Work Text:
Kaminari doesn’t think he’s gay. Probably.
He’s always liked girls. He really likes girls, and has been with many of them. Girlfriends, one-night-stands, awkward spin-the-bottle makeouts in high school. You name it, he’s done it with a girl. He’s confident he likes them, and has never really felt anything in particular towards a guy. So the natural conclusion to that is that he’s straight.
A natural conclusion that comes crashing down around him during his second semester of college.
Kaminari entered the workshop for his literature class with Ashido and Sero, all of them agreeing to take it as a shared elective because apparently the lecturer lets everyone pick whatever they want to read. He only takes a few steps when Ashido whistles and softly murmurs, “Damn, the guy in the second row?”
Kaminari is very used to Ashido pointing out any hot guy she sees, so he thinks nothing of looking over at the guy. Usually he’ll just tease her or jokingly say ‘6’ to annoy her, but the words catch in his throat.
Because damn, the guy in the second row is gorgeous.
He’s hot in an effortless way, like Kaminari can tell he unironically just rolled out of bed and walked in here. His purple hair is messy and fluffy, severe bags reside under his eyes, and he’s only in a hoodie and jeans. There really isn’t anything particularly striking about him outside of natural good looks - a strong jaw, tall frame, resting bitch face and - oh, some piercings poking through his messy hair.
“Denki?”
It’s then that Kaminari realises he’s been staring way too long and turns back to a confused-looking Ashido and Sero.
“Uh… let’s sit further back,” Kaminari stutters, turning to bound up the stairs to find a seat.
~
Kaminari hopes it will be a passing thought, but as the weeks pass by he can’t stop staring at the back of that head of purple hair. He speaks up a lot in class so Kaminari quickly learns the guy has a deep, attractive voice to match his good looks. Damn it.
He’s smart too. Unlike Kaminari and his friends who opted to just pick their favourite manga for this class, the guy chose a French classic that he read in French and effortlessly answers the lecturer’s convoluted questions on imagery and themes. It would be infuriating if Kaminari didn’t find it so damn attractive.
“Dude, are you okay?” Sero asks him a few weeks into the course. They’re all meant to be discussing the differences between their chosen readings and writing up a diagram to present, but Kaminari has just been staring for the past ten minutes. “You keep looking at Shinsou.”
“Shinsou?” Kaminari asks.
“Hot guy in the second row from week one,” Ashido explains. “I overheard him talking to Professor Aizawa and that was what he called him.”
Shinsou…
“I just think it’s cool he speaks French,” Kaminari deflects. It’s not a total lie. “Let’s focus on the task.”
“Says you,” Sero rolls his eyes, but they let it go and work on the diagram together.
~
It happens four weeks into the semester.
Each week Kaminari follows the same routine of arriving in the back of class and staring at the back of Shinsou’s head while he half-heartedly talks about the manga he’s meant to be studying for this class.
Each week he asks himself; why? Why, after twenty years of sitting comfortably in the ‘straight’ territory, feeling nothing when he jokingly kisses the homies on the cheek, is he now entering a sexuality crisis over a random guy he hasn’t even spoken to?
Because Kaminari isn’t a total idiot, not about this at least. He knows that the way he’s obsessing over this guy cannot be considered normal curiosity. It clearly isn’t going away either - Kaminari knows he needs to do something soon or he’ll lose his mind.
“Alright everyone, remember that your first portfolio task is due tonight, see you next week” Professor Aizawa says, dismissing the class. The whole room begins packing up their things to depart, Kaminari doing the same on autopilot as he watches Shinsou shove his laptop away and stand to walk over to the front of the room. He often talks to the Professor after class, so that’s nothing new - but Kaminari notices something.
As Shinsou leaves his seat and hurries to the front, something falls out of his bag. It’s small and black, and if Kaminari squints he thinks it’s a phone or a hard drive or something. Shinsou is already chatting to Aizawa, clearly none the wiser on his lost item.
Here’s my chance, Kaminari thinks. The chance to do what exactly, he isn’t sure, but at the very least he might be able to come out of this with Shinsou actually knowing his name. He hovers in his seat, pretending to rummage around in his bag to pass the time while he waits for everyone to file out of the classroom.
“Kaminari, you coming?” Ashido asks.
“Oh, uh…” he glances down to the front of the room where almost everyone else has left and Shinsou is still talking to Professor Aizawa. “You guys go ahead. I need to ask the Professor something next.”
