Chapter Text
Alex woke with a start, still able to feel the phantom hands on his body. As he always did when he had those dreams, he got out of bed and headed straight for the shower, stopping long enough to check on his two year old daughter, making sure she was still asleep. It had been a little over three years since the night that had changed his life forever. He has no memory of the night itself, something he is unsure if he is thankful for.
He remembers the following morning though. He remembers waking up to pain in an area he’d never felt it in before, and as he stood gingerly, feeling something cold and wet seep out of him and down his leg. When he’d gotten to a seedy hotel bathroom he’d seen the hickeys on his neck, chest, and thighs, as well as multiple hand shaped bruises on his hips and thighs. He was a smart guy, and knew what all that most likely meant, but hadn’t wanted to admit that something like that could be true. He didn’t want to admit that something like that could happen to him.
As gently as he could he had put clothes on, before calling an Uber, surprised his wallet and money were still in his pants pocket. He was dropped off at a nearby hospital where he went through the painstaking process of getting a rape kit, and talking to the police. He didn’t want to pursue an investigation just then, but also knew it would be important to have the evidence preserved properly should he decide to. He agreed to the investigation six weeks later when a doctor told him he was pregnant. He knew that if this person wasn’t caught and charged they could come after him for custody of the child, effectively forcing their way into his life for the next 18 years.
He hadn’t even known he was a carrier until that moment, his parents never seeing the need to get him tested for it as he had never expressed an interest in men. Carriers were not looked kindly on, many people believing them to be slaves to their baser instincts, so if you weren’t gay or bisexual you didn’t get tested for fear someone would find out.
Telling his parents he was pregnant was one of the hardest things he’d ever done. He ended up having to sit through both of them telling him how disappointed they were in him, how they had stressed the importance of protection only for him not to listen. He knew, logically at least, that all he had to do was tell them he’d been raped, and they would have supported him, but that would mean admitting it to himself, and that was just something he couldn’t bring himself to do.
At the time he planned to put the baby up for adoption, unable to stomach the thought of raising that man’s child. However his plans for adoption started changing the first time he felt the baby move. The first time he felt it kick he knew he would never be able to give it up.
His parents had both reacted differently when he told them he wanted to keep the baby. His dad hadn’t been surprised, having noticed subtle changes in his body language, and told him he would support him no matter what. His mother on the other hand had been furious, telling him he was ruining his life, that he was too young to be a father. She told him that if he planned to keep the baby she would not be helping to raise it.
Fortunately, she had already been elected by this point, they were able to avoid the scandal of a pregnant 18 year old son during the campaign. Unfortunately, they weren’t able to keep the pregnancy hidden forever, and in February of her first year in office one of his classmates sold photos of him, clearly pregnant, to one of the tabloid.
This had led to his mother having to increase his security after being mobbed by paparazzi multiple times on campus. He was never so thankful for them as when his male classmates started cornering him after the baby was born, trying to get him into bed. It hadn’t taken Cash or Amy long to figure out what had happened to him after seeing his reactions to being cornered by these men. The two of them becoming even more protective of him when he confirmed it.
“Hey Darlin, what are you doing up?” His mom asked as he walked into the kitchen, freshly showered. Things were much better between them now. It helped that she absolutely adored her granddaughter causing her to change her tune on his decision to keep her.
”Couldn’t sleep.” He answered as he got a glass of water, taking a seat next to her at the table.
“Nervous for this weekend?” She asked, assuming it had to do with her sending him to the Royal Wedding in London, and he was happy to let her continue to believe that as the truth would mean admitting he’d been lying to her for years.
“A little, it’s been a while since I’ve attended something like this.” He admitted. Since his daughter had been born he had stepped away from most of his public appearances, not wanting to raise her in the public’s eyes. He also hoped that if he was out of the public eye maybe the attention being a carrier brought him would die down, that people would just forget about that part of him.
”I really appreciate you agreeing to do this for me Sugar, is Rosa going to keep Lucy for you?” Rosa was the nanny his mom and Leo hired for him so that he could focus on his studies when he needed to, knowing that his daughter was well taken care of.
”Actually Rosa had already asked for the weekend off, so dad’s going to watch her for me. I think he promised her a day spent at the pool there.” His dad had expressed regrets for walking out on them and now was hell bent on making it up to him through his daughter.
“It is good that you’ll be able to relax and take the night off, though try not to go too wild.” She said with a smile.
”I’ll still have a jet lagged toddler to deal with in the morning, I’d rather not do that hungover.” He said with a laugh, getting a bright smile out of her.
”Speaking of said toddler, you should get to bed and try to get at least a couple of hours of sleep before you have to board the plane.”
”You know, you could at least try to look like you’re having fun.” June said as she threw herself down in the chair next to his. “It’s not every day you get a night off of Papi duty.” She grinned, bumping her shoulder to his.
”Oh trust me, that is a duty that never ends. I’m currently wondering if Dad got her down easy. If he fed her all sugar. Is she going to sleep through the night or will I be in for a sleepless night myself.” He grinned when she rolled her eyes.
”You know, you became a lot less fun when you became a dad.” She groaned, laughing when Nora plopped down in her lap.
”No one warned us that being a good dad makes for a boring friend.” Nora agreed with a nod.
”Well, sorry to be such a disappointment.” He tried to joke, but he was unable to keep the self deprecation out of his voice.
”Sorry little bit, we didn’t mean it to sound like that, we just thought you could do with a little loosening up. I mean, when was the last time you were even drunk?” June asked, giving him a teasing smile.
”The night I got pregnant.” He said more to himself than them. He wasn’t even sure they heard it, but when June reached out and gave his hand a squeeze he knew they had.
