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There were two conditions for Kyungsoo to dance like that: 1) he had to be drunk, and 2) he had to be forced by you.
And it had to be you. He wouldn't dance with anybody else, nor would he accept anyone's attempts to threaten or bribe him into dancing. God knew how insistent Baekhyun and Chanyeol could get sometimes, and yet they'd never managed to make him dance if Kyungsoo refused. Only you held such a power over him. Tonight, more than ever.
Tonight was you and Kyungsoo’s graduation party.
Four years of cooking school, both long and short at the same time, seemed to only have led to this. One single night. One boring ceremony. One neverending dance with you.
You.
Kyungsoo’s heart was beating in his ears to the booming rhythm of the music, his ribcage vibrating with every beat. His body felt numb due to the alcohol, but it did so in that comfortable way that happened sometimes, when all of his anxieties and inhibitions disappeared. Everything was spinning around him. And you... you looked beautiful. Radiant. The colored flashing lights of the club were casting dreamy shades of red, purple and blue on your body, on your red sequined dress that sparkled as you danced and twirled to the rhythm of the music. With each spin, your fluffy locks freed themselves further from your elegant hairdo. Among swirls of color, he saw your flushed cheeks, radiant with happiness and inebriation, and your toothy smile, directed at him. The sight never failed to take his breath away.
He didn't want that moment to end. In fact, he wished he never had to graduate.
If only he could go to class again next Monday, he’d do it very gladly. He’d spend the entire morning sending you funny tweets instead of paying attention to the professor, then he would have lunch with you, and maybe go for a walk or run some errands together later. And he would do it all again on Tuesday.
He was perfectly content with the way his life had been for the past four years. He had no desire to change a single thing about it. But life was a cruel thing.
Under different circumstances, he would be looking forward to his immediate future and all the plans he had for his parents' restaurant: renovations, new menus, new uniforms… Even the endless arguments with his dad to let him take control of the restaurant would bring him joy and excitement had things happened differently.
Your immediate future, on the other hand… he was a little less excited about it.
He couldn’t help it, no matter how many times he told himself he was a terrible friend for not being happier for you. You deserved the opportunity more than anyone: you had worked harder than anyone, you were extremely talented and you were more than qualified. You had been so excited about it for the past couple months, ever since you had broken the news to him: your application for the internship had been accepted. You were going to spend the next six months working at a Michelin 1-star hotel in France. That was, on the other side of the globe.
You would come back, though. That was what he’d been telling himself for the past couple of months. Unless you were offered a permanent position in that restaurant, in which case you would be stupid if you didn’t accept.
Kyungsoo knew the kind of practices that were common currency in the culinary business in Korea, and he didn’t have any reason to believe it wasn’t the same abroad: restaurant owners would hire underpaid interns for short periods of time, until their contracts ended, and then hired new ones, which yielded more profits than keeping long-time workers with better conditions.
Perhaps he was already on his way to become a great businessman one day, Kyungsoo thought, the bitterness in the back of his throat becoming increasingly difficult to tell apart from the taste of the many beers he’d had that night. He might not be greedy about money, but he was surely becoming more and more greedy about you.
It was already late into the night. The party was about to end and you were clinging to his shoulders as you both swayed together, side to side, to the beat of one of those nostalgic ballads clubs play when they're about to close down.
You were looking disheveled, to say the least. Barefoot, your high heels hanging from your fingers, your long hair cascading down your back, your makeup long ago melted.
Having you so close in his arms like this, your body pressed against his, never failed to send Kyungsoo’s mind into a frenzy. He could not help imagining himself kissing you under the flashing colored lights, like it often happened in his dreams. His heart felt swollen with affection as he took in each and every one of your features: your tousled hair, your lively eyes, your dark eyelashes, your sensual mouth…
Sometimes it felt like a person as beautiful as you deserved, at the very least, to know the effect you had on him.
“I think I’m in love with you.”
He didn’t even hear himself speak those words aloud, thanks to the loud music, but he still anxiously watched your face, looking for any reaction, a tiny part of him hoping you had actually heard him. You turned your ear towards his mouth.
“What?!” You asked.
He felt a chill down his spine, and he instantly chickened out..
“I said I think I’m gonna go get some juice!”
He really couldn’t be lamer if he tried. You frowned at him.
“Juice?!”
“Yeah!” Kyungsoo held up his empty beer bottle. “I’m thirsty!” He stuttered.
Ah, saying it aloud had felt right, Kyungsoo thought, on his way to the bar. Right and thrilling. But it had done nothing to subdue the desperate impulse in his chest that pushed him to act, to hold you close and beg you not to leave, and to confess his feelings on top of it all, without a single care about the outcome.
