Archive of Our Own

“Merry Christmas,” The liquor store clerk says to Nanami as he collects his purchase from the counter and turns to leave. He nods and politely repeats it, heading out into the brisk winter air.

He really wasn't planning on spending Christmas like this, he would've been perfectly content staying home and getting to one of the books he's been putting off. Or cooking a new meal and watching a foreign film. Something relaxing, something easy. Instead he’s walking to Ieiri’s house for the Christmas party she hosts every year.

He exhales, his eyes tracing the gray wisps of clouds in the sky and the squared off tops of buildings.

Soon enough, he’s at Ieiri’s doorstep, and he almost considers turning around and heading home. But he’s too slow, the door opens before he can turn away, or knock for that matter, and it isn't Ieiri who answers. It’s Satoru Gojo, dressed as Santa Claus—minus a faux beard.

Nanami groans internally but his expression must've given away his displeasurement because Gojo annoyingly says, “Hey, I didn't even say anything yet.”

“Yet.” Nanami pointedly replies, “Are you going to let me inside or just stand in my way all night?”

Gojo frowns but steps aside, allowing Nanami to step inside. He removes his shoes carefully, shaking off a cold chill as he adjusts to the warm interior of the home. He sheds his jacket as well, hanging it alongside what he can only assume is Gojo's jacket.

He hardly gets a few steps further before he's bombarded by Gojo again.

“Kentooo.” The white-haired man whines obnoxiously, grabbing his tie, “It's Christmas, couldn't you at least wear a festive sweater or something? Why do you insist on always dressing so stuffy?”

Nanami’s eye twitches slightly, “This is festive. I only wear this tie during the holidays.” He tells him, referring to the same one still bunched between the white haired man’s fingers. In all truth, he thinks it’s a little corny—a dark green tie with Christmas string lights criss-crossing in a consistent pattern—but it was a gift from Haibara so he wears it when the chance arises.

Gojo releases his grasp and sighs, “I guess I’ll just have to get you a proper Christmas sweater next year. Missed my chance this time.”

“Don't you dare. I won't wear it, it’ll be a complete waste of money.” He warns.

“That's not true, I know you have a soft spot for gifts from your friends.”

“You're not my friend.”

“You're here with me right now, so that must count for something!”

“I’m here because Ieiri invited me.”

Gojo slumps, temporarily accepting defeat, “Fine, be that like.” He says, pouting like a child who didn't get his way. Which, in a sense, is a perfect way to describe Satoru Gojo; though for him, he often always gets what he wants.

“I’m not going to console you.” Nanami says, “Now, where are the others?”

“Kitchen.” He mumbles with a huff.

Nanami just shakes his head at the display and walks past him towards the kitchen.

He’s visited Ieiri’s home in the past for parties not unlike this one, so he makes his way to the enclosed kitchen without issue. Inside he finds the hostess and Iori chatting quietly, cradling wine glasses in their hands. He feels a slight pull to leave them be, so as to not disturb their conversation, but Ieiri catches sight of him before he can get away.

“Nanami!” She calls to him, waving him over, “So glad you made it.”

He enters the room fully and walks over, “Thank you for inviting me,” He says amiably, revealing the bottle of wine he’d brought and offering it to her, “I didn't want to come empty handed.”

She accepts it happily, “We already went shopping for booze but you can never have too much!”

“I’d like to disagree with that.” Iori cuts in.

Just as Nanami is about to agree, the kitchen door swings open and Gojo glides inside, saying, “Hope you guys didn't forget about me. I’ve been out there all on my own, even after Nanami tore my heart out!”

“What the hell are you talking about, Gojo?” Iori asks, directing an irritated look his way.

“He—” Gojo doesn't get to explain. The sound of a new voice, out in the living room, catches everyone's attention.

“Hey! We're here! Anyone around?” Mm, Nanami knows that voice, that’s Haibara.

He’s the first to leave the kitchen, and the first to see it's not just him standing out there. He's with Geto. Which… is fine. That's fine.

It's completely, perfectly, utterly fine; but it still freezes him in place for half a second, it elicits a twinge of discomfort in his chest. Because why would they show up together? In fact, why didn't Geto and Gojo come together?

He doesn't have the time to think about it, Haibara has his hands full and it feels like Nanami’s duty to help him. Nanami practically rushes to him and takes everything from his hands, completely missing the bashful grin that appears on his face.

“Nanami, you don't—” Haibara tries, but he’s already gone, off to the kitchen before the sentence is finished. So, he follows him.

“Y’know, I’m much stronger than I look.” Haibara says, for Nanami’s ears only, as he leans against the kitchen counter.

That prompts the blonde to face him, eyebrows drawn together, “Did I somehow imply that you weren't strong?”

Haibara smiles, tilting his head, “I could've handled a couple bags, they're not even heavy.”

“You can handle so much. But I like helping you.” Nanami says, and immediately he realizes it sounds like a confession. The eye contact, the conviction in his tone; maybe he was coming on too strong. His lungs feel tight behind his ribs.

A faint blush creeps up Haibara's’s cheeks, his gaze breaks away, “I… like when you help me, too.”

Nanami decides to take that at face value, he will gain absolutely nothing by reading between the lines. That's how miscommunications and misunderstandings happen. That's how it turns out one party wanted one thing and the other another, so he sticks to face value. If he leaves it to that, there will never be any confusion.

“What’d you bring, Haibara?” Now it’s Gojo’s voice speaking, butting into the little space they’ve carved out for themselves in the kitchen.