”Maybe it’s time you forgave yourself for that. You made a mistake, and gave our family its biggest little blessing.” It was hard listening to his family talk about how he had “made a mistake”, when he really hadn’t. The process of conceiving his daughter was done to him, without his consent. Like with his parents, he knew June would be nothing but supportive. In fact she would likely never let him out of her sight again, blame herself for what was done to him. Also just like with their parents, any time he thought about telling her, he would have a panic attack, and couldn’t get the words out. In the end, he just gave up even trying to tell her just like he had with them. He came to terms that this was something he’d take to his grave a long time ago.
The girls rolled their eyes when he reached for his phone, feeling it vibrate in his pocket.
Pa
Little one is down for the night, Abuelo really knows how to tucker em out 😴
Alex
Thanks again for watching her, I plan on leaving soon.
“Alright, I’m going to have one more drink, do some last minute mingling, and finally go back to the hotel for some sleep before I have to be up in a few hours to wrangle a hyper toddler.” He says with a smile as he stands, the girls grinning and accompanying him to the bar, as he knew they would.
Ever since June had found him at a party she had begged him to go to being accosted by one of the other drunk party guests she hadn’t let him walk alone at any party with alcohol. Once upon a time he would have been ridiculously annoyed by it, but now he found it comforting. Like no one could get to him without having to go through her. He knew she also appreciated that he bought her drinks when she went to the bar with him.
”So are you three enjoying the party?” He turned when he heard the person next to him speak, and about forgot to breath when he came face to face with Arthur Fox.
”Um, why, don’t we look like we are?” He asked, stumbling over his words, out of practice socializing at these more so political events.
“About as much as you’d enjoy a root canal.” Arthur said with a laugh.
“No, this is definitely better than a root canal.” Alex said with a grin, “Now had you said a sleepless night with a sick child I might have had to agree.”
”Well, that depends, can said child keep anything down?” Arthur laughed out right at that.
”Absolutely not!” Alex was unable to stop himself from laughing.
”Yes, well some of us wouldn’t know about that.” Came the posh voice of Prince Henry on the other side of his father.
”Trust me, it is definitely more lively than this.” Arthur said with a grin. “I call dibs on planning yours and Bea’s weddings.”
“Not happening Darling, the realm would never recover from the embarrassment of having so many dignitaries so deeply in their cups.” A tinkling laugh came from behind them, and Alex couldn’t hide his blush at realizing Princess Catherine had likely heard his talk of sick children.
“Oh, come on, we have four young people here, all painfully sober, if that isn’t an indictment on our lack of party throwing skills I don’t know what is.” Arthur laughed.
”It could also be an endorsement of them when the young people don’t have to be drunk to have a good time.” Catherine argued back, though her smile spoke volumes.
“I don’t know mum, the fact that Mr Claremont-Diaz has a drink in his hand when he’s never photographed with one could be telling.” Prince Henry’s comment had heat flooding Alex’s face, and the look on said Prince’s face when he noticed had him wishing he could hide somewhere, preferably with Amy and Cash guarding the door.
The Prince had been outed earlier that year by one of the boy’s he’d slept with while he’d been attending Eton. Apparently said boy had been outed himself and brought down as many people as he could with him. Alex had thought the Palace would play it off as a boy experimenting in his teens, but Catherine and Arthur had come out in support of their son before the palace had a chance to do anything, allowing the Prince to stay out of the closet.
”Yes, well, hangovers and toddlers don’t really mix.” Alex tried to laugh his reaction off, thankfully taking the glass from the bartender and taking a sip. “And apparently my sister wants to make sure one of us leaves drunk tonight.” He said, looking at how full the drink was.
”Oh, no, that was bought from…” The bartender looked to the other end of the bar, “Oh, I guess they left.” The man shrugged going to serve the next patron.
“Well little bit, now if you don’t finish it you’re not wasting your own money.” June grinned, elbowing Alex playfully as she spoke.
“Whoa, Alex, are you alright?” Henry asked when the young man stumbled into him twenty minutes or so later.
“Something doesn’t feel right.” Alex mumble, and Henry took the still almost full glass from the man’s hands, placing it on the cake table.
“I’ll go find his security detail.” The friend Henry had been speaking with said, while Henry helped keep Alex upright.
”Right, I believe that is them over along the back wall.” He was pretty sure he was right when the man and woman started making their way quickly, but calmly to them.
“Here your highness, why don’t you let us take Mr Claremont-Diaz somewhere to sleep it off.” Came the voice of one of Philip’s friends, and Henry could feel Alex start to tremble under his hold.
”That’s quite alright. Alex’s security should be here any second, I’m sure they can handle him.” He spoke up, feeling Alex start to sag in his arms.
”Nonsense, I’m sure they are required here to watch Ms Claremont-Diaz and Ms Holleran.” The other one with him said, reaching out for Alex.
Henry tried to take a step back, but his feet got tangled with Alex’s, bringing them both tumbling to the ground. Henry tried to grab ahold of the table to steady himself, but all it did was disrupt the center balance of the ginormous cake. He fell to the ground Alex next to him, but rolled Alex under him when he saw the cake coming down on top of them.
"No, please get off me. Please, I don't want this. Please don't do this." He could feel Alex weakly pushing against his chest, his arms feeling uncoordinated.
"Shhh you're safe Darling, no one is going to hurt you ever again." He whispered as he looked into Alex's panicked eyes, grateful Alex's voice was quiet enough no else could hear. He had seen this reaction before in some of the teens he'd encountered visiting the shelters his friend Percy ran, and knew what it likely meant.
"I've got you, you're safe." He kept whispering as he rolled them so they were on their sides facing each other, thankful when Alex started to calm down and his mumblings stopped. However his heart about stopped when he realized it was because Alex was unconscious.