Chapter Text
“Ben poco ama colui che ancora può esprimere, a parole, quanto ami”
(Very little loves the man that can still express, with words, how much he loves)
Dante Alighieri
The chaos at lunch hour is something that will forever baffle Erwin.
Chaos in general is something that Erwin has difficulties accepting, but he does. He has to, at least while he still frequents school. And Hange.
He really doesn’t recall meeting them for the first time. Hange has just been a part of his life forever, like Mike and Nile.
They’ve been friends since they were toddlers and lived near each other. Meeting up at the park nearly every day, at Erwin’s house every friday night, hanging out and sitting togheter at lunch. Like now.
“I’m telling you, the biggest boobies I’ve ever seen -and I’ve seen quite a few trust me- and she just keeps bending over to pick up things that somehow fall always near me…”
Nile was gesturing wildly, with an almost feral glint in his eyes, while Mike was trying to protect his sandwich from being flung across the lunch room.
Hange was munching happily on their own lunch, engrossed in their mashed potatoes and mindless of Nile’s entusiasm. Contrary of Erwin, who was trying to make his friend see reason.
“I’m pretty sure the History teacher is not interested in you, judging by the fact she’s engaged…” and that she really tends to drop everything.
“By the way” interjected Hange, who apparently wasn’t so engrossed in the food after all “Weren’t you trying to get into the pants of that blonde guy, Alvin?”
“Armin?” corrected Nile, snorting. “Nah. He’s got that damned hot-headed watchdog breathing down his neck. I really don’t want to get suspended for beating a freshman. And that girl with the scarf gives me the creeps.”
Mike gave a little smirk and Hange downright hollered. “Nile Dok is scared of a freshman!”
Nile swatted them on the head, hissing. “No, what the fuck are you shouting about, you shithead! I’m just thinking about my future career.”
Erwin hummed, with a smile of his own. Nile looked at him and snorted again.
“What do you have to be so smug about, Smith? I’m pretty sure you’ve never ever sticked your little friend up som-”
“I’m eating” said Mike placidly.
Nile huffed.
“I mean, come on. You don’t think I can be the hot lover that manages to sway the hot chick away from the rich dumb guy?”
“No” said Mike, finishing his sandwich.
“And if you really want to think about your future career, you should start studying for that math test instead of trying to seduce a teacher into an illegal relationship” said Erwin.
Nile looked at him strangely.
“First, that chick looks way too young and hot to be teaching and second, you don’t know what it means to feel compelled to just go and bend someone over, fuck the system and all that illegal shit.”
He smirked. “I’m starting to wonder if you’re asexual, Erwin. Really, I’ve practically never seen you look even the least bit infatuated or worked up, or set on something else that isn’t studying”.
Erwin shrugged. “I have priorities”.
Nile laughed. “Sure. I don’t think you even know how to ask someone out, let alone how to get laid.”
Erwin felt some primal need to defend his honor.
“I’ll have you know, I did date once. Even kissed her.”
Nile waved a hand. “Holding hands in elementary school and a peck on the cheek don’t count, Smith. No, I’m considering the serious stuff here.”
The blonde shrugged again. “I could date anyone, it’s just that nobody has caught my eye yet. And like I said, I have priorities.”
Nile looked horrified. “Dude, you’re a senior. You can’t just get out of here a virgin. Hell, even that Haddock nerd managed to get himself laid.”
“True” said Hange. “You have to consider other priorities that are as much priorities as the priorities you think are prior.”
Erwin scoffed. “And what right have you to -wait no, I don’t want to know” he cut them off before they could reply.
“Anyway” resumed Nile “The only reason I see for this reluctance is inability.”
“I told you-”
“Let’s make a bet”
Erwin was taken aback. “What?”
Nile smiled, a dangerous smile. “You said you could date anyone. I bet you couldn’t get Punkie to go out with you.”
“I could very well…” then Erwin registered. “…Wait, Ackerman…?”
Nile hummed. “I bet you won’t be able to get him to kiss you on his own before the end of the semester.”
“I’m on it.”
Erwin, in his worry, managed to stay stable in the flow of students on the corridor.
He was really starting to doubt his sanity. What on Earth?
Levi Ackerman, the almost-punk.
He was short, grumpy, friendless and wore eyeliner. He had a liking for tight dark pants and ACDC shirts. And he possessed a glare that intimidated even the Headmaster.
He wasn’t hard to spot, but Erwin was rooted in place.
Slowly, the flow diminished and soon, they were the only ones left in the corridor.
Levi kept rummaging throught his locker, soft sounds that didn’t disturb the quietness.
Until he slammed it shut and fixed Erwin with two cold, steely eyes that sent shivers down the tall young man.
“The fuck do you want?”
Oh. The foul mouth too. And the paleness.
“Oi, eyebrows. You got something to ask? You look constipated.”
Erwin realized the other boy had been calling to him for quite some time, but he really didn’t know what to say. He, role model student, excellent football player, with a knack for elegant speech and jackets.
How am I supposed to date this guy if I can’t even ask him out?…
Then he realized he had just proved Nile right, and thank God Nile wasn’t there.
No, Erwin steered himself. Now he’d go over, present himself and ask Levi if maybe he wanted to go grab coffee someti-
“Are you fucking serious?”
Except Levi had come over first and was practically looking him down with an air of pure disgust, even if he was shorter than him by a good head and a half.
Erwin gulped. “Hello.”
Levi arched an eyebrow.
“I’m Erwin Smith.”
“I know who you are.”
Right. “I was just wondering if… if…”
“Out with it, Erwin Smith. I’m already late for class.”
“Wanna date?”
What? Where had all his elegant speech gone?
Levi looked just as baffled as he felt, but he managed to regain his composture in seconds, the usual deadpan expression back in place.
“Right” he said flatly, hooking his bag higher on his shoulder and turning away “go fuck with someone else.”
Uh? I just wanted to grab coffee, not-
Erwin smacked himself (in his mind. His limbs were still uncooperative.) and helplessy watched the short figure saunter away.
The blonde noticed the slightest swaying of hips. Although…
Well damn, Smith.