“Really?” she raises a disbelieving eyebrow.
“Want us to wait for you?” Sero asks.
“No, no. I’ll catch up with you later!” he waves them off.
They share a look, one that makes Kaminari wonder if they know what’s going through his mind. They seemingly decide not to push him on the subject though, bidding him farewell and turning to leave the classroom.
The room is almost empty now. Kaminari casually walks down the stairs towards Shinsou’s seat, pretending to be surprised to notice the phone on the floor even though nobody is watching him. He picks it up, glancing around as if looking for the owner, and - mostly on instinct - clicking the display on to see if he “recognised the homescreen”.
Nothing could have prepared him for the notifications he sees there.
XXX-XXX-123: $300 now and the rest after right?
XXX-XXX-123: already sent. Lets meet at this location on Friday (attachment).
XXX-XXX-456: Tipped you nicely for last weekend ;) I’ll offer double for bondage next time.
XXX-XXX-789: how much for a footjob?
Kaminari’s jaw drops. He only even looked at the notifications to fake trying to find the owner, he never in a million years would have expected something like this.
There’s no other way to interpret the messages, right? This is clearly some kind of sex work arrangement phone. And it was in Shinsou’s bag. Which means that Shinsou…
He looks up, seeing that Shinsou is waving goodbye to Professor Aizawa and turning to leave.
He doesn’t really think, he just jumps up and chases after him, catching him by the elbow at the entrance to the hallway. Shinsou jumps at the sudden contact, looking over his shoulder at Kaminari’s probably very red face.
“Uh… Can I help you?” Shinsou asks, still looking mildly concerned.
Kaminari struggles to get his mouth to move for a moment. He’s never seen Shinsou up close before. He’s definitely more human-looking, the dark circles under his eyes are way worse than Kaminari thought and his hair is teetering on the edge of ridiculously messy. It should break the illusion of perfection Kaminari had painted of Shinsou from afar, but he really doesn’t find himself any less enchanted.
“... Kaminari?”
Kaminari knocks himself out of his stupor, jaw dropping once again. “You know my name?”
It clearly isn’t as stupendous to Shinsou as it is to him, because he just shrugs. Kaminari manages to gather himself enough to let go of Shinsou’s elbow and stand in front of him like a normal person, clearing his throat.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to jump at you like that, uh…” he slowly raises his other hand where he’s still clutching the phone, presenting it to Shinsou. “You dropped this.”
Shinsou’s eyes slide down to the phone and his bored, slightly concerned expression immediately shifts. His eyes dart up over Kaminari’s shoulder, expression genuinely fearful as he checks that Professor Aizawa isn’t looking, before looking back at Kaminari and practically snatching the phone out of his hand. No care or decorum about it.
“Uh…” Kaminari mumbles, at a loss for words at Shinsou’s sudden change in demeanour. He usually portrays such a cool and aloof vibe, but he looks frantic right now. “... Are you okay?”
He doesn’t respond right away, glancing up past Kaminari one more time, fingers tightening around the phone he’s clutching to his chest. Just as Kaminari is about to ask again, Shinsou suddenly reaches over and grabs him by the elbow, dragging him along and out of the classroom door.
The hallway is fairly quiet this long after class, with most people on to their next class or off to lunch. Shinsou still pulls him over behind a vending machine so they’re out of sight of the few people wandering around.
Once they’re in somewhat-privacy, Shinsou lifts the phone from his chest and glances at the screen before shoving it back against him, head falling back with a frustrated groan. “Shit.”
Kaminari is still recovering from the sudden relocation - and Shinsou touching his arm! - but he gathers his thoughts enough to recognise that Shinsou’s reaction pretty much confirmed what he already knew after seeing the notifications.
Okay, Kaminari. Play it cool, he tells himself. He raises a shaky finger to point at the phone.
“So it is yours, then? And you do, uh… do that stuff?” He asks.
God, that wasn’t cool at all.
“Yeah…” Shinsou murmurs, eyes remaining awkwardly on the ground. “I’m sorry if this is awkward, but I really need you to not mention this to Aizawa…”
Kaminari’s nose wrinkles in distaste at the mere thought. “Why would I do that?”
“I…” he trails off, letting out a small sigh. “You’re right. Sorry I assumed.”
“Assumed?”
“That you wanted to blackmail me with it, or something…”
“What? I’d never do that! I mean, I was surprised but it’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
Shinsou doesn’t entirely look like he believes it, but nods slowly as he accepts that at the least, Kaminari won’t tell anyone. “Okay… Thanks, then.”