Haibara, naturally, warms right up to the change in conversation. Always eager to talk to his colleagues, as though he doesn't see them all the time.

“Oh, just some pastries from the bakery by my apartment. I asked for a variety because I wasn't really sure what to pick. I think they’re mainly sweets, though.” The brunette explains happily.

“Now we're talkin’!” Gojo interjects, sparing no time before shamelessly rifling through the two paper bags Haibara brought, now making themselves at home on the countertop.

Nanami exhales incredulously, put off by the scene. He excuses himself, venturing away to find a drink. Luckily, it was very easy, as Ieiri had said, they had stocked up. And she seriously wasn't joking, her liquor cabinet is stacked to the brim, like she'd planned for them all to get completely blackout.

Nanami would be keeping his dignity in tack tonight, if he has any say in the matter.

So, he pours himself a modest glass of the wine he brought; it's mild-tasting, one that's not too sweet nor too bitter that almost anyone can enjoy. He takes a sip and sighs, scanning the room. The kitchen has become a little crowded, but before he can make his escape someone catches him by the elbow. He's just about to commit a heinous crime towards whoever it is, but as he turns, he meets Haibara’s cheerful gaze.

“Nanami, where are you going? Geto brought KFC so you should get some food first.”

Nanami sighs, he's really not that hungry but he figures he should at least eat a bit. He makes a small portion for himself and soon enough they're all gathered around the kotatsu. There's not much room, but they make it work.

There's conversations happening within conversations, then one will pause so everyone can listen to a story someone has to tell. Iori goes on a ramble about her students at the Kyoto school, boasting about how talented they are. Naturally, Gojo takes that as a direct attack and starts to go off about his wonderful students.

Nanami’s eyes shift around between his friends, and they land on Geto, who's watching Gojo prattle on endlessly like he’s the center of the universe. Probably because to him, he is. Nanami thinks, I know the feeling. But he can't help but feel bitter, it just isn't fair that he gets to look at Gojo with such adoring gazes so openly, even at times like this when he's being undeniably irritating.

His eyes wander back to Haibara, as they always seem to do, and he's listening intently, face propped in his hands and his lips curved into a small smile. Haibara always seems to be smiling; he's like the sun, constantly lighting the way.

“And that's why I’ll never go there again!” Gojo finishes whatever it was he was going on about—clearly he had switched topics halfway through and Nanami was too caught up in his thoughts to notice.

“Fascinating.” Iori replies, rolling her eyes.

“It is! That's why I brought it up.” Gojo says defensively.

“Ugh, I was being sarcastic!”

Ieiri cuts in, wrapping an arm around Iori, “Utahime, let's not argue on Christmas, m’kay?”

Iori softens, “Yeah, yeah.”

Gojo looks like he’s about to make a snarky comment about how easily Ieiri can rein in her girlfriend but Geto flashes him a warning look and he changes his mind—so clearly he’s no better. Nanami observes the scene and quietly contemplates his own relationship with Haibara. He's glad to have him in his life, but he craves more. If it's what Haibara wants, he’ll stay by his side as his friend for as long as he can. As long as he’ll let him. But deep down, Nanami knows he’ll always want more.

Until they can walk beside each other as partners, as lovers, he won't know true happiness.

“Hey, everyone, look, I just got a picture from Megumi! And he said Merry Christmas, too!” Gojo suddenly exclaims, pointing excitedly at his phone screen. He stretches out his arm, putting the screen on display for the group. On it was a photo of Fushiguro, Itadori, and Kugisaki squeezed into the frame with a towering Christmas tree in the background.

A photo obviously taken by Itadori, with him in the middle of his friends, grinning wide as ever. Kugisaki wears a genuine smile, and Fushiguro, as aloof as he can appear, still has it in him to put on a little smile for his friend's photo.

A small, warm feeling tugs in Nanami’s chest. Something a little parental, likely one of the only things he and Gojo can relate on.

Gojo’s phone buzzes again. He brings it back to his view and sighs, reading the message aloud, “‘This is Yuuji, stole Fushiguro’s phone to send you that.’”

Nanami grins, that makes perfect sense.

“I was really hoping it’d be Megumi,” Gojo pouts.

“Just be happy he’s with his friends right now,” Iori says.

“I am! I’m super happy!” He insists. His phone buzzes once more and his eyes trace over the screen a few times before he reads, “‘It’s Megumi, delete that right now, Yuuji’s dead by the way,’ should I be worried?”

“Nah, he loves Itadori way too much to kill him.” Geto says.

That's something they can all agree on.

•

Slowly, their friends seem to wander off one by one, eventually leaving Nanami and Haibara alone together.

With his drink settling in to blur the edges and no further distractions, Nanami finally gets a good look at what Haibara is wearing; he’d caught a few glances earlier but couldn't quite see it clearly, or otherwise was distracted. But now he sees it, a red, fine knit sweater with a reindeer on it with bold white text on top that reads: “I’VE BEEN NICE”.

Nanami suppresses a chuckle, smiling into his glass as he mumbles, “Haibara, your sweater… really suits you.”

The brunette perks up, looking at him with shining eyes and a heartfelt smile, “Thank you, Nanami!”

A beat passes before Haibara speaks again.

“And, of course, I noticed you're wearing the tie I bought you. I’m really happy you are.”

“Yes, well, it's the only Christmas-themed item I actually own,” Nanami begins, “And besides, it was a gift from you.”

“Hey, is that your way of saying you don't actually like it?”

