Chapter Text
2005.
A few years ago...
Jungkook was sitting by himself in that park, trying to entertain himself and play alone with his small skateboard. He was never that good at making friends, a little too shy to start a conversation with other kids. His mother was watching him from afar, talking to one of the neighbours who was also there.
Even though Jungkook was not really having any fun, he refused to leave. Sometimes being inside the house was too boring and this way he could, at least, enjoy the day outside. He saw a group of friends playing tag and laughing loudly and screaming each other’s names between breathless words. The kid held his skateboard near his chest, and a pang of envy reached his heart.
He missed his best friend; he missed laughing that way.
Yugyeom, his best friend, moved to another city a few weeks ago, and since then, he hasn’t really known how to make new friends. Yugyeom was also shy, but he was a bit popular, and he was good at talking, even though Jungkook knew he hated meeting new people. Jungkook was feeling quite lonely, and he even tried to ask Seokjin, his brother, for help. At that moment, he said he was too old to help Jungkook find new friends or even play with him. Jungkook rolled his eyes at remembering that.
Seokjin was only three years older than Jungkook, but, for some reason, eleven-year-old boys weren’t into playing and being friends with their little brothers anymore.
Seokjin clearly had a thing about getting old. He proudly waited for his birthday each year and liked being responsible and in charge. Jungkook was the opposite; He didn’t want to grow up that fast.
“Hey! What’s your name?” Jungkook heard the voice and looked up to where it was coming from. He held his skateboard a bit tightly.
“Hi... Uhm, I’m Jungkook… Kim Jungkook.” He paused. “Why?”
“I’m Taehyung. Kim Taehyung.” The boy smiled. “We share the same last name, that’s nice.” Jungkook smiled shyly too. “Do you want to play with us? I’m tired of seeing you all alone here and the more the merrier.”
“I don’t know any of them...” Jungkook started and looked at the boys, who were clearly chatting and looking at him.
“It’s always nice to meet other people. C’mon, Jungkook, let’s have some fun!” The boy let a boxy smile bloom on his lips. He was kind. “We’re playing tag right now, so go put your skateboard elsewhere. I’ll wait here and we’ll go together so I can introduce you to everyone.” Taehyung said with a sympathetic smile and Jungkook blinked a few times before agreeing and he ran to his mother, telling her he would play with the others.
Taehyung waited for him, like he said he would.
Jungkook liked him already.
“You’re from my school, aren’t you?” Taehyung asked when he and Jungkook were lying on the grass, trying to recover from a very tiring game of tag. They ran more than both of them could handle, and Jungkook's competitive personality made everything worse for him. He was tired, but he didn’t stop until the last of them gave up. He was shy, but he would never back down from a game.
“Yes.” Jungkook said. He’d seen Taehyung a few times. It was impossible not to. The boy was way too popular, and he was a bit taller than everyone in his class.
“Do you want to spend lunch time with me tomorrow? I don’t like to see you alone, and I know that your friend, Yugyeom-”
“I don’t need your pity.” Jungkook interrupted. His voice was a bit rough, and he quickly sat down, getting ready to stand up and run from that conversation. He wanted new friends, yes, because he liked talking and spending time with other people but if Taehyung was just trying to pity him, he would not accept it.
He was too stubborn to accept it.
“Hey, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it like that.” Taehyung’s eyes widened, and he held Jungkook’s wrist before he could stand up. “I’m just saying that you’re nice and I’d like to be your friend.” Jungkook looked into Taehyung’s eyes, searching for a hint of a lie.
But, if anything, Jungkook believed Tae was being honest, so the younger one relaxed a little.
“Huh.” He looked away. “Yeah, sure, I guess we can be friends.”
Taehyung smiled again, and Jungkook could see it with the corner of his eye.
He held himself back from smiling widely as well.
Jungkook went home talking to his mom about his new friend and how Taehyung was so nice and so cool. To be fair, it wasn’t that hard to impress an eight-year-old kid.
“Jungkook made a new friend?” Jin asked when he heard the younger one talking nonstop about the other boy. He was flipping through some pages in a random magazine.
“Yes. Taehyung is his name and he is a year older than me!” He answered and he no longer remembered that he should be angry at his brother for not wanting to help him make friends.
