hm?”

“Are you okay? You were distracted for a while.”

He forces a smile. “Just savoring the food. It’s delicious. What were you saying?”

Soobin stares back at him with doubt, though he doesn’t press any further. “I asked you how your day went?” An unusual wave of apprehension permeates each word and Kai feels bad for being all up in his head and confusing the other man.

Still, it didn’t feel right for him to question Soobin’s actions at the workplace – not when it was but a few minor awkward interactions between them. And definitely not when Soobin has so much more to lose if anyone finds out about their relationship.

“It was fine,” he reassures. “Beomgyu’s been supportive enough to let me start running some ideas on my own. It’s completely new to me, but he’s been patient, thankfully.”

“Yeah, I can see that.” Soobin’s tone is uncharacteristically clipped and it gets Kai’s attention, prompting him to review every word he’d just said to decipher if he’d mentioned anything the other man wouldn’t be comfortable with.

“What do you mean?”

Shoveling a spoon of tofu into his mouth, Soobin takes a few moments to chew before he finally turns to Kai, fixing him a tight smile.

“I meant, he’s a good Team Lead. Friendly, nice, well-liked by many.”

“Yeah,” Kai mumbles, focusing back on his food. “He’s really sweet. I’m lucky to be under his wing.”

Their conversation dies soon after and Soobin obviously makes an effort to switch topics, talking about a new anime movie coming out in theatres.

The air between them shifts ever so slightly, a hint of awkwardness seeping through the empty pockets. 

Meanwhile, Kai’s left wondering when the last time they had to resort to small talk was.

-

Kai is someone who goes with his gut half of the time and logic for the other. This time, he elects to go with his logic in dealing with the change in dynamics with his boyfriend at work and during their private time.

It all makes sense, really. If Soobin got too friendly with him in the office, it could incite an unnecessary wave of rumors. In that case, his decision to be cold towards Kai can logically be justified. 

Soobin hasn’t explained himself, but as his long-term partner, Kai knows that the man tends to act on muscle memory and get clingy around him. It absolutely isn’t outlandish that he would choose to be cold to prevent any of that from happening.

After all, it was nothing more than a(n alleged) glare and an ignored greeting. Okay, maybe a number of ignored greetings, if he thinks really hard and recalls how Soobin had behaved similarly last week. 

But Kai’s an adult. He can take it. Even more so with the knowledge that Soobin doesn’t actually hate him.

God no, he’d better not. Kai wouldn’t know what to do if his other half decided to hate him.

But also god no, because it doesn’t actually get ‘better’ from there.

Their relationship situation at work is mostly neither of their faults, as far as Kai can argue, but apparently, their run-in from the previous day had somehow spurred Beomgyu to launch some sort of mission to help them to get along.

It starts later in the week when Kai has his guard completely down.

As per any usual work day, he logs into Teams the moment he arrives, finding a message from Beomgyu telling him they’ll be having a quick huddle over morning coffee. Being the oblivious and overzealous intern he is, Kai scurries his way to the pantry, only to find both Beomgyu and Soobin seated in front of a box of donuts. 

“Ah Kai-ya, our dearest, our team’s young and fresh blood!” Beomgyu claps his hands before grimacing at what’s probably a sheen of sticky grease that’s been transferred from one hand to another. He shakes it off quickly, rising from the ugly plastic chair to give his hands a strong pat against his pants before nudging Kai to where he had just been seated.

“I just remembered I have a call with a client in a few minutes so that meeting will have to wait. Help yourself to the donuts though, I got lots of them for the– for the well, the meeting.”

For someone who works in the marketing industry, Beomgyu’s objectively bad at lying, but his obvious act of faux innocence doesn’t amuse Kai at all. Not when he watches a million expressions flit across his ‘secret’ boyfriend’s face. 

As a matter of fact, Soobin quite literally has his fingers wrapped around a mochi donut and his other hand clutching a flask of coffee.

The exact same flask of coffee Kai brewed for Soobin this morning before he said he had to skip breakfast and head to work even earlier than usual.

Apparently, he'd been heading to work early for donuts that were part of Beomgyu’s ploy to get them to interact. 

Kai isn’t sure whether to laugh or cry.

But he does eventually decide that he wants to sit on the floor and throw a tantrum when Soobin gets up from his chair abruptly, startling Beomgyu and leaving Kai, well, for a lack of better terms, rather upset.

“I’ll get going to start work. Thanks for the really sweet donuts, Beomgyu.”

With that, he brushes past Kai who bows his head numbly. Never mind the sugary treats Beomgyu got, Kai’s positive he’s about to throw up any moment.

Beomgyu lies about mixing up the timing of his call, sitting him down and feeding him a pon de ring donut with a sympathetic look on his face.

It makes Kai feel even more pathetic.

But he undoubtedly feels the worst when he returns home to Soobin hugging and greeting him with sushi as if nothing had happened earlier that morning.

That failed attempt should rightfully have been the biggest hint to Beomgyu to quit his shenanigans and Kai, to his credit, quickly learns to be cautious enough to politely verify with his team lead if any request is strictly work-related.

So it is seriously a low blow when Beomgyu counters his cautiousness by sending another team member to trick him into having lunch together.

That sly, meddlesome man had decided to catch Kai when he was the most unsuspecting by using their sweetest team member. Kai has to admit that after they hit it off upon incidentally finding that they shared the same hobby of crocheting animal plushies, Woongki had squeezed his way into being one of his favorite co-workers to be around.

With the stunt he helped Beomgyu pull though? He's also easily squandered away all the faith Kai had in him.

But more importantly, this means all his defenses had been down when Woongki texted him about meeting at the cafeteria for lunch. It was easy to locate the single two-seater at the corner of the cafeteria ‘beside the monstrous bonsai’ as his colleague had indicated via text.

But the moment he steps forward and notices the familiar mop of jet-black hair toddling around, he tastes betrayal at the tip of his tongue.

In impeccable timing, Soobin turns around, an oblivious expression slapped across his face.

Wide eyes meet his and Kai fails to resist the urge to press his eyes shut and purse his lips.

Of all people, Soobin should rightfully recognize that as his ‘extremely annoyed face’. And he probably does, because when Kai is finally calm enough to open his eyes again, understanding is flashing in his lover's irises.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spots Beomgyu sharing a table with Woongki. Unlike Woongki who at least has the decency to shoot him an apologetic look, Beomgyu keeps his gaze flitting between the two of them in morbid anticipation. 

Kai has no idea why anyone on this Earth could be this meddlesome, but alas, here they are.

He has half a mind to get it over and done with by sitting down and pretending to have an awkward meal with Soobin just to take the chance to tell his big oaf of a boyfriend to at least be on decent hi-bye terms from now on.

But before he can even get to do that, Soobin stands up abruptly, his chair screeching obnoxiously and earning himself several looks from the other staff members in the vicinity.

Kai feels bile bubbling dangerously in his chest.

Choi Soobin, really? Is this your best solution?

But he isn't even granted a second glance before Soobin bolts out of the cafeteria. 

