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Programs were not meant to dream, at least, Ares thought they weren’t
He didn’t actually need to sleep, the Dillinger grid had enough energy to provide to its inhabitants, so he spent most of his break periods reviewing and analyzing the information he gathered during his missions in the outside world. Rarely did he allow himself a moment to just lay down on his base and exist in silence and even then, he didn’t really sleep or dream, he just laid there in a comfortable silence barely interrupted by the sound of his circuits processing.
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It wasn’t until after the fight with Athena and her army, that the concept of dreams caught Ares attention.
He discovered that the (im)permanence code did much more than just extending his life support beyond its 29 minutes limit, it also gave him many characteristics he thought exclusive to users. His body could be damaged now and wounds required treatment, he needed to eat regularly and he needed to sleep every day to recover and gather energy for the following day.
The first time he slept was the night of Athena’s defeat, after a quick visit to the local hospital with Eve to make sure neither of them broke anything important, they went to Eve’s penthouse. Once there, she arranged the guest room for him to stay, giving him some thick blankets and enough pillows to build a fortress. She got him to bed in spite of Ares’ totally justified complaints about how he should stay awake to keep guard for the rest of the night. Perhaps it was the sustained exhaustment from the day, the difficulty of adapting to his now-human-like body or just how terribly warm and nice the blankets felt around him, but after a few minutes of staying still, his body fully relaxed, letting go of the tension that sore his muscles, closing his eyes little by little, until the realm of dreams took a hold of him
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It was dark, it was cold and Ares, was scared
The sensation was oddly familiar, every time he lost in combat or he ran out of time, his body disintegrated and turned into blacked ash, his data would transfer to the Grid where he would be rebuilt anew, and for a very brief moment, he found himself in the same place he was right now, but unlike those times, this wasn’t a brief instant before “waking up”. The darkness extended in every direction without a visible limit —couldn’t see—, the surrounding coldness took his breath away and asphyxiated him —couldn’t breathe—, his body didn’t respond to his commands —couldn’t move— and a feeling of absolute finality —death— took over his mind. He was panicking, the consequences of his wish finally caught up to him, he could die now, he wouldn’t be turned off or temporarily suspended anymore. Now he would stop being alive and there wouldn’t be a way back, no backup copy, there wouldn’t be anything anymore.
And, Ares didn’t want to die. He never liked the feeling of disintegration but now that he only had one shot, the idea paralyzed him —There were so many things he wanted to see, that he wanted to do, feelings he wanted to experience. He had gone so far, created as the ultimate soldier, Dillinger industries’ magnum opus, he now carried the permanence code deep within himself —dying in his sleep due to exhaustion would be a terribly cruel joke told by fate itself. Besides, his death would have bigger repercussions than just his demise ¿What would happen to Eve?, while it is true that they defeated Athena and Dillinger's Grid got destroyed, they didn’t know about Julian’s whereabouts and were well aware of the man’s lack of respect for boundaries when it came to getting what he wanted. Users were so fragile, their bodies were made of soft flesh, their lives were short, their feelings reigned over reason and yet, they lived as if they were invincibles.
Eve’s compassion for everyone and everything around her, her desire to help those who needed it made the world a better place, made Ares a better person. Just the idea of losing her hurt him more than any weapon ever could, a deep ache in his chest where his heart should be. He couldn’t bear to live in a world where she didn’t. What do I need time for, if I can’t even spend it with the person I love appreciate the most?. Anguish burned him from the inside out, but thinking about Eve Kim alleviated the pain just a little, so he thought about her some more.
Eve was strong, stubborn and incredibly brave. When she lost her sister, she kept going, leading Emcom and completing her sister’s research. Despite her injuries and her lack of combat experience, she stayed with Ares during the fight against Athena. When he hunted her down to obtain the code, during his last moments she looked at him with empathy instead of horror.
Feelings are truly a transcendental thing, for it seemed that Eve’s compassion followed Ares into his dreams — A light emerged from the depths of darkness and presented itself in front of Ares, it looked like the bit he found on Flynn’s Grid, but instead of beeping sounds, It had Eve’s voice. The words spoken were unclear, but the sound was identical, the cadence unmistakable, the sound waves bounced through the dark, putting down the flames that burned Ares from within. Little by little, not sure how, he managed to reach the bit and it transformed into a silhouette, shaped like Eve’s. It was illuminated by a warm light, giving it an ethereal and grandiose look, akin to the moon shining above the sea. It extended its arms and Ares found himself in a warm and comforting hug. The silhouette continued to speak and while Ares couldn’t understand the words being said, he could feel the vibrations of the voice and the peace that the sound brought him, akin to the sound of gentle rain dew, droplet by droplet, it took his anguish, his fear and his pain far far away.
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When Ares woke up, it was already past mid-day. The sun was shining through the window curtains, giving the room a soft glow and he was still in the same position he fell asleep the night before, “a blanket burrito” in Eve’s words, but this time he wore a soft smile. He’d never felt like this after a rest, he was revitalized and full of energy, with a dull ache in the back of his mind from the absolute beating he’d taken, but besides that, he felt happy to be alive. He decided not to move for a couple of minutes in order to contemplate what he had dreamed of “so this is what dreaming is like…I see why users love to write about so much” he mussed, before being pulled out of that train of thought by a soft knocking on the bedroom’s door.
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A voice spoke from the other side “Hi? Ares, are you awake?” It was Eve, her soft voice had a tint of worry in it “It is past mid-day already, I ordered some food so we can eat together, o-only if you want to, of course, it is okay if you don’t, just let me know okay?. That’s it, I’ll be in the living room” He could hear Eve's footsteps as she left the hall, and felt his smile grow bigger, blushing a little too “how wonderful it is to be living a dream” was his conclusion, before fixing up the bed and leaving the room to have lunch with his beloved best friend.