“That’s nice, Kookie.” That was Yoongi talking.
Yoongi and Jin were best friends, and you could say he pretty much lived in their house since his parents worked all day long and didn’t care that much about him (that was his exact words about the situation). Jungkook liked him a lot, just like everyone in his family.
Before he went to sleep, Jungkook wrote a letter (he promised he would try to write often) to Yugyeom, telling all about Taehyung and how he had fun today. He didn’t have a huge vocabulary for a nice letter, but he knew how to be objective with his words, so it worked out.
Things were better than the day before, and Jungkook slept with a smile that night.
2010
5 years later...
Taehyung and Jungkook were in their spot – a hidden place with a nice view of the sunset in the park where they met each other when they were kids –. To be fair, it was not that hidden, but people avoided going up to that place because it had no official trail to get there. They became best friends and were pretty much inseparable. They both spent almost every day together playing videogames, trying to play any sports that came to mind (Jungkook was really good at those), reading some book together – Taehyung did all the reading because Jungkook didn’t like reading and because he liked how Taehyung gets too invested in the story -, watching TV, or just annoying Jin and Yoongi.
At that moment, they were sitting on the grass, laughing and talking about everything and nothing at the same time. They needed to waste some time there because Jungkook’s parents were preparing a surprise birthday party for him.
It wasn’t a surprise anymore.
Taehyung was terrible at keeping secrets, and his brother was anything but subtle about wanting Jungkook out of the house for hours.
Jungkook was not mad about knowing the surprise. He always found it endearing how Taehyung tried his best to keep a secret from him, but always ended up telling him anyway.
“Jimin’s birthday is coming.” Taehyung said almost in a whisper after a beat of comfortable silence between them and Jungkook turned his head to look at him and no longer at the nice view in front of them.
“You do know that today is my birthday, right? Why the hell are you talking about your new friend’s birthday?” Jungkook sounded more annoyed than he really was. He liked Jimin, he really did… But Jungkook was not that good at sharing attention.
Taehyung laughed and smiled. “You’re a big baby, that’s what you are.” He chuckled. “Of course, I know, I’m actually doing a pretty great job keeping you busy for you to have a surprise birthday party later this evening.” That made Jungkook laugh. “And my new friend’s name is Jimin and you know that. Why don’t you like him? He’s always so nice to you.”
“I like him. I really do. I just...” Jungkook started but bit his lower lip to stop himself from being unfair.
“What?” The older one encouraged him to continue and Jungkook sighed; he shifted his gaze again. They didn’t keep secrets from each other (clearly, both of them were terrible at it and they could read the other easily) and that was one of the beauties of their friendship.
“I just don’t know how I feel about you replacing me while I’m still here, you know? I know he’s your age, and I know you guys have a lot in common, but it feels like you’re getting rid of me.” He blurted out what was on his mind these past few days.
“Replacing you?” Taehyung repeated the sentence in a question, genuinely trying to understand. “What the hell are you talking about? I’m doing my very best to try to make you guys friends as well. I’m not replacing anyone.”
“I’m not clueless, Tae.” The younger one said. Jungkook was a bit insecure, yes. “Since you met Jimin a few months ago, you guys just clicked, you know? It’s scary sometimes how you guys finish each other’s sentences and how you guys just seem to think like you’re one. It feels like you’re...”
“Soulmates?” Taehyung completed it and Jungkook couldn’t have said it better himself.
Taehyung and Jimin actually said it once in school, about how they were soulmates… And to be honest, Jungkook agreed. He really did.
“Yeah, like soulmates.”
“You’re jealous, it’s cute.”
“I’m not” Jungkook pouted.
“Yes, you are.” Taehyung kept looking at Jungkook, who was still pouting by his side. “I’m not replacing you, Kookie. I won’t ever replace you. We’re best friends for life, you know that.” Taehyung reasoned. “Jimin is my friend too, and we do have a special connection. I love him and I love you. It’s different, and you may be jealous just because before it was just you and me against the world and now Jimin joined us. It’s not a bad thing to surround yourself with love. He is really nice and a very caring person. He likes you and I think you’d like him too, if you gave him the chance to actually get to know you.” Taehyung tilted his head. “I think you could be really close. You have a lot in common as well.”