For a moment, his vision is trained on Soobin's receding back and he barely registers someone tugging on his arm and calling him to join their table.

His ears ring incessantly.

Kai can't even deny it right now.

He's hurt.

-

huepuppy
dick move, choi soobin
Sent: 2.41pm

Kai isn't usually someone who would take serious conversations with Soobin via texts. They'd been together for seven years after all – that's seven years of trying to understand each other, seven years of working problems out and communicating their fears and worries, seven years of deciding to stay together.

So it's frankly hard for Kai to grasp how it all came to this. All he knows is that he's frustrated, painfully so.

He inhales deeply, hands trembling slightly as he clutches his phone. 

Okay, maybe he should have spoken up the moment he felt uncomfortable with Soobin's approach towards the whole thing. 

Maybe he should have been candid instead of trying to rationalize Soobin's actions without realizing that while Soobin's career was important, so were his own feelings and considerations. 

Maybe he should have simply been honest with his lover and let him know that the sudden shift in their relationship dynamics has been difficult for him to cope with.

Incessant doubts and thoughts run through his head rapidly and he ducks his head lower, hoping the partitions around his tiny cubicle are enough to conceal the way his eyes are stinging as hee replays every interaction he's had with Soobin in the past few weeks.

Not just the cold and abrupt ones at work, but also the awkward silences and abruptly ended conversations they had at home.

It hurts. Goddamit, it hurts.

He blinks the bleariness out of his vision, perfectly in time to watch the ‘Sent’ status flip to ‘Read’. Indignance bleeds through his epidermis as he types another message with shaky fingers.

huepuppy
that was rude, in case you didn't realize
Sent: 2.44pm

‘Rude’ could hardly encapsulate the hurt and frustration surging through his veins. 

The speech bubble pops up briefly before disappearing and Kai begins to second-guess his impulsiveness. Begins to berate himself for sending a text while he was upset.

His corporate mantra had always been a simple ‘never reply to an email while upset’. But alas, despite their complicated work and personal relationship, at this moment, Soobin was no colleague of his.

He is Kai’s lover, his other half, and somehow, the lines getting blurred is leaving him painfully insecure.

But his phone buzzes in his hand and it’s crazy how much easier it is to breathe.

If there is something consistent about Soobin as his boyfriend, it’s that the man would never leave Kai hanging if he ever expressed his uneasiness about anything at all.

It’s at least slightly relieving that despite all his outlandish behavior, that instinct of Soobin hasn’t changed.

soobunny
I’m sorry baby
I promise I really am
I screwed up I know
Received: 2.46pm

It’s nothing substantial, but at least, Kai’s assured that he isn’t the only one who saw issues in the way they were struggling to interact at work.

huepuppy
then why did you do that?
mind you, you’ve behaved similarly since day one
Sent: 2.47pm

He bites his lip, fingers hovering over the onscreen keyboard.

huepuppy
if the problem is me
or maybe just me being here at all
just tell me
i’ll understand or at least know what i’m doing wrong
Sent: 2.48pm

This time, the reply he receives comes even faster than the previous one did.

soobunny
No!!!! Ofc not! 
How could anything be your fault?
It’s complicated
I swear it’s not what you think
Received: 2.48pm

Kai nearly screams. He’s pretty darn near to ripping his hair out and screaming his lungs out to channel his frustration somewhere.

soobunny
Meet me in the supply closet in 5
The one with stationery 
I’ll head there first
I need to explain and apologize to you in person
Received: 2.49pm

Even though this was essentially some sort of Serious Talk™ that he and Soobin hardly had beyond the teething years of their relationship, his body reacts completely appropriately by burning hot.

The idea of meeting his secret boyfriend in the supply closet is a lot more risque than it should really be, considering the current situation, and he chides himself for getting slightly worked up about the idea, needing to remind himself that it’s nothing sexy and everything serious.

But his delayed reply seems to cause Soobin to panic and a greedy part of Kai curses the fact that their teams are seated at opposite ends of the office because—

soobunny
Please baby
Received: 2.51pm

—god, is he dying to see the look on his lover’s face.

huepuppy
k
Sent: 2.54pm

-

Despite his unfounded eagerness which honestly makes him want to give himself a wake-up slap in the face, Kai arrives fashionably late.

Maybe he takes a few extra minutes under the guise of avoiding attracting unnecessary attention just in case someone notices both of them heading for the supply closet too closely after one another. But underlying these excuses might just be a hurt and childish Kai, hoping to punish Soobin for his coldness with just a few more minutes of anxious waiting.

And yet, he’d never felt so exposed and self-conscious as he strode past his colleagues' cubicles with a file as a prop just to head to the supply closet.

Barely anybody notices him, but there’s a sort of thrill in knowing he’s meeting his secret lover somewhere so obvious, and his nape prickles despite the situation.

Focus. You’re here to talk, he chides himself before turning the knob to step into the small room.

It’s not exactly a tight fit, the room spacious and deep enough for at least ten people or so, but he feels the air go still around him the moment he shuts the door behind him.

And sure enough, the air is drained out of his lungs when he’s immediately tackled into a tight hug, his file falling to the floor with a soft thud.

There’s a moment of confusion as he freezes, not expecting such a ‘warm welcome’ after he’d already begun to associate Team Lead Choi Soobin with only ignored greetings and harsh glares.

But the moment Soobin nuzzles his cheek against his neck, his mind turns blank, arms reaching around to instinctively squeeze his lover’s waist.

“I’m sorry, I really am,” Soobin mumbles against his neck and it sends a shiver down his spine.

Sometimes, the fact that it’s that easy for Soobin to melt his walls down both fascinates and scares him. After all, when they began their relationship seven years ago as high school sweethearts, neither of them expected to get this far, especially with the knowledge that they had yet to go through several key phases in life.

And now, seven years down the road, with just his lover’s arms wrapped around him, it’s almost natural for him to want to assure Soobin that everything’s okay.

But it’s not okay, and both of them know that.

Steeling his heart and reminding himself that honesty is the most precious expression of love, he pulls away from Soobin, gazing into the other man’s eyes for a drawn-out minute.

“You’ve been–” He frees his hands to gesture awkwardly, suddenly finding it hard to put all his thoughts into words. But Soobin remains patient, silent waiting for him to organize his thoughts.

“Not very nice,” he settles eventually, and it sounds a bit lame to his own ears.

Soobin nods in understanding but doesn’t interject despite the obvious guilt swimming in his eyes.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know how to explain what I’m feeling properly. It… It just sucks to be treated like that. I guess. Feels like I did something wrong but you’re not telling me.”

He isn’t being completely truthful about everything he’s been worrying about, but there’s a part of him that fears he’s coming across as too needy or too clingy, maybe even too sensitive, and he doesn’t have the courage to elaborate further.

Soobin slides his hands down to squeeze Kai’s forearms gently, and that simple action feels so tender, Kai wants to stay like this and never go back to his dreary Soobin-less cubicle.

Maybe he really is the clingy one huh?

