Chapter Text
𝄞 November, 12th.
Wednesday.
12.11 a.m.
Dear diary,
I've always been super unlucky.
'Maybe you are destined to be unlucky,' they say. 'Perhaps you're making your own bad luck.' If that's the case, wouldn't I be able to create good fortune for myself too?
I did, though, telling myself to stay positive. Not allowing myself to feel down because of my luck.
But everything changed on that day...
That day... fire. Fire was everywhere. I didn't quite remember. It was night, but the flames shone prettier than the moon. A house... was on fire.
But whose house is it...?
"Akito, it's fine. Your sister is here. We will be fine," a young, brunette girl embraced me. She was crying, but she smiled, probably to reassure that everything would be fine for her. For us.
"Mom and Dad said that we will be alright. So don't blame yourself, okay?" Blame myself... for what?
Did my luck just do this?
Did I set the house on fire?
All of the questions were left unanswered. I barely remember what happened after that. There were too many people. The noise is unbearable. Perhaps this is what drives me to tend to ignore things.
Then, I stopped going to school.
Everyone's eyes never leave me at ease. They were bothering me so much. I hate, despised dislike it. Why did they look at me like that? Did I do something wrong?
"Shino- Shiraishi, it's nice to meet you again. This is our-"
"-Our second session. Yes, I know that, sensei." I met a teacher- the school counselor, who heavily convinced me to see him after class and said that I need help after living with adoptive parents.
They have a daughter, named An. She was just 5 months older than me, but she already called herself a big sister. The parents- Shiraishi Ken and Shiraishi Yuka, took me and nee-chan in their care.
"Shiraishi mommy... I want to quit school."
Shiraishi Yuka was shocked. Well... not only her, but others too. Nee-chan knows exactly why, but since they didn't pry for further details, I did not tell the actual reason to them.
Shiraishi Ken, however, did not agree. He said education is important. Yet I don't have the hope to study when my grades fall so bad. But after a few days, he gives me another option. Which is, homeschooling.
I've never accepted an offer so fast in my life.
To me, learning from home sucks. But it's better than going outside. An once joked about me looked like a vampire because I basically prevents to go outside. Nee-chan, on the other hand, loves going to school.
Of course... she has many friends.
The most important part is that her good luck is insane.
No matter how hard I try, I will never be as good as her. Clever, creative, talented... I'm just living in her shadow. The gap between us is wider than my empty heart. It's meaningless. It doesn't worth it.
Why am I even alive?
I was starting to lose hope... but then. But just then... a song. A song that I've never heard before, displayed on the TV screen. It was nothing like nee-chan's music practice.
"Geez... Did An forget to switch off the TV? Seriously... and it was kind of loud too..." On the screen, where the loud music was being played, attracts my attention when a girl my age was singing together with a... A hologram girl...?
I was about to turn it off, but-
"Hello, everyone! Hoshika's here today!" The girl, presumably my age, brightly smiles at the camera. "Meet my lovely partner; Hatsune Miku!" Her little hands politely gesture over the hologram girl.
They happily chat, like it was normal to talk with a hologram artificial intelligence.
"Thank you for listening to my first solo with Miku-chan today. I'm a little nervous... But I am glad it turned out well!" The girl with dark blue hair says - named Hoshika. She was nervous...? But her performance feels like it's beyond a beginner...! She was born with talent. Probably good fortune too...
And the song.
It was so good. It makes my body move automatically with the music.
I wanted to dance and sing like that too... But knowing my luck, I... would never stand on a stage. The last time I did, I tripped over the wires, and they strangled. Somehow, it also broke. I don't know why.
Forget it. Even if I work hard and do my best, my luck always does the worst. I'm just gonna end up-
"-After all, you can't have a better tomorrow if you keep thinking about yesterday, right?"
Huh?
"There's no such thing as bad luck! It exists because we believe in it. So, just trust yourself and step forward. A good day will be waiting for you!"
...To be honest, I can't either laugh or feel sad hearing this.
Everything seems to be easy after her words engraved in my mind. Leave yesterday and believe in tomorrow... What a childish naive thinking.
But I can understand why that makes her shine the brightest.
Being simple-minded and happy in what you do... is not an easy task. Her mentality is stronger than the kids of my age. She's possibly an older sister or something... but that was absurd too. Nee-chan's mind is probably different than this Hoshika girl's thinking.
"This is my wish... a hope that I wanted to deliver to everyone."
Working hard without giving up... that 'someday'. Will it be a good day for me? Is it really that simple to think of...?
Regardless, considering here and there. Following Hoshika's official account on NicoNico Douga's application... her songs give me motivation to start turning my bad days into brighter ones.
"I wish... I could spread hope too."
Thus, I decided to try my best from that day.
Goodluck, me.
ɑꮶıꞇᴏ