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The travel to the Vees tower was too easy. Lucifer arrived before the lights of the stage were turned on and stayed out of sight just to think if he should just go and interrupt everything right now or wait a little bit until the dumb TV man entered the stage.
His daughter's girlfriend told him that scaring Vox could work, and that was a brilliant idea, but he also wanted Vox to be humiliated for all the things he made Charlie go through.
Sighing, he chose to wait a little, just until the sinners were paying attention to that overlord so he could show them who was the real boss in Hell.
Oh, and after making Vox fear for his life—or death— he would go to take Alastor with him, so he'll be able to annoy that deer a lot more. Because, if Lucifer was honest with himself, the disappearance of Alastor was funny just for a couple of hours, but the hotel was pretty boring without him to argue with. Also, his daughter would be happy if he fixed two situations in just one shot. Good parenting.
"Okay, I just hope that the show starts soon. I wanted to see my novel." Lucifer said while playing with his cane and tail. He really didn't want to fuck this opportunity up.
He could hear the noise from the stage and a lot of sinners screaming when the overlord entered to start his stupid discourse. The king didn't want to listen to his words and was starting to dissociate when something caught his attention, or more exactly, someone.
"What? Is that—" He stopped flying just to stand on the ground, just in front of the shadow that appeared and waved to him. "Alastor? Oh fuck, I was planning to help you after all this."
The shadow looked at him angrily before smiling again. It seemed that it wanted to be followed by the fallen angel. Lucifer wanted to refuse, but, thinking about it, it could be a better use of his time if he frees Alastor and then goes to intimidate Vox and mock him for losing his prisoner.
"Well, you win, shadow Bambi. I'll go with you." The king said while entering the building with the help of the entity. The backstage was huge, and he felt lucky that nobody was paying attention to that part of the building; all the Vees workers were in front, trying to do their best to not get punished after the presentation.
Lucifer walked in silence, only going faster when the shadow looked upset again. A quick idea of annoying the captive deer crossed his mind, but all that disappeared when he finally saw him again. Alastor was tied up to a chair, dark circles under his eyes demonstrate how tired he actually was. But of course, the smile was there like always, even if he looked wrecked.
"Sooooo, mind telling me what you were even thinking when you decided to sell yourself to Vox and the others?" He smiled, trying to make the ambience a little bit less tense; he snapped his fingers, and another chair appeared for him to sit down. "I actually missed arguing with you; the hotel feels boring without you always speaking and making fun of the others."
"Good evening to you too, sire. You might be the king of hell, but don't forget your manners." Of course! Of course Alastor would annoy him even if he was stressed. "I'm feeling quite surprised; I didn't expect my shadow to find you around here. Are you trying to spy on the Vees?"
With a new snap of fingers from the devil, Alastor was free from the rope. The red demon stroked his wrists and crossed his legs, letting himself be more comfortable than before at the same time that a pair of black tentacles appeared behind him and destroyed the cameras in the room. Lucifer had the dignity to make two cups of coffee appear for them. The deer really was exhausted if he just accepted the drink without a second thought. Did that stupid television give him enough food? The king would humiliate him even more. Fuck the TV, he never trusted that media.
"Nope, not spying. I'm here to kick that overlord in the fucking butt, because he has mistreated Charlie and the hotel more than enough. I won't let that go so easily." Seeing the demon still tired, another snap of the king's fingers made new coffee appear in the cup; the action made Alastor move one of his ears in surprise and smile a little more genuinely than the average. "Also, I came to rescue you, so you go do your job and stop being ridiculed by them. I am the only one who deserves that pleasure."
The last part earned a little laugh from the cannibal, and Lucifer would be lying if he said that he didn't find it kinda cute. It was not the sarcastic laughter that he had heard so many times before, it felt real and relaxed.
Both of them stayed in silence for a while, listening to Vox talk as if he were the center of the universe. The coffee disappeared into the two cups, and the devil made the objects go away.
"So, Bambi. I think you should go to the hotel to rest a little bit. I can take care of this situation here." Lucifer stood up, watching the sinner follow his lead. "Just go to the exit door and use your shadow travel; I'll go back soon."