“Kai-ya, it was never my intention to–”

His words are rudely interrupted when footsteps and voices reverberate from outside the supply closet.

Both of them freeze, Soobin’s hands going taut around Kai’s arms and for a moment, neither of them dares to even take a breath.

“I’m sayin’ Tyunnie saw Soobin head into the supply closet! And guess who I saw innocently trotting his way there too after? I’m a good Team Lead caring for my intern unlike yo–”

Beomgyu’s muffled voice grows louder and louder and somehow, both of them remain cryogenically frozen right till the door knob turns with an ominous click.

Kai hardly has any brainpower to consider whether he should regret not locking the door because the moment its flung open, he’s shoved backward abruptly, nearly colliding with the edge of the door.

Barely regaining his composure to find his footing, he’s only confused further when he looks up to find Soobin folding his arms and shooting the meanest glare at him.

For a moment, the air is so tense, Kai feels like a deer in the headlights precisely because of the way Soobin is glowering at him. Even more so than the mortifying fact that Beomgyu had just caught the two of them hanging out alone in the fucking supply closet.

“Soob—” He stops himself before he can call out to his lover on instinct, correcting himself meekly, “Team Lead Choi, I mean…”

That’s as far as he gets, his pounding heart quite literally caught in his throat. He must look pathetic right now with how he has shrunk into himself with his clammy hands clasped together.

“Kai-ssi, I expect th–the stacks of copier paper to always be in order in the future,” he barks gruffly and his voice is so cold, Kai literally wants to shrivel up and cry.

It’s stupid, honestly. The whole thing’s fucking stupid – from the way Soobin’s stuttering and pretending to reprimand him for some stupid reason he pulled out of his ass, down to the way Kai’s just standing there taking it all.

You see, Kai isn’t someone with a fragile ego. Neither does he expect his lover to coddle him in a work setting. If he made a mistake that warranted a scolding from Soobin, he’d take it willingly. He’s a professional, grown adult. He can take responsibility for his mistakes.

But the issue is that he hadn’t made any mistake. Yet the man humiliating him unnecessarily is his lover.

And god, does it sting.

“What is going on here, Soobin? Why are you speaking to my team member like this?” Beomgyu ventures carefully, and there’s a certain rigidity to his words that sounds foreign to Kai, who had only heard his team lead speak in chirpy or at least professionally friendly tones.

Despite how awful he feels, Kai forces himself to interrupt before he ends up making things even more difficult for Soobin by keeping silent.

“I messed up the order of the copier paper when I was moving the reams to get something. Sorry, Team Leader Choi, it won’t happen again.”

Suddenly exhausted from the entire exchange, Kai bows numbly before squeezing his way past Beomgyu to exit the room. His shame only multiplies tenfold when he realizes Team C’s Lead, Yeonjun, had been the person trailing after Beomgyu and the man only shoots him a sympathetic look as Kai bows again before passing him too.

It isn’t the most polite thing for him to just brush past three of his seniors, but he feels like he’s been doused in a bucket of ice-cold water with how Soobin just did the exact thing he had explained hurt him.

The rest of the day crawls by as he gets through his paperwork on autopilot. His phone buzzes several times in his pocket and Beomgyu comes by his desk so frequently, it’s almost comical. Each time, he’d drop a random sweet treat on his desk, the look on his face so sorry as if he were seconds away from offering his condolences.

He must have told Woongki something too, knowing he is the closest to Kai out of their team members, because the boy ends up dropping by Kai’s desk before 5, helping him with his presentation deck so they can knock off on time.

By then, Kai’s aware that his phone had been going off a number of times and he dumps it into his bag, listlessly nodding while Woongki tries to distract him with a story of how he’d mistaken his neighbor’s dog for his own and ended up accusing him to be a dog thief.

It isn’t as if Kai doesn’t appreciate their efforts to cheer him up, but more than disgruntled, he’s genuinely disappointed in Soobin’s actions. So frankly, he feels too awful for any of their attempts to yield results.

He has to admit now that their shifting dynamics are stressing him out. It’s almost as if he didn’t know the Soobin standing before him, despite all the years they’d spent together. More importantly, the thought of the distance between them growing insurmountable scares him to no end.

All he wants is for Soobin to hold him. 

All he wants is for Soobin to tell him that things are okay.

That they’re okay.

-

Woongki ends up walking him down a couple of streets before they split, Kai heading to the train station and his colleague walking in the opposite direction to catch his bus home.

It isn’t as if Kai’s completely lost hope in Soobin, but he still feels his heart jump ever so slightly when he rounds the bend to find someone peering at him from behind a life-sized standee of Cha Eunwoo holding some face product. 

Soobin’s long and gangly limbs are poorly concealed behind the standee and on any other day, Kai swears he’d have burst out laughing and bounded up to pinch the other man’s cheeks.

But there isn’t anything left in his tired body to muster any sort of amusement right now, so he proceeds to walk right past the row of shops, ignoring Soobin’s presence with nothing more than a curt glance.

Only after he hears the other man hurry after him from behind does he notice they’re at the exact spot Soobin accompanied him to, on his first day of work, before they separated – Soobin heading to the office first and Kai trailing after him with a decent distance between.

That had been the only time they shared their journey to work.

As footsteps clatter behind him, it sinks in further that this would ironically be the first time they’re heading home together since Kai started to work here.

Maybe Kai’s soft.

Maybe Kai’s just a romantic at heart.

Maybe Kai’s just so in love with Soobin that he chooses to believe that the other man has some valid reason to explain his outlandish actions and has the propensity to correct his actions.

 Or maybe he’s simply tired and needs Soobin, even if he’s been an absolute dick.

Because once they’re squeezed together in the train, pressed shoulder to shoulder with how packed the carriage is, Kai can’t resist the urge to brush his hand against Soobin’s.

It’s nothing more than a light touch, but he keeps his hand there and the implication spurs his lover to grab his hand quickly the moment he realizes he’s been given some form of permission to touch Kai.

Kai hates how easy he is. Hates how easy it is for the coldness at the pit of his stomach to slowly be replaced by a flush of heat just because he has Soobin’s fingers interlaced with his.

But he strikes a compromise with himself, refusing to say a thing the whole way home.

Soobin never lets go of his hand.

-

The tension between them persists till they arrive back at their apartment and the moment they kick their shoes off and shut the door behind them, Kai’s pulled into a tight hug.

A wave of deja vu sweeps over him and he hazily recalls that Soobin never managed to explain himself during their hastily aborted conversation earlier.

“You’ve got to stop doing this every time you fuck up.”

It’s a bit harsh and Kai doesn’t think he’d ever have any complaints about having too many hugs, not when Soobin’s hugs are simply something else, always conveying every ounce of tender affection he has.

But the problem between them remains and Kai is nothing if not determined to talk this out properly after weeks of skirting around the topic.

Still, the way Soobin flinches sends his stomach sinking, but he stands his ground even when his lover draws away to look at him with sad eyes.

“Hugging me and apologizing won’t cut it this time. We need to talk it out.”