“No, I love anything from you.” Oh God, that was way too honest.

Haibara hesitates, then all at once he pounces on him in a crushing hug, knocking the both of them over in the process, “You're so sweet, Nanami,” He says, squeezing the blonde man.

“Hai—Haibara, what are you doing?” Nanami asks, his voice faltering.

“Just huggin’ you!” Haibara says, nuzzling against him like a cat, “Is that allowed?”

“I… guess.” Nanami says, unsure, “People don't normally hug like this,” Still he can't find the strength to pry him off in case someone wanders in. In fact, he wants to hold him, he wants to touch him, but the position is just too compromising.

“Who cares? There's nothing normal about being a jujutsu sorcerer but someone's gotta do it, right?”

“Sure, if you put it that way.”

“Woah, what’s going on guys?” Huh? Gojo's voice suddenly speaks up from somewhere in the room. Nanami feels his blood run cold. Haibara just smiles and climbs off of him.

“Oh, hi,” Haibara says, sounding a hint flustered, “Nothing, I was just messing with Nanami.”

Nanami sits back up, ignoring the distinct feeling of Gojo’s gaze on him as he situates himself back at the kotatsu. Gojo sits across from them, holding a plate of cake and a can of soda.

Since he’s both allergic to peacefulness and obsessed with the sound of his own voice, Gojo starts yapping right away, narrowly avoiding speaking about whatever it was he walked in on. Despite the fact that he’s the one talking, Haibara still has his eyes on Nanami; he can feel it, like a pressure he isn't sure what to do with. Not that he doesn't like it, because he does, but with the combination of a little bit of drinking and Haibara's pretty brown eyes, it starts to make him run a bit too hot.

While Gojo is in the middle of a rant about the sweets shop in Fukuoka he loves being closed the day he was there for a mission, he slips away for some fresh air. Discreetly, he steps into a pair of slippers and walks out into the chilled air. Outside he finds Ieiri and Geto, sharing a cigarette, even though the former insists she’s quit and the latter never claimed to be a smoker.

The faint sound of the patio door sliding shut alerts the two of Nanami’s approach.

They both turn to him, and Ieiri speaks first, “Come to join us?” She asks, offering the cigarette out to him half-jokingly.

Nanami holds a hand up, “No, just needed some fresh air.”

“If you're sure,” She says, taking one last drag before putting the cigarette out on the concrete floor—out of respect, he can practically hear her saying. “There’s never a better time to start than now. I’ve never met a sorcerer who died from lung cancer.” She says, way too nonchalantly, as she rises back to her feet to meet his eyes.

“I’ve never met a doctor who gives worse medical advice.” Nanami says bluntly, Geto laughs at that.

“I’ll take that,” She says, throwing her hands up in defeat.

“You better,” Geto then says, “It's actually scary some of the horrible advice you've given me.”

Nanami’s eyes flit to Geto, and only then does he notice that atop his head is a pair of reindeer antlers; he has to bite back his grin, but he still mumbles, “Santa’s reindeer, huh?” It's meant for himself, really, he’s not expecting for Geto to hear, but of course he does.

Geto looks back over at Nanami, “Yeah, Satoru insisted. As you can tell… he loves Christmas.”

“That's an understatement.” Ieiri remarks.

“Yeah, but it’s one of the few times of the year we can all get together and have a good time,” Geto says, “So… I understand why he loves it.”

There's a hushed pause between the three of them as they think about that. It's true, they're all good friends, but it's rare that they get to spend time together like this. Christmas is the time they get together—and if they're lucky, they have small gatherings on birthdays, but with each sorcerer having such a busy schedule, that's even more difficult to manage.

“I’ve never been one to particularly care about the holidays, but when you put it like that,” Nanami speaks up, “I understand as well.”

“Yup, same here.” Ieiri says casually, then wraps her arms around herself, “Alright, I’m going in now, it's way too cold out here.” She's gone before either of them can reply, but they both mutually agree it is too cold, and follow shortly behind her.

Haibara had made his way back into the kitchen and was in the middle of cracking open another beer. He freezes like a deer in headlights, staring at them like he had just got caught doing something he wasn't supposed to. Ieiri and Geto laugh at the sight and continue off into the living room, Nanami makes his way over to him.

“Getting into trouble?” He asks.

Haibara blushes, looking away, “No, ‘course not.”

Nanami smiles at the sight and he just can't tear his eyes away from him, so when Haibara looks back at him, they make eye contact and he swears there's something between them for a moment. Even for just a moment, a small electric charge or a buzzing connecting them that nobody can disturb.

That brief connection is severed when Haibara glances at the drink in his hand, then takes a sip and immediately grimaces, “Ugh, that's nasty.”

“It isn't supposed to taste good.”

“Nanami,” Haibara whines his name and Nanami feels his resolve waver. “What should I do? I don't want to waste it, but it’s really gross.” He continues, brows upturned and a small, rarely seen frown appearing on his lips.

Nanami exhales, easily won over, “Fine, I’ll drink it. Pick something else, but you have to drink whatever you open next.”

“Thank you, Nanami! You're a lifesaver!” Haibara cheers, handing off his beer, “What would I ever do without you?”

“I think you’d be just fine,” Nanami says, tasting the beer himself and—oh, Haibara was right, it is fucking nasty. He glances at the brand and sighs; it's one of the cheapest, most low quality beers that mostly broke college students drink. Why it's here and why he now has to drink it is completely beyond him, but he will power through.

