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The hot weather burned on Arthur's skin. It hurt, the way the scorching sun would make him feel like he was being burnt alive with his open wounds and nearly healed scars. Yet, it wasn't so bad to feel that pain once in a while, to have something to show him he truly was alive rather a dead corpse rotting away in the cold, lifeless nights.
Summer was always Arthur's favorite season. It reminded him of Alfred; it was bright, exciting, and most of all, perfect. He found funny, really, the way they were like oblivious teenagers to the world around them, for in each other, they found solace. Love . Soft, sweet touches to ease their worries from time to time as they cry and cry, again and again.
It always brought him back to that one time in the twilight whenever he remembered Alfred and him in their high school years, the cool wind brushing against their skin and clothes, singing its emotions with life.
"Arthur," Alfred called out amidst the silence. He turns his head to face Arthur. Arthur was already looking at him, eyes filled with curiosity. He smiles fondly at the sight. "What do you think about space? Like, all those stars and planets?"
Arthur returned the wholehearted smile with one of his own. "Why?" Was all he asked. "Is it because we're stargazing?"
"No, not really, but," Alfred looks back up at the dark yet so bright sky, the moon shining a shadow over his dace as he reached a hand out to what seemed like the heavens above. "have you ever wished you could just... go there? Explore the places nobody has before? I'd like to walk on the moon too." It caused a loud laugh out of Arthur, which Alfred began to flush up in embarrassment. "W-What?! I'm being entirely serious here!" He sat up from the grass, face fast to be covered in a pink dust.
Arthur didn't stop laughing anytime soon, but managed to get the words "I know" in the middle of laughing. At last, after a minute or so, he calmed down, hiccuping as his laughs still lingered. "G-Gods, yes, sorry, Alfred. I know you're certain about that thought. It's just," His face goes back to a smile full of love. Though, the glint of loneliness lingered. "You'd be gone for so long. How would I go about the days without you?"
Ah. He didn't think about that part.
Alfred frowns, moving over on top of Arthur, observing his expressions intently. He moved his hand to his lover's face, caressing the smooth skin. One thing that Alfred adored about Arthur were those near invisible freckles on his cheeks. The thought brushed away with the smile returning in its stead.
"I'll make you come with me then," he joked, leaning down to capture Arthur's lips in a loving kiss. "We could gaze at the stars from there too."
As gentle as it was, Alfred's hand moved down to Arthur's hips, rubbing the exposed skin in small circles with his thumb. He felt like teasing. Alfred pulled away from the kiss, staring right into Arthur's lidded eyes, panting softly.
His innocent-seeming eyes kept their gaze on him whilst both his hands were now on Arthur's waist, moving his shirt up to reveal his tummy. He poked at his stomach, earning him a flinch.
"Alfred, what the bloody hell are you going to—AHH!" Arthur couldn't finish his sentence as he left out a scream when Alfred began to tickle him relentlessly. He once again bursted out into laughter, thrashing around to get his lover to stop the nonsense but to no avail. It was a mixture of laughs and screams of his full government name for the next couple seconds before Alfred finally gave Arthur time to rest.
At that point, Arthur was entirely out of breath, his breathing hard and heavy, coughing occasionally while he recovered slowly. Alfred couldn't help but feel very proud of what he did even though he might get his ass kicked.
"Pfft. Dude, you're like—so ticklish," Alfred pointed out the obvious fact. "So, are you going to come with me when I reach the moon?" He moved on, trying to change the topic before anything bad happens to him. "Or will you watch me from here?"
"We're still on about that?!"
Night took near forever to come in the Summertime.
Arthur's fingers dangle the almost empty bottle of beer over the balcony railing of his shared apartment in Kansas. His eyes focused on the full moon, images of Alfred in his astronaut suit skipping around his head.
"For the sun casts its light onto the moon's surface for illumination. Just as the sun can shine the Earth, so does the moon, for it cannot shine alone," he was once told by Alfred, being all corny.