Soobin nods, lip caught between his teeth.

“I want to go first,” Kai starts. He’d had enough time to map out all the things he wanted to say and he’d be damned if he didn't decide to be completely transparent this time around.

“Your attitude in the office hurt me. Several times, honestly. I’ve tried to rationalize it, tried to put myself in your shoes. I know you have a lot to lose if rumors begin to get spread even if they’re untrue, but there are better ways to go about this. We don’t have to be friendly, but you ignoring me, glaring at me, shoving me away, and pretending to chide me in front of my own superiors made me fee– made me feel disrespected.”

He inhales sharply, trying to ignore the way his sinuses burn.

“It hurts when you pretend as if nothing’s wrong after we clock off. And it hurts even more when I consider that you might be behaving this way because I’ve done something wrong to affect your work but don’t trust me enough to tell me where I went wrong.”

His voice turns meek, almost fearful as his thoughts spiral. 

“It feels like the distance between us is greater and ever and I’m afraid one day, you’ll treat me as coldly as you do at work, even when it’s just the two of us.”

The words hang in the air heavily but despite the tense atmosphere, Kai feels as if the taut string that had been wound in his chest has been slowly loosened, now that he’s honest about all the dark thoughts plaguing his head in the past couple of weeks.

He chances a glance at Soobin, unsure of what to expect.

It had been a long time since they had an issue requiring a talk this serious and all of it is nervewracking. 

Relationships are always a work in progress, Kai guesses, no matter how long they’ve been together and how comfortable they’ve gotten.

But perhaps, this discussion on their work-life boundaries was long due. Maybe ever since they received the news that Kai would be joining Soobin’s company.

“I’m sorry,” Soobin begins carefully. “I was being stupid. We’ve been together for so long, have been intimate and close all along that when we’re suddenly put in a setting where me doing all of that could fuck both our careers up, I didn’t know how to act. It’s not an excuse, I swear. I know I hurt you and nothing will ever justify the hurt I caused you. I just– I just can’t–”

Soobin pauses, his ears tinting red and Kai has a hard time predicting what he’s about to say.

“Every time I’m close to you, it’s muscle memory for me to cling to you, to want to hold you. And every time I look at you, I can’t help but–” He gestures awkwardly with his hands. “Can’t help but stare.”

Kai feels like he’s been flattered and slapped in the face all at once.

“What?”

Running his hand through his hair, Soobin groans, flushing an even darker shade of red.

“Kai,” he says seriously, squeezing Kai’s hands. 

“The problem is that I don’t know how to be around you without wanting to touch you. I can’t pretend. I can’t act like we’re strangers because I can’t fight the urge to want to pull you close to me. You don’t get how I used to get through each tough workday with the thought of returning home to you at night.”

He blows at his bangs, giving Kai a glimpse of his forehead which is shockingly just as red as the rest of his face.

“Okay, maybe I’ve also had some stupid fantasies of you visiting me at work and having some porno-type sexy time but this now? With you working here with me? In this space?! I was going crazy and the best I could do was to make sure to keep my hands to myself, but Christ, I forgot it was illegal to look!”

Confusion impedes all attempts by Kai to understand the word vomit that just left Soobin’s lips.

“To look? Look at what? And fantasies? What fantasies?”

“You! Christ, Kai, you don’t get how hot you look in your clothes. God! On your first day, you wore those criminally tight pants though your jacket was swallowing you up and you just looked so delectable during intros when you took off your jacket I was practically ogling you. God, this is fucked up.”

“You were ogling me?!”

Soobin doesn’t seem to care that Kai’s extremely baffled and he continues to rattle away.

“I know, I know, we’ve been together for seven years and I get to eat your ass every other day but you looked so good and cute and your really sweet team lead Choi fucking Beomgyu caught me practically drooling during your introduction.”

Kai had expected a plethora of reasons – mostly career-related – and this was definitely giving his logic a run for its money.

Now, it’s his turn to burn hot with this ridiculous revelation.

“B-Beomgyu?”

Soobin rolls his eyes, and his sassiness would be cute were Kai not reeling from the sudden out-of-the-box news.

“Yes, your ‘really sweet team lead Choi’,” – Soobin rolls his eyes again and Kai nearly passes out from the realization that his boyfriend had been pettily jealous of his team lead – “He caught me, smirked at me, and proceeded to tease the hell out of me. Listen–” he turns serious, hands gripping Kai’s shoulders. 

“It sounds stupid because I’m just stupidly in love with you, the whole thing sounds unbelievably funny. But the moment he cornered me, I knew I fucked up. We could lose our careers and more importantly, I know how your work at the newsroom sucked all the life out of you.”

He sucks in a deep breath before continuing, “I know how challenging it was for you to make such a daring switch and start from zero after achieving what you already had elsewhere. This internship is important to you and I couldn’t let my stupid actions screw up everything for you.”

Kai blinks slowly, the fragments of Soobin’s desperate explanation slowly coming together in his head.

“So you overcompensated,” he states, watching regret settle in Soobin’s irises again. “You wanted to flip the narrative. You wanted Beomgyu to think you were staring at me out of annoyance and not interest.”

Soobin’s gaze falls to the ground.

“It was stupid, but I couldn’t think of any other way to stop him from cooking some story and bringing all the attention to us. He’s– He’s a good person and a great colleague, but I just can’t trust anyone when your career is at stake. I have a rather impassive persona at work, so after I waved him off, I tried to be even more stern, but it backfired and made him want to meddle so we would be on better terms instead.”

“I’m the reason why he started to put us in those awkward situations. I’m sure everything made you feel uncomfortable. I’m sorry. Not only for that, but also for my behavior. It was uncalled for. I didn’t know how to act, didn’t know how to convey my thoughts to you without sounding like a loony pervert.”

There’s a long, pregnant pause after he finishes his explanation that and Kai is dangerously close to bursting out in laughter especially after how he’s been weighed down by all these awful emotions for such a long time.

“God!” Soobin yells shrilly, the sight even more amusing. “You were working so hard and instead, I was there busy getting hard just from looking at you. And right now, these stupid excuses can’t even undo the fact that I hurt you. You’re kinda right. I fuck up everything I do.”

It’s Kai’s turn to interject, now that he finally has a clearer picture of the entire situation.

“You don’t,” he says slowly and finally, he cracks a smile – just a tiny one! – when Soobin’s head pops up in near-comedic fashion. 

As pathetic as it sounds, Kai’s immensely relieved to know that Soobin still cares. He went about it in the strangest way possible, but it’s oddly flattering to hear that his lover is still crazy over him even after they’ve been together for a considerably long time.

“You don’t fuck up everything you do. I wish you’d have explained yourself earlier so we could discuss this properly and decide how to act around each other. But I can also see why you were hesitant to start the whole conversation on something… Something admittedly surprising.”

Soobin buries his face in his hands.

“I’m a pathetic pervert now,” he whispers dramatically and this time, Kai huffs out an incredulous laugh, hands finding Soobin’s to pry them away gently from his face.