“I don't think so.” Haibara says, all of the sudden, sounding melancholic.

“What?”

“I don't think I’d be fine without you,” He says, and even his expression is a little sad, “I think I need you, Nanami.”

Nanami’s chest aches; that sounds like a confession, it really does, but Haibara's been drinking so he can't take his words so seriously.

“You can't say things like that to me when you’re drunk, Haibara.” Nanami forces the words out.

“I’m not drunk.”

Nanami opens his mouth to speak, but before he can say anything, the kitchen door flies open.

“Hey! What're you guys doing in here?” Gojo asks, strolling over to them, throwing an arm over Nanami’s shoulder and looking to Haibara, “He’s not bullying you, is he?”

Nanami scoffs, shrugging him off.

Haibara just laughs and shakes his head, “No, why would you think that?”

“‘Cause you had a sad look on your face!” Gojo explains, reaching out to poke at Haibara’s cheek. Nanami has half the mind to snatch away his hand, but he doesn't, Haibara is smiling too pretty.

“We were just talking, that's all.” The brunette says, and that seems to clear up Gojo’s worries.

“Alright then,” Gojo says, “Come join us out here, now.” It sounds like a request, but he doesn’t give them the chance to turn him down, as he pulls them both by the arms out into the living room.

“There they are! Were you hiding out in there?” Ieiri asks.

“No, of course not!” Haibara says.

They regroup with their friends and their festivities—a.k.a., drinking, eating and having meaningless conversations—continue.

•

A few hours later, as the party seems to be simmering to an end—everyone quietly broken off into their own little groups, the faint music playing in the background being the perfect soundtrack for aimless conversations—Ieiri suddenly stands in the middle of the room with her hands on his hips. That action alone is enough to pull everyone's eyes to her, but she still speaks up.

“Hey! Everyone listen up!” So they do, “I just thought of a great game for us to play!” She announces.

“What game?” Gojo perks up.

“Spin the bottle!”

Nanami groans, pinching the bridge of his nose. He was not drunk enough for that.

He expects Gojo to refuse, but he seems kind of… enthused. It’s confusing but it only makes Nanami want to play even less.

But then Haibara speaks and it's like his ears are tuned to only hear him, he says, “Well… I guess I’ll play. It's nothing serious, it's just a game.” Nanami feels sick, he doesn't want to see Haibara kiss anyone else, or be touched by anyone else, or be friendly with anyone else. He so badly wants that man for himself, it's driving him insane.

So when Ieiri asks, “Nanami, you gonna play? C’mon say yes.” He complies, he has to.

They assort themselves in a circle on the floor, an empty beer bottle in the middle of them. Nanami can't find it in himself to sit next to Haibara, as juvenile as it sounds, so he settles for sitting across from him. Being able to watch him is enough, it has to be.

Somehow, everyone agreed to play, with one exception; that being Iori. She outright refuses, mimicking a gag at the idea of kissing any of them—besides Ieiri, she lovingly clarified.

However, she’s eventually convinced into sitting in just so she can mess with the rules.

She explains it like, “I’m not kissing any of you losers, obviously that doesn’t count for Shoko, but still. For me, whoever it lands on, I’ll give you a truth or dare.” Iori goes on, “Otherwise, I’m just observing.”

“So, you're just making shit up while we have to actually kiss each other?” Geto asks, unamused.

“Correct! Now spin.”

With a long-winded sigh, Geto spins the bottle in the middle of their circle. They all watch in anticipation until it lands pointing towards Gojo, who sits directly next to him.

Iori scoffs a laugh, “Doesn't that figure, you've even got fate supporting you two. Gross.”

“Shut up!” Gojo groans back at her, turning to face Geto with a grin.

“Well, aren't you pleased?” Geto says lowly. Nanami can just barely hear it from where he sits on the other side of Gojo.

“I am,” Gojo answers, leaning in to meet his lips.

Geto kisses Gojo like he’s done it a hundred times, and he’s still not satisfied. Nanami’s seen them kiss before—not on purpose, obviously—but it always looks like this, like they're drowning in love with each other. Like they just can't get enough of each other. Nanami envies it so badly it makes his chest hurt.

He wants what they have, and he wants Haibara to want it with him. If he could have that, life would make sense. Life would be worth living.

He watches as they pull away from each other, lingering just a moment to hold eye contact that speaks more volume than any words could say in that moment. Then.

“My turn!” Haibara chimes, sounding a little too giddy, spinning the bottle enthusiastically.

Somehow, it seems to turn for much longer this time. It couldn't have been, but time seems to stretch on. Until it finally lands on Geto.

Everyone stills for a moment—like this wasn't exactly what they signed up for—looking between the two of them. Nanami’s stomach twists at the mere thought.

“Haibara, it's okay if you don't want to.” Geto says softly beside him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Haibara turns to meet his eyes, smiling and shaking his head. “It’s okay, Geto,” He finds himself glancing over at Nanami, briefly, but in that moment he catches the slight crease between his brows. It makes him hesitate, but still he says, “I don't mind.”

Nanami however, minds. He doesn't voice it, in favor of not being an asshole during a completely harmless game but he can't help but notice a pattern forming. Both turns landed on the person sitting next to the player; could someone be manipulating the bottle? He subtly glances around—it doesn't seem like anyone is using a technique, and using it for something so foolish would just be a waste of energy.

But if they had some personal gain, something to motivate them?

He’s drawn from his rambling thoughts when Ieiri says, “I can't believe you're actually doing it.”

