Chapter Text
Felix covers his face with his arms- anything to avoid looking Chan in the eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Chris, but I just-” Felix gasps, “-I just don’t feel the same, I’m sorry. I am so sorry.”
He tries to suppress a choked sob. And god, Felix, you dumb fucking cunt, why the fuck are you crying? The last thing Chan needs to deal with after being rejected is trying to make you feel better.
But Felix can’t help it. After a perfect day wandering Sydney with Chan- just taking in the sights and basking in a comfort that made Felix feel more at home than he ever had in his actual home- the idea of then saying no to Chan went against every instinct, every fibre of his body.
He can’t stop the tears that are already falling.
“No, Felix! Please don’t apologise and please don’t cry-”
“-But Hyung-”
“No, Felix, I’ll be alright.” Chan gently pulls down the arm covering Felix’s face so that he can meet his eyes.
“This was just something I had to get off my chest. You know I can’t lie- and now that I’ve said it, I’m good! I’ve got my answer!” Chan stares into Felix’s red-rimmed eyes, “Trust me, I’ll be okay.”
And trust Chan to push his feelings aside and focus on reassuring Felix.
“You promise?”
“Of course, Lixie. I’m sorry your dumb hyung had to go and put you in this situation.”
“Hey, don’t call my favourite person dumb!” Felix’s sobs decrease to light sniffles, and Chan doesn’t reply. He only laughs back, a soft smile on his face.
It doesn't escape Felix that, for the first time, he cried in front of Chan and wasn’t immediately met with his warm embrace. He reassured Felix and gave him a warm smile, but his arms had remained firmly plastered to his side.
Felix wipes his eyes, careful and quick, hoping Chan thinks he’s just drying the last of his tears. Because if Chan knew more were coming- knew how much this was hurting Felix- he might try to fix it. And Felix couldn’t let him do that. Not right now.