They fall into an awkward silence, hardly broken by the hum of the vending machine beside them. Kaminari wrings his hands together, desperately trying to think of what to say. The discovery of Shinsou’s work really threw off this whole interaction, it’s super awkward to ask ‘so what do you study?’ now.
Shinsou shifts from foot to foot a few times before eventually taking a step back. “Uh, thanks again. I’m just going to…”
Stop him! Say something!
“Wait!” he grabs Shinsou’s sleeve again to keep him in place before he can fully turn away. He looks over his shoulder in a mirror of their earlier conversation, but this time he looks even more confused. Kaminari is equally as confused - he doesn’t really know his plan here, just that he wants to keep talking to Shinsou and he doesn’t want him to avoid him even more because of this.
Kaminari doesn’t know what comes over him, his impulse control goes out the window and he blurts out the first thought that comes to him.
“C-Could I employ your services?”
… What?
Shinsou stares at him for a moment while he processes the sudden question. Then, his eyes narrow in suspicion, “Excuse me?”
“You’re a, uh… prostitute, right?” he lowers his voice on the last few words.
He doesn’t answer directly. “You’re looking for that kind of service?”
“I-I… I think so?”
He frowns. “From a guy?”
He doesn’t seem worried anymore, just confused. Kaminari looks him up and down again, still just as affected by him as he was back in his first class.
“Right now, specifically from a guy.”
Shinsou slowly turns all the way around, causing Kaminari to let go of his sleeve. He stares at Kaminari for a moment with an assessing gaze before slowly nodding.
“Okay, I understand,” he mumbles. He holds out his hand. “Give me your phone.”
Kaminari scrambles to pull his phone out of his pocket and hand it over, all the while screaming inside his mind that this is actually happening. Shinsou quickly types something out and passes it back, revealing a new contact under the name ‘Nighthide’.
“Let’s not arrange it here. Message me on that number and I’ll get back to you.”
“Okay…” Kaminari stares down at his new contact. It’s clearly the contact for Shinsou’s second phone and not his personal number, but it’s a major step. “I-I will. Text you.”
~
Kaminari holds it together all the way home before entering a full-blown panic.
What the hell had he just done?! He just wanted to talk to Shinsou, to see whether this crush - his first ever crush on a guy - had any legs. And now he has the phone number to meet up with him for paid sex?
He tries to imagine what that would look like. Shinsou must be good at it, he’s clearly experienced. Kaminari heats up at the idea of even something simple - even just Shinsou’s hands, or mouth… His face heats up quickly and he dives into bed to hide it in a pillow.
He asked on a total whim, but really this is kismet isn’t it? He is crushing on this guy, there’s no better chance to hook up with him than this! The worst case scenario is that he hates it and thanks Shinsou for the experimentation, under the guise of it just being because of his work and not because he actually likes him. It’s foolproof!
“... I can do this,” Kaminari whispers to himself. Before he can lose his nerve, he pulls his phone out of his pocket. It’s still open on ‘Nighthide’s contact, and he sends the message quickly.
Me: Hi. This is Kaminari.
The reply comes quickly.
Nighthide: Hey.
Nighthide: Tell me what you want to do and I can give you a price.
It’s incredibly blunt and to-the-point, and Kaminari is almost disappointed. Almost, because then his mind wanders to all of the possibilities. He had seen the messages earlier - bondage, feet - he’s not sure he wants anything that extreme, but there really is a litany of options out there, huh?
He ponders on it for a little while, but finds he can’t really picture anything beyond the usual. Even then, going all the way with a guy is a little frightening to him.
Me: I think I just want something small…
Nighthide: Well I might not be the right fit for you, then.
The implication is not lost on Kaminari, and his face burns red at the thought. He’d never given much thought to dick size - outside of his own - but finds himself suddenly very curious.
Me: That’s not what I mean.
Me: I’m just… new to this
Nighthide: Are you a virgin?
Me: No, it’s just with men.
Nighthide: I guessed as much.
It’s the first thing he’s said that indicates their earlier conversation. It’s almost nice to see that Shinsou had been paying attention, even if the subject matter is a little embarrassing.
Nighthide: How about this? Let’s meet up with no specific plan and you tell me what you want night-of.
Nighthide: Then depending if you can afford it we go ahead.