His eyes flit over and he sees it. Geto’s kissing Haibara.

Geto doesn't kiss him the way he kisses Gojo, that much is a relief. He kisses him exactly how one might kiss their friend in a game of spin the bottle, of course, it lacks passion or intimacy. Though, it's undeniably gentle and caring; a hand on his jaw and lingering slightly longer than Nanami can stomach the sight of.

When he pulls away, he says, “Alright, happy now?” seemingly to Ieiri, who’s looking way too pleased at seeing him kiss someone other than Gojo.

“Hell yeah, that was hilarious!” Ieiri replies.

Haibara makes a conflicted expression, eyes downturned for a moment. Before Nanami has the chance to express his concern, the game continues on.

Sitting next to Haibara is Iori, and since she’s already made clear that she isn't participating other than dosing out dares—or truths if she feels kind—the next player is Nanami. Looking a little peeved, he spins the bottle, not particularly with much effort. Quickly, it lands on Iori.

Again, the person next to the player. It can't be a coincidence.

He visibly deflates.

Ieiri laughs at the sight.

“Nanami, you okay?” Haibara asks.

“No, I think I’m done playing this childish game.” Nanami replies, and it comes out a little more clipped than he intends. The last thing he wants is to be harsh with Haibara.

“Nope, not until you finish this dare.” Iori says, “I’ve got the perfect one too.” Everyone looks in her direction, “Nanami, you and Haibara have to spend seven minutes in heaven.”

Nanami scoffs, “Unbelievable. That is the most absurd request you could've come up with.”

As if that was a challenge, Ieiri interjects, narrowing her eyes at him, “Fine, then do it with Gojo instead.”

“Oookay.” Geto cuts in, suddenly interested in the conversation at the sole mention of Gojo's name, “Let's not get hasty. Why don't we ask what Haibara thinks.” He looks over to the man in question, “Haibara, thoughts?”

Haibara grins brightly, that beautiful smile that could light up the darkest room, and says, “Well, I don't mind. It's… for the game, right?”

“Then it's settled!” Iori says, clapping her hands together, ignoring the fact that Nanami never agreed to anything.

Despite that, he still finds himself rising to his feet with Haibara and walking with him to the nearest closet; it was out of earshot but one they can still see clearly. Once inside, it quickly becomes obvious how little space there is, practically none. Haibara's back presses against the nearest wall, cool and solid. Nanami has no choice but to lean in close, bracing his hands on the wall beside Haibara’s head.

It's dark, but as their eyes adjust to it, they can barely make out each other's faces and their soft expressions.

They're quiet for a while, or maybe for an eternity, time seems to be passing differently in this small shared space. But when the silence is eventually broken, it's Nanami first.

His voice no higher than a whisper, he asks, “Haibara, did you like it when Geto kissed you?” He’ll thank the shield of the darkness for shedding him of his inhibitions, in the light of day, he’d likely never be able to ask something like that so frankly. The dull buzz in his bones helps a fair share as well, but being pressed so close in Haibara’s personal space is mighty sobering.

It's so faint, he almost doesn't hear it, but Haibara’s breath hitches in his throat. Nanami grins at the reaction, giving him time to reply.

“Nanami,” Haibara starts, “Why are you asking something like that?”

Well, he's committed, now he has to follow through.

“Because I didn't like it. I didn't like seeing him kiss you.” Nanami tells him, leaning in a little closer, “Because…” He takes a breath, there's definitely no going back now, “I wanted to be the one kissing you.”

A pause. A really long pause. Then.

“Well, kiss me.”

Oh. Nanami can almost—no he can feel time stop—the moment ceases just for them. He closes the distance between them and presses a soft, chaste kiss to his lips. It's short-lived, but when he pulls away he doesn't go far.

A beat passes between them, long enough for Nanami to start thinking it all might've been a bad idea. Then every thought in his mind is silenced when Haibara grabs him by his tie, reeling him in and kissing him hard. After the half-second delay of him being surprised by Haibara’s assertiveness, he kisses him back.

Nanami’s hand reaches in the darkness to cup Haibara’s jaw, his thumb rubbing absentmindedly against his cheekbone. Nanami licks along the seam of his mouth, and Haibara eagerly welcomes him in, weakly moaning at the intrusion—and fuck he wants to hear that sound again.

He presses closer, trying to taste every bit of him—the sweets he had and the bitter alcohol he drank. All of it, he wants it all if it's Haibara.

His head swims, from arousal or lack of oxygen, he isn't quite sure. Either way, he pulls away and he can feel the saliva briefly connecting their lips. He's suddenly very upset they're in the dark, but it only lasts a moment, as he quickly distracts himself by kissing Haibara’s jaw experimentally.

Just as he had hoped, Haibara tilts his head, and Nanami travels farther. He kisses down his neck, leaving an open-mouthed kiss over his pulsepoint, feeling his heartbeat against his lips, so close.

Nanami groans—he needs him more than life itself. Testing the limits more, he slots his knee between Haibara’s thighs, pressing against his groin and the brunette moans with surprise. He cants his hips against him, muttering, “Ah—Nanami, it feels good.”

Nanami pulls back just enough to speak, “Yeah? You like that?” He asks, and it's a little teasing, he’ll admit. But the whine it evokes from Haibara’s throat is worth it.

Nanami rocks his thigh against him and continues mouthing at his neck, teeth grazing at sensitive skin. It's not enough to mark but just enough to rile him up even further, making him squirm under Nanami’s strong, wandering hands. His fingers dip underneath the soft fabric of his sweater, meeting heated skin, and instantly he's addicted.

