Work Text:
118 FireFam
Cap🫡: Athena and I are hosting a bbq in 2 weeks and we expect all of you to be there! Significant others and kids are welcome to come too! - Bobby Nash
Chim bucket: The Hans will be there!
Ravioli: you know I’ll be there cap 😌
The Smart One: We might be a little late but the Wilson’s will be there too!
Cap🫡: Buck? Eddie? Will we see you there? -Bobby Nash
Lightning McQueen: Sorry Eddie and I are at the gym. We’ll both be there and I’ll bring Tommy😊
Ravioli:
Ravioli: Actually my bad cap I can’t make it I forgot I had plans.
Cap🫡: I already told Athena you’re coming so no backing out. -Bobby Nash
Lightning McQueen: Damn Ravs you got a problem with the gays?🧐
Ravioli: Nah I fucking love Hen, Karen, and Eddie!
Ravioli: and occasionally you
Street fighter: uhhhh im not gay…..
Chim bucket: yeah ok pal👍
The Smart One: love you too ravs🥰
Lightning McQueen: oh so you just don’t like Tommy?
Ravioli: yes bby❤️
Lightning McQueen: ok well im bringing him anyway so get over it
Cap🫡: Please play nice kids! No more fighting - Bobby Nash
Ravioli: will do cap🫡
Ravioli: yall meet me in the chat that doesn’t have Buck
Lightning McQueen: REALLY RAVI????
Lightning McQueen: the group chat without me????
Lightning McQueen: ADD ME TO THE GROUP PLS????
Firefam minus Buck
L in LGBT: My guy I’m crying. I know he's pissed rn 🤣
Forever probie: Don’t care. Im pissed I have to see his stupid ass dildo of a man 🤷🏽♂️
Encephalitis: GODDAMN RAVI YOURE ON A ROLL😂
Sniped: DEAD, I LOVE YOU RAVI💀
L in LGBT: Holy shit i'm obsessed with this 🤣
Forever Probie: Eddie I'm gonna need you to get your man back so we don’t have to deal with Tommy anymore.
Encephalitis: I second that. Please put an end to our misery 🙏
Sniped: Trust me, I wanna get rid of that abomination of a human too buuut….
Sniped: I'm not gay and even if I was, Buck wouldn’t get with me.
L in LGBT: Oh for fucks sakes
L in LGBT: This is not platonic my love
Forever probie: yeah he looks like he’s trying to hit that
Sniped: No way! He always looks at me like that! It doesn’t mean he wants to fuck me
Encephalitis:
L in LGBT: Eddie…
Forever probie: He’s gotta be fucking with us. There’s no way.
Sniped: please be so real with me
Sniped: I’m having a crisis rn thinking about this
Sniped: Do you genuinely think Buck likes me???
Encephalitis: Eddie you literally co-parent a child together
L in LGBT: He tried to dig through 40 feet of mud with his bare hands to get to you
Forever probie: He has this picture framed in his room
Encephalitis: NO FUCKING WAY YOURE LYING
L in LGBT: HE FUCKING FRAMED IT IN HIS ROOM?????
L in LGBT: THE ROOM HE SLEEPS IN???
Sniped: He was working on his photography skills and asked me to model! He was really proud of the shoot so he framed it. It's def not that serious.
Sniped: Like look at how good he is at photography!! He should proudly display his art!
Forever probie: pause dumbass
Forever probie: IT WAS A WHOLE PHOTOSHOOT????
Forever probie: WHOS IDEA WAS IT FOR YOU TO GRAB YOUR BELT LIKE THAT MF????
Sniped: Buck…
L in LGBT: oh Eds, this is so, so gay
Encephalitis: It’s so much worse than we thought.
Sniped: 😳😳😳😳
Messages between Eddie and Hen
Eddie: pls hen you have to help me 😭
Eddie: I think I might be gay
Hen: Ok…. I'm assuming this has something to do with your best friend.
Eddie: Of course it is. I never thought he actually liked me that way but when it's pointed out its kinda had to unsee
Hen: I’m sorry but did you really not see any of the signs Eddie? Hell the way you act with him is pretty gay too.