“Haven’t you always been one?”

Soobin has the gall to look mortified.

“More importantly, even though you behaving like a dick hurt me, I was more worried that we were drifting apart and I’m… I’m glad you still care that much about me and well, find me attractive too.”

The expression on Soobin’s face turns completely aghast.

“I’ve spent over a quarter of my life lusting over you. You think I'm going to quit anytime soon? And of course, I care about you. You’re the most precious person in my life. I never want to ruin things for you. I just went about things the wrong way and no matter how many times I apologize, I can’t undo the hurt I caused you.”

Kai decides that he is indeed an easy man, because Soobin uttering those sincere words leaves him immensely grounded and he can’t help but lean in to press a gentle kiss on Soobin’s lips.

“I won’t say the hurt’s magically gone, but thank you for being honest. We can navigate this together. Figure things out. That’s why there are two of us in this relationship.”

Soobin rolls his eyes playfully, clearly relieved. “Cuz two heads are better than one?”

“No, because at least one of us needs to actually have a brain in that skull.”

Soobin’s bewilderment from being insulted is an adorable sight to behold and Kai quells his complaints with another kiss.

Maybe it’s also been a while since they had been intimate like this, what with all the stress piled up, and it feels comforting being close to Soobin without heavy thoughts plaguing his mind.

Eventually, Soobin drags him to the couch to cuddle, their limbs tangled as he clings to Kai, barely letting him free one hand just so he can order dinner for delivery.

In the comfortable silence, Kai runs through everything Soobin had mentioned earlier, belatedly trying to fill the tiny missing pieces he may have missed.

A smug grin plays on his lips when he recalls something. He pinches his boyfriend’s waist, successfully catching his attention with a yelp.

“What?”

“Earlier you mentioned you had, and I quote, fantasies of me visiting you at work and having some porno-type sexy time. So…”

Soobin groans.

-

Kai’s thankful that Beomgyu has a soft spot for him, because the following week, he orchestrates an ‘accidental’ brush-in with Soobin in front of the guy. It goes pretty hilariously, what with his team lead tensing up beside him and nearly about to wedge himself between Kai and Soobin.

But Kai manages to rush a hurried greeting to Soobin with a bow before Beomgyu launches into his protective mode. In return, Soobin responds with a nod and a curt ‘good afternoon’.

And all Kai needed to do was to heave an audible sigh of relief when Soobin was finally out of earshot.

Eyeing him carefully, Beomgyu ventures. “Everything okay between you and Soobin now?”

He nods with what he believes is a relieved smile. “I felt bad about messing up the paper reams and pissing him off,” – cringe cringe cringe – “so I apologized to him again this morning. He seems less annoyed with me now.”

Beomgyu stares at him for an unnervingly long time and Kai almost thinks he might have slipped up unknowingly, but his team lead ends up letting out a sigh of relief too and Kai relaxes.

“Thank god. I was about to swap his tin of coffee creamer with chalk dust if he continued to be a dick to my intern.”

Kai scrunches his nose, though he feels bad for basically lying to his really sweet team lead. “Please don’t do that. He’ll end up benefiting from the company’s work injury insurance.”

Barking out an incredulous laugh, Beomgyu waves him off. “That’s nothing compared to what I’ve already done to his snack stash. Demolished the whole stash the moment he scolded you over those silly stacks of paper.”

This time, it’s Kai’s turn to laugh in disbelief.

-

With the onslaught of year-end campaigns and events, Kai’s team ends up being completely swamped by the wave of work. Kai manages to earn himself enough trust to be assigned to lead one of the key Christmas campaigns in just his second month, which is impressive on its own, considering he’s only an intern with no prior experience in the field.

The pressure is on, but determined to prove his capabilities, he grits through the rounds and rounds of critique over the next two months before finishing the project with a well-executed and well-received digital ad campaign for their company’s Christmas product launch.

Considering the scale of their company’s usual projects, a single Christmas product is not that impressive, but Soobin is apparently very updated on his boyfriend’s whereabouts. 

Because the day the PPC report for Kai’s campaign is disseminated to all teams, he takes an urgent half day off just so he can surprise Kai with a celebratory homecooked dinner comprising all his favorite dishes that evening, complete with a giant bowl of bingsu – courtesy of the shaved ice machine he had snagged during the latest Black Friday online sales.

Much to Soobin’s disgruntlement, his lavish celebration is one-upped by Kai’s team lead the very next day at their department meeting, when Beomgyu announces that he would be sponsoring free-flow booze for their year-end party to celebrate Kai’s conversion from an intern to an official staff member.

Soobin’s happy for him, Kai knows, but that doesn’t stop him from spamming Kai’s messages with tons of eye-roll emojis when Beomgyu makes the announcement proudly before dramatically bowing in response to the excited cheers.

Kai loves his petty and jealous little boyfriend.

And that petty and jealous little boyfriend also ends up having his eyes glued on Kai throughout the year-end party. 

Music is pounding, the crowd is chattering, Soobin’s staring.

Unbridled and shameless, if he may add.

Kai can’t say he’s complaining. Maybe he’s a little worried that some of their more observant colleagues might notice how one of the team leads has been staring at their newest junior staff member the whole time. But everyone’s mostly inebriated thanks to the free booze so Kai lets it slide.

He’s starting to understand what his lover meant when he said that he couldn’t stop himself from ogling him.

Perhaps the celebratory mood and giddiness from having a rather decent start to his newfound career have him a little woozy. Because instead of shooting Soobin a warning glare like he should, he slips out his phone while loud music reverberates in the room and all their colleagues are screaming and cheering as Woongki busts out an admittedly enticing cover performance of Rania’s Dr Feel Good.

huepuppy
supply closet in 10?
i’ll sneak out after you
Sent: 7.32pm

His heart races unhealthily and he dares not look in Soobin's direction, instead bobbing along and whistling half-heartedly when Beomgyu slides between Woongki's legs to improvise some sort of highly inappropriate couple choreography that makes the crowd burst into screams.

On any other day, Kai would absolutely react much more dramatically to his team lead and close colleague, who were defying every HR rule by dancing this dirtily in front of everyone.

Right now though, he's flushing hot and nervous from the HR rules he's aware he's practically seducing Soobin to break.

There's a lot on the line, that's undeniable.

But with how he’s on cloud nine with all the good news and how Soobin has been unabashedly eating him with his eyes all night, he can't help but want to play with fire.

A maximum of two minutes pass before his attempt at playing it cool fails upon realizing Soobin has yet to reply to his message, and he subtly turns to where his boyfriend had just been standing moments prior. 

He just had to be sure. What if he’d read the other man wrong?

But he’s slightly puzzled when he realizes that Soobin's nowhere to be found.

His phone buzzes in his hand.

soobunny
Already inside
Received: 7.34pm

Soobin’s eagerness actually makes Kai bark out a laugh, which he quickly disguises as a reaction to Beomgyu and Woongki’s increasingly indecorous dance battle. He’s almost certain they’d be grinding against each other if he so much turned away for another second anyway.

