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"Mmmm, mmmm, MMMM~!"
"My GLORIOUS overlord. I am honoured to be in your presence once more.~"
Out of the giant door, 3 (almost nude) 9 foot tall people came out, wearing nothing but a helmet and a loincloth. Despite there not being any wind, the cloths still somehow managed to flow in the non-existent wind.
The one who spoke first had a large blade sticking out of his arm. A tattoo of Momonga himself covered his left arm.
...
...
...
WHY THE HELL ARE THEY NAKED!!?!?!?!
I NEVER ASKED THEM TO BE NAKED!!!!
WHY ARE THEY NAKED?!?!?!
"It truly has been too long, my Lord."
The second one to speak had odd patches of black leather across his body, all of these patches seemed to be sewn onto the skin. Two of these leather pads covered his shoulders and two more covered his chest area.
"My oiled abs QUIVER at your voice!~"
The third and final member of this nude trio had 6 large rings around the wrists of both hands, a blade could be seen jutting out of both.
WHY. ARE. THEY. NAKED?!?!
"You DARE speak to our lord dressed in nothing but a cloth?! You should be asha-"
"You."
Albedo tries to speak out against this display in front of her, but the one with the tattoo closes the distance between them almost instantly.
I couldn't even react to this nude beings movements! Just how fast is he?!
"We haven't been able to properly meet yet, floor guardian..."
"What is your name?"
Despite the danger this being oozes, Albedo tries answering in a calm manner.
"M-My name is Alb-"
"You know, boys. She's such a sweet looking thing, isn't she?" The one with leathery patches across his skin starts speaking to his comrades.
"How about the name..."
"Little kitten?~~"
"Oooh my..." The one with the blades joins in.
"She does look like a little bottom, doesn't she?~"
"..."
"YOU..."
Any fears that Albedo had for these beings vanished as soon as she heard those words come out of that things mouth.
She clutches her fists, prepared to bash this insolent beings skull in for DARING to call her a-
"Everyone, please. Let's calm down here." Momonga puts a hand on Albedo's shoulder, snapping her out of this newfound rage.
"Albedo, they are simply joking, nothing more. Stand down."
"Tch..." Albedo calms down, if only slightly.
"And you three, knock it off with the names."
"This is exactly the reason why I sealed you all away in the first place..."
"Oh my deepest apologies, my lord! I did not mean for any disrespect!" The one with the tattoo speaks out before bowing, the other two follow suit.
"I was just introducing myself to some new guests, or rather..."
"Some fresh meat~"
Albedo and Yuri Alpha look at the bowing nudist, looking completely disgusted.
"But fine, I suppose we shall introduce ourselves in a more... "normal" manner..."
"I am Karstodes, one of the three Custodes made by Lord Momonga." The nudist with the tattoo introduces himself, he stops bowing and strikes a pose.
"I am Wamuudes, one of the three Custodes made by Lord Momonga." The one with the blades gets up and does a similar pose to Karstodes.
"I am Custodisi, one of the three Custodes made by Lord Momonga." The third and final nudist introduces himself. He, of course, poses as well.
"And all three of us are subservient to you and only you."
"Our master.~"
All three Custodes say in unison as they pose, almost emitting a blinding light by the shine of their abs alone.
...
why did I make these guys...
"And speaking of our subservience to you..." Karstodes asks, while still posing.
"How about one of your other companions decided to care for you instead of little kitten over there? I'm sure one of us could do the job of serving you much better than she could."
"Perhaps I could be your new companion? I do remember you being quite fond of me because of our battles in Yggdrasil. I used to mow down hoards of enemies by myself, as I'm sure you can recall.~"
"I mean... I believe my comrades, the other supreme beings doing most of the damage, but whatever you say..."
"Oooh! Oooh! I remember during one of your great battles, you were fighting this mountain sized golem, and you stepped on me as a boost to get closer to it's head! You blew it away with one of your amazing spells! It was such a sight..." Custodisi exclaims, incredibly giddy as he does so.
"I didn't even use you for a boost... You were simply in the way and you just so happened to knock into me... I used a fly spell to get up there."
"Why would I need to jump off your head?"
"Oh... umm... uhh..." Custodisi stops posing, his arms go limp at his side.
"You all have strength, I am not denying that."
"But I cannot recall a single thing you three have done that were of any significance..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
The three Custodes look at Ainz, stopping their poses entirely.
A collective "Oh..." is shared amongst all three of them as they hang their heads low.
"But... I am giving you a chance to prove yourselves..."
All three Custodes immediately look back at Ainz as a gasp is heard coming out of the trio.
"O-Of course! My master! We will not disappoint!" Karstodes bows down.
"We will make sure to punish any who've wronged you..." Custodisi bows down.
"No one shall escape my well oiled abs!" Wamudees bows down.
"G-Good, that's good, very good..."
Ohmygodjustputsomeclothesonalready-
"Before you do anything though, please put on some kind of clothing... a loincloth is hardly the proper attire for beings such as yourselves..."
"Right away, master!" All three Custodes shout as they make their way back into the darkness on the other side of the door.
"..."
"..."
"...I can see why you... kept them away from the rest of us... Lord Ainz..."
"Yes... well... desperate times call for desperate measures..."
...
This is going to end terribly...