Haibara shudders, grabbing onto the blonde’s biceps, not to stop him but to encourage him further.

Nanami traces his fingertips over the ripples of his toned stomach, silently memorizing the location of every scar he comes across. His fingers finally land on his hardened nipples, which he doesn’t hesitate to pinch and prod at.

Haibara is so responsive. He’s panting and whining and rutting against Nanami’s leg with so much desperation, it’s driving him crazy. It’s so good but Nanami knows there's more he can do for him.

“Haibara,” He starts, his hands abandoning the gentle abuse to Haibara’s chest to rest low on his hips instead, “Can I touch you?” He asks, deep and right next to his ear.

The brunette trembles faintly, “Yes, yes.”

Nanami’s hands slip from his hips, his fingers making quick work to undo Haibara's belt buckle and unzip his pants. He instinctively pushes against the slight friction on his crotch, whimpering when Nanami withdraws his hands.

“You're so eager,” The blonde says, voice hushed and amused.

Haibara nods, a bit frantic, his breathing already unsteady, “Uh-huh, I want you.”

Nanami can't possibly wait any longer, he lowers his pants and boxers just enough to free his cock and right away his hand is wrapped around, not quite stroking yet but just feeling him. Tracing the shape of the prominent veins and ghosting along the underside of the head.

“Na—Nanami, take it easy,” Haibara says, already breathless, “You're gonna kill me.”

Nanami smiles, he's never been so in love.

“You're so sensitive, I’ve barely touched you.” He says. Rather than tease him any further, Nanami pulls his wrist away enough to spit in his hand—not missing the needy whimper Haibara lets out, it's like music to his ears—then returns his grasp. And this time, he strokes him firmly, slow but steady and Haibara moans.

“Do you feel like you're dying?” Nanami asks, pressing a kiss to his jaw, “Don't worry, I won't let anything happen to you.”

“Nanami, it feels…” Haibara pants, bucking into his touch.

“Feels good?”

”Mhm, but…”

“But, what? Something wrong?” Nanami asks, ceasing his movements for the time being.

“Is there,” He takes in a short, shallow breath, starting again, “Is there really no light in here? I wanna see you.”

Nanami hums in thought, reaching up above them, feeling out for a pull chain. Aha—his fingers graze the familiar shape of a cord and he grabs hold, tugging on it and finally granting light onto the tiny space.

And it is so good to see Haibara; his face flushed prettily and his lips slick with spit, his cock hard and weeping. Nanami groans at the sight, taking him in his fist once again. Haibara inhales sharply, rocking into his grasp.

“You're so beautiful,” Nanami says, “You take everything so well.”

Haibara moans at the praise, “Nanami, kiss me, please.”

He's all too happy to comply.

He kisses him deep and heated, swallowing up every sound Haibara makes as he quickens his pace. He truly thinks he can get lost in the feeling of kissing him.

But suddenly—once his mind has gone completely radio silent—Haibara separates them carefully, still pretty much close enough to pant against his mouth but not enough to taste him.

Then he asks, ”Hah—Nanami, are you gonna let me touch you, too?” He goes on to say, “I appreciate the attention but I’m getting… a little shy being the only one with his dick out.”

Nanami chuckles, “You're more than welcome to touch me, if you'd like. I didn't want to force it on you, though.”

“You're not forcing anything on me, Nanami,” Haibara says, tone laced with the slightest bit of frustration, “I just wanna touch you.” It comes off like he's asking for permission again, but his fingers are quickly unbuckling his belt and unbuttoning his slacks. As soon as Nanami’s cock is exposed, Haibara’s eyes widen like saucers and he stares unabashedly.

Nanami clears his throat, suddenly feeling a little embarrassed by Haibara’s undivided attention directed right at his dick.

“Damn, Nanami,” The brunette says, his eyes flashing back up to meet Nanami’s own, “You’re big.”

“Oh, well—I suppose.” Nanami says, closing his eyes for a moment.

Then Haibara takes him in his hand, fingers already slick with his own saliva, and Nanami doesn't have the foresight to withhold the groan that rumbles in his throat. He opens his eyes and Haibara looks very content.

They fall into a steady rhythm, matching each other's pace for a while until Haibara starts to get lost in the heat of it all. Nanami chuckles, he doesn't mind, just the opposite really. He's pleased it's his hands making Haibara lose his footing, and if it goes his way, it’ll stay that way.

He slows his movements, “Haibara, hold on a moment.”

The brunette obliges, frowning when Nanami nudges away his hand, “Was I not doing a very good job?” He asks.

Nanami kisses the scar along his cheek, “You were doing great, but I think this will be better for both of us.” He reassures him as he gathers both of their lengths in his hand, giving a paced, exploratory stroke. Haibara shudders, breath torn from his lungs as he rushes to hold onto Nanami’s shoulders.

“Fuck, okay.” He says on an exhale, pulling Nanami into a kiss.

Nanami can’t help but feel a little proud, smiling against his lips as his fist finds a comfortable pace—it’s casual at first but quickly picks up speed. They're both pent up; Haibara's thrusting up into his hand and moaning into his mouth.

They continue like that until Haibara throws his head back, squeezing his eyes shut, face contorted in pleasure. Nanami takes the opportunity to tenderly attack his neck, careful to not mark him quite yet.