Nighthide: Bare minimums are about $100 for reference.
Kaminari imagines he won’t be satisfied with the ‘bare minimum’, so he makes a mental note to take out a lot of cash just in case. He was saving for a new PC but who needs it? He’s in the middle of a sexuality crisis here.
Me: That sounds good to me.
~
They made plans to meet on Friday at 11:00pm. They’re going to a love hotel because they both live with housemates and Kaminari certainly doesn’t want his to know about him experimenting with a guy - not like this, at least.
It’s not that he thinks there’s anything wrong with it, it’s more that it’s Shinsou. The guy who he’s been borderline obsessing over for no real reason for the whole semester. After the initial shock of discovering Kaminari (might) like men, Ashido would see right through him and realise why he’s really doing this.
Kaminari is rather anxious about the whole thing, despite all the pressure Shinsou had taken off by not pre-planning anything. Kaminari is left considering the possibilities, still failing to land on anything concrete in the few days before Friday rolls around.
Kaminari was worried about getting lost or running late, so he ends up arriving at the hotel address Shinsou had sent him a half hour early. He awkwardly approaches the clerk and stutters out the booking they had made under a generic name “Yamada”, and the disinterested young man just hands him a key and waves him on.
He makes his way through the elevators and halls to room 1207, glad he has time to take a breather once he gets inside. Unfortunately for him as he unlocks and opens the door, he sees that the room is already occupied.
Shinsou is standing near the bed wearing only a robe. He’s patting down his hair with a towel, water dripping down and along his exposed collarbones. He looks up, only mildly surprised to see Kaminari there.
“Oh, you’re early.”
“S-So are you!”
“Of course. I came to prepare,” he grins. It’s the first time Kaminari thinks he’s ever seen Shinsou grin, and it’s a little… unnerving. Like he’s planning something devious.
Kaminari awkwardly turns to close the door behind him, taking in a shaky breath before turning back around.
“Um… So do I give you the money now, or…?”
Shinsou glances away and Kaminari swears he’s hiding a laugh. He’s smiling kindly again when he looks back over, tossing his towel over the back of a chair and sitting back on the edge of the bed. He pats the space beside him. “Come here.”
Kaminari awkwardly toes off his shoes by the door and walks over to the bed, perching on the edge beside Shinsou. He’s leaning back on his hands, looking entirely comfortable, and it only heightens Kaminari’s insecurity at his own lack of experience with the situation.
It’s quiet for a moment before Shinsou eventually breaks the tense silence.
“You’re nervous.” It’s not a question.
“I am,” Kaminari confirms anyway. His eyes slide over to where Shinsou is now leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, head turned to assess Kaminari’s demeanour.
“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” he promises, “If it helps, we can stick to things that aren’t any different to women?”
That… sounds doable. “Oh, like uh, hands and stuff?”
Shinsou nods. Kaminari thinks about it - he would honestly like to take things pretty slow as he traverses this new side of himself, but…
“Isn’t it a waste? I mean you wouldn’t even make your money back on the hotel with that..”
“Don’t worry about the money for now,” he slowly brings a hand up to Kaminari’s face, resting it on his cheek and gently tracing a thumb along his jaw. “Penetration is not the be-all end-all of sex. Foreplay and other unique forms of pleasure can be just as satisfying, while not being too frightening.”
Kaminari finds himself nodding, quickly moved by Shinsou’s considerate words. It’s strange that the guy he’s paying for sex is actively guiding him towards a “low-cost” option, but Kaminari thinks it’s just that Shinsou probably doesn’t want to do something that his client isn’t comfortable with just to get a payout.
He’s knocked out of his little character dissection when Shinsou turns his face toward him with the hand he still had seated at Kaminari’s cheek, forcing their faces close together.
“Is kissing alright?” he asks.
Kaminari nods. “W-Why wouldn’t it be?”
“Some people don’t like it,” he says, slowly leaning in. “Never understood those types…”
Kaminari closes his eyes on instinct and all too quickly, warm lips are pressing against his. Kaminari responds enthusiastically, pressing closer and basking in Shinsou’s clean post-shower scent. He feels Shinsou’s hands settle on his waist and gently guide him to lay down on the bed, his own arms reaching out to hold Shinsou around the neck as he does.
