Chapter Text
Delivery days were always your favorite. Gaius would send you off with a basket of phials, each with a medicinal potion inside, along with a list of names and addresses. You didn’t have to stay cooped up inside all day with evil-smelling plants brewing in a pot over a fire and, more importantly, you didn’t have to clean anything, which you hated doing.
This being said, it explained why you were in such a bright mood as you wandered about the streets of Camelot, a basket on your arm and sheet of parchment in your hands. You’d already delivered about half of the treatments, the basket growing lighter with each stop you made. The speed at which you were delivering, you’d be back before dinner.
Walking up to the next house with a spring in your step, you knocked politely on the door. You did not need to wait long before someone answered it, a kindly old woman suffering from old-age aches and pains. She was regularly received potions from Gaius and had taken a liking to you.
“Hello, Laudine. How are you?” You asked, always happy to see her shining face, though wrinkled with age.
“Good afternoon, Y/N.” She greeted you with a fond smile. “I’m doing just fine. How are you today?”
“I’m doing well, thank you. Here’s your medicine.” You pressed the small bottle into her hands. “Gaius asked me to check up on how you’re doing. Has it been helping?”
Laudine nodded graciously. “Very much so. I feel almost young again!” She chuckled, reaching into her purse for a few coins to pay for the medicine. “I included a few extra.” She confided, dropping the coins into your hand, where they clanged together. “Those are for you. Buy yourself something. Or, maybe, buy something for that handsome man of yours! What’s his name, Merlin?” Laudine winked.
“Th-thank you, milady, but we’re not courting.” You blushed and tried to return the money she offered you, but she merely waved your hand away and insisted that you keep it. A shy smile on your face, you bid her goodbye and continued on your way.
“Goodbye, dear.” You heard her call after you before she headed back inside.
“ ‘Tis a shame to hear they’re not yet courting.” Laudine mumbled to herself.
The next house you were to stop at was on a street corner near the market place. Along the way, you passed throngs of people in the streets, gathered together and engaging in frantic, hushed conversations between each other. You caught only bits and pieces and couldn’t help but wonder what the whole story was.
“King Uther–”
“How horrible!”
“–I heard that Prince Arthur has to–”
“What does this mean for our–”
“–a curse on the Pendragons–”
Biting your lip, you tried not to let their words trouble you as you continued on your way.
—
“You don’t have to do everything he says, you know. You’re your own person.” Merlin pointed out, vehemently opposing yet another one of Uther’s decisions. This time, he’d chosen to enact a new series of laws that were both unorthodox and unfair. Already, the stockades were beginning to fill up, as well as the cells in the dungeon.
“I don’t have a choice, Merlin. How can you not understand that?”
“You always have a choice. Just go to Uther and tell him to repeal it. He’ll listen to you. You’re his son and you’re royalty, for gods’ sake. You have more important choices to make than the rest of us get in our entire lives. You have the power to actually do something and you don’t! The rest of us, when we speak up, we get our heads on spikes or burned at the stake! But you can actually make a different and you choose not to!” Merlin dropped the calm facade he’d so carefully been upholding and raised his voice.
“Shut up, Merlin. You have no idea what you’re talking about. You have no idea what it’s like to have a crown on your head. I don’t think your tiny brain could even begin to understand it. Just shut it.” Arthur made a quick slashing motion to his throat, most likely depicting what would happen to Merlin would he continue to speak.
“If you go though with this, I’m never going to speak to you again. ” Merlin threatened, through his anger never once spewing lies. He was dead serious. Arthur had gone too far.
“Fine, then. I’ll be so much better off without your stupidly annoying remarks in my ear. It will be peaceful around here for once.” Arthur sneered in response. The hurt he felt was placed in the only place he could trust it being: deep inside himself, never to see the light of day.
“I don’t think things could ever be peaceful around here, the way you behave. Not many people are willing to put up with you. I don’t know how I do it. ” Merlin folded his arms and stared the prince down. He was certainly not as accustomed to hiding his feelings as Arthur and he was becoming a bit red in the face from all the shouting.
“If you’re so unhappy with me, why don’t you just quit?” Arthur swung a punch in the general vicinity of Merlin’s head, which he easily ducked. Below everything, Arthur truly didn’t want to hurt him, but his emotions did.