“Ngh—I wish you could—oh fuck—wish you could fuck me for real right now,” Haibara manages, words caught between moans, “I’d be—I swear I’d be so good for you.” He practically cries out—God, he's really vocal, and it's going straight to Nanami’s dick. His head is so clouded by love-lust, he can't even try to be concerned about how much noise they're making.

You're so loud. He hears the words in his brain but he can't find the strength to voice them, too fixated on making Haibara make more noises. Then, like he can hear Nanami’s thoughts, the brunette says:

“I forgot we were supposed to be playing a game.” Haibara murmurs, in a short moment of composure, “I sure hope—nngh—no one walks in on us.”

“Wouldn’t want that, hm?”

He shakes his head, bordering on distressed, “No, ‘cause,” He sucks in a shaky breath, “Don't want you to stop. Please—don’t stop.”

“I won't,” Nanami says, surprisingly calm, “I can't, I wanna hear more of you.”

Haibara whines at that, already giving him exactly what he wants. Nanami tightens his grasp, stealing another sweet moan from Haibara.

“Kento.” He calls his name needily.

“Yes?”

“Do you—hah—do you love me?”

Nanami’s brain stalls for a second, his heart leaping from his chest as he says, “Yes, I do.”

“Say it.”

“I love you,” Nanami declares instantly, “I love you, I love you.” It feels like his heart is finally cracking open and spilling out all the feelings he’s been keeping inside for him, it's so intensely freeing he nearly starts to cry.

Haibara moans brokenly, pulling him closer, “Kento, I love you,” He sobs, “Please, keep loving me.”

Nanami frowns—that sentence evokes a pang of discomfort in his chest, “I could never stop loving you.” He assures.

Haibara nods, love-drunk and dazed, “‘Kay, I think… I’m gonna cum soon.”

“Go on, baby, cum for me.” Nanami encourages; the petname is a slip-up, but he doesn't dwell on it. In fact, he doesn't need to, because as soon as the sentence leaves his lips, Haibara shakily moans and spurts cum all over his hand. Soon was an understatement.

“Fuck,” Nanami mutters and strokes him through the aftershocks, before carefully removing his hand.

“Kento, please,” Haibara says, still out of breath, “Let me help you out.” He pushes Nanami half a step away—about as far as he can get in the cramped closet—before sinking to his knees.

Nanami’s mouth runs dry at the sight before him, one he has only seen in his fantasies, one that he never imagined he would get to see in real life.

“Can I?” Haibara asks, fingers grazing the base of his dick.

“I won't last.”

“You don't have to,” Haibara says, nuzzling against his thigh, “You can even fuck my mouth, if you want.”

Nanami takes a breath through his nose and tries his damndest not to sound desperate when he finally says, “Alright.”

Permission granted, Haibara doesn't hesitate for a second longer before wrapping his plush lips around the tip and taking in as much of the length that will fit into his perfect mouth. And his mouth is perfect—it’s unlike anything Nanami has experienced before, exactly tight enough, warm and so wet. He doesn't seem particularly experienced, but he compensates well with his enthusiasm, moaning around his cock like he’s getting off on the act.

Nanami knew at that moment, he was completely ruined for anyone else. Nobody else on earth would ever compare to Yuu Haibara, not in a million years.

But he was fine with that, he knew Haibara was the one for him since they became classmates in high school. He decided way back then that he’d never want anyone else.

And how could he now when he has his epitome of excellence at his knees.

Nanami slips his hand—his clean one—into Haibara’s hair, holding gently and guiding him steadily.

Nanami thinks he can watch this forever—the sight of Haibara bobbing on his cock so earnestly, swallowing him down more and more each time—but he can feel the end creeping near before he’s ready. He almost has the nerve to pull him off just to edge himself, but he knows he can't do that, he's still partially aware of where they are and they really do need to be wrapping things up.

He honestly would hate to get walked in on with his dick down his best friend's throat. Or, now that he thinks about it, the possessive part of his brain doesn't mind it entirely. But he wouldn't want to put Haibara in that situation.

So, when the familiar heat starts boiling low in his gut, he's relieved. He groans, clenching his jaw.

“Yuu, I’m—” Nanami chokes out, gripping his hair a little tighter.

Haibara holds firmly onto the back of Nanami’s thighs, keeping him in place. He closes his eyes and he looks so focused, his brows drawn together as he pushes himself to take in all of Nanami’s cock.

“That’s it,” He sighs, his voice coming out sounding a little foreign.

The brunette hums around him, sparks of pleasure rippling up Nanami’s spine, and that's all it takes. He holds Haibara's head in place and cums down his throat, pressing in a little deeper.

Just as soon as Nanami finishes and re-gains his bearings, he releases his grasp, pulling away his hand, “I’m sorry, that was…” He trails off, breathless.

Carefully, Haibara pulls off and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, then he looks up at Nanami, entirely lovestruck and as happy as can be, “Don't apologize, that was nothing. I’m tough enough.”

“I know you are.” Nanami says, tone laced with affection as he smoothes out the others now-tousled hair.

Haibara presses a kiss to his hipbone before helpfully tucking his cock away in his boxers and zipping up his pants, carefully buckling his belt and sliding it into the belt loop. The considerate gesture is almost enough to get Nanami hard again, but he wills his body to relax.

He then straightens out his own appearance, rising to his feet with a satisfied smile. He comes in for a kiss, but Nanami stops him with a hand on his chest.

“Yuu, what should we do about this?” He asks, holding up his other hand, which is still covered in Haibara's cum.

“Mm, the evidence,” Haibara says, humming in thought, then adds, “Oh, I know!” He reaches down and rips off his sock, offering it out to him.