This, he knows how to do, but despite what Shinsou said earlier it does feel very different to being with women. The hands on him are bigger and stronger, and the bicep under his own hands is nowhere near as soft as a girl’s. He smells so different, that might be the main difference - Kaminari is used to the scent of flowers and vanilla when he does this, but Shinsou is wearing something far muskier, and undeniably masculine. In that moment, Kaminari really can’t tell which he prefers.
Suddenly, Shinsou shifts position from lying next to him and throws a leg over Kaminari’s hips and sitting up, breaking the kiss. Kaminari gasps, knocked out of his thoughts by the action, eyes falling to the point they’re connected at the hips. Shinsou’s robe has fallen loose, revealing the black boxer briefs underneath that barely conceal his hardening erection. Kaminari’s eyes slowly trail up his torso, his neck, up to his face where he’s still grinning down at Kaminari with that mysterious glint in his eyes.
Kaminari’s head falls back to the pillow with a groan, because the sight of Shinsou like that utterly confirms it.
“Okay.” he mumbles, “Yeah. I’m into men.”
Shinsou actually laughs at that. “That’s all it took?”
“You’re… r-really hot,” he weakly defends.
“Thank you, but this really does make me wonder how you didn’t know earlier,” Shinsou leans forward, settling his hands either side of Kaminari’s head. He slowly grinds his hips forward, their clothed cocks slotting together and creating sweet friction. “Then again… If it lets me be the first one to see you like this, I can’t complain.
Kaminari blushes, turning his face to the side. Is this Shinsou actually flirting with him, or is he just doing his job? If it’s the latter, then he’s damn good at it.
Shinsou begins a slow rhythm of rolling his hips forward, quickly working Kaminari up to full hardness. He’s embarrassed by the noises the action draws out of him - he hasn’t been this worked up from just some grinding since he was a teenager!
“S-Shinsou,” he stutters, hands fisting in the front of Shinsou’s robe. “I’m ready, touch me…”
He slows to a stop, leaning down to peck Kaminari on the lips. “Of course. Let’s get you out of those pants.”
He moves to the side, reaching down to tug the waistband of Kaminari’s sweatpants down over his straining bulge, catching his underwear on the way and immediately rendering Kaminari bare under his eyes.
“You’re pretty,” Shinsou murmurs into his ear, hand ghosting over Kaminari’s cock up to his stomach, splaying his fingers out there instead and pushing his shirt further up. “I’d love to have all of you someday. You’d look perfect under me…”
Kaminari shivers at the compliments. A voice in his head wants to ask whether Shinsou means it, but he quickly shuts that voice down. He just wants to let himself enjoy this.
“Hurry up,” he complains, taking hold of Shinsou’s wrist and pushing it back south. Shinsou chuckles but complies, finally wrapping his hand around the base of Kaminari’s cock and slowly stroking from base to tip.
“W-Whoa…” Kaminari jerks at the contact. Shinsou’s hands are far rougher and bigger than any that have been on his cock before - more calloused than his own, in fact. It’s new. He likes it. “That’s…”
“Too rough?” Shinsou asks, but that wasn’t what Kaminari was thinking. Nonetheless, Shinsou pulls back and reaches into his robe to draw out a tube of lubricant, quickly squeezing a generous amount over his hand. “Sorry, baby. I was just trying to satiate your… impatience.”
The words themselves hardly even register in Kaminari’s head, instead the word ‘baby’ on Shinsou’s lips clattering around in his skull like the old logos on TV loading screens.
He seems to notice. He smirks and leans back down, face settling next to Kaminari’s ear as his slick hand takes hold of his cock again. “Do you like it when I call you that, baby?”
“Shit…” Kaminari groans, arousal spiking at the gruff voice in his ear combined with the - admittedly much more pleasant - slide of Shinsou’s hand on his cock.
“Tell me.”
Kaminari’s eyes widen at the sudden commanding tone and the paused grip around the base of his cock. Nothing sounds worse than Shinsou stopping right now, so the confession comes spilling out of him without him really thinking about it. “Yes, yes. I like it…”
“Mm, good…” his hand resumes its movement, fast and tight as he jerks Kaminari off. He’s half leaning over him, his taller frame making Kaminari feel small by comparison as he easily jerks him off and whispers in his ear at the same time.
“You’re so pretty for me,” he murmurs, squeezing around the tip and twisting his fist on the downstroke. “Already so worked up and we’ve only just started…”
“Oh, fuck…” Kaminari whimpers, eyes squeezing shut. He squirms against the mattress, one hand in the sheets next to his hip and the other on Shinsou’s chest. It’s barely been two minutes and he already feels himself getting close. “Oh god, oh… Shinsou…!”