And he does – in fact, he turns and pretends to head for the washroom before rerouting and sneaking in the direction of the supply closet, unwilling to wait another second longer.

There’s something incredibly illegal about this and the thrill running up his spine makes his veins burst with desire so raw, it could rival Soobin’s usual depraved ways.

Glancing around to ensure no one’s in the vicinity, Kai turns the doorknob. 

Crazy how the last exchange they shared in this exact spot had left Kai on the verge of tears just a few months ago.

And now, deja vu hits him like a freight train when he opens the door slowly, only to be greeted by Soobin who barrels right into him.

Except, this time, it isn’t an apologetic hug. Instead, Soobin has him pressed against the door with a thud and his hands pinned above his head.

It’s almost as if Soobin wants to replace Kai’s awful memory of this place, redoing everything by showing him exactly what he meant when he first explained that he “didn’t know how to be around Kai without wanting to touch him”.

And any stray thought in his head tunes out into white noise with the way Soobin wastes no time to lick into his mouth, their teeth clashing erratically.

It’s hot, wet, messy, but Kai can’t ask for anything more, kissing back with just as much fervor.

Soobin lets go of his hands eventually and Kai smiles against his lips when he hears the click of the lock from behind.

And his boyfriend pulls back to shoot him a smug smirk which looks a lot more like a goofy and silly grin.

“Not letting anyone interrupt us this time.”

Shaking his head, Kai allows Soobin to grab his hand and pull him further into the supply closet.

“If someone finds the room locked, we’re dead all the same.”

His warning goes ignored with a shrug and Kai gets his confirmation that he isn’t the only one in dangerously high spirits today when Soobin simply spins him around to push him against the stacks of copier paper.

Kai nearly laughs at the reminder of how he’d supposedly gotten chided because of these exact reams. Any laughter dies in his throat when he feels Soobin slide his hand from his waist down to his ass, squeezing down boldly and groaning even more shamelessly.

“Fuck– You wore this on purpose after I told you it made me go crazy on your first day. It’s not just the pants you know? Christ. Mint looks so pretty on you.”

Feigning ignorance, Kai tilts his head as he blinks. “What do you mean? This is my usual office attire… Team Lead Choi.”

He flushes, cringing a little bit at his own attempt at roleplay – or rather, his attempt at pushing Soobin’s buttons, knowing his lover had a plethora of inappropriate fantasies about Kai at the workplace. 

Thankfully, his embarrassing act yields some sort of reward in the form of his lover groaning again and continuing to grope him more desperately.

“Is this how you want to play? Kai-ssi?”

It’s funny how months ago, Soobin gruffly greeting him with the same authoritative and clipped tone only brought him despair. Yet, it’s the exact same voice that sends his blood run south like a loser.

“Walking around the office in such tight pants? Were you trying to seduce your colleagues?”

There’s something so hot about knowing Soobin’s finally snapped and thrown all caution to the wind to touch his lover like this at their office as if they don’t already spend most of their time out of work together.

A gasp is pried out from his lips when Soobin wastes no time to pop his pants open, dragging the zipper down as he kisses his jaw.

“N-No, just you. Wanted you to ah– to look at me more.” The stuttering is embarrassing but it’s hard to speak properly or even get his thoughts right when the other man is already running his fingers along his clothed length.

The way his actions are urgent yet teasing is killing Kai and he’s positive he’s about to combust.

“We can’t– We can’t do this here, Team Lead Choi. What if someone comes in?”

He’s having way too much fun playing a clueless intern but his instincts must be right, because it sends Soobin hissing.

Such a simple pervert.

Kai loves this simple pervert.

“We’ll just have to be quick hm?”

Any reply dies in Kai’s throat, replaced with a yelp when his underwear and pants are yanked down roughly.

“Choi Soobin! You almost ripped it!” He smacks his lover in the arm, though his words go ignored as Soobin focuses on hoisting him up by his bare thighs and god. Sitting on the reams of packed copier paper with his bare ass like that is painfully dirty and he can quite literally feel the glossy surface cling to his skin.

“That’ll teach you not to tease me like that.”

Kai rolls his eyes, though he can’t formulate a retort when Soobin distracts him by pulling his shoes and pants off so he can spread his legs apart.

He’s incredibly exposed, his embarrassingly hard length flopping out and hitting the cool air and it feels painfully risky to be doing something this dirty while their colleagues are just at the other end of the same office.

“Aren’t you a good intern? Spreading yourself open for your boss?”

Kai’s mouth runs dry. As ridiculous as this whole roleplay thing is, he can’t help but want to play along with how drunkenly into it his lover is.

“Ah, Team Leader Choi, I’m just an intern. I don’t know anything. I need you to lead me.” He cringes when the words leave his lips, but that doesn’t stop him from playing up the act by covering his mouth when Soobin grabs his length, stroking it.

It’s not so much an act anymore when he has to muffle a moan against his palm when Soobin wraps his lips around his length, wasting no time to sink down.

Pleasure shoots up his veins and Kai throws his head back, grabbing a fistful of the other man’s hair with one hand.

“Fuck!”

Soobin’s relentlessly fucking his mouth on his cock and each time his tip hits the back of the other man’s throat, he swears he sees stars.

Toes curling, he wraps his ankles around Soobin’s torso to yank him closer and he’s completely sure that nothing will ever be as hot as the way his lover chokes on his cock with the sudden movement.

It’s slightly cruel, but each cough against his sensitive tip sends him shuddering and it takes him a few more seconds before he has the awareness to pull Soobin off his cock to caress his flushed cheeks.

“S-Sorry– fuck–”

He runs his fingers across his face, aware of how dazed he looks because Jesus Christ, does Soobin look fucked out.

Just from sucking his dick for a few minutes?

The blood roaring in his ears rivals the pounding of the bass from the party in the distance.

“This part of your fantasy too? Choking on my cock?”

Kai’s never been excellent at dirty talk and even something this mild sounds vulgar to his ears.

But Soobin nods dazedly, his lips parted and tongue darting out to lick them, and Kai’s positive he’s never been this turned on.

“What else did you imagine us doing huh?”

“Eating you out in here.” His reply is instantaneous and candidly delivered, Kai has no idea whether to laugh or bust a nut at the thought of how horny Soobin gets just because of him.

“Eating you out while you bunch your shirt up so we don’t make a mess and you muffling your cries against your arm because our colleagues could walk in any time but you still end up begging for my dick because I am crazy good at eating you out but it’s still not enough. If you wanted to like uh– know the details, I mean.”

A whole five seconds pass before Kai barks out a laugh.

“That’s oddly detailed. Do I also call you senpai or something while all that goes?”

Soobin’s jaw falls open.

“How did you know?!”

“You’re impossible,” Kai complains, though he peels himself off the stacks of copier paper, cringing when he notices the imprint of his ass and traces of precum and slobber on the side of the topmost pack.

