Work Text:
Izzy is fixing a rope with all the grace of a man trying to strangle it to death. His hands move fast, jerky, yanking the knot tight with unnecessary force. The rope creaks in protest. The crew watches from a cautious distance.
"He's mad about something," Archie murmurs.
"When isn’t he mad?" Roach whispers back.
"No, this is different," Jim says, arms crossed. "He's extra mad. And he's taking it out on that fucking rope."
"Maybe Stede did something again," Olu suggests. "Oh, maybe he tried to give him another promotion or something." They snicker, remembering the last time that happened.
"It's been two days since that happened, though," Roach points out. "What could he have done to set him off since?"
Before anyone can speculate further, the cabin door swings open, and Lucius steps out, his movements controlled and purposeful, and though he doesn’t so much as glance in Izzy’s direction, the tension between them crackles in the air like a lit fuse.
He doesn’t look at anyone, just heads straight for the rail, sketchbook tucked under his arm. When he reaches his usual spot, he flips it open and starts sketching with a little too much force. His quill scratches at the page, sharp and clipped.
"Lucius is mad too," Frenchie says. "Look."
"Yeah, something's up," Olu says.
The crew watches them in silence. Izzy is still manhandling the rope, and Lucius is drawing, both with far more vigor than strictly necessary. They're pointedly ignoring each other.
"What should we do?" Frenchie asks.
"About what?" Stede asks, utterly lost. The crew startles. "Is everything alright? Why's everyone standing around like this?" The crew exchanges glances, none of them sure how to break it to Stede without just coming out and saying it.
"Lucius and Izzy," Archie says slowly, as if the words themselves might cause the explosion. "Are fighting." Stede looks from one to the other, his brow furrowing.
"Fighting?" He sounds politely intrigued, head tilted to one side. "How can you tell?"
"Do we really have to explain it?" Wee John asks, crossing his arms. "They're acting like—" He gestures vaguely between Izzy, who’s still aggressively wrestling with the rope, and Lucius, whose quill is tearing through the pages of his sketchbook. "Like that."
"I'm not acting any differently to how I always act." Lucius snaps, jabbing his quill into the inkwell so hard it nearly tips over. The crew startle at being caught gossiping. "It's not my fault that some people—" he glares pointedly at Izzy, "—are so emotionally constipated they can't deal with a single goddamn feeling."
"Oh dear," Stede says. "Should we, uh, maybe intervene? Resolve it before things escalate?"
"You can try," Olu says, shrugging. "I'm not getting in the middle of it. Not unless they start throwing knives."
"It's a shame," Stede sighs. "They make such a nice couple. I hope they can figure it out soon." The crew stare at him. Stede blinks back. "What? Why are you all staring at me?"
"They're not a couple," Olu says. Stede makes a face. "Why'd you think they were a couple?"
"Because they are," Stede says. The crew stares at their captain as if he’s just spoken in a completely different language, and for a long, awkward moment, no one knows how to respond.
“What?" Olu's eyes narrow. "No, they’re not. They’re—” He gestures again between Lucius and Izzy, but now with less confidence, as if he’s questioning her own assessment of the situation. "They're not. They're definitely not."
"They are." He repeats, knowingly. It would seem he’s been privy to some secret, easily understood by anyone who knows Izzy well enough. "They have been for at least a month, if not longer. They're very discreet, I'll admit. But, they're definitely a couple."
“Are you—seriously?” Jim asks, their voice rising in disbelief. “How do you know that? How can you tell?”
“I just...know.” Stede watches Izzy for a beat longer, the way his shoulders are rigid, the clenched jaw, the tension radiating off him like a storm waiting to happen.
Izzy is less subtle than he thinks, and Stede can see the way his hands tremble ever so slightly when he’s near Lucius, his eyes linger a bit too long, and when the two of them aren’t fighting, there’s something in the air around them that can’t be ignored.
The crew falls silent at Stede’s calm declaration, unsure whether to be impressed by his insight or just bewildered by the revelation itself.
"But, they're always yelling at each other," Olu protests, sounding almost betrayed. "How can you yell at someone you're in a relationship with? It's like, rule number one, don't yell at the person you're dating."
"It's Izzy." Stede says simply, as if that explains everything. Olu supposes it does.
“You’re telling me,” Archie says slowly, “that they’ve been together this whole time? And we just—just missed it?”
“I wouldn’t say you missed it." Stede chuckles softly. "More like you wouldn't know if Izzy didn't want you to."
"And he wanted you to know?" Wee John asks, incredulous.