“I won’t quit. I’m not a coward like you.” Merlin shot back. His pride had been wounded enough by this man! What gave him the right? A crown on his head?
“I’m the coward, am I? Fine then, I’ll just fire you. Then I won’t have to hear your stupid voice and you won’t have to 'put up with me!’ Get out of my sight!” Arthur shouted, pointing at the door. “Out! If I see you again I’ll have you thrown in the dungeon.”
Merlin stormed out the door and slammed it behind him. Pride mortally wounded, he rushed back to his room and slammed the door. He didn’t spare a glance towards Gaius, but if he had he would have seen the concern on the older man’s face. Merlin slumped over on his bed and tried his hardest to keep from crying. Arthur wasn’t worth it. Destiny wasn’t worth it.
There were times when Merlin thought that he and Arthur were friends. True, their friendship was rather atypical, but friendship was still present nonetheless. At least, that’s what he thought–used to think. Sure, there were times when Arthur outdid himself on being a pigheaded arsehole, but he always seems to come around and see some sense in the end. Not this time, however. This time from his arrogance there would be no simple apology in order to fix things. No, not this time.
Arthur had gone and screwed up past the point where Merlin thought he could forgive him. It had been another row, naturally. Merlin and Arthur fought like cats and dogs, but underneath it all they were friends. The key word being were. Merlin didn’t think he could be Arthur’s friend after what had happened. He didn’t have the masochistic tendencies to go through that again. No, no. He was done. Completely and utterly done.
—
By the time you returned back to Gaius’s chambers, your feet were sore, but you were content. Like you’d thought, you were back well before it was time to eat and you had a little bit of free time. Laudine’s gift of coins still jingled in your pocket and you hadn’t the slightest idea of what you wanted to spend it on.
“Hello, Gaius, Merlin, I’m back.” You smiled brightly, setting your basket down and untying the lace on your cloak. You hung it up on its hook and hummed to yourself, bustling around to deposit all the payment you’d collected for the potions into the jar where funds were kept.
“Where’s Merlin? Gaius?” You asked, wondering why your friend wasn’t waiting for you to return, like usual. You were more than surprised to find that Gaius wasn’t there either. “I’ve been talking to myself!” You mused, glancing over to Merlin’s room and finding the door closed. Merlin rarely kept his door closed during the day, he was usually to busy to remember to close it behind him when he went out each morning. Frowning, you knocked twice on his door.
“Merlin? Are you in there?” You called through before gently pushing your way into his room. Your frown deepened when you found him sprawled on his bed. “Are you okay?” You asked, biting your lip.
“Arthur sacked me.” He mumbled, turning over to face you. You were worried to find his eyes rimmed with red.
“Oh! I’m so sorry, Merlin!” You moved to sit on the edge of his bed. “Do you want to talk about it? If you don’t, that’s okay. Just remember that I’m here for you.” You offered, hating to see him so upset.
What you’d give to see him smile! In your brief time in Camelot (you’d arrived just a few weeks earlier) Merlin had quickly become your very best friend. You lived and worked very close to each other and had gotten to know each other very well. Merlin could never fail to make you laugh, and he loved your courage and honesty.
“I-I’m fine. Arthur and I just got into another fight. He can just be such an idiot sometimes, you know?” He shrugged, flopping back on his pillow. Merlin sighed, forcing a smile.
“And he finally went through on his threats and sacked me.” He laughed bitterly. “At least we know now that Arthur Pendragon, above all else, isn’t a liar.” His smile turned into a grimace.
“Everything will be alright, I’m sure.” You soothed, reaching to grab his hand. You took his hand in both your own and intertwined your fingers with Merlin’s. You squeezed his hand lightly. Much to your surprise, he pushed himself up into a seated positions and snaked his arms around you, enveloping you in a tight hug. You brought your arms up and wrapped them around his neck. The two of you sat like that for a while, you just holding him close.
“Thank you, Y/N, for listening to me. It seems like no one cares sometimes.” Merlin buried his head in your shoulder and you lightly rubbed his back.
“Oh, Merlin,” you whispered into his hair, “I care and I always will.”