Eddie: Again now that it's been pointed out I can see that
Eddie: And it makes me hate Tommy even more
Eddie: I can treat Buck so much better than he can
Eddie: He looks like the human version of a 2x4
Hen: Ok so lets get your man back! We can come up with a plan to get rid of Tommy!
Hen: Also thank you for feeling comfortable enough to come out to me! That’s a really big thing and I'm proud of you Eddie. For real I’m so happy for you❤️
Eddie: Yeah I'm totally not crying right now because of that text. Love you Hen🥹❤️
Hen: Love you too Eds 😊❤️
Operation Abort Tommy
Eddie: I bet you're all wondering why I gathered you here today.
Ravi: you named the group chat abort Tommy. Literally no one is wondering
Eddie: fuck off I was trying to be dramatic. Do you wanna get rid of him or not?
Ravi: my bad i'll shut up.
Chim adds Maddie to the chat
Chim changes Eddie’s name to newly gay
Chim changes Ravi’s name to menace
Chim changes Hen’s name to lesbian Jesus
Chim changes Maddie’s name to mastermind
Chim changes his name to masterminds wife
Mastermind’s wife: sorry but we can’t have normal names in a groupchat. You know this Eddie.
Mastermind’s wife: Anyway Maddie has wanted to get rid of Tommy for a while now so I figured she could help.
Newly gay: omg yes! If anyone can help its Maddie.
Mastermind: THANK GOD MY PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED!
Mastermind: Also congrats on the coming out Eddie! We’re so proud and happy for you ❤️❤️❤️
Mastermind: For real though i'm so glad we all are trying to get rid of the douchbag
Newly Gay: thank you🥹❤️
Lesbian Jesus: Ok So what's the plan cause Buck isn’t going to listen to us if we just say we don’t like him.
Mastermind: I have a binder filled with ideas but the best and most legal one is the jealousy plan 😊
Mastermind’s wife: My dear, the most legal?
Newly gay: You have a binder of ideas?
Menace: I say we just skip to one of the illegal plans. They’re probably more fun and we have Athena so we'll be good.
Menace: Also we got Mr. Silver star. You can do anything you want with one of those.
Newly gay: Who tf told you that?🤨
Menace: your husband
Lesbian Jesus: We should’ve known. We’re not going the illegal route. Athena will kill us
Newly Gay: Agreed! We’re not doing that. Maddie, what's the jealousy plan?
Mastermind: It's very simple really. All we need to do is make my brother jealous.
Maddie adds Josh to the chat
Mastermind: Eddie, you and Josh will fake date on instagram and Buck will immediately get jealous and leave Tommy. 😌
Newly gay: yeah fuck that. What’s the illegal plan?
Josh: Agreed. No one would believe me and homotron over here would date
Menace: IM CRYING
Lesbian Jesus: HOMOTRON IS TOO FUCKING GOOD🤣
Menace changed Newly gay’s name to Homotron
Homotron: Keep playing Ravi. Ill text Buck saying you and May wanna go on a double date with him and Tommy
Menace: wowowowow you took it too far homotron😭
Mastermind: Stop with the bullshit, we have important things to do
Mastermind: Eddie and Josh, I wasn’t asking, i'm telling you that's the plan.
Mastermind: Everyone else, support the happy couple and mess with Buck in the comments. The crimson chin will be gone before the bbq
Lesbian Jesus: We love a dominant queen 💅💕
Mastermind’s wife: I love my wife guys
118 FireFam minus Eddie
Fuckboi: WHEN THE FUCK DID THIS HAPPEN?
Work Wife: oof I know that gotta hurt😬
Chim Bucket: Like a week ago. Maddie and I went on a double date with them. They seem happy together🤷🏻♂️
Fuckboi: TF YOU MEAN YOU WENT ON A DOUBLE DATE???
Fuckboi: EDDIE HATES JOSH
Fuckboi: SINCE WHEN DOES HE EVEN LIKE MEN????
Work Wife: My brother in Christ, i'm gonna hold your hand when I say this…
Work Wife: That man was never straight. He terrorized the women of LA for years. It was time for him to get with a man.