Nanami exhales, reluctantly accepting it and wiping the mess of his hand, “Now what do you plan to do with it?”

Haibara takes back the dirty item, rolling it up the best he can before stuffing it in his pocket, “Problem solved!”

Nanami pinches the bridge of his nose, “You’ll look foolish walking around with one sock on.”

Haibara huffs, taking off the other sock and putting it in his pocket alongside the ‘evidence’.

“Well, the others are definitely going to notice your lack of socks, now.”

“Kento.” Haibara whines, “It doesn't matter. I can deal with a little embarrassment.”

“Alright,” Nanami says in a huff, stepping closer and holding the other's face in his hands, “Yuu…”

“Mhm?”

“I love you, I wasn't just saying that to satisfy you.”

“Well, I love you, so does that mean we can stop playing around and be together for real?” Haibara asks.

“Yeah,” He doesn't even get to say ‘if that's what you want, of course’, before Haibara kisses him. It's different this time, it's not rushed, it doesn't feel like either of them will disappear at any moment. Like they know this is something they’ll be getting used to very soon.

When Haibara pulls away, he says, “Ready to face them? ‘Cause they for sure have a good idea of what we were doing in here,” He adds, “Plus, it's been way longer than seven minutes!”

“We certainly can't stay in here forever.” Nanami says.

So, bracing themselves for the worst and hoping for the best, they slowly open the closet door and try to manage a nonchalant exit. To Nanami’s surprise, everyone is still sitting on the floor in a now semi-circle, but to absolutely no-ones surprise, all of their friends are wearing their own brand of ‘I Know What You Were Doing In There’ expressions.

From Gojo sporting a smug smirk to Iori’s disturbed look, it was blaringly clear that they were heard by everyone.

Gojo is the first to break the silence, “Congratulations!” He cheers, throwing his arms in the air.

“Thank you!” Haibara replies far too fast.

Nanami looks over so quickly he almost gets whiplash. That is not the type of response he’d prepared for, but the fact he isn't denying that something happened was oddly comforting.

“Yeah, congrats or whatever. Next time just don't do it in my linen closet.” Ieiri says, voice lacking any bite.

Haibara chuckles nervously, rubbing the back of his neck, “Yeah, sorry about that.”

“I apologize, as well,” Nanami says.

“Well, now that that’s over with, are you gonna come back over here with us or stand over there all night?” Gojo asks.

Nanami glances down at his watch; he’d completely lost track of the time. He needs to leave soon if he wants to catch the last train, Haibara does too.

“I have to go now,” Nanami informs the group, a little stiff.

Gojo frowns, “But why? And what's with that tone? We don’t care that you fucked in the closet, Nanamin.”

“We didn't—” He stops himself, not wanting to get into the subject any further, “I have to catch the train.”

“You can crash here, Nanami,” Ieiri tells him, “And Haibara, that includes you too. I have two spare bedrooms that go to waste all year long. But one's already been reserved by these bozos.” She gestures between Gojo and Geto.

‘I really don't want to impose.” Nanami says.

“I really don't mind. They might impose on you though,” She says, starting to ramble without even listening, “Those two will fuck anywhere, especially in other people's houses. Maybe you guys got something in common.”

Geto scoffs, “We’re right here, y’know?”

Nanami sighs, his patience wearing thin. Then, Haibara takes him by the arm and says, “Kento, let’s catch the train together, okay?”

Ah, it's like peace has been restored.

He nods. Haibara tells the others they're leaving together and pulls him to the entryway before they can protest. They pull on their shoes and coats, and when they step out into biting cold air, Nanami glances to the sky. The clouds have parted, leaving a perfectly clear view of the stars sparkingly in the sky. The moon is full and bright, like a beacon of hope shining down upon them as they make their way towards the train station.

They walk in comfortable silence for a little while, before Haibara clears his throat, subtly indicating he has something to say.

“You know,” He begins, “On my way over, I ran into Geto. We actually walked together for quite a while, that's why we showed up at the same time.” He trails off a bit, clearly dancing around what he wants to say exactly.

Nanami hums a noise of acknowledgement.

Haibara continues, “We were talking and he asked me… what I was looking forward to most in the new year.”

“What did you say?”

Haibara takes Nanami’s hand, linking their fingers. Their hands fit together so well, so flawlessly, like it truly was meant to be. Like they were crafted for one another.

“I said I was looking forward to spending more time with you.”

Nanami swears he feels his heart stop beating for a moment. Even after everything that's happened tonight, hearing Haibara say something like that makes him weak.

“Did you… honestly say that to him?” He asks, just because he needs the confirmation.

“Yes, I did.”

“And, what did he say?”

“He wished me good luck, and said he hopes I get to spend a lot of time with you,” Haibara chuckles, “I think… the others knew how we felt about each other before we did.”

Nanami squeezes the other man’s hand, “I think you're right.”

A beat passes before, “Now let’s hurry before we miss the train,” Haibara says, tugging him forward, “Let’s go back to your place. You don't mind if I stay over, do you?” He asks, flashing a hint of a seductive smile over his shoulder.

Nanami chuckles at the display, shaking his head, “Of course I don't mind.”

“Alright, let's go!” Haibara chimes.

“Okay, I’m coming!” Nanami says, one step behind, allowing the brunette to pull him along.

He doesn't even realize, but a grin finds its way to his face. He's so happy. For once, everything has worked out just as it should’ve.

He's really looking forward to the new year.