"God, no." Stede's chuckle turns into a full laugh. "Izzy doesn’t want anyone to know. But sometimes, when you care about someone, you just know."
The crew considers his words, turning back to watch their First Mate and Lucius. Now that the secret is out, the signs are impossible to miss, and they stare with wonder, trying to pick out the moments that have slipped under their noses all this time.
"You know what this means, right?" Frenchie says after a while, and the crew exchange conspiratorial grins.
"I'm not sure I want to," Jim mutters, but the glint in their eye betrays them.
"We're gonna have to fix this," Frenchie says.
"How are we gonna do that?" Olu asks, frowning. "I mean, they're not talking. And even if they were, we can't just force them to make up. That's not how relationships work."
"I can." Stede announces confidently. The crew stares at him, not quite sure they heard correctly.
"Captain," Archie says. "I know you're supposed to be good with people or whatever, but this is a lot even for you. You can't just—"
"Watch me." Stede pushes off the railing, a new spring in his step, and heads over to where Izzy is still working the knots on the rope, looking more and more like he's imagining it's someone's neck. "Ah, Izzy. Come please." Izzy grits his teeth, glaring down at the rope in his hands before dropping it.
"Yes, Captain," he says tightly. He follows Stede, shooting daggers at anyone who looks at him. The crew are quick to disperse, and Lucius' furious scribbling pauses only when he glances up to watch Izzy and Stede pass him.
"You too, Lucius!" Stede calls, and Lucius rolls his eyes, snapping his book shut and tucking it under his arm as he gets to his feet.
"Of course," he mutters, trudging behind the rest.
Stede leads them both into the Captain's cabin and closes the door. Izzy and Lucius glare at each other, standing as far away from each other as the room allows.
"Okay, so." Stede clears his throat. "I don't want to overstep, and this is entirely your business, but... the two of you have been a bit..." He looks back and forth between them, and Lucius rolls his eyes, arms crossed. Izzy looks like he's seconds away from ripping someone's throat out. "Unpleasant to be around." Stede finishes, his smile forced and strained. "I'd like you to squash whatever this is right here and now." Izzy's eye twitches. "Now." Stede adds, clapping his hands. "Please."
"We have nothing to discuss." Izzy spits out, his voice low and venomous.
"Yeah," Lucius sneers. "Nothing." Izzy balls his hands into fists at his side and Stede holds up his hands in an attempt to de-escalate the situation, though it’s clear it’s already past that point.
“Okay, okay, I get it. You’re both angry. But—” He looks between them, his face still smiling but visibly straining to maintain some semblance of peace. “Listen, we’re a crew, a family, and family argues, sure, but we also need to be able to talk things through.”
“Talk things through?” Izzy repeats bitterly. “You think we haven’t tried that?” He gestures toward Lucius, his jaw clenched tightly. “Every time I try to talk, he just—” He cuts off with a frustrated growl, his hands curling into fists at his sides.
“Me?” Lucius scoffs, the corners of his mouth curling in disdain. “You’re the one who can’t be bothered to talk to anyone. And when you do, it’s like you’re talking to a fucking wall, not a real person. So, no, we haven't talked. Because there's no talking to you. Ever."
Izzy glares back, and the air between them crackles with anger, and something else, something that might have once been affection, or at the very least attraction, and which has since soured and turned bitter.
Stede stands there, watching the two of them, the silence growing heavy, and he clears his throat, hoping to cut through the tension.
"Okay, so, maybe talking isn't going to work." Stede tries, still forcing a smile, though the corners are starting to wobble. "Perhaps the two of you should try—you know."
He wiggles his eyebrows meaningfully, and the two of them blink back, not comprehending. Stede sighs, rolling his eyes.
"You know, a little kiss and make up?" He says, and the two of them stare blankly at him, and then at each other, and then back at him. "Come on, surely you must know that a kiss is supposed to make things better, right? That's a thing." He looks from Izzy to Lucius. "It is a thing, isn't it?"
"You can't be serious." Lucius says.
"No, it's true," Stede says, nodding. "Just the other day, when Ed and I—" He trails off, his ears turning red. "Anyway. What I'm saying is, a little kiss can go a long way. Especially with your partner. Right, Izzy?"
Izzy looks like he's torn between strangling Stede and just walking straight out the door and jumping overboard, never to be seen again.
"So," Stede says, clasping his hands together. "You two should have a kiss. That should make everything better, shouldn't it?" He smiles expectantly, and Izzy and Lucius look like they're having a silent battle, trying to out-stubborn each other. "Come on," Stede encourages.
