Chapter Text
Himiko sat on her bed staring at her hands, idly extending and retracting her claws as her mind wandered. It was strange to think there was a whole part of her quirk, part of herself, she hadn’t known about just two weeks ago.
She was a heteromorph, a cat heteromorph specifically.
There had been a time, when Himiko was a child, that she suspected it. Her cat-like eyes and fangs were enough to make any kid curious. She had been no different.
One day, before the rest of her quirk manifested, Himiko decided to ask her parents. They denied it immediately, scolding her for even thinking that she was, in her mother’s words, an animal. The memory made something twist in her gut. Her mother sounded so disgusted by the idea that little Himiko nodded along and pushed her questions into the far corner of her mind to be forgotten.
She didn’t ask again after that.
Perhaps her mother truly believed that her daughter wasn’t a heteromorph. After all, Himiko had gotten this part of her quirk from her father who had eyes just like her. At least that was her guess. His teeth had always been sensitive, as though he’d had fangs like her but filed them down. Then there were the scars on his fingers and the pain that accompanied them. It wasn’t something she questioned as a kid, but looking back the truth was pretty obvious.
Her father had himself declawed.
There was no way he hadn’t seen the signs that his daughter was a heteromorph just like him. He knew, but he kept it a secret anyways.
If it hadn’t been for Keigo, Himiko might have never learned the truth. After leaving the HPSC and joining the League officially, Tenko had put the man in charge of training everyone. They had to get ready to break Kurogiri out of Tartarus.
In the heat of her first training session, the claws just sort of happened. She didn’t remember much about it. One moment she was in the heat of the chase, the hunt, the next it was over and a set of retractable claws decorated her fingertips. Himiko wanted to be excited. She wanted to love and embrace this new part of herself, but her parents’ shame and disapproval still lurked in the back of her mind.
This sucks, she thought. I almost miss the brain fog.
As it turned out, many of the foods that are toxic for animals have the same effect on some heteromorphs. It wasn’t something Himiko had known until Spinner brought it up over dinner one night, but it made sense. Then Spinner mentioned that onions made him anemic.
It didn’t take long for someone to realize that Himiko’s blood lust was a result of anemia due to poor nutrition.
Ever since they changed her diet, Himiko could think clearly. She could be around people without the sound of their heart beats or smell of their blood becoming completely overwhelming. Before, her thoughts had been more like feelings or instincts; they didn’t have words unless she concentrated or spoke them aloud. Now though, Toga had a whole inner monologue.
It was great. Except all the wordless thoughts and feelings had a voice, and it seemed intent on making up for lost time.
Most of the time she thought about her parents.
They were dead now. Himiko was happy about that. She truly was… but she also felt something else, something she couldn’t quite put into words.
It had all started when Dabi brought a mysterious woman going by the name Yuki-onna to the League. He claimed she just needed a place to stay under the radar for a little while. The resemblance between the two was uncanny, so it wasn’t a surprise to find out they were related. It was a surprise when they finally found out that she was none other than Rei Todoroki.
Himiko didn’t care though. Yuki was kind, and when Himiko told her about her blood cravings Yuki didn’t turn away in disgust. When she told her about her partners, Yuki just wrapped her in a warm hug and apologized that the world had been so cruel to her. She promised that she wouldn’t let Himiko’s parents hurt her ever again.
It was the next morning that the murder of her parents made the headlines. Her parents had been frozen to death before the house was torched by Dabi with the two of them still inside. The memory of it still made her feel warm and loved. No one had gone out of their way like that for her other than the League of Villains.
Himiko was glad they were gone, but somehow she felt sad about it too.
I wonder if my parents ever felt sorry for what they did to me, even if it was right before they died.
Dabi and Yuki never told her what her parents’ last words had been. At least, she didn’t remember if they did. A lot of Himiko’s memories from before her diet change were a little hazy.
It didn’t matter though. Even if they did regret it, they were dead now and the dead can’t repent.
It doesn’t matter, Himiko. She tried to tell herself. They’re dead. It doesn’t matter if they were guilty.
But it did.
Himiko flopped back on her bed with a sigh as different versions of her parents’ final moments passed through her mind.
In some they cursed her name until the bitter end. In others though, they insisted that they’d somehow done everything out of love.
That’s not what real love is like.
Himiko knew that now, but a part of her still hoped her parents had said something like that before they died. She wasn’t quite sure why.
Thinking like this wasn’t doing her any good.
Slowly, she pulled herself out of bed and brushed herself off. Himiko had to know. Even though it had been months. Even if she’d been told before. Himiko needed someone to tell her again. To tell her what her parents said before they died. To tell her that maybe, at some point, they had cared.
Dabi slept like shit last night. He’d dragged himself out of bed at Keigo’s insistence to grab some breakfast. His boyfriend might be hanging out downstairs, but Dabi still felt dead to the world, so he was going back to fucking bed and no one could stop him.
He’d almost made it back to their apartment when he felt a hand on his wrist. Ready to tell whoever it was to fuck off, Dabi turned around and saw Toga.
Normally, he had no problem telling the brat to leave him alone, but he could tell something was wrong. She looked serious for once, not a hint of playfulness in her expression. If anything, Toga seemed nervous.
