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It started as something to worry about in the back of Nanami’s mind but blossomed into the hideous creature that Nanami's insecurities and fear made real. She had flown too close to the sun, Nanami had let people get too close to her even though Nanami swore that it would never happen again. Not after her parents and her family died in front of her, not after Haurchefant died in her arms protecting her.
And yet it happened. Some foolish hope of hers urged her to bring the Scions close. That ever growing want and need to have the security of family again. It clouded her judgement and now she was paying the price for it.
Thancred was the first to fall, his form laid stock still, no matter how much Nanami shook him, no matter how much aether the lalafell gave him. No matter how many tears Nanami shed onto his still body. Her pleas weren't answered, it was just this voice who pleaded for her, who wanted her help.
Nanami didn't resent the voice, not at first. She started to resent it more and more when it happened again, piercing her thoughts like an arrow, flooding her vision with the same plea, the same call for her to help this person, this to throw wide the gates. When Nanami came to, Urianger was the one that had been taken from her, her closest confidant, the one who kept her doubts at bay.
The same thing happened when Nanami shook the Elezen. The same thing happened when she infused him with her aether. The same thing happened when she pleaded and cried for him to wake up.
Fear gripped her heart as she looked at her traveling companion, the other Warrior of Light J'leejah Fijah, wishing to both the Elementals and the Mothercrystal that she would not be taken away from her too. Nanami had almost lost J’leejah at the battle of Rhaglr’s Reach, where the miqo'te had foolishly stepped forward to protect her and was sliced almost in twain. Almost in parallel to Haurchefant, but Nanami was stronger this time. Nanami could heal J’leejah, J'leejah was strong, she can fight this.
It took her a while for the lalafell's feelings for the miqo'te to rekindle, since Nanami had smothered them as soon as Nanami and J’leejah met, not wanting to ruin any chance of friendship. They were further smothered when Nanami had fallen in love with Lord Haurchefant Greystone, and the grief of losing him prevented Nanami from loving again for a time. However, adventuring with J'leejah had blossomed new feelings that Nanami let flourish this time, even though it scared her.
They grew more intense by the day, Nanami letting herself get more and more reckless, more intense touches, acts of service and the lalafell doing things she wouldn’t do for anyone else for J’leejah. The feelings came to a head after the battle of Rhaglr’s Reach when Nanami’s heart stopped when she saw J'leejah struck down by Zenos.
Nanami acted quickly, using her conjury training and white magic to staunch the wound and in an act of inhuman strength, after J'leejah had stabilised, hefted the miqo'te up and carried her to the medical tent.
There Nanami started her vigil.
Nanami then spent many sleepless nights, infusing J’leejah with healing aether, changing the bandages and cleaning the wound ever so gently. Nanami refused help, even telling every other chirugeon, Krile and Alphinaud that she could handle it. That Nanami could fix this. A selfish request but Nanami couldn't bear the thought of losing someone she loved yet again because they wanted to protect her.
Slowly, the wound knitted together and the day that Nanami heard J’leejah take a waking breath and make eye contact, Nanami had to look away before the lalafell did something reckless. Reckless as in smothering the miqo'te with kisses and tears of gratitude that J’leejah was alive.
But that was the past, and due to Nanami’s ministrations, J’leejah looked like she never got a wound as gruesome as the one the miqo'te had.
Currently relief and fear alike flooded Nanami’s system when the rest of her companions fell into the death-like state as all of the others did but J’leejah didn't. J’leejah stood stalwart as always, even though Nanami did notice a change in J'leejah’s aether, a darkness wrapping around it like a cradle.
Nanami wanted to ask if J'leejah knew that her aether was being eclipsed by darkness but decided against it after noticing how tense J’leejah was during this whole ordeal.
In fact, with each fallen Scion, Nanami saw that J’leejah's aether had become more and more ensconced by that darkness. As if J’leejah was accepting someone else's help.
The events of the battle at Ghimytl Dark made the tension even worse, Estinien barely making it to get them both out of harm’s way.
It agitated Nanami to know that this person was so adamant on trying to take everyone away from her that she swore that this person will answer for their crimes.
Eventually the person who had been calling for them was finally successful, and side by side J'leejah and Nanami traveled together to the place where their friends were, the First of the reflections Nanami was later told.
Nanami didn't care, she didn't care about what this mysterious person had to say even though he sounded vaguely familiar and even smelled a little familiar as well.
She confronted him in the Ocular, fingers on her aetherotransformer, the other on her gun, ready to draw it at any moment.
“ Where are they?” Nanami asked, her gaze dark and her voice serious. “Where is he?”
“I don’t know what you mean.” The stranger said, the Crystal Exarch, he called himself.
“This is the Crystal Tower, you stole it or at least transported it here. Someone was locked in here, where is he?” Nanami said as she stepped forward, her anger permeating her every word and step.
J’leejah stepped next to her, before taking the hand that was on the aetherotransformer and lacing it with her own, giving it a squeeze. It gave Nanami some pause, and the lalafell dropped her other hand that clutched the gun but replaced it as soon as the Crystal Exarch spoke again.
“ There was no one here when we entered to investigate, I must apologize.” They said, which made Nanami even more agitated, and J'leejah tried to hold her back now.
Nanami tried to take a breath but her fury was growing too great for her. Nanami needed to calm down so she could still speak properly. If Nanami got too upset, she would become incomprehensible and her questions would not be answered.
The lalafell then focused on trying to escape J’leejah's grip but the miqo'te was slightly stronger than her, and to Nanami’s frustration, the miqo’te wasn't willing to let go of her that easily.
In fact, J'leejah moved to wrap Nanami into an embrace, which agitated Nanami even more but eventually the lalafell relented.
Nanami needed to get her answers somehow and putting multiple bullets into the one person who knew the location of her family wasn't going to help.
Taking a breath and counting to three, Nanami looked up at the Crystal Exarch again, emotions slightly controlled.
“Since you don't know where the keeper of the tower went, where are the rest of my friends? The ones you took from me when you were foolishly trying to grasp straws.” Nanami said, calmy at first. Her rage soon built up again as the lalafell remembered what happened at Ghimytl Dark.
“You nearly killed both of us, you know. We were facing off against one of the most powerful Garleans. He was going to take the opportunity that you gave him to get rid of us, once and for all.” Nanami then spat, relishing in the slight change of emotion that the Crystal Exarch gave, before he spoke again.
“I apologize that my methods were......uncoordinated. As for your friends, they have settled in nicely, and made themselves useful in several parts of Norvandt. One of them even had the same reaction as you, the one with the red ribbon in her hair. I can still feel the bruises from the beating she gave me.” The Crystal Exarch said in a calm voice, seemingly unfazed by the venomous demeanour and tone Nanami had given him.
That's my girl. Nanami thought to herself with a smile. Fight the good fight, Ali.
The Crystal Exarch then tapped his staff twice on the ground and launched into an explanation on where the other Scions were in hopes of soothing Nanami’s fears.