Izzy’s eye twitches, his jaw clenching tighter with every word that leaves Stede’s mouth. He glances at Lucius, then back at Stede, his lips curling into a sarcastic smile.
"You're serious about this?" Izzy asks, his voice dripping with incredulity. "You think one little kiss is going to fix this?" He gestures wildly between himself and Lucius, his voice rising with frustration.
"It can't possibly make things worse, can it?" His gaze flicks between Izzy and Lucius. "The tension’s been building between you two for ages, and I just thought, maybe...a little intimacy could help."
Izzy stares, speechless, as if he can't believe what he's hearing, and neither can Lucius, who is shaking his head, his mouth pressed into a tight, thin line.
"You can't honestly be considering this," Izzy says. "He's out of his fucking mind." This is said to Lucius, who looks back at him with a mixture of annoyance and amusement.
"I've learned to expect the unexpected with the Captain," Lucius says. He sounds annoyed, but not surprised, and when he glances at Stede, there's a fondness there that Izzy recognizes all too well. "Can't hurt. Unless you're scared," Lucius adds, raising an eyebrow and crossing his arms.
Izzy stares back at him, his eyes narrowed. He doesn't rise to the bait, but Stede can tell he's mulling it over, and so is Lucius, who seems to have resigned himself to the fact that, somehow, some way, Stede's going to get what he wants.
"Fine," Izzy says after a moment. "We'll do this. But just to get him off our backs." Lucius huffs out a small laugh. Before Stede can blink, Izzy's closed the distance between them, and he grabs Lucius by the shirt and hauls him close, crashing their lips together.
Lucius makes a small, muffled noise, and Izzy pushes closer, one hand curling around the back of Lucius' neck. It's a rough, violent kiss, more of a battle than a sign of affection, but after a beat, the tension melts out of their shoulders, and they melt into each other, kissing back just as fiercely.
Stede watches the scene unfold before him with an unabashed glee, but then Lucius pulls Izzy's shirt open, scattering the buttons across the floor, and his smile fades into something else, something that borders on uncomfortable.
"Ah." Stede clears his throat. "Well, it would seem everything is...settled, so, um—"
Lucius and Izzy pay him no mind, lost in each other. The room is filled with the sound of fabric ripping, and they're kissing and tearing at each other's clothes, and Stede doesn't really know where to look or what to do, so he turns away, heading for the door, his cheeks a bright, vivid pink.
Outside, the crew are huddled around the door, doing their best to eavesdrop on the proceedings inside. When the door opens, they all jump back, pretending they weren't listening in, and Stede's blush deepens when he spots the crew loitering outside.
"It's all sorted," Stede announces, clearing his throat. He can't meet anyone's eyes, so he focuses on the horizon instead, and the crew trade glances, not quite sure whether they believe him.
"Is it really?" Roach asks, and Stede nods vigorously.
"Completely," he assures them. "Everything's great. No more arguing, no more tension. Everything is, uh, fine." He smiles brightly, and the crew glance at each other, a silent conversation passing between them. A warbling sort of cry comes from the cabin, and they all jump. "See?" Stede's smile wavers. "Everything's fine." Another cry, louder this time, and Stede clears his throat. "I think I hear Edward calling, so I'll just—" He hurries away, and the crew watch him go, before turning to the cabin.
"Should we go check on them?" Frenchie asks, eyeing the cabin door.
"Nah." Wee John shakes his head. "They're fine."
"Are you sure?" Frenchie looks at the door again, listening. "That didn't sound very fine."
"If we go in there," Archie says, "we're probably going to end up traumatized." Another cry echoes from inside, followed by a string of profanity, and the crew exchange grimaces. "Yeah. Definitely traumatized."
"Let's give them some privacy," Olu says, clapping a hand on Frenchie's shoulder and steering him away. The others follow suit, moving about their business.
When Lucius and Izzy finally emerge, there's a hush that falls over the crew, and they watch the pair carefully. The two of them are disheveled, hair mussed and clothing rumpled. They look like they've been in a fight.
Izzy's collar is torn, and the buttons of his shirt are missing. Lucius' shirt is untucked and stained, and his sleeves are rolled up, his collar stretched and crooked.
They walk together, their shoulders brushing, and as the crew watch, Lucius bumps Izzy's shoulder, and Izzy returns the gesture, knocking their elbows together.
Lucius' hand slides down to the small of Izzy's back, and their fingers tangle together, and Izzy squeezes his hand, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. The crew watch in fascination, and when the pair spot the others staring, Lucius raises an eyebrow, and Izzy shoots them a look that dares them to say a word.
The crew don't dare.