Shinsou’s eyes glint in recognition. “Gonna come, baby?”
Kaminari shakes his head, but his rapidly increasing breaths tell a different story. Shinsou doesn’t help the situation, only speeding up his hand to draw Kaminari to that edge.
“It’s okay, baby. Let go. Show me what you look like when you feel good,” he murmurs, gently nipping at Kaminari’s neck just under his ear, and that’s all it takes for the coil in Kaminari’s belly to snap.
“Oh, fuck!” he moans, hips thrusting up into Shinsou’s hold as he comes. Shinsou keeps working him through it, whispering sweet compliments into his ear all the while. Kaminari wheezes slightly as he comes down from his high, body melting into the mattress in relaxation as he regains his breath.
Shinsou places light kisses on his temple as he pulls his hand away, wiping Kaminari’s spend off on his robe. Kaminari opens his hazy eyes to stare at the ceiling, face flushing red as the post-sex clarity hits him.
Oh god. He literally lasted two minutes. To a handjob.
“Oh my god,” he whispers, covering his face with both hands. “Holy shit. That was humiliating.”
Shinsou laughs - actually laughs, not one of his reserved chuckles from earlier, and Kaminari wants to bury himself in a hole and never come out. He peeks through his fingers to see Shinsou grinning as he rids himself of his dirtied robe and lies down next to him. Kaminari spots the - sizable, holy shit - erection tenting his underwear. Kaminari can’t help feeling a little proud knowing that he got Shinsou hard, even if Shinsou seems content to ignore it right now.
“Don’t worry about it, it was a new experience for you. Besides, I’ll take it as a compliment,” he says, relaxing on the mattress. “Are you alright, do you need anything? Water?”
“And they say chivalry is dead,” Kaminari mumbles sarcastically.
“I would call that common courtesy,” Shinsou shrugs, “But if you’re fine.”
They fall quiet for a minute after that, the last vestiges of the sexy atmosphere settling as Kaminari’s heart rate finally settles. He glances over a few times, slightly relieved to see Shinsou’s erection waning on its own - he feels bad, but he really isn’t ready for that yet.
He glances at the clock on the bedside table, wincing when he sees it’s only 11:15pm, it seriously took him no time at all. It feels like it’s been longer though, and Kaminari honestly feels exhausted despite how little they actually did.
As if reading his mind, Shinsou yawns. “If you want, you can sleep here tonight. The room is paid through to tomorrow.”
Kaminari sits up on his elbows, “Oh… Um, are you going to stay?”
He nods. “I told my, uh… my housemates that I’d be staying at a friend’s. It’d be weirder to go back now.”
“And it isn’t… extra, to spend the night with you?” he asks before really thinking about it.
Shinsou doesn’t seem offended, he just shakes his head. “Maybe if it was a creep I wanted to extort, yeah, but that’s really not the case here. I’d feel bad sending you packing now.”
Kaminari feels his face warm up. It’s not even that nice, it’s really just a common courtesy… but something delusional in him wants to believe he’s getting some kind of special treatment.
“In that case, I think it would be nice to crash here… Thanks.” he smiles.
Shinsou nods, groaning a little as he rolls back out of bed and stretches. “Well then, I’m going to have a shower. You can join me if you want but that would cost more, so beware.”
“I-I’m okay. I’ll go after,” Kaminari stutters. Shinsou’s voice is teasing, not like he actually expected anything, but it’s still frightening to think about the possibility of more right now.
“Of course, no pressure.”
With that he disappears into the bathroom, the door clicking shut behind him and finally leaving Kaminari alone with his thoughts. He stares at the closed door a minute before flopping back on the bed, rolling onto his stomach and shoving his face into the pillow.
Well, he achieved his goal. He’s had sex with Shinsou - sort of - and he’s fairly certain now that he must be bi or pan or something because he really liked it. But… He’s still confused.
Is Shinsou just doing his job? Was he hard because of Kaminari or just because of the stimulation? Does him letting Kaminari stay the night mean anything or is he just being nice? Does he at all feel the connection that Kaminari does?
He sits up and slaps both hands on his cheeks to knock himself out of his mental rambling.
“Relax…” he whispers to himself. It’s too much for him to unpack right now. He doesn’t want to ruin a good night with his own panic, so he takes a few deep breaths to calm himself.
He can do this. He won’t ruin this.