Work Text:
Vi woke up to the sound of the smoke detector going off. She looked to the other side of the bed and Caitlyn was not there. Groggily, Vi gets up out of bed to investigate what caused the smoke detector to go off. When she made her way downstairs there was some smoke coming from the kitchen.
"Who the fuck is burning down the kitchen?"
The sound of Caitlyn's frustrated scream answered her question. Caitlyn Kiramman, the Sheriff of Piltover, Leader of House Kiramman, and an excellent shot turned out to be bad or better yet terrible at cooking.
At first, she thought Tobias was joking when he warned her that Cait's cooking skills are bad. Vi would find that out during one of her and Cait's date nights. They had decided on a quiet evening at home. As Vi was on her way to the wine cellar to pick out some wine to go with dinner, the smoke detector went off and she rushed over to the kitchen to check on Cait. When she got there, the following sight burned into her memory: what was supposed to be garlic bread charred into a hardened black rock, the pasta in the pot in flames, and the shame and embarrassment on the face of the worst cook ever as she used the fire extinguisher to put the fire out. They ended up having take-out that night.
On her way to the kitchen, Vi grabbed the fire extinguisher. As soon as she got there, the pot was in flames and Caitlyn was pulling at her hair in frustration. A cookbook right next to the pot, the page showing a soft-boiled egg recipe.
"Cupcake?"
Caitlyn spun on her feet to see Vi standing in the kitchen holding the fire extinguisher. She let out a frustrated sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose.
"Lit the kitchen on fire again, huh?" Vi asked.
"I Followed the recipe! What went wrong?" Caitlyn once again pulled at her hair in frustration.
"It's okay. Just back away, Cait," said Vi.
"But I read the–"
"No, you read it, assumed it was wrong, decided you knew better, and now we're ten seconds away from burning the entire house down." Vi replied.
Caitlyn looked at Vi and at the flaming pot, then sighed in defeat.
"...fine." she pouted and moved out of the way so Vi could put the fire out.
Vi used the fire extinguisher to put the fire out. Once the fire was out the smoke detector went quiet. Vi and Cait took a look at the pot to assess the damage. Inside the pot are six eggs completely charred black. Vi poked at them with a spatula. Upon closer inspection it was clear that it was not just the eggs that had been burned.
"Uh, Vi I burnt the water too," said Caitlyn.
"Cait, how the fuck did you even burn the water?" Vi asked dumbfounded.
Before Cait could respond, Tobias came rushing into the kitchen.
"Is everything all right? I heard the smoke detector go off." Tobias looked at the charred pot then at his daughter and daughter-in-law. Tobias immediately put two and two together.
"Oh, dear not again."
"Yep, it happened again," said Vi.
Cait buried her hands in her face in embarrassment.
Vi showed Tobias Caitlyn's handiwork.
"Well at least she is not as bad as her mother," said Tobias.
"What?" both Cait and Vi asked, shocked that Cassandra of all people was worse than Cait at cooking.
"One of the worst incidents involved our 20th anniversary dinner many years ago. It was so bad that the fire department had to be bribed." Tobias recalled.
"I remember that now." When that happened, Cait was out helping out Jayce. They came to the Kiramman Estate only to find two fire trucks parked in front. "That explained why she locked herself in the study for the rest of that day."
After cleaning up the mess, they decided to have some toast which is easier than Cait's failed attempt at boiling eggs. Now they were getting ready for the day before leaving for work.
"Vi I never intended for this to happen," said Caitlyn
Vi walked up and touched her wife's cheek. "I'm not mad, it's not the end of the world."
"I only wanted to make breakfast for us, I didn't mean for it to get that bad."
Vi briefly kisses her on the lips.
"Considering what happened today and what I just found out about your mother, I have a solution for this problem," said Vi.
"Meaning?" Caitlyn asked.
"First, I'm not letting you anywhere near that damn stove unsupervised. Second, please for the love of god, take a cooking class."