“I like him, Tae.” He was being honest. Jimin was always super nice to him and there was nothing not to like about him.
“I’m going to invite him to your birthday party and maybe there you both can talk? Maybe we can even play some video games together. I really want to play Celeste and I’d love to have my two best friends with me today.”
Jungkook laughed lightly. “I’m not supposed to know anything about this party, so you can pretty much do whatever you want and invite whoever you want to, right?”
“Right. You’re right.”
Jungkook was not jealous; he really wasn’t. That’s what he kept telling himself. Of course, he and Tae had other friends (Tae had a lot more, to be honest). They were not even in the same grade at school and Jungkook had just joined the baseball and handball teams. The thing was that even with all of their friends, they were like a dynamic duo and Jimin was the first one to break into Taehyung’s shell enough to make a room where before was only Jungkook’s space.
Jungkook was really trying to be against Jimin making their duo become a trio, but the smile on Taehyung’s face was enough for him to know how much Jimin made his best friend happy and he couldn’t be angry with Jimin if he was the reason why Taehyung was smiling more often than before.
“Kookie?” Taehyung called his name and the younger one woke up from his thoughts.
“Yeah?”
“Happy 13th birthday.”
“Thanks.” Jungkook answered with a warm heart. He had mixed feelings about his birthday. He didn’t like the idea of getting older, but he loved celebrating it.
“Are you ready for your party?” Taehyung asked after checking his phone. Jungkook laughed. “Please, act like you don’t know shit about this party. Your mom and Jin will flip out if they realize I told you.”
“Don’t worry. I’m great at pretending.”
Taehyung frowned. “You’re really not.”
“Shut up!” He laughed. “Let’s go.”
“Ok, I already texted Taehyungie and they might be here in twenty minutes.” Jin said loudly, more than the usual, to alert everyone. Some of their family were there and some of Jungkook's friends from school were there too.
Yoongi was placing the cake at the table while Jin’s parents were making sure everyone had a drink and a party hat. They were so stubborn that even Yoongi was wearing one. He loved that family, but sometimes they were just too extra - and it explained a lot about Seokjin’s enthusiasm in life.
“Oh, no!” Jin yelled, dramatically, and Yoongi looked at him worried. “I forgot to hang his embarrassing pictures!”
Too extra, Yoongi thought again. He smiled, though.
“It’s ok, next year you’ll have another chance.” His dad laughed lightly and Jin looked miserable. “Go help Yoongi, son. He’s doing all the work.” The older man said, and Jin nodded, getting near Yoongi, who was standing beside the cake table.
“I can’t believe you and your family dragged me to all of your parties.” He paused. “The worst part is that this party starts at five. It’s way too early for a party!”
“It’s a kid’s party, Yoongi. Jungkook's turning 13, don’t you forget, and a lot of these kids are even younger than him, I guess.” Jin looked around. They were not much older, after all. “All of these kids have bedtime, or at least they have to be home early. We will not be stuck here for long.” Jin completed and Yoongi snorted. Jin was only three years older than Jungkook, and Yoongi was only two years older, but they always saw Jungkook and their friends as babies. “I know you love our little celebrations.”
Jin wasn’t wrong. His family always treated Yoongi so well and their parents were almost like Yoongi’s second parents. His own parents didn’t seem to care much about him, and all the love he needed – and knew – came from the Kim family. Jungkook and Jin were like brothers to him and he would do anything for them, including wear a really ugly party hat after helping set up this party.
“Maybe we can go out after the party or a bit before it ends?” He looked at Yoongi. “I need to go to Sooyoung’s to return her camera anyway... And you can sleep here if you want, we could start that new game...”
“I don’t think I can.” Yoongi answered quickly, a tiny smile on his face. “Actually, I’m leaving at seven. My mom... She said we’re going to have a family dinner since it’s Saturday and neither she nor my dad are working...” Yoongi was looking at his hands while talking.
“Oh... That’s nice, right? You barely see them during the week. It’s nice that they’re making time at least on the weekend.”
“Yes, it will be nice.”
Jin smiled at that. Yoongi needed time with his family and Jin knew how much he missed them, even though they lived in the same house, and how lonely he felt. His parents were never the ones to care much about him and Yoongi never kept expectations high when it came to his parents. Jin knew that these dinners mostly ended in Yoongi crying or fighting with them, but it was where they talked and pretended to be a functioning family and that made Yoongi happy for weeks.
