Work Text:
Kaveh always made fun of Alhaitham for being “down bad”, but deep down, Kaveh knows he is just as down bad.
Kaveh, sitting on the divan as he leaned towards the coffee table, had multiple designs and sketches sprawled out in front of him. He was almost so focused that he wouldn’t have heard the front door open, key word being almost .
“Hi ‘Haitham, how was work?” he asked as he turned his head towards the direction of the front door. He could barely hear Alhaitham murmur a “hello” as he took his shoes off. As Alhaitham finished putting his shoes up and made his way to the divan, Kaveh put his arms against the back of the divan, already knowing how Alhaitham was feeling.
Alhaitham silently sat down on the divan and laid down, resting his head in Kaveh’s lap. “Were you working?” he asked.
Kaveh chuckled as he reached for Alhaitham’s hair, “My work can wait.” Alhaitham just hummed in response.
“You’re like a puppy, y’know that?”
“No.”
Kaveh chucked again, “No?”
“I don’t resemble a puppy in any way.”
Alhaitham was not one for PDA – which did not bother Kaveh in the slightest – but he still showed Kaveh love in ways only he and their friends could see: cutting Kaveh’s drinks off once he’s starting to reach his limit, going to artistic events – such as Nilou’s performances – simply because Kaveh loves them, learning to make Kaveh’s favorite foods and desserts, getting extra fruit whenever he’s shopping in the bazaar, and so on. Alhaitham is attentive and considerate regardless of what his exterior does or doesn’t give away.
Kaveh also loves Alhaitham in a plethora of ways, so many in fact that Alhaitham still hasn’t noticed all of them.
Lately, Kaveh has been wanting to improve in drawing things other than buildings. Thankfully, he has the most beautiful muse he could think of. That, of course, is his boyfriend.
Kaveh and Alhaitham are currently eating breakfast in silence. Alhaitham has a book next to his plate as he eats while Kaveh is sketching as he occasionally takes bites of his food.
“You should focus more on eating than drawing considering you have a long day today,” Alhaitham says, all without looking up from his book.
Kaveh groans, “Please don’t remind me of my clients today. You’re so lucky you have today off.” He had two clients in particular today that just won’t budge about their dream homes despite 1.) their dreams not being feasible due to their structure and 2.) Kaveh being the one that is an architect.
Kaveh eventually puts his pencil down, finishes his food, and takes both his and Alhaitham’s plates to the sink. Alhaitham appears next to Kaveh and rests a hand on his back as Kaveh is about to turn on the water to do the dishes. “You should go get ready. I’ll do the dishes.”
“Are you sure? You did them yesterday,” Kaveh argues, albeit weakly.
“Yes Kaveh, your work is more important than the dishes. Go get ready.”
Kaveh mutters an ‘okay’ in response, kisses Alhaitham on the cheek, and continues to go get ready. By the time Alhaitham had finished up the dishes and started reading a book whilst sitting on the divan, Kaveh had just emerged from the bathroom ready to leave. He wordlessly came over to Alhaitham, kissed him on the head, and said he’d be back in three hours.
“Don’t kill your clients,” Alhaitham said as Kaveh put on his shoes.
“Oh, but don’t I have the Acting Grand Sage to defend me?”
“Defending people in court is not my job. I pay those below me to do that.”
Kaveh groans, “You suck! What kind of boyfriend are you if you can’t defend murder?”
Alhaitham couldn’t help but smile at Kaveh’s absurdity. It had taken some time until after Kaveh had left for his meetings for Alhaitham to get back up to get a glass of water. On his short way to the kitchen, some items on the table left behind by his lover caught his attention. Kaveh’s sketchbook had been left open on the table sitting next to a lone pencil. It was no secret to Alhaitham that Kaveh had been trying to add some more diversity to his artistic abilities, but he never pried to see what it was he was drawing. He felt that if Kaveh wanted his art to be seen, he would simply show him; Alhaitham felt no need to pry. He felt that it would be an invasion of privacy, similar to if Kaveh were to pry through Alhaitham’s journals. If Alhaitham wanted his thoughts to be heard, he’d simply verbalize them.
However, Kaveh’s sketchbook was left wide open on the kitchen table. Alhaitham didn’t mean to pry, but now that he had a glimpse he couldn’t quite look away.
To say he was shocked was an understatement. He was met with drawings (sketches maybe? Alhaitham is unsure of artistics thresholds and what is considered a sketch versus a drawing) of him eating breakfast on one page and him reading a book on the other. He – not to toot his own horn – knew he was an objectively attractive man, but he was still not used to this type of attention from another person. He knew that Kaveh was attracted to him, but he never knew that Kaveh looked at him enough to create pieces with such detail.
