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“I want the truth.” Crow sternly spoke.
“I was kind to you because I wanted to be. Because the truth hurts.” The Witch Queen chided, trapped in her towering crystalline prison. “You know this better than anyone. Shrinking away from the rumors of the man you used to be-”
“I’m not him.”
“How can you say that when you don’t even know who he is?”
Ana bolted after Crow. She ran as fast as she could- as fast as her petite body and the Light within her would let her go. The smell of ozone and wet soil filled her lungs as she panted for air. Even though tears filled her aquamarine eyes, she kept her focus on her dear friend the best she could. Memories of what had happened mere moments ago soared through her mind- soaring faster than her jumpship could even fly. How he found out about the dark truth she and every Guardian had been withholding from him up until this point. How he was so easily tricked into uncovering the worst of his past.
She couldn’t have stopped it, and that’s what hurt her the most. One way or another, her lack of facing what mattered would come back to haunt her. She hoped she could keep his past a secret from him until the time was right, to use the fact that he had a newly resurrected life as a Guardian to make amends. To use his amnesia as leverage and not a burden.
Crow hurriedly rounded the corner ahead of him. His dusty, matte-black cloak flowing directly behind him, giving Ana some sort of lead to trail him. It was no surprise that he came back to the abandoned catacombs all the way in the European Dead Zone, this was his home for the longest time before he had found a new one in the Tower.
This was where he went when he felt alone. Being alone is where he felt at home.
“Crow!! Please, just wait!” Ana yelled. She attempted to focus on the direction of his cloak. He was moving faster than she was. That damn hunter. But she thought that at this rate she could maybe try to-
“Don’t worry… he didn’t feel a thing...”
She just couldn’t get it out of her head. Everything he had done before, everything that she tried to put aside to get to know the Guardian he was growing into. When she avenged Cayde; the exact moment when she pulled the trigger, when the one at the end of the barrel was none other than Crow- at least, the man he used to be. The way his lifeless corpse slumped, how the light in his eyes went out, and the dull satisfaction and apathy she felt when she watched his blood pouring onto the crystalline flooring around her.
Crow would slow down to a complete standstill, refusing to look back at Ana as he did so. He would look down at the mossy concrete beneath him, forming a tight fist to try and stifle his emotions. Betrayal, anger, denial, shock, coursing through his system all at once as his breathing became more erratic.
“Everything I did, I did for HER!”
“The line between Light and Dark is so, very thin. Do you know which side you’re on?”
It was one thing to wrestle with the corrupted monster he was before his resurrection as a Guardian, but it was another to be lied to by his best and, arguably, only friend. He may have gotten what he wanted from The Witch Queen- the memories of who he was- but he sacrificed the one thing holding him together: Ignorance.
“How could you?” He questioned, his voice wavering.
Ana halted. Her chase around the catacombs coming to a complete stop. Her quiet panting echoed around the tunnel as she thought of what she could try to say next. Some kind of remedy. Instead, she could only look at him with shame.
“You… you killed me.” He mumbled, distraught. Tears began to form in his eyes as his clenched fist trembled.
“Crow, please listen. Who he was, who Uldren was, he isn’t you! What I did, how I did it, it wasn’t right, and- and I’m sorry that-“ Ana cried out, trying to explain herself the best she could.
“Sorry?” Crow scoffed.
He would turn back to face Ana, gritting his teeth as tears rolled down his face, “Bullshit. You’re selfish, you know that?!” he shouted. “As the person who murdered me, the least you could have done was come clean!”
The Warlock felt a lump in her throat. She may be strong in a lot of aspects, but confrontation of any kind was not one of these, “I… couldn’t bring myself to…” her voice waivered.
“You couldn’t bother to tell me that you were the one who put me in this position- where I have to watch my back every single day because of that man did? While you pretended to be all chummy with me and lead me into yet another fucking lie?!”
Ana froze, eyes widened. Her hands began to tremble, “I never wanted this! Please, just listen to me. I- I did it for your own good, Crow, so you weren’t burdened by who you were! The past doesn’t define anyone! I thought that if you were a Guardian, then maybe you can have a fresh slate! A life where you could be free!”
“I’ve been surrounded by lies my entire life, Ana, and I trusted you!”
Ana’s heart sank hearing how distraught he was. His pain, his sorrow. She slowly walked over to the Hunter, taking notice to how his trembling hands moved to ruffle through his hair. He had a habit of doing that when he was stressed.
“Crow?” she questioned, reaching a hesitant hand out to touch his shoulder as a gesture of comfort.
Crow harshly shoved her away from him. A mix of ire and sorrow swam in his orange eyes as he finally brought himself to look directly at the woman in front of him. All he wanted was to be left alone. Why did she have to look at him with those eyes? The very last thing he saw before she shot him dead?
“Ana… go.” He croaked, stifling a sob, “Please…”
Deep down, Crow didn’t want her to leave. He was terrified of her abandoning him upon realizing who he was. She was his only friend. She was first Guardian who didn’t kill him on sight because of whose face he wore, and who instead took the time to get to know the person he currently is. She introduced him to the rest of her fireteam, to her lover, with no prejudice against him whatsoever. Why would he want to cast himself away?
Then again- what horrible person like him deserved these things? Who was he to receive kindness after the pain he had caused?
The two Awoken stared at each other, sharing a moment of tense air. Ana wanted to say so many things to him, to hug him and to tell him how sorry she was, for things to go back to the way they were. But she felt trapped. Claustrophobic. A simple “Sorry” would not fix the size of the problem that had just unfolded in front of them both. She felt as though she was chained to the bottom of the ocean, helplessly kicking in hopes of reaching the top.
Crow slowly turned away, averting his eyes to the cracked concrete just underneath him as he quietly began to sob, “Don’t… follow me.” He said quietly, his voice cracking as he brought his arms to his sides. Clenching his fists once more. “Having me here is more pain than what you deserve.”
He finally continued his descent into the tunnels, quickly returning to his old hideout before he could fully break down into a full sob. Leaving his only friend paralyzed, unable to do anything. Leaving his false home behind. To be where he belongs.
To be at home.
To be alone.