“Don’t make me regret helping.” He said when he noticed that Jin was getting closer to hug him. “I’m serious. I don’t want any hugs from you. I said one hug a week is more than enough!” He was getting louder as Seokjin was embracing him. “You’re impossible!” Yoongi tried to get away from his arms, but was interrupted when Jin’s mother started turning off the lights and asking for everyone to stay quiet.
“He’s coming!” She almost jumped in excitement and Jin was still holding Yoongi.
Jungkook entered the room and a loud cheer echoed in that living room. Taehyung was fast getting a party hat for himself and another one for Jungkook, who was doing a pretty good job acting surprised.
Jin (finally) let go of Yoongi and went to hug his younger brother.
“My baby brother is getting old!” Jin said, making Jungkook scoff before saying:
“You’re just three years older, hyung!”
“Still older.” Yoongi laughed at that, and one of Jungkook’s friends started singing “happy birthday” while Jungkook’s mother was making way for him to get near the cake.
They cheered and Jungkook served cake to everyone. As soon as he got a plate for himself, his mother asked:
“Why am I feeling that you knew about this party?” Jungkook bit his lower lip, trying to suppress a smile. “Taehyung told you, didn’t he?” She asked again and Jungkook nodded, making both of them laugh.
“You know he can’t help himself. I don’t know why you tell him if you want it to be a secret.”
“I should be mad at him for spoiling the surprise, but I’m happy that you have such a good friend.” She said, looking at Taehyung, who was talking to some friends across the living room.
Jungkook smiled too. Taehyung really was a great friend.
The best one.
It was like he heard his thoughts. Taehyung shifted his gaze to look at him and said loud enough for him to hear: “Kookie, Jimin’s at the door!”
“I should get that.” He said, and his mother nodded at him.
It didn’t take long before Kim's living room became a karaoke and all of the kids there were singing their hearts out.
Jungkook was having fun.
“Hey, are you still here?” Jin asked, confused and quickly looking at the clock on the wall, marking 7:40 pm. “You do know that you’re late for your dinner, right? I thought you left already, and I was not even angry because I knew how important this was to you.” Yoongi was sitting on the couch watching some of the kids playing cards and a boy named Minho was tied with Jungkook. Both of them were competitive as hell and it was fun to watch Taehyung and Jimin cheering for Jungkook. Their friendship was cute, Yoongi thought.
Jungkook was really trying to remain calm with all of Minho’s teasing. Yoongi knew Jungkook and knew how he was not the one to be calm, he was a very explosive kid. He was nice, polite and all, but was still learning how to keep calm when things didn’t go his way.
He never really got into fights, but he, for sure, was ready for all of them.
Yoongi was impressed he didn’t throw the cards on Minho’s face or something like that.
“Actually, there’s no dinner anymore.” Yoongi finally answered after standing up and walking to an empty corner in the living room, followed by Jin. He didn’t want to talk about this with other people around. “My mom sent me a text saying that she was sorry, but she was caught up with some other things and forgot about it. I guess I can stay here to play that game you said-”
“I’m sorry, Yoongi.”
“It’s fine.” Yoongi said with a sad smile, shaking his hand. “I just need to get some clothes at home. Can we go there after going to Sooyoung’s?” Jin nodded. “Why the fuck isn’t she here anyway? I thought you guys were dating.”
“We just kissed twice. It’s not really dating.” Jin’s eyes went wide. “Right? I mean, I don’t know what we are… I’ve never dated anyone.”
“Well, you better figure it out.” Yoongi said. “Talk to her.”
“I will.” Jin stated. “And there’s no way I’d introduce anyone to my mom if I’m not going to marry the person. You know how she is. She gets too excited about little things.” That made Yoongi laugh because Jin was just the same.
Jin talked a bit more about Sooyoung and after a beat of silence, Yoongi felt a bit jittery. He had to bite his tongue to stop himself from telling Jin what had happened yesterday.
It was not the moment, he thought.
And he was a bit scared.
“Are you ok?” Jin asked, watching his friend with a confused look.