Fuckboi: OK FINE, BUT JOSH??? JOSH RUSSO? OUT OF ALL PEOPLE?? OUT OF EVERY SINGLE MAN IN LOS ANGELES CALIFORNIA???
Forgotten One: My God dude just say you wanna fuck your best friend. We all know thats why you’re going through a crisis rn
Fuckboi: I DO NOT WANT TO FUCK EDDIE
Fuckboi: I JUST WANNA KNOW WHY JOSH?
Forgotten One:
Forgotten One: “I don’t wanna fuck Eddie” but you sent 10 texts using all caps to complain about his new boyfriend 😒
Work Wife: #truth
Chim bucket: Maybe you and Tommy can go on a double date with them. That could ease some tension
Forgotten One: oh nah that shit is going to end with ww3😂
Work Wife: Karen and I would love to see that disaster if you wanna make it a triple date. Get all the gays together ya know😊
Chim Bucket: We’re not gay but Maddie and I will absolutely show up. You couldn't pay me to miss that shit
Fuckboi: It would not end in ww3, I’m sure we could possibly be civil 🙄
Forgotten One: I’m pan and May is bi, does this mean we can come???? I wanna see this shit too!
Fuckboi: YOU'RE DATING MAY?????
Fuckboi: WHY DOES NO ONE TELL ME ANYTHING???
Chim Bucket: Dude this stuff has been said multiple times. Where have you been?
Work Wife: You and May can def come Ravi. And they’ve been dating for like 6 months Buck
Forgotten One: You don’t notice cause you’re always too busy eye-fucking Eddie
Fuckboi: I HATE ALL OF YOU
Work Wife: aww big boy has big feelings right now😣 get tf over it🙄
Messages between Buck and Tommy
Tommy: Evan what the fuck???
Tommy:
Buck: i just wanted to prove that I take the best pictures of Eddie 🤷🏼♂️
Buck: Not some dumbass photographer that Josh knows
Tommy: Do you know how jealous you look rn?
Buck: Do YOU know how jealous YOU look rn????
Buck: I don't think we even had to bring this up.
Tommy: HALF OF THE COMMENTS ARE SAYING YOURE JEALOUS OF JOSH
Tommy: AND THE OTHER HALF ARE ASKING IF YOU AND EDDIE ARE DATING
Buck: ok and? I said he was my best friend in the caption. I can't control what others comment on my post
Tommy: You're being a little bitch rn
Buck: YouRe BeIng a LiTtlE BitCh Rn
Buck: You do know that you are my current boyfriend right? Eddie isn’t coming over to sleep in my bed tonight. You are, so stop worrying about him.
Tommy: Fine but can you at least post a pic of us so people know we’re together?
Buck: I guess so Thomas
The 118 minus cap (out of pocket chat😈)
Cancer kid: The pics Buck takes of Eddie >>>> the ones of Tommy
Cancer kid:
Almost Dr.MOTHER FUCKER YOU NEED TO PUT A TRIGGER WARNING FOR SHIT LIKE THAT😭
Ayo rebar: Jee had my phone, when the pic popped up. She’s screaming in the corner now asking me to get rid of the scary man
Spare parts: You guys are so fucking dramatic 🙄
Spare parts: Leave my man alone.
Cancer kid: What are you talking about? We didn't say anything about Eddie!
Cancer kid: Oh shit you meant the scary man. Yeah sorry bro I promise I wont leave him alone😔
Spare parts: I hate all of you
From Texas🤢:Even me??? I didn't do anything🥺
Spare parts:Never you Eds. You’re absolutely perfect. you're an angel of a man 😘
Cancer kid: Don’t be too nice, you know Eddie has a praise kink. Wouldn’t want to make the scary man jealous by turning on another man😗
Spare parts: You know what, I'm really tired of your shit Ravi. Can you please stop bullying Tommy and let me be happy?
From Texas🤢: I don’t have a praise kink I swear
Cancer kid: It’s not bullying if it's about Tommy, but I will stop if you can genuinely say he makes you happy
Spare parts: I’m done, you’re blocked
Ayo rebar : Jee is still crying guys, idk what to do
Messages between Buck, Eddie, Tommy, and Josh
Tommy: Ok guys I think we need to clear the air here
Josh: How tf did you get my number?