But he wasn’t only a coward. There was also no way he could hit you with a bomb like that when you were leaving in a couple of days. If he did, what would happen afterwards?
Yes, there were many chances you would come back, but who could know that for sure? Besides, even if you did come back, what would that mean for you two? Would you just be in a long distance relationship until you returned, during God-knows-how-many months? Right, because those worked out perfectly every time, especially when one half of the couple was an attractive young woman in a foreing country that was famous for the romantic atmosphere of its capital city and the captivating lull of its native language... The mere thought of it brought a bitter laugh to his throat.
No. No, there was no way he could confess. It was better to just leave things as they were.
"Wow, this was really the last time we partied together as college students, huh..."
You were standing by your dorm room, with a tired smile on your eyes, after taking an uber home. You were looking keen to go to bed, although he knew very well you would stay up checking the night’s pictures and posting on Instagram for at least half an hour before you actually went to sleep.
"Oh, shut up.” He sighed.
Yet you grinned, and Kyungsoo could tell you weren’t just about to drop the topic. He knew there was something in his usually calm demeanor and stern-looking expression that made people take joy in annoying him more often than not. You were no exception. Jabbing your finger into his ribs, you asked:
"Do you ever think about the fact that one time, years ago, when you were a little kid, you took your toys or your football or your bike home from the park and you never came back? Like, at some point in your life you just stopped playing. You played with your friends for the last time and you never knew it was the last time. How fucked up is that?"
You were such a chatty drunk, he thought, your inebriated ranting deeply unpleasant for a change. He usually loved your silly antics, but tonight he couldn’t find them even a little bit amusing.
"Oh my God!” You suddenly said, looking at your phone. “It’s so freaking late! And I haven’t even started packing! I need to wake up early tomorrow, I have so much to do…"
You were such a chatty drunk, he thought, again, and he was a shitty friend. You continued talking as you slipped your key into the keyhole to your room door, then opened the door and turned to Kyungsoo.
He was leaning on the wall, right next to you, looking intently at the very thin straps of your dress and the softness of your breasts underneath. He had stopped listening a couple of seconds ago, his mind focused only on stupid, drunken thoughts. Forbidden thoughts that he only allowed himself to think about when he was far enough beyond the tipsy stage. Thoughts about you and the many ways he could explain away his behavior were he ever to kiss you.
He had never found a good enough explanation. There was none. Nothing could explain the butterflies in the stomach, the trembling hands, the sleepless nights, the irrepressible urge to press you against the wall and hold you and make you understand once and for all how much you meant to him.
“Good night, Dudu .” You said. “I’ll see you tomorrow at lunch, I guess.”
He snapped out of his daydreaming at the sound of the affectionate nickname. It had been years since the last time you’d called him that.
“Dudu...?” He repeated, dumbly.
He looked at you. You had a sweet smile on your face. It pained him. He was missing you, already.
There must have been a loose wire in his head. Something must have gone wrong, and terribly so, because all of a sudden, Kyungsoo stopped thinking.
Instead, his hands reached for your face.
You shut up at once. The silence was deafening, but Kyunsgoo still wasn’t thinking. He pushed you into the room. Time stopped.
Then, he brought his lips to yours, and kissed you. And he still wasn’t thinking. In his mind there was only fuzzy static. A pleasurable thrill of excitement ran down his spine.
You were warm, and soft. Your taste was intoxicating. It was driving him insane. He started dropping kisses down the delicate, even warmer, skin on your neck. Yet you weren’t really moving, or reciprocating, your arms hanging limp at your sides as you let yourself be kissed and nothing more.
A stinging, dark feeling started to creep slowly, slowly, deep inside his chest. He had to let you go. This wasn't right. God, he was a piece of shit. Why couldn't he have you? He held you closer against him.
He wasn’t ready to stop just yet. No. He couldn't break this magical moment, he couldn’t just shatter the only hint of wonderful hope he'd ever felt. Not yet. Just a little bit longer. Please. Only one more kiss.
He thought he felt his breath halt in his chest the moment you pulled your mouth away from him. Maybe it was just his foggy brain, but you were looking at him with an indecipherable expression on your face, so it felt like he was hallucinating when your lips started to come closer to his on their own.
He was the one frozen for half a second this time. What was going on? Was he still forcing himself on you? Or were you truly reciprocating?
A hand on his back, pressing him closer to your body, gave him the answer, and he felt his legs almost falter.
No way.