"Not so quickly, sir. If you go right now, you'll be the one who gets humiliated by him." Alastor warned, his eyes bright and the wicked smile widening at the sight of the anger of the devil. But he didn't let the king talk before explaining himself. "A little bird told Vox your secret. And actually it makes sense for me that you are always mad at me but don't hurt me with all your powers. You told Vaggie that you can't smite or hurt any sinner, and Vox is waiting to make you look like a fool."
The revelation hit harder than what Lucifer actually expected. His face showed his feelings of betrayal. Did Vagatha —or Vaggie? Or was it Veegie?— betrayed his trust? Betrayed the hotel and Charlie? How could she—!?
"Don't be ridiculous, Lu. She didn't tell Vox what you said to her. My dear shadow discovered that Vox was using Angel Dust against his knowledge; he was being mind-controlled and informing about all our activities. That's something we have to fix too. I don't like Angel's work, but he's part of the Hotel and does not deserve that kind of treatment." The deer explained while stretching his limbs and taking his cane with the help of his loyal shadow. "So, knowing you won't be able to hit or intimidate him, what are you planning to do to make them pay?"
The king was one step closer to starting to hyperventilate. Did Vox told anyone else he can't hurt any sinner!? How could he have been so silly to tell that secret? No one knew about it, no one except for Lilith. He was doomed now. He was so fucked up that the panic started to invade him, at least until the deer put one hand in his hat to get his attention.
"I see you are lost, sir. But I have an idea you can't let pass." His eyes were bright and his smile wide again. "You help me to break some old contracts, and I'll be your servant in exchange for you healing me, making me recover my powers, and fixing my staff."
Lucifer took a step back, looking to the sinner with distrust in his eyes. He knew Alastor was a megalomaniac, and doing a deal with him would be dangerous to him. The deer was unpredictable; he could try to attack him back or hurt the people of the hotel.
The extended sinner's hand was still waiting, and Lucifer looked at his eyes.
----
"Trust us to handle the angel menace!" Exclaimed Vox. Looking like he was totally enjoying himself and all the attention the sinners give him.
Of course that didn't last long; not even a second after, thunder resonated in the air with great strength, and all the people looked up just to observe Lucifer in all of his demonic—and a little bit angelic, if you could say it like that— glory. He seemed really mad, but with a smile that displayed confidence.
"Hey loser!" Lucifer descended a little bit, seeing the drones capturing his image and transmitting it to the screens. "I think you should stop being so stubborn to think that you can defeat Heaven. You don't care about all the lives that a war can take; you are not even working well with your team, and you want to lead all the sinners? Your pride is almost as big as mine."
The sinners started talking, part of them scared of the king of Hell, others amused, and some even annoyed at his presence. Lucifer couldn't help but think how bad he was as a king if his people didn't respect him. Yes, that was another thing he had to fix. But first, the Hotel problems.
"Oh! So you decided to stop hiding in your daughter's Hotel to see us? To stop us from trying to save ourselves?" Vox grinned, using his wires to be at the same level as the flying king. "You never cared about us, sinners. You just want to silence me for actually doing something."
Looking him face-to-face, Lucifer cursed the punishment he had; he really wanted to punch that motherfucker in the face.
"You are a pathetic excuse for a king; no one loves you, and you are not needed here. So do us all a favor and just get lost." Vox's voice was cold as ice, and Lucifer knew deep down that he wouldn't be able to forget those words as fast as he wanted. Fire escaped from the fallen angel, his hands turning into fists that hurt for the want to punch him and break that stupid screen. That reaction was seen by Vox and made him smile. Oh, that son of a bitch. "Are you mad, Lu? What? Will you try to kill me? Go on! Do it!"
With just those words, the King understood what the overlord was trying to do; he wanted to show all the people present that he can't hurt a single sinner. Just like Alastor said he would.
Vox knew that Lucifer couldn't hurt him, couldn't hurt anyone in there. And all the act, all the power, and the appearance were just for show. He was already smelling the victory when Lucifer laughed so hard that some tears of joy escaped from his eyes.
"Oh, you were thinking I was going to fight you? Damn, you are crazier than what I thought, TV." He keeps flying, circling the sinner and looking at him with entertainment. "I won't get my hands dirty with your disgusting blood, but I have a friend who really wants some revenge on you."
And the shitty smile of Vox disappeared confusion appearing in his features.