God help me, I did not sleep enough for whatever is about to happen.
After a beat of silence Toga finally spoke. “Did my parents say anything before they died?”
Fuck.
There had been a time when Dabi had expected this question, back in the weeks following the deaths of Toga’s parents. He’d actually put a lot of thought into how he’d respond. Because despite being an unapologetic asshole, he had a soft spot for the blond brat.
It had been months since then, and the answer he’d so carefully crafted was lost to him in his exhaustion.
God damnit.
Dabi let out a long sigh and leaned against the wall, resigned to at least hear the brat out. “Why do you want to know all of a sudden?”
And why do you look so scared?
“It doesn’t matter,” Toga pushed, shaking head. “I just need to know. Please.”
Dabi didn’t have the energy to unpack whatever was causing the urgency in her voice. Instead he looked away for a moment, trying to organize his thoughts before leaning down to look her in the eye.
“Listen, I’m fucking exhausted,” Dabi said. “I can give you the short version if you want, but it’ll probably be shit and upsetting because I’m tired and your parents are assholes. If you wait and until I get some more sleep, I can tell you later and actually do a half decent job of it.”
Toga looked at him for a long time before turning her gaze to the floor. “…Okay, I’ll wait then.” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
That wasn’t the response he’d been expecting. Why bother waiting when she could go downstairs and ask Rei instead. After all, his mom was arguably more involved in the whole killing parent murder thing. Dabi had thought Toga caught him by coincidence on her way to ask Rei, but this implied that Toga had sought him out. That she wanted to hear it from Dabi, not his mom. He wasn’t sure how to feel about that.
Okay well, fuck dealing with that right now. Sleep first, emotions later.
Dabi pulled himself from his thoughts and began formulating a plan. “Okay, how about we talk tonight then.”
Toga’s face brightened. “You’re the best Dabi, thank you so much!”
“You’re welcome and all that jazz,” Dabi sighed as a twinge of guilt curled in his gut.
She sure is excited to hear something that will probably break her heart… This is gonna fucking suck.
Dabi shook his head.
Focus. Sleep first, emotions later.
“Alright, how about this” he continued, pulling out his phone. “I’ll text Keigo to let him know you’ve got permission to come into our apartment and wake me up if I’m still asleep by 11pm tonight. That work for you?”
“Yep, sounds great!” Toga agreed with a smile that looked just a bit forced.
“Alright, I’m gonna get some fucking sleep then,” he said, turning to head back to his apartment.
Toga’s slow steps echoed down the hall as Dabi finally reached his and Keigo’s apartment. He paused. It would be so easy to open the door and go straight to bed. It sounded fucking fantastic in fact, but he turned around instead.
“Hey Toga,” he called.
She stopped, turning on her heel to face him again.
”Don’t just… Fucking sit in your room all day stressing about this shit,” he continued. “I get that you don’t want to tell me what brought this on, but it’s clearly bothering you. So, just talk to someone or something. We’ve all been fucked over and hurt by people, and we’ve all got our own ways of dealing with it. Maybe someone will have some words of wisdom for you or something.”
With that Dabi turned open the door to his apartment to go to bed.
At least, he was going to do that.
He only got two steps into his apartment before Toga almost knocked him over as she tackled him into a hug.
“Oh, Dabi,” she teased. “You do care.”
Normally he would protest and fight off the little gremlin, but it was nice to hear Toga sound more like herself. Not that Dabi would ever admit that. If anyone ever asked, he’d claim he was just too tired to bother.
Toga released him soon after and left the apartment, closing the door behind her.
With that Dabi was finally free to get some rest. Though as he crawled into bed, a thought crossed his mind. With a groan, he pulled out his phone, typed out a quick message to Keigo, and tossed it aside.
Then, at long last, Dabi surrendered himself to the sweet oblivion of sleep.
From: Touya
8:37 AM
twll the trst of the vastards that ill ash em if thryr diks to togga tday
It took Keigo a moment to decipher his boyfriend's message. He couldn’t help but chuckle. For all of Touya’s posturing, he really did care about the girl.
Keigo finished the last of his breakfast and glanced at Rei across the table.
“Dabi is asking everyone to be nice to Himiko today,” he said.
Rei’s brow furrowed in concern. “Did he say why?”
Keigo shook his head. “No, but he mentioned that he and Himiko are going to talk about something when he wakes up. He never said what it was though.”
”Hm…” Rei leaned back in her chair, pausing thoughtfully. “Do you think anyone would mind me taking over cooking dinner tonight? I could try and make one of her favorites, though I’m not sure we have all the ingredients.”
Keigo chuckled, “If anything, Tenko would love to hear he’s been relieved of cooking duty.”
“You’re absolutely right,” Rei laughed along with him.
“I bet Twice would be happy to grab some stuff from the store if you end up needing anything. If not him then someone else can,” he said before hastily adding, “Not that you can’t go yourself of course.”
“I know Keigo,” she assured him. “Thank you.”
“Not a problem.”
After clearing away his dishes, Keigo headed off to give a… less censored version of Touya’s message to the rest of the League.