Eddie: What air needs clearing? Im very confused
Buck: I gave it to him Josh and it’s about the jealousy rumors that are circulating.
Tommy: It's come to our attention that many people think Evan is jealous of the relationship between you two.
Josh: Who tf is Evan????
Josh: And I don’t give a fuck about jealousy rumors cause at the end of the day I know I’m the only one getting fucked by a silver star D if ya know what I mean😏
Josh: My man and I are confident in our relationship. It’s not our fault neither of you are🤷🏻♂️
Eddie: Jesus Christ Josh they don’t need to know all of our fucking business, 😳
Eddie: also Evan is Buck’s real name lol
Tommy: I'm not even sure what I should respond to that.
Buck: You and Eddie are fucking????
Josh: Yeah he’s my boyfriend and again it looks like the jealousy is only coming from one side of this conversation.
Josh: @ “Evan” and Tommy
Tommy: Let's get one thing straight. I'm not jealous of you dating Eddie.
Josh: Please, your fucking pilgrim looking ass has wanted him since the day you met. You’re only with Buck because Eddie didn't want someone built like a minecraft creeper
Josh: Here “Evan” you can frame this instead of my man in your room 😘
Josh:
Tommy: Oh fuck off you stupid twink. I never wanted Eddie and I’m perfectly happy with Evan 🖕
Eddie: Holy shit babes, I almost didn’t notice you changed Tommy’s body! 😂
Josh: Thanks my love😘
Josh: IM CRYING🤣! Stupid twink is the best you can do? You’re insults are as pathetic as “Evan’s” attempt at making me jealous on instagram 🤣
Buck: You call him babes????
Buck: Also I wasn’t trying to make you jealous. I was just showing off my photography skills.
Josh: You keep telling yourself that kid. I'm sure you’ll believe it one day.
Eddie:
Buck:I agree with Eddie. This isn’t going anywhere productive so I think we need to end this
Josh: Of course you agree with Eddie! Just find that funny. See you all at Bobby and Athena’s ✌️
Messages between Josh and Eddie
Homotron changed Josh’s name to stupid twink
Homotron: Dude, silver star d???? You might’ve went to far with that one
Stupid twink: That's your biggest concern? I said you give good dick, you should be grateful! Im very critical of the dick I receive.
Homotron: Yeah but no one needs to know we fucked Josh
Stupid twink: Dumbass the only people we told are the 2 of them and we can say we lied for the bit. And again it was a compliment
Stupid twink: I honestly thought you would be more mad at me lowkey coming for “Evan”
Homotron: I mean I was a little mad but I was too busy laughing at the Tommy insults. I showed Chris the Minecraft one and he laughed so hard he cried. 😂
Stupid twink: Glad i could make the kid laugh😊
Stupid twink: So round 2 tomorrow?😏
Homotron: With the jealousy plan or the silver star d?
Stupid twink: both if i'm lucky 😜
Homotron: Good night stupid twink
Stupid twink: Oh come on homotron, you're gonna leave me hanging like that?🤣
Operation Abort Tommy
Mastermind: Guys I have to say the plan is working stunningly.
Mastermind: Good job team! I’m proud of everyone’s effort! We’re almost to the finish line.
Stupid Twink: I’m genuinely having too much fun with this. Happy to get rid of Tommy but sad this has to end soon.
Homotron: Agreed. Fucking with Tommy’s head is so fun.
Stupid Twink: i'm gonna miss the adventures of homotron and the stupid twink😔
Menace: I feel like my abilities aren’t being utilized enough. The insta comments aren’t enough for me. I NEED MORE
Lesbian Jesus: what the fuck Ravi? You good?
Mastermind: you’re THE menace. I know you’ll come up with something good to do! If anyone can piss of Tommy it’s you❤️
Menace: you know what? I am the menace. I CAN do devious things! I’ll be right back.