The apartment was eerily quiet, for the sounds of worn out speakers pitching in romantic music from the 80's was the only source of noise from inside.
They were a selection of Alfred's personal favorite songs, ranging from ones like The One That You Love to Every Breathe You Take to Iris. Even with Alfred's usually bad song choices (which were awful countries songs), the Briton had to admit his song tastes were good when it came to romance.
The wind blew on his warm body, just like it did the same night he recalled minutes ago, as if it always stood there with him since then. It was a comforting thought to imagine.
...And I meant every word I said
When I said that I love you,
I meant that I love you forever...
Keep on Loving you by REO Speedwagon was playing in the background. Truthfully, the song often made Arthur feel melancholic when he had first heard it. He didn't know why at the time, but by then it was clear to him once he could no longer see his lover up close; to witness that stupid smile of his and those beautiful blue eyes that made even the bluest skies jealous.
He truly loves Alfred. That was all there was to it. His words of "I love you" were always true and not one of them were ever a lie. The poem he'd recite to the American were all about his unrelenting love for him from a series of his favorite poetry books.
"It was always a risk to love you—I knew what they would say and all the ways they would try to keep us apart," Arthur whispered on Alfred's lips, tears falling onto the pillows beneath his head. "But the way hand fits with yours," His fingers slowly intertwined with Alfred's that hold him down, "and that feeling in my chest; always you."
Alfred tilted his head to kiss Arthur multiple times, gladly allowing himself to be immersed within Arthur's words, knowing what comes next in said poem. His body shifted around the bed, cocooning around the Briton's perfect body frame.
He pulled away, inches from his lips when he gave his lover exactly fourteen kisses, for which he received a wholesome laugh. "You kissed me once for every letter in my name, told me that in the moments that felt too complicated and out of reach," Alfred breathes on his lower lip, "you would breathe, and I'd be right there on your lips," he takes a moment to snake his arms around Alfred's shoulders, bringing him down until they were centimeters away.
Admiration filled their hearts as they gave each other an awkward laugh, for they both spoke slightly out of sync, "Forever."
Those kisses were no longer lingering on his lips. It's been long enough since they have left his senses. Too long for Arthur to remember every single detail.
A shaky sigh leaves him, regaining his attention to the illuminating sight before his eyes. The bottle in his fingers nearly slipped, so he took care of it before it fell on the ground below him and set it down with the several other bottles of beer on the table. The distance down seemed so close yet so far. It makes his head spin in a way he couldn't quite understand.
"Will I see you again if I did?" Arthur murmured out, brushing his fingers on the cold metal, but it wasn't consciously him. Was it the alcohol psychosis talking? Or was it his sober mind speaking?
His body moved on its own, his mind taking forever to process what he was doing in the first place. More of those same voices he'd been hearing for months got continuously louder, the sight of glowing faeries filling his vision, telling him to go forth. Go ahead and jump.
The same faeries that offered hallucinations that gave him sweet dreams where he could be happier with Alfred, to get away from the reality where shared memories were reduced down to just him. To relive every moment whether it be happy, saddening, or upsetting; to relive their intimacy, the realness of the touch and emotions.
He can't help the stream of tears that began to fall as he let out a choked sob. It had been long since Alfred had disappeared for his space mission. They left with bittersweet temporary goodbyes, only to never witness each other's gaze again. Sometimes it hurt to love, to lose.
Arthur still stared down, tears endlessly falling from his eyes as his breath quickens, heart beating faster. He felt sick, he wanted to get out of this hellhole. The only way he could was to leave the life behind. Spirits were real, but not the same as the actual embodiment.
Even if was just to witness Alfred all over again, he'd go.
The voices in his head were overpowering, urging him on and on, happily watching as they pushed Arthur till he stood on the balcony railings. There was nothing worth crying for anymore, knowing he could recreate memories again, knowing he could die with him in their next life once they drift into the endless void, embracing one another until their last moments.
One final breath. And for he heard —
I don't wanna sleep
I just wanna keep on lovin' you.