You weren’t just kissing him back, you were pulling him closer! He could feel your soft breasts, the entire outline of your body, your everything on him. In the pit of his stomach, the bitterness instantly dissolved and turned into burning fire that consumed him. His heart was racing. Yes. Yes!
Finally. After so many years. You were accepting him.
He held you firmly against him, one hand on your waist, the other brushing against your ribs.
You giggled. You sounded like an angel when you whispered against his lips:
“ Dudu , what has gotten into you?”
But this wouldn’t go anywhere, he reminded himself, when he felt your hands pulling on his very short hair. This won’t go anywhere, he repeated, in his mind, as he pushed you onto your bed until the back of your knees hit the mattress and you both fell on it, him hovering over you.
Just a one-time thing, the result of a frenzied night, filled with exhilaration from your recent graduation. A consolation prize.
Kyungsoo almost couldn’t recognize the sultry look in your eyes, so foreign directed at himself for the very first time. He couldn’t almost believe those were actually your fingers unbuttoning his shirt. It took him a little while to react. Then, as quickly as possible, his hands flew to your breasts and started fondling them, soon slipping under your dress. They were just as soft as he'd imagined them. God, every bit of you was wonderful.
You moaned softly at the first touch of his fingers on your bare skin. The sound instantly rendered him speechless. He really was going to get to experience this with you. He really was this lucky.
He pulled the thin straps of your dress down your shoulders, the sparkly red fabric gathering around your waist, and marveled at the sight. Your skin was covered in pleasured goosebumps. You were fidgety under him, like you couldn’t wait for him to touch you again. Did you have any idea how badly he wanted to touch you too? How impatient the sight of you made him?
Kyungsoo kept silent as he dragged his plush lips across your skin, pressing soft kisses to every bit of your body, pushing you further into the mattress, and then he slid his hands up your legs, moving the rest of your dress out of the way. He hooked his fingers under the lace of your panties and looked at you, questioningly. Was this too fast?
You gave him a reassuring nod, and he continued pulling your underwear down your legs. He unknowingly licked his lips when he looked upwards, back at you. Oh, he would gladly ignore the growing throb between his own legs for a little while, if it meant getting a taste of the slick wetness coating your glistening folds.
Every place where your skin touched his felt smothering hot. He pressed kiss after kiss up your leg, at a torturously slow pace, until he finally got to your center, his mouth watering at the sight. Eager, you opened your legs for him, and soon his plush lips had you mewling, each gentle kiss and lick rendering you weak and dizzy with pleasure.
“Oh, Kyungsoo…”
Your incessant soft sighs turned into moans when he inserted two thick fingers into your pussy and started pumping, in and out, while his tongue focused on your clit. Unthinkingly, your hands flew to his head. Holding him in place, you gasped for air as he continued to search for your most sensitive spot. The sound that came from your throat when he curled his fingers inside of you and finally found it, stirred a completely unknown feeling in him.
It felt like an out-of-body experience, hearing his own name coming from your lips like that. It felt like it couldn’t possibly be real, and yet it was.
“Oh, Kyungs-- oh! Ohh!”
Your back arched on the mattress, your fingers digging into it for support, and when you started to tightly clench around his fingers, the impatience he had been feeling the whole time suddenly flew out the window. He couldn’t wait anymore. Your pussy was tight, soaking, and his dick was rock hard between his legs, the throbbing almost painful. He felt like he was about to go mad.
He looked at you, and was gifted with the wonderful vision of your face still contorted in pleasure, your head spinning, your trembling limbs.
“Why’d you stop?” You moaned, your words slurred.
You could barely look at him, too busy getting your breath back, and he didn’t answer. He unbuckled his pants and discarded the rest of his clothes as quickly as he was able to.
With a slanted smile, he started to crawl over you, slowly taking in your disheveled appearance. Your face was flushed, your chest panting, your eyes burning with desperation. You bit your lip, and your face creased in pleasure as you felt the head of his cock lightly brush your entrance and almost, just almost , push inside. You could barely hold in a needy moan. Gosh. What wouldn't you give to feel him raw inside of you. You visibly held in a pleasured shiver, a clear sign of anticipation, and Kyungsoo had no idea how you'd gathered the willpower to push him aside to go hurriedly look for a condom in your nightstand drawers.
Pushing Kyungsoo aside, you hurriedly opened one of your nightstand drawers, from where you pulled out a condom, all under Kyungsoo’s attentive gaze. It felt bizarre to him that this is how he was finding out where you kept your condoms: in a drawer that he’d seen you open countless times. But this entire experience was feeling a little like that for Kyungsoo.