Mastermind’s wife: I know he’s going to do something so fucking funny. I can’t wait
Menace: I got blocked😞
Menace:
Homotron: RAVI I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
Lesbian Jesus: This is king behavior ravs
Mastermind: You guys need to get on Ravi’s level because he’s working overtime on this shit
Menace: Im just out here doing the lords work😌🙏
Stupid twink: bullying Tommy is honestly such a turn on
Homotron: agreed
Menace: I said it once and I'll say it again, it's not bullying if it's about Tommy!
Messages between Buck and Maddie
Buck: You need to tell your friend to back off
Buck: He’s being a dick and it's getting old
Buck: plus Bobby said you all of you have to be nice to my boyfriend
Maddie: I'm assuming you're talking about Josh and both of you are grown men. Im not getting in the middle.
Maddie: and I know damn well Bobby didn't say that🙄
Buck: Maddie he's texting us saying he got Eddie’s “silver star d” and he knows Tommy and I are “jealous” about it.
Maddie: Are you?
Buck: Jealous of him sleeping with Eddie? No, of course not why would I be??
Maddie: Oh please Buck we all know you want to be with Eddie. It’s not like you hide it. 🙄
Buck: He’s with Josh now (🤢). He doesn’t want me.
Maddie:
Maddie: I’m just gonna leave this here…
Buck: oh
Buck:OH
Buck: Maddie this picture is doing things to me. 😮💨
Maddie: Jesus Christ Buck don’t tell me shit like that. I don’t want to hear about how badly you want Eddie.
Buck: It looks like he wants to devour me and honestly, I would love it.
Maddie: mmmm no nope we’re not doing this. No thank you👎
Buck: ugh I would love to pick him up and throw him up against a wall. We would fuck nasty Maddie and it would be delightful.
Buck: You think he would throw me up against a wall? It looks like he would but I want another opinion. Again I would absolutely LOVE that
Maddie: EVAN ROBERT BUCKLEY STOP THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW
Buck: tf? my middle name isn’t Robert
Buck: Also you’re not being sex positive. I’m just trying to come to you as my older sister for advice
Maddie: Well Bobby is pretty much our father so I just tell everyone that's your middle name now. 🤷🏻♀️
Maddie: and you’re so right, I’m not being sex positive so go talk to someone else about this shit.
Maddie: If you keep talking about how you wanna fuck Eddie I’m gonna tell dad on you.
Buck: Girl please, I'll tell him myself. He’ll actually give me good advice cause Bobby is very sex positive.
Maddie: Here's some advice, break up with Tommy and get with Eddie.
Buck: not good advice.
Maddie: it's actually the best advice
Buck: Maddie be so for real rn. Even if I do break up with Tommy, Eddie is still with josh. I cant make him break up with his boyfriend
Buck: and i'm telling you if he chooses Josh over me I will NEVER recover from that
Maddie: so you do want to get with Eddie????😏
Buck: Of course I do! Have you seen him, he’s a fucking GOD, he’s so gorgeous. I didn't know he was gay though so I never thought it could happen. You think if I knew he liked men I wouldn’t have POUNCED on him.
Maddie: Wild you didn't know he was gay but I think you need to talk to him. I'm positive he would leave Josh for you.
Maddie: He loves you Buck. That’s a fact❤️
Buck: ok well im gonna cry now because you said he loves me.
Buck: I think i'm gonna break up with Tommy now
Maddie: THANK GOD 🙌🙌🙌
Maddie: sorry not sorry I fucking hate that dude
Maddie: I’ve been praying for his downfall
Maddie: don’t know what you found attractive about the human equivalent of a cyber truck
Buck: Goddamn Maddie. Do you feel better after getting that out?
Maddie: I feel fucking delightful
Operation Abort Tommy
Mastermind: EDDIE
Mastermind: Buck is about to text you saying he broke up with Tommy
Menace: LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO🙌🙌
Mastermind: I NEED you to tell him you’re not breaking up with josh.
Lesbian Jesus: I already love where this is going queen
Mastermind: that fucker made me listen to him talking about how he wants to fuck Eddie and I think it would be funny revenge.
Homotron: I GOT YOU
Homotron: It's the least I can do for you. Ya know since this was all your plan and I will get to fuck your brother after😏
Mastermind: You're lucky I like you so much more than Tommy, Diaz.