The radio screech that followed was so strong that all the sinners and the Vees hid their faces, trying to escape it.
"WHAT THE HELL—" The TV felt a mix of fear and anger invade him.
Nobody could have prepared him for what he saw next; Alastor was using his kaiju form, destroying from the inside the building where he was left alone. The fur of his chest showed a golden scar, and the usual sewing marks were turning gold instead of green. His staff grew with him, the center of it now showing a line of pure gold where it used to be broken —fortunate for him, no one was close enough to see the little duck drawings that Lucifer made appear—.
Oh, Vox was so fucked.
"ALASTOR, GO BACK TO YOUR CHAIR!" Vox was the one panicking now. He couldn't feel the contract that tied the deer to him, it wasn't there. How didn't he notice it?! He had been really immersed in his talk to convince the sinners to help him. "You cannot do this; you belong to me!"
The King of Hell flew higher until he was next to the face of the red demon. Both of them smiled with complicity, and the speakers of the Vees scenery let Alastor's voice be heard for all the sinners.
"Now now, Vox. I have a better deal with someone better than you." The black tentacles were moving behind him, keeping the building from falling on the people. "Our offer expired."
The media overlord felt his chest hurt with those words.
"You say you work in a team, Vox. But this time I've been watching you, Velvette and Valentino. I realized you are using them as tools. The same that you want to do with all the other sinners that follow your plans." Alastor tilted his head a little bit, his smile wide, and he crouched slightly, making the sinners try to go back. Lucifer chose to sit on his shoulder, smiling with superiority while his wings were showing all of his damned glory; that seemed to amuse the deer more. "And you have the courage to call Lucifer a bad leader? You don't care about the sinners winning, you are the one who wants to win no matter what, no matter who dies there."
"Soooo, my people, if you want to leave, this is the moment; you don't have to die in the mouth of my deer." The King could lie and say that this was not entertaining. But he and Alastor knew better than that.
The sinners begin running away as fast as they were able. The faces of Alastor and the fallen angel turned to see the Vees on the stage.
"Well, dear deer. You must be starving, so enjoy it." Said Lucifer, enjoying the pure fear in the faces of those who had wronged his daughter.
"That will be a pleasure, sir."
----
When the pseudo-battle —better called carnage— was over, Alastor reverted to his normal form. He seemed to be pleased with the meal he just had, and Lucifer hoped that those overlords take time to regenerate. The Hotel could do good with peace for now.
"Why did you let Velen escape?" Asked the angel, sitting on the floor of the destroyed stage, next to where the deer chose to lie down. "I was hoping you would eat the three of them."
"I let Velvette go because she didn't annoy me as much as Valentino and Vox. I don't usually eat women even if they are evil like her." Alastor turned a little just to see him, still pleased with himself. "I suppose I have to say thanks for the assistance you just gave me. But since I'm now your servant, I'll take it like you just invested in me so I can keep the Hotel safe, just as we agreed."
Lucifer took a moment to actually look at him, the Radio Demon seemed more relaxed than he had ever seen him before. His smile was real; the pain and tiredness of the wound were gone. He looked cute like that.
"If I knew that your blood would help me this much and taste so amazing, I probably would have asked you to help me before." Alastor saw the gold in the cheeks of the King and laughed. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone about the sounds you made when I bit your neck. This is between us."
They stayed on the floor for a while, both of them thinking of different things that were better unsaid, at least for now.
"So, since I have your soul now. Vox, and the other owner you told me about, will be mad." Lucifer said, while playing with a little duck he made appear, it had ears similar to the ones Alastor had. "But I think it's better this way. I'll keep you strong, and you will take care of everyone in the Hazbin Hotel, plus you cannot hurt me or you will lose all of what I have gifted you."
Alastor chose to sit, looking at his cane and all the drawings that Lucifer put on there. Then, he looked at the king again, still smiling with unusual kindness. "Yes, that's what we agreed on. But don't forget that we will still fight; you admitted it's funny for both of us."
"Yes, it is. So now you are the Morningstar's Executioner, another title for you, Radio Demon." The fallen angel stood up and offered his hand, a little surprised that the other demon actually accepted. That made him feel warm, but he wouldn't talk about it now.
"And I'll do the best work you could ever dream. You'll see, duck king."
With those words, they both knew it was time to go home, together.