“Yes, I mean, it’s nothing important. I was just thinking about something.” He paused. “Come on, let’s play with them!” He suggested and Jin looked at him for a moment, trying to read the other’s eyes and mind. Yoongi was never that excited about games and hated them, even more so if they were games that he was not good at.
And he was terrible with cards.
Jin was going to ask why the hell he wanted to play cards, but stopped himself when the only explanation was: Yoongi was trying to avoid conversation about his family and wanted to be distracted by something. Anything.
Seokjin was good at it. “Let’s go.” He agreed.
He was right, Yoongi was trying to avoid conversation, but it was not about his family this time.
“Hey, we have to go.” Taehyung said, getting up from the floor after checking the clock on the wall. He and Jimin were the last ones at the party. It was way past 11 pm, and all of his friends had gone home because it was indeed getting late.
“Thanks for inviting me to the party, Jungkook. It was so much fun! I’m glad I came.”
“I’m glad you came too, Jimin.” He said truthfully. Jimin was even funnier than he had anticipated and it was good to have all of his friends together playing and singing. It was better than expected.
“I’m happy Jin managed to rent a karaoke box. You love singing. It’s nice to hear you in your element sometimes.”
Jungkook loved singing and he was good at it, that much was true, but it was not really his element. Not a lot of people knew about Jungkook’s talent; he never tried to join a choir or sing in public without the fun of karaoke to back him up.
Jungkook was always too focused on sports, which he also loved. He was not embarrassed by singing or anything like that. He just never gave it a chance, not a real one… And he was not that great at being the center of attention. Eyes on him made him quite nervous and even though he was not that shy anymore (he got better at making friends and talking to strangers), he still wouldn’t consider himself an extrovert or an introvert with great communication skills.
Being on a team was easier than being on a stage, for sure.
Taehyung was his number one fan. He always asked Jungkook to sing when they were hanging out, and he did his very best to show him new music he’d be listening to.
“I’m glad you’re getting along.” Taehyung said, taking him out of his own thoughts, clapping happily and Jungkook blushed right away. “We should really go now. I’ll text you, and maybe we could hang out tomorrow?”
“That’d be nice. You can come too, Jimin. If you want to.” Jungkook invited him and that made Jimin smile even more.
“I’d love to!” He answered.
Taehyung was smiling at Jungkook and loudly said goodbye to Jungkook’s parents before leaving.
At the door, Taehyung hugged Jungkook tightly for a minute or more. Such a long hug would be awkward if it weren’t with Taehyung. Jungkook felt safe and comfortable in Taehyung’s arms.
He always did.
And Taehyung liked hugs a lot.
“As much as I love seeing you with so much PDA, we gotta go.” It was Jimin talking and Taehyung finally let go of Jungkook and said almost in a whisper:
“Happy birthday again.”
“Ok, what is it?” Jin asked after hearing Yoongi turn on the mattress they set up on the floor with comfortable bedsheets and covers in his room.
He’d been moving for hours now.
“Are you uncomfortable? You can sleep on the bed-“
“That’s not it.”
Seokjin was trying really hard not to get annoyed in his sleepy state. “Why the fuck can’t you sleep? It’s 3 am, Yoongi. You’re always the first one to fall asleep.”
“I’m sorry. I just can’t sleep.”
“I can see that.” Jin sat on the bed and turned the lamp on his bedside table so he could actually look at Yoongi. “Why is that? Is something bothering you? If you’re not uncomfortable, then what is it?”
“I have to tell you something.” Yoongi was not looking at Jin. His eyes fixated on the ceiling.
Jin was not that great with real talks and by the looks of it, Yoongi was nervous. He tried to lighten up the mood by saying, “Oh, please, don’t tell me you have a boner, you can just go to the bathroom and do your thing there. It’s normal. I don’t care, real-“ Jin said, teasing the younger but Yoongi was not in the mood. Seokjin’s silly smile faltered. “What is it? Why are you so serious? Are you feeling unwell?”
“Forget about it.” Yoongi rolled his eyes and sighed, annoyed. “I guess I’ll just sleep in the living room so I won't bother you any longer.” He quickly stood up. Really quickly.