He was finding out so much about you in such a short period of time that it all felt even more overwhelming than it was probably supposed to. And, on top of that, he was trying so hard to pay attention to every little detail of your body, just so that he could remember all of it later, that it was using up most of his brain's capacity and he wasn’t registering anything else. Or maybe it was just that all the blood had left his brain to travel South and he hadn’t really been thinking for the past ten minutes. Maybe he’d even died and gone to Heaven. Either way, all of a sudden Kyungsoo found himself laying on his back, with your hands on his cock as you rolled a condom down onto it.
He felt one too many sensations as you dragged yourself up his body until your eyes were aligned with his, and your pussy was dripping right onto the tip of his cock.
He was so lost in the moment, so absorbed in the agonizing wait of his hard, aching, and still practically untouched dick, he didn’t register he was speaking, begging, even, for you to fuck him.
“Please…” He kept saying, his head almost spinning, your name coming from his lips in a rough and wanton groan like a mantra. “C’mon, please…”
His hands were gripping onto your thighs, pressing down on them to get you to finally slide down his throbbing cock. A whimper escaped his lips when your heated folds brushed his tip.
“Ah, please…”
He could go insane from this.
The self-sufficient smile you were sporting didn’t register in Kyungsoo’s brain, either, as neither did the way it turned into a creased expression of shock once you finally started to descend onto him. He just groaned, his eyes closing in pleasure as he felt the thick head of his cock breach you, inch by inch. His eyes rolled into the back of his head, and he missed the way yours were very, very open, and you were staying very still, your breathing heavy, as you waited until you got used to his girth.
You let out a trembling sigh when you finally slid all the way down:
“Oh, my God, holy shit…"
When he opened his eyes, he saw you. You were a vision, the living image of eroticism, right at his fingertips. You were leaning your head backwards, shivering in pleasure as you felt your pussy stretching around him. He bucked upwards into you.
God, he loved you, he fucking loved you, he had wanted you, so, so badly, for so very long, and you were finally doing this with him.
I love you so much, he thought. “I fucking love you.”
He started thrusting into your throbbing pussy mindlessly, his mouth spewing total nonsense, moaning on its own accord, each push bringing him closer to a climax he didn’t want to arrive at. He was going to cum in, like, one minute, and it’d be over, the most glorious minute of his life, unless he did something about it.
Your fingers were gripping onto his chest and shoulders as you held yourself up, trying not to lose your balance with each of his hard thrusts, and you kept moaning his name as you bounced on top of him.
“Oh, Kyungsoo...! Oh, Kyungsoo, oh, my God, just like that!”
It was like you were keen on driving him crazy. He couldn’t just stop thrusting when you were encouraging him like that. He just couldn’t. He closed his eyes forcefully, feeling a drop of sweat run down his temple, and he let out a loud groan, as he continued to push.
It felt so good. You felt so good. He was going to cum, and he couldn’t, not at least before you did. He needed to hold it in, but every drag of his swollen cock inside of you, every time his tip hit the deepest spot in your pussy drew him closer and closer. And it almost hurt, the effort he was making so as not to cum.
He had to stop thrusting, at one point, the pleasure way too overwhelming, but you were still rocking your hips on top of him, shifting and squeezing around his cock, up and down its entire length, taking him like a woman possessed. It was torturous. It was the best fuck he’d ever had.
He barely had any brain clarity left to wonder how could his sweet longtime friend move her hips like that, and produce sounds like those. He had to be dreaming. He had to have gone crazy. You were fucking him like an animal, your composure long gone, and you were no longer moaning. You were screaming now, your face torn in pleasure as you rode him even harder, your hips rolling rhythmically, sending waves of pleasure along his spine, harder, harder, and he really, really , REALLY , couldn’t hold it in any longer when he felt your pussy clench around his throbbing cock.
“AH! OH, God…!” The moan that ripped from his throat was raw, almost agonizing, like a cry for help, rather than a scream of pleasure. His orgasm came to him in a violent shockwave. Your movements faltered, finally turning erratic, your moans coming out broken as you, too, reached your own peak.
He couldn’t even watch your beautiful orgasming face, though, because his eyes closed tightly on their own as he filled the condom with hot, white cum.
The next moments were blurry, the aftershocks of his orgasm stunning him for way longer than he was used to. He removed the condom at some point. Who knows when. He couldn’t recall you climbing off of him, either. Only your sweet voice mumbling “Oh, my fucking God…” as you laid down next to him. He probably fell asleep with a big dumb smile on his face.