It isn’t the first time Soobin’s eaten him out. If anything, his boyfriend is extremely zealous about doing just that. But the fact that they’re doing this outside – somewhere they 100% should not be doing this – drives him crazy and a lethal cocktail of shame and anticipation floods his veins as he turns around, bracing himself against where he’d just sat and got his dick sucked like a good boy.

And a good boy he is again, sticking his ass out and bending over to present himself to his lover.

His face grows hot when he receives no audible response.

But where Soobin is shamelessly horny, Kai’s just as ready to play into his desires, so he swallows his sense of shame turning his head to gaze at the other man with pleading eyes.

“Hurry senpai, aren’t you going to reward me for being the intern of the month before we get caught?”

Wiggling his ass for good measure, he bites his lip in what he’s sure is an embarrassing and exaggerated attempt at seduction.

He barely gets a glimpse of Soobin’s dazed expression morphing into blatant hunger before the man drops to his knees instantly, wasting no time to spread his legs wider so he can quite literally bury his face into his ass.

A gasp falls from his lips and Kai turns back instantly to bury his face into his arms instinctively, trying to stifle his surprised moan when his lover lands a spank on his buttcheek before spreading his ass wide open.

Oh my god, maybe Soobin’s silly little fantasies were actually prophecies.

There’s little time for him to stew in embarrassment – not when his lover pries his attention right back by latching his lips on his pucker.

“Soob– Ah!” He sinks his teeth down onto his arm, ignoring the fact that he’s getting spit on his shirt. Had he known they’d be getting down and dirty like this, he would’ve done himself a favor and worn a dark-colored shirt instead.

But regret is the last thing on his mind when he finds himself speared open on Soobin’s tongue.

They’d literally just had sex the night before, but there’s something so thrilling about this entire experience that makes Kai’s legs quiver like a helpless virgin.

Everything’s rushed – from the way Soobin pounced onto him the moment he entered, just to give him a sloppy blowjob and then proceed to rim him messily and without much sense of coordination. 

Yet, it might be the urgency that really has Kai abandoning all attempts at staying quiet as he arches his back and the moment Soobin begins to prod into his heat with his tongue, hands roaming all over his inner thighs and occasionally brushing past his leaking length.

Maybe Kai’s the pervert. 

Because he should rightfully be cautious about anyone finding them missing and looking for them, or maybe even worried that someone might pass by the exact moment he loses control and lets out a moan that goes just a little bit too loud to be concealed by the loud music from outside.

But he’s sure that this thrill is only adding to his desperation as he pushes backward, hungry to feel more of Soobin’s deft tongue on his most sensitive region.

Good choice. Wise choice, really, because that spurs the other man to speed things up, sliding two fingers straight into his heat.

He’s opening him up. He’s opening him up for what’s to come and god does that make Kai go even crazier.

“Soobin– Ah– more please! Faster!”

Being the best boy he is, Soobin gives him exactly what he asks for, suckling his rim while thrusting his fingers with accurate precision.

The realization that his lover knows his body so well, knows exactly what he likes and how he likes it, leaves him moaning like an absolute slut as he tries uselessly to cover his mouth with one hand. It’s to avail, honestly, what with Soobin progressing quickly to three fingers and driving him crazy with the burn and the stretch from the lack of lubricant.

He’s seconds from crying and humiliation hits him square in the jaw when he realizes he’s doing exactly every single thing Soobin fantasized about him doing.

Every shameless thing.

Unfortunately for his ego, he can’t find it in him to fight his desires.

“Hurry Soobin, hurry please.”

He’s begging and good god, he needs to pipe it down before someone hears them but–

“I need you inside!”

One second he’s begging for cock, and the next, all sources of pleasure stop when Soobin freezes behind him.

He’s about to whine in frustration but the other man beats him to it, pulling his fingers out and drawing away.

“Do you have lube?”

It’s a stupid question to ask after they’ve gone so far and frankly, Kai knows that Soobin would be happy just to finish him off if he didn’t want to go all the way.

But he’d literally just begged for cock.

And he’d done so not because it was part of Soobin’s fantasy, but because he needed it.

“Just do it like that.”

“But–”

“I need to feel you stretch me out.” Every word falling from his lips is so dirty, so visceral and so vulgar and he’s far too humiliated to turn around and look at his lover’s face. 

“I like it when it hurts a bit, especially when I can feel you inside.”

Mind hazy, Kai barely manages to clear his head before a metallic clang and rustle from behind sends his throat drying up right away.

He’s vaguely aware of how Soobin spits into his hand, probably to try to slick up his length as best as he can, but he only snaps back into awareness when he feels his hot tip prodding at his hole.

“Fuck– Are you sure?”

“Yeah.” He turns, meeting Soobin’s heated gaze. It’s swimming with unadulterated lust and Kai goes dizzy with the awareness that Soobin wants him just as bad as he always had even after seven whole years.

He’s a romantic at heart, sue him.

“Want senpai’s dick so bad.” A smirk plays at Kai’s lips as he watches Soobin’s jaw drop, though it’s fucked right off his face when the other man heeds his words and pushes in.

Blood roars in his ears, culminating in a thrumming headache at the back of his skull.

It stings, it burns, and Kai’s positive he can feel every single ridge and every single vein on Soobin’s cock as he enters him excruciatingly slow, his own mouth hanging wide open as he stops breathing for a good moment.

“Relax,” Soobin whispers, and Kai tries to heed his words. Tries to regulate his breathing in tandem with the way Soobin’s now running a warm palm against his chest to soothe him.

“We can stop anytime if it hurts too much.”

Now this pries him back to reality and he shakes his head vehemently, growing light-headed from the rapid movement.

Soobin kisses the shell of his ear in silent assurance just as his pelvis meets Kai’s ass.

Arms circle his chest to hold him firmly and Kai can feel Soobin’s heart pounding wildly against his back as they’re pressed flush against one another.

“Fuck. You’re so tight around me.” 

Soobin’s hot breath tickles his ear and he’s thankful for his lover’s eternal habit of putting him first, aware of how he’s holding back just so Kai can adjust to his size.

“I need a moment,” he pants out, trying not to clench down on his lover.

“Of course baby. Take all the time you need, we have all the time in the world.”

“Even with the possibility of anyone coming by and realizing the supply closet is locked?” He laughs weakly and that seems to help Soobin relax too, what with the man huffing softly and nipping his earlobe playfully.

“If your really sweet team lead’s the one to walk into us, I’m sure he’ll be asking to join in to ravish your supple flesh instead of marching to HR,” Soobin sniffs in response, letting one hand slip under Kai’s shirt to knead at his chest and circle his sensitive nubs.

Kai gasps from the sudden touch and possessive edge in his lover’s words, his slightly soft cock beginning to perk up in interest as the pain from the stretch begins to ebb away.

It’s unspoken that the other man’s words are meant to distract him, since the idea of Soobin having been irrationally jealous of Beomgyu for getting to be his team lead had already become a running joke between them.

But in this situation, with his dick in his ass, Kai thinks it makes all of this even hotter.

Turning around, he bats his eyelashes with the most innocent look he can muster.