Jin widened his eyes and, tripping on the covers, he managed to reach Yoongi before he left the room. “You’re not going anywhere. What is it?” Jin asked. The only light in the room was from the lamp he turned on, and, even in the dark, Jin could see Yoongi getting red, blushing a little.
“I kissed someone yesterday.” The younger one blurted out and sat at the end of Jin's bed. He avoided Jin’s eyes at all costs.
It took a second for Jin to understand. “Oh?” He didn’t understand why it would keep Yoongi awake and why he decided to share this news in the middle of the night when Seokjin was really sleepy, but it was his best friend opening his heart and Jin would not take it lightly.
“Yeah.” He bit his lower lip, still not looking at him.
“Wait.” Jin was thinking and Yoongi rolled his eyes. “This was your very first kiss, right?” Jin asked in a low tone of voice, and getting closer to Yoongi, sitting on his bed right by Yoongi’s side.
“Yes.” Yoongi answered and Jin had a smile blooming on his lips. Jin’s first kiss was almost two weeks ago, with Sooyoung, and Seokjin made a pretty big deal about it.
He didn’t like her romantically, not yet at least, but he was excited about kissing. The day it happened, he felt a bit guilty for not feeling something real towards her and sharing that kiss. He was supposed to feel something for her, wasn’t he?
“Ok.” Jin started again, watching Yoongi's every move. “And how was it?”
“I’m not describing my first kiss to you.”
“Stop being boring, I told you about mine with Sooyoung.”
“I didn’t ask how soft her lips were and I definitely didn’t need to hear you saying that you thought your first kiss must have been great for her because you have plump lips.” Yoongi chuckled.. “I did not need you describing the movements of your tongue either. It was just too much information. None of it was useful.”
“So you were listening.” Jin pointed that out because Yoongi was with a terrified face, pleading for Jin to stop talking about his first kiss when it happened. At one point, Jin was certain that Yoongi was not listening anymore.
“Of course I was. You’re just too loud for me not to listen.” He teased and Jin hit his arm lightly. “I regret listening to all of it, though. I should have run while I still had the time. I’m scarred for life.”
“Come on, Yoongi, how was it? And, when the hell did this happen? You were with me all day long yesterday- Was it yesterday?”
“It was after school.”
“I can’t believe you!” Jin exclaimed. “I was starving! I can’t believe you made me wait for you when you were making out with someone! You’re unbelievable!”
“I was in the studio room. I didn’t lie.” Yoongi bit his lower lip, fidgeting with his hands. The nervous tone appeared again. “It happened there.”
“Ok, so I’m gonna ask again, was it good?”
“It was better than I expected. Your description of a kiss was not that good. I was ready for the worst.”
Jin ignored the poking and continued: “That’s nice. I guess. Is it?”
“Yes, it is.” Yoongi was now staring at his own hands, fidgeting with his fingers.
“As much as I love hearing how you made me almost starve to death for you to kiss someone... I don’t understand why you can’t sleep.”
“The kiss is not what is keeping me awake. It’s your reaction that I’m worried about.” Yoongi confessed. “Your reaction, your parents, Jungkook’s, my parents, oh God, my parents...” Yoongi was speaking fast, his voice trembling.
Jin was confused as fuck.
“My reaction? Their reaction?” Jin asked. “About you having your first kiss? What? What kind of reaction were you expecting, what are-”
“I kissed a guy, Jin.” Yoongi blurted out louder than he expected. “I’m pretty sure I’m super gay.” He completed almost in a whisper, trying to laugh lightly.
The older one was indeed surprised; he would be lying if he said otherwise.
Actually, at that very moment, he was more surprised by how he had never noticed. Now that he is thinking about it, Yoongi had never shown any kind of interest in the girls of their school, but he always thought Yoongi was just too shy for his own good.
Clearly, he was wrong since the younger was kissing some guy in the studio and making Jin starve outside of school, waiting for him.
“Please, say something, Jin-hyung.” Yoongi said, looking at Jin this time, his voice was a bit low and unsure.
Was he afraid?
“I can’t believe it.” He started and Yoongi held his breath, nervous. “I’m really offended.” Yoongi listened and did not have a reaction. He could feel his heart dropping and beating loudly. “I can’t believe you were nervous about telling me this, Yoongi.” He paused and searched for Yoongi’s eyes. “Look at me, please.” Yoongi did, a frown on his face and confusion all over his once worried eyes. “I’m sorry if I ever made you feel unsafe or like I’d hate you. I don’t know why you thought-“
“You didn’t do anything, hyung, I was just nervous. I still am.”