To say Alhaitham was flustered was an understatement. He was flattered of course, but as someone who didn’t pay much mind to how others perceive him he felt somewhat embarrassed to actually see himself ‘from another lens’.
–
Kaveh had thirty minutes in between clients, long enough to be bored but not short enough to go back home. As he goes to reach for his sketchbook to keep himself busy as he waits for his next client in Puspa Cafe, he realizes that his sketchbook isn’t with him today. Thankfully, he has a pen with him. He then takes one of the napkins from the napkin holder sitting atop the table and starts to draw aimlessly. It takes him no more than two minutes to realize his hands have gone on autopilot and started drawing his lover without even consciously thinking about the strokes he was making with his pen. He stops briefly to take in his rough sketch, embarrassment quickly flooding his senses.
This has been a habit for years, even when he and Alhaitham were still students in the Akademiya. There were multiple times they were sitting across from each other studying and Kaveh needed a mental break from his banal textbooks that he started mindlessly drawing shapes that vaguely resembled the man (well, boy at the time) in front of him.
Kaveh was embarrassed at how smitten he was, it made him feel vulnerable. He knew he had Alhaitham now; but, regardless of having him, he still wanted him so badly it made him want to explode. He wanted Alhaitham sitting next to him now because he’d know how to lift his mood after the horrible meeting he just had. He wanted Alhaitham whenever he was away for work because he knew how to make their house feel like a home. He wanted Alhaitham in the mornings when Kaveh was making breakfast and Alhaitham was still sleeping because Kaveh tends to let the eggs cook just a tad bit too long (Alhaitham makes the perfect runny eggs).
He did not know how to express these feelings without being seen as pathetic, and he did not want to express these feelings because they were really embarrassing. So, Kaveh drew. He drew the man that made him simultaneously feel furious and smitten. He admired looked at his boyfriend so often that he no longer had to think prior to drawing. He simply knew what to do with his hands now.
Kaveh’s feelings being brought to the forefront of his attention embarrassed him and left him flustered, but his thoughts were interrupted by his client arriving and taking their seat.
–
Alhaitham knew that Kaveh was home when he suddenly heard a ‘click’ followed by a groan. It took no more than five seconds, “You won’t believe what these clients complained about today!”
Again, it took no more than five seconds for Kaveh to cut himself off. “Why is my sketchbook open on the kitchen table?”
Alhaitham is now looking at Kaveh, who is not looking at him. “You left it like that when you left for work. I didn’t want to pry so I left your things where they were.”
“You didn’t… look?”
“Well,” Alhaitham starts speaking, trying to come up with a way to say the truth without invading Kaveh’s personal space. “Of course, I saw those two pages, but I didn’t flip through anymore.”
It’s silent as Kaveh tries to figure out how he should respond. The silence is not uncomfortable, but Alhaitham decides to fill it anyway because at this rate Kaveh won’t do it himself.
“The drawings are fair.”
It’s silent for another beat, “You like them?”, is what Kaveh settles on asking.
“Why would I not? I think I’m a very attractive man.” Alhaitham, of course, only says this to rile Kaveh up. It works splendidly. It’s as if a switch in Kaveh’s brain was flipped.
“Oh, you asshole! I knew that if I had told you it would have done nothing but make your head even bigger!”
Alhaitham’s curiosity piqued at that, “‘Told’? Is there more?”
“No! Even if there was, I wouldn’t tell you!”
“So there is,” Alhaitham states, leaving no room for Kaveh to argue against it.
Their banter devolves into a back and forth on whether or not something is wrong and if Kaveh has been feeling alright. It, much to Kaveh’s dismay, ends up leading to Kaveh spreading his feelings out on the table for Alhaitham to inspect.
“Did you seriously think that I would make fun of or shame you for ‘wanting me’ when you, of all people, are well aware I am just as bad. Perhaps even worse.”
“It was embarrassing!” Kaveh exclaims, refusing to make eye contact, presumably out of embarrassment. “You can feel all these things and be smitten with such a stoic look on your face! I can’t! That’s what makes it embarrassing.”
Alhaitham knows Kaveh better than anyone, so he knows to just approach Kaveh and wrap his arms around him rather than try to argue with him. “If you think those two pages are embarrassing then maybe I’ll let you read my journal eventually.”
Unmoving, Kaveh stays wrapped up in Alhaitham but does not hesitate to smack his back before answering, “Seriously? I just poured out my heart and all I get is a ‘maybe’?”
Alhaitham laughs into Kaveh’s shoulder as he responds. “You can read my journals. I promise you’re not embarrassing. I’d like to see more drawings whenever you’re not as embarrassed.”
Kaveh is unusually silent before responding with “Maybe”. All Alhaitham can do now is laugh because of how their roles switch so quickly. Expressing their love may very well be embarrassing, but they know they’ll never regret it.