Chapter Text
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Delia listened to her footsteps as they echoed on the stone steps leading to the front door of Nonnatus. “Just 5 more… 4 more… 3 more… 2 more… last one…” she whispered, exhaling loudly as she finally made it to the landing.
‘Gosh, haven’t counted the steps like that in ages,’ she thought. ‘Not since recovering from the accident…’
The brunette paused before entering, taking a moment to breathe in the cool early morning air. It was just after 4 am. She had walked out the day before at 5:30am for her early shift.
She closed her eyes and inhaled, laughing quietly at her nearly delirious thoughts as she mentally calculated the 21 hour shift. ‘Been a long time since I pulled one of those…’
She opened her eyes and gazed up into the streetlight then blinked, seeing blues and purples blooming on the backs of her eyelids.
Delia heard a crash nearby and startled, turning just in time to see a large rat scampering away from a trash can with something in its mouth. ‘Now that you mention it… I’m hungry too…’ she said as she turned to head into the quiet building. ‘Busby you’re talking to a rat… it’s time for bed…” she thought as she stumbled down the hallway with dry bloodshot eyes, blurry from the strain of focus during the day’s long procedures.
The brunette pushed opened the door to the bedroom she shared with Patsy Mount and smiled, seeing that the older woman had left a bedside lamp on so it wouldn’t be dark when she returned.
Delia dropped her bag by the door, too tired to carry it any further and kicked off her shoes, sighing with relief as she flexed her stocking clad toes in the soft carpet.
She smiled as her eyes fell on the bottle of wine and glass Patsy had left on the table for her. She quietly crossed the room and took off her coat, hanging it on the back of a chair. The exhausted woman uncorked the bottle and poured the deep burgundy liquid into the stemmed glass, accidentally sloshing a good portion of the wine onto the table in her sleep-deprived state.
‘Damn…” she mumbled, crossing to the cabinet to retrieve a towel.
After wiping up the spill Delia considered changing into her pajamas but still felt too uncomfortably wired from her intense shift. She opted to sit on the sofa to drink her nightcap and let her mind and body wind down.
As she sat in silence, letting her head fall back onto the cushions, Delia closed her eyes and took a deep breath, working to release the stress and tension of the day. About two hours into her shift four men had been brought in from the ship yard with catastrophic injuries. All were taken into emergency surgery. One died on the table shortly after arrival, and the others underwent numerous complex life-saving procedures throughout the day. With the skilled work of the surgical teams and the attending nurses, including Delia, the other three young men survived. After the prolonged high stress situation Delia could feel she was experiencing complete sensory overload, and her heart was still pounding from the nerves of it all as the adrenaline wore off. A headache was creeping in as any and all sounds felt too loud and even the way her stockings now rubbed on her legs felt like too much sensory input.
With eyes closed the brunette raised her feet to rest them on the table in front of the sofa, but as she did so, her heel connected with an object. Her eyes shot open just in time to see a large book falling to the floor.
*THUMP*
“Damn” she whispered, leaning forward to pick up the large novel.
“Deels?”
The brunette sighed and turned to see the redhead squinting and looking around.
“Over here Pats, sorry… just knocked a book off the table… go back to sleep sweetheart…”
“What time is it?” Patsy mumbled as she sat up and looked around trying to orient herself.
“4:30 I think…” Delia said, taking the last drink of her wine.
“In the morning?! Did you just get back Deels?!” the redhead said throwing the covers off as she quickly stood then crossed to the sofa.
Delia gave the older woman a small smile and nodded as she looked up with half-mast eyelids.
“You must be exhausted…” Patsy said as she sat down next to the younger woman. “What do you need from me?”
Delia smiled as her eyes met blue eyes full of worry and care. “Nothing at all, love.”
“Well, why aren’t you in bed Deels? You need rest.”
The brunette smiled and put her hand on Patsy’s knee. “I will, they gave me the day off today so I can sleep into the afternoon. I just needed to… decompress.”