“I love you, Yoongi. You’re like a younger brother to me, you know that.”
That made Yoongi’s heart warm, and he took a deep breath. Relieved. It was way too hard for him to talk about feelings, so it took a lot of courage to speak up.
“You’re awesome.” Yoongi said almost in a whisper and Jin smiled widely.
“Is that a compliment I’m hearing?” Yoongi laughed at that, even with his wet eyes. “All I want is for you to be happy.” Jin paused. “When did you-“
“I caught myself thinking about this guy, the one I kissed yesterday, and tried to sort out what was happening with my feelings. The answer came easily. I’m gay, Jin.” He stated. “It’s great to say it out loud.” The younger one smiled. He was still nervously fidgeting with his fingers, but he seemed a lot more relaxed now.
“Thank you for trusting and telling me, Yoongi.”
Yoongi nodded and both of them smiled.
“So, who is he?”
“I’m not telling you.” Yoongi chuckled.
“You have to tell me! I’m your best friend!”
“It isn’t a big deal, I doubt we’re going to kiss again. It just happened, it was a moment thing.”
“But you just said that you caught yourself thinking about him for a while now.” Jin paused. “Do you like him?”
“Ok, we’re not talking about this.”
“Oh my god, you like him!”
“I don’t!” Yoongi defended himself fast. “I mean, I like him, but not this way. I thought about him because I knew for a fact that he likes guys as well. He’s hot, and he kissed me. That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.” Yoongi said, blushing again.
Oh, how he hated talking about this kind of stuff.
“I’m going to find out who he is. You’ll see.” Yoongi rolled his eyes, and Jin laughed lightly before saying, “Can I share something with you too?”
“Oh, if it’s about tongues, kisses or love... Please, don’t.” Yoongi refuted and Jin laughed a bit more.
“I don’t like Sooyoung and I don’t want her to be my girlfriend. I mean, she’s nice and a very good listener, very good kisser, but I just don’t feel what I’m supposed to feel when I kiss her.” Jin was rambling fast, and then he looked right into Yoongi’s eyes. “I don’t feel a thing when I’m with her or when we kiss... It’s good to kiss her, but shouldn’t I feel something? I don’t know, maybe I’m just too romantic.“
“You’re rambling.” Yoongi stopped the older. “Jin, you kissed twice. It’s ok. Just tell her you don’t want anything serious and that’s it, or think to yourself if you want to give this a chance or not. You have a whole life to kiss other people and try to feel the things you think you’re supposed to feel.” Yoongi finished his sentence in a mocking tone. Jin didn’t like it and just sighed with a weak smile. Yoongi saw that and continued: “Stop thinking so loud. It’s ok, Jin. You don’t like her. It’s ok. There will be plenty of people for you to kiss from now on.
“Let’s sleep?” He asked, and Yoongi agreed, understanding that their sharing moment was over. Jin adjusted himself in the bed and Yoongi lay back down on the mattress on the floor.
Jin turned off the lamp.
Ten minutes of silence until Jin heard Yoongi moving again.
He was about to scold Yoongi and maybe tie him down or something when he felt Yoongi’s body pressed against his and making him squeeze himself a little for the other to fit in the bed.
The last time they shared a bed was when Yoongi was 8 and had a nightmare. After that, both of them decided not to sleep together anymore. Yoongi really liked space, and Jin always ended up hugging him in the middle of the night.
“Why are you-“
“Just because”
That was it.
Yoongi didn’t need to say much for Jin to know. The younger was still feeling vulnerable, and it was a tough night for him. Being awake for all of those hours thinking of what to say... It was exhausting.
Both of them were exhausted.
And Yoongi really didn’t mind if Jin wanted to hold him, actually, he really wanted a hug… And he had a feeling Seokjin also needed to be hugged.
“Good night, Yoonie.”
“Good night, hyung.”
"Just one more thing," Jin started. "Next time you decide to make out instead of going home, let me know so I don't starve to death." That made Yoongi laugh out loud and Jin hit him lightly. "I'm serious."