“Then, does senpai want to show the new intern who he belongs to?”

He’s playing with fire, he knows. But god does it send a thrill down his spine when he feels Soobin’s length twitch inside him and his arms go rigid.

“Kai, don’t.”

He clenches down on Soobin, eliciting a hiss.

“Hurry, senpai. Before my team lead walks in and finds me slutted out on your dick like this. You don’t want him to see me like this, don’t you?”

There’s no warning before Soobin’s hand disappears from under his shirt, finding his nape to press him down against the stacks of copier paper instead.

A thump resounds from the movement, and Kai doesn’t quite care about the noise they’re making.

Not when Soobin’s pulling out just to swiftly buck his hips with obscene smacks.

Kai’s legs nearly buckle with the force, loud gasps punctuating each breath as Soobin drills into him.

The stretch burns and each movement is rougher, more forceful, with how the lack of lubricant has left the slide less smooth than they’re used to.

Meanwhile, Soobin’s reduced to a mess of groans as he drives his hips continuously, each resounding smack cracking through the air incredibly filthy.

Flipping onto his cheek, Kai can only lay there and take it, nails digging into the resin-coated cover of a poor ream. He vaguely registers tearing a hole in one of them, but that’s hardly a concern when he’s more focused on the girth entering him over and over.

“So good– Fuck– ah! It’s so good!”

The onslaught of pain-addled pleasure sends his brain to mush and all he can manage are weak moans and babbles.

The hand behind his nape disappears and before he can wonder why, the fingers wrapped around his now-hard length send a sharp jolt of pleasure down his spine and this time, he makes no effort to muffle the cry that leaves his lips.

Anyone passing the room would certainly be privy to the filthy act taking place inside.

Fuck it, Kai thinks, bucking his hips into Soobin’s fist and pushing back in tandem with his thrusts. 

He’s seen how some of their colleagues eye Soobin too. Has heard some of them gossiping and wondering if he’s really attached as he had occasionally mentioned, if he’s looking to date if he’s broken up with that anonymous person, if he’s even just lying about being attached.

Maybe he’s not the only one that’s slightly possessive. Or rather, maybe he’s not the only one who wants to shove it into their faces that Soobin does belong to someone.

That Soobin belongs to him.

That he’s the one who gets to be slutted out on Soobin’s dick because the man simply can’t resist him regardless of where and when.

It’s irrational – probably something that is only crossing his mind because of how his lover’s pulsing length is scorching him inside out with each drag against his walls – but it does contribute significantly to his steadily rising orgasm meter.

“Harder Soo–Soobin, I need to come. Please– ah! Please, please pleas–”

Snaking a free hand around his waist, Soobin presses down harshly where he can feel his length practically impaling Kai and leaving his belly distended.

It’s the unexpected pressure that sends white-hot pleasure shooting up Kai’s spine and without warning, he’s jerking hard and spilling all over Soobin’s hand with a soundless moan.

Twitching in the other man’s grasp, Kai’s fingers go numb, his body completely going lax.

Black dots fill his vision and he lays splayed over the desecrated packs of copier paper, glad that they hadn’t simply toppled over with how hard they had been going at it.

Limbs rendered useless, he stays unmoving, letting his lover slow down his thrusts slowly before he comes to a complete stop.

“Good boy– fuck so good for me, my love.”

Soobin’s voice falls into a whisper as he presses soft kisses along the planes of Kai’s back. The orgasm had wrecked through Kai’s frame so hard, leaving his brain mushy, and it takes him a few moments to realize that his lover has yet to come.

It’s considerably gross to some, but Kai doesn’t quite give a damn when he’s dying with a need to see Soobin come. And it’s not like he can head home looking like he wet his pants, so he does what he can do, pushing blindly at his boyfriend till he pulls out, only to fall to his knees and take Soobin’s angrily hard cock in his hand.

“Kai! That’s–”

He tilts his head, the other man’s length just centimeters from his lips.

“You don’t want to come?”

Soobin shakes his head looking conflicted.

“No, this is hot and all but isn’t– Isn’t it gross for you? I was just– I was just inside you.”

“You literally just ate me out,” he deadpans, jaw aching and mouth itching to be fucked just as thoroughly as he had just been.

“But I don’t want you to do something you do–”

Kai’s had enough of his torturously drawn-out chit chat and he offers no further preamble before he wraps his lips around Soobin’s length, bobbing his head vigorously and working his tongue on his tip each time he pulls away.

It shouldn’t take long, given how close to completion Soobin had been earlier as he thoroughly plowed his ass.

A string of curses leaves the man’s lips and Kai takes it as a sign of encouragement when Soobin begins to buck his hips into his mouth.

“Kai I’m– I’m gonna–”

He doesn’t back away despite how his lover tries to push his forehead back, grabbing the man’s hips instead and forcing him to come right down his throat in spurts.

Bitterness coats his tongue, but he manages to look up in time to see Soobin with his head lowered and expression blissed out.

Worth it. Worth the risk? Maybe not quite. But definitely worth the ache in his muscles and the hefty cleanup they will have to deal with soon after.

Swallowing all of the other man’s release, Kai pulls away from his spent cock with a pop, though he stays on his knees, letting Soobin open his eyes slowly and visibly milk the sight.

“Take a picture, save it in your head or something,” he croaks out with a laugh, his voice sounding awfully wrecked. “If we don’t get caught and fired this time, I’m not gonna take such a huge risk again.”

Soobin doesn’t seem to mind, dazed as he watches Kai actually rummage through the oaur of pants on the floor to pass the man his phone.

“Wait. Are you serious?”

Kai shrugs. “You have more incriminating content of me on your phone.”

“Right– right yeah.”

Kai keeps still, staring up at the camera with the most innocent eyes he can muster, fully aware that his cum stained cock is laid out bare as Soobin snaps a photo and curses audibly.

His gaze flits between Kai and his phone screen.

“I need to fuck you again when we’re back home.”

Kai rolls his eyes fondly.

“Sure you do.”

-

(The clean-up’s a complete pain in the ass and Kai ends up sneaking out of the supply closet first with a limp because of a less metaphorical pain in his ass. 

The plan is for him to grab his stuff and say goodbye to one of his team members before leaving so Soobin can do the same with some gap in between.

But their flawless plan flies down the drain when he barely makes it past half the cubicles before someone slides out in a swivel chair, blocking his path and scaring him out of his wits.

His heart drops further when the person turns around on the swivel chair in theatrical fashion.

Kai manages a nervous laugh, suddenly hyperaware of how his appearance must still look disheveled despite his attempts to tidy his appearance. “Aha– How was the– How was the dance battle with Woongki?”

Beomgyu’s cheeks are slightly flushed but he still manages to narrow his eyes at Kai and fold his arms while shaking his head.

“I called it from the start. Choi Soobin, you shitty actor.”

“W-What?”

“I knew it was unresolved sexual tension between you both.”

Collective groans resound from behind Beomgyu. 

“Choi Yeonjun, Kang Taehyun, you both owe me 50!”

Kai nearly passes out.)