Stupid twink: I'm still coming to the bbq. Idc that im your ex and it might be awkward
Mastermind's wife: Please come! I wanna see Buck be pissed all night
Messages between Buck and Tommy
Buck: hey bro just letting you know we’re over. Im finally getting with Eddie lol.
Tommy: are you fucking serious Evan?
Tommy: i know you’re not breaking up with me over text
Tommy: I knew you were fucking jealous of josh
The number you’re trying to reach has blocked you
Messages between Buck and Eddie
Buck: EDDIE
Buck:EDDIE
Buck:EDDIE
Buck:EDDIE
Buck:EDDIE
Eddie: No need to keep going, I'm here. What’s up?
Buck: I need to tell you something
Eddie: ok…..
Buck: it's actually 2 things
Buck: first
Buck: you bring the silver star D, I bring the firehose! It’s a recipe for a great time!
Eddie: OH MY GOD BUCK
Eddie: YOU HAVE A WHOLE BOYFRIEND
Eddie: I HAVE A WHOLE BOYFRIEND
Buck: which brings me to the second thing
Buck: I broke up with Tommy so we just need you to break up with josh😌
Eddie: YOU BROKE UP WITH TOMMY????
Buck: Yeah mf and I’m trying to get with you so can you please break up with your man. I’d rather not enter my buckfidelity phase again
Buck: I mean I would for you but it's really not ideal
Eddie: Oh buck…
Buck: No oh Buck! Why are you saying oh Buck????
Eddie: It's just, I really like Josh and we’ve gotten really close. We actually have a lot in common and I don’t want to ruin the good thing I have going right now. I love you Buck but I'm not breaking up with josh.
Messages between Buck and Maddie
Buck: YOU LIED
Buck: YOU FUCKING LIED MADDIE
Buck: HE FUCKING SAID HES STAYING WITH JOSH
Buck: I'M MOVING BACK TO PERU AND CHANGING MY NAME. I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE
Maddie: #dramatic
Buck: HOW TF AM I SUPPOSED TO SHOW MY FACE IN LA AFTER THAT DEVASTATING LET DOWN
Messages between Buck and Eddie
Eddie: Buck…
Eddie: I have something else to tell you!!!!
Buck: oh! Um what is it?
Eddie: I was just fucking around. I'm absolutely breaking up with Josh.
Eddie: I feel like I have to be honest now that you're my boyfriend we were never actually dating
Eddie: it was all to make you jealous so you would break up with Tommy and get with me because I was jealous
Eddie: you're not mad right?
Buck: MAD????? THIS IS THE GREATEST NEWS EVER
Buck: I DON'T EVEN CARE YOU LIED CAUSE EDDIE DIAZ IS MY BOYFRIEND NOW
Buck:THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY OF MY LIFE
Buck: GOD THIS AND YOU DIDNT ACTUALLY FUCK HIM????IM SO HYPE RN
Buck:I FUCKING LOVE YOU EDMUNDO❤️❤️❤️❤️
Eddie: I'm glad I could make you this happy😂 I love you too buck❤️😌
Eddie: also Chris is sleeping at Hen’s tonight if you wanna come over👀
Buck: MY DAY IS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER BABY
Messages between Eddie and Josh
Homotron: Well stupid twink, I guess our time has come to an end. I’m here to remind you we are telling ✨no one✨that we slept together.
homotron: I’m not gonna lie though, it was fun while it lasted😌
Stupid twink: Yeah yeah I’m not telling anyone 🙄
Stupid Twink: We both knew the end was inevitable though homotron😔
Stupid Twink: there's no one else I would rather fake date than you ❤️
Homotron: I'm gonna miss this adventure we had🥺
Stupid Twink: God we’re so stupid. Were acting like well never see each other again😂
Homotron: We’re just dramatic af. I love it for us 😂
Stupid Twink: Oh same. And lets be so honest, homotron and the stupid twink will absolutely go on more dumbass adventures😂😌
Homotron: I guarantee it. Just no more sleeping together (sorry I can't cheat on buck)
Stupid Twink: lmao I figured you wouldn’t dumbass 😂
Homotron: 🖕🖕🖕❤️