“Ahh…” Patsy said, giving the younger woman a knowing nod. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Just a long day… an extremely long day. We got those young men from the ship yard…”
“You were there? I heard about them… awful… Why wasn’t the trauma unit…”
“They needed more hands,” Delia said as she watched Patsy stand and retrieve the wine bottle then return.
“I heard they weren’t likely to survive…” Patsy said as she poured another half glass for the smaller woman.
“They weren’t… one of them didn’t… there was no hope for him really when we arrived… he was… well… he was cut nearly in half…. it was dreadful…” Delia closed her eyes and sighed.
“I’m sorry you had to see that Deels… nothing prepares us for the ones like that,” Patsy said resting her hand on Delia’s.
“No, it doesn’t…. I also wasn’t prepared to be on a surgical team for them for sixteen hours…”
“Sixteen hours!” Patsy said in disbelief. Her eyes scanned her lover with more attention for the first time, and noted a stiffness and an awkward angle that told her Delia was trying to relieve pressure on her previously injured hip. “You must be dreadfully sore from standing for that long…”
“Actually, I’m worried about how little I feel it right now… I think it’s going to hit me now that I finally sat down. But they needed it Pats, I’ve never seen anything like it. All of them were… tore up… ripped open… bones out… so many fractures, punctures, and wounds… one of them has a leg that was crushed so badly it had to be amputate below the knee… nothing prepares the stomach for a sight like that… one of the newer nurse couldn’t stomach it and got sick…one of the other men lost a few fingers… the third had to have a kidney and part of his bowel removed… it was all just awful really… I feel so sorry for the poor lads… they have so much recovery ahead of them… …” Delia finished as her eyes glazed over and she stared blankly at Sister Monica Joan’s armchair across the room.
Patsy could sense that her lover was feeling grief and drawing parallels to her own healing journey after the accident.
“Deels… did it bring anything up about… your experience that you want to talk about?”
Delia’s eyes came back into focus and she looked back to the redhead.
“You know it did,” she said with a small smile. “But it’s alright, it’s all settling pretty quickly in here,” she said, taking the older woman’s hand and bringing it to her own chest to cover her heart. “It’s settling now that I’m back here with you.”
Patsy reached up and brushed dark hair away from blue eyes.
“I watched as it was touch and go with them for much of the day, and I thought of how it had been the same for me… and I thought of how my biggest fear was leaving you… and then seeing that they have injuries that will change their lives forever… it just made me feel so very grateful that I recovered nearly everything… Is that selfish?”
“Selfish? What a silly thing to say Deels,” Patsy said as she reached up and gently moved her thumb across the younger woman’s cheek. “Anyone would desire regaining their strength and mobility the way you did. And they would be just as grateful too. It’s perfectly normal, you just have a heart that hurts when you see pain in others.”
Delia smiled and reached up letting her hand rest on the back of Patsy’s head, then slowly pulled her into a kiss full of deep connection.
“Deels, I know you’re exhausted, but do you think you would be able to rest more deeply if you took a quick bath? Wash away the day and all that.”
The brunette thought for a moment, mentally noting how she did feel almost sticky from being covered head to toe in scrubs in a stuffy surgical theater for hours on end.
“Actually, that might help.”
“I thought so,” Patsy said with a knowing nod.
“I used to feel rather gross after long days in scrubs like that…”
“That’s exactly it!” Delia said with a small laugh. “And a bit claustrophobic from the mask and being near so many people…”
“Ahh, I don’t miss that part one bit,” Patsy said, standing and moving to the window, opening it two inches. “There we go, a bit of air will do you good. We’ll leave it open while you’re in the bath so the room is nice and fresh and cool when you get back.”
Delia smiled and leaned forward, groaning as she attempted to stand. “Oh, gosh…” she said, now feeling the full consequences of twenty one hours on her feet.
“Damn, I’m sorry” Patsy said, as she took the younger woman’s hands and pulled gently. “Up you go…” she added, watching as the brunette winced and worked to stand through stiff and sore joints and muscles. “Now a bath is definitely in order.”
Delia laughed. “If you insist Nurse Mount.”
“I absolutely do.” Patsy said with a wink.