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Toya has probably rolled over four times now on his bed. It's not late at night, nor is he tired. If anything, he's insanely restless with both excitement and anxiety.
Tonight, he gets to have a rare dinner with the Tenmas again. On Christmas Eve, no less.
This used to be a common place tradition for them, a frequent occurrence. But as time passed and Saki grew more ill and the problems with his father arose more and more, they had more or less grown as a distant memory of the past. He figures the mother of the Tenmas had decided it wouldn't be for the best with the arguments they were having, but now as the smoke has mainly cleared up it seems to fit perfectly.
Which is why he's currently stuck unable to relax on his bed, brain so muddled he can't even pick up a book to reread.
He has attempted to get the jitters out with extra practice, to which the rest of Vivid BAD Squad just told him to go home. He's paced his room at least ten times now, he's even tried composing a song based on his feelings. Things like the happy jitters, the arm shaking he feels he needs to do, slight worries for how tonight goes, the support he knows he'll feel at this party...
It's all just too enthralling. He's a little overwhelmed, if he's honest with himself.
December is a wonderful time of year. The air is always chilly enough that he feels the need to heat up, but it's not a problem with his partner around. Practicing, performing, singing in general all has this different, pulsing feeling surrounding it. Maybe it's because he met Akito near this time, or it's that he can practice more and more until he's left warm and breathless under the cold, but either way he loves this season.
It was also the one where his father and brothers would perform the most. He associates this time with wonderful songs, with melodies perfected through carved hours of practice. The type he once strived for.
He breathes in as deeply as he can, feeling the muscles in his body finally relax. He's been so tense this entire time. He's practically memorized the exact view from outside his window, the exact trees and how they sway in the freezing breeze.
He misses going outside. He kind of wants to keep practicing, which is oddly similar to his partner. He and Akito have been so passionate recently, and considering they're going to America..
....Akito isn't one to celebrate Christmas that seriously. Surely he'd be willing to call? Surely.
"Hey partner." Akito's voice rings out. "Lemme guess, you got too excited?" He can hear the shuffling of his partner's sheets, which tells him that he wasn't interrupting something important. Thank goodness, he'd be upset if he did.
Although, he does have to reply. He huffs, "Unfortunately, yes. I've been completely restless." He rolls over onto his side, the book he attempted to read falling towards him because of the dent he causes in the mattress.
"I don't quite know what to do...."
A chuckle sounds out of his phone. "Well, tell me about it. What's got you all hyped up?"
"The food, I don't know what they'll make but I know the Tenmas are very good at cooking. And... I wonder if we'll play card games. It'd be nice to play some with them and you around someday, Akito. Also... There's the thing I mentioned to you earlier." He babbles on, rambling quicker than he can think.
"Why'd you make the thing sound so ominous, man." Akito huffs amused.
Toya's heart pulses, hands trembling. He thinks it might be why he's so restless to go. "I think if I mention it by word, I might burst." is how he expresses the feeling. Akito's sigh is heard audibly, a fond sound, before the sheets shuffle again.
"Good or bad burst? Overwhelmed with happiness or getting second doubts?"
He hasn't thought of that yet.
"I'm not sure.. I'm happy and I want to push forward but..." But what? There's no reason to..
Akito hums. "Well, no matter what you've got my approval, partner. I know you'll do good, you always do. Plus, you've worked hard and put your mind to this. Y'know what that means, right?"
"...That it'll end up happening." Toya knows this, that his resolve can push enough for him. So, he tries to pile as much confidence as he can into his heart, mentally cramming it in as much as possible, soaking up Akito's encouragement while he's at it.
Akito laughs, and Toya wants more of it. If only his partner could come with him to the party... Having Akito there would be an extra layer of reassurance, although considering his dad would be there... Maybe not? Would he be fine with Akito...
His thoughts are cut off by a loud muffled scream. Ena must be calling Akito down...
"You've got this, partner. I believe in you more than anyone." Toya can hear the bed creak as Akito stands up. A muffled 'SHUT UP I'M COMING' sounds out, until Akito whispers "See ya, Toya." and hangs up, leaving Toya in his quiet room once more, smiling like an idiot.
I've got this. Whatever happens, happens.
He still jitters thinking about it, though.
She's practically about to burst running through the mall!
She firstly needs to get their curry ingredients for their super cool plan Aoyacurry! Her and Tsukasa decided this together, proudly explaining to their parents they had done so well the last time and clearly should make more together. Even if she isn't confident in her cooking to the max now, this is important progress to her future perfect confidence in the kitchen!!
But besides that, she needs to get something for Toya!!
The Aoyagis were kind of a last minute inclusion, something that they had decided on a whim when the mom of the Aoyagis had kindly asked. And who was her mom to say no, especially to such a close family friend!!
The only problem with this is she is now empty handed for gifts for them and needs to get them something... She had always imagined last minute gift shopping as a kid when she would lean over her hospital bed, listening to the people walk by, talk about their exciting Christmas plans. Things she wouldn't get to do at the time, things like running around like this with the last minute stress and getting to share it with friends.
...
She shouldn't be thinking like this on Christmas day!!! She has more important things to do!!!
The Aoyacurry ingredients are easy enough. They mostly have them at home anyway, so she takes her time grabbing the freshest carrots that have the least icky bits on them and an extra potato, just in case!! She asked her mom about the recipe again just to make sure before she left, but nothing really of note to add! Aside from removing a few things for budget purposes... Some extra snacks too for her and Tsukasa during the cooking process, and a few things for Toya too!!
She's sure he'll love the cookies here. She always does, and as a kid she'd get them a ton when she was at home, being fed by an overly happy Tsukasa.
She remembers being just as happy to be back home, sleeping on her own bed for once instead of a sterile one felt so good, and she remembers waking up the next morning with those funny markings when you sleep really well covering her whole arm...
Her warm feelings follow her as she happily walks past a few clothing stores. She'd love to get Toya some fresh clothes, dress him up all handsomely but from what she's heard his partner does that enough for him to not need it. She's still considering it anyway.
She'd stop at the arcade but everyone at this point is well aware of Toya's massive collection from the arcade, a lot of which currently sleep in her bed with her!! Maybe some new CDs, but she doesn't really know which songs he already has and asking would be too obvious. Although, she might just go for it anyway too!! She'd told herself maybe some new books, but they have different reading tastes and she doesn't really know who to ask... maybe Mizuki would know? Oh!! She should definitely ask then!!!
As she goes to whip her phone out, she catches a small glimpse of gray hair.
Shiho?!?!
She rushes over there as quickly as possible, seeing her friend jump and sigh, before stopping in place. Typical Shiho, it really is her!!!!
"Shiho!!! What are you doing here?" Saki beams, grabbing Shiho's hand as quickly as she can.
Her friend's face gets warm, looking away for a second before looking back. "I'm... buying things for Shizuku. She needed new things for her streams so..."
Saki truly loves her friends. Last night they had a sleepover together in the School SEKAI, talking endlessly all night like it was nothing!! Honami helped Ichika brush her hair but it never went down, Saki got to dress Shiho up all fancy...
She's really glad they can spend time together like this, with the Virtual Singers and all... Even if she had to fight for her life with Tsukasa so that he thought she was just gonna be sleeping really hard and that's why she'll be completely quiet. And to not wake her up. Even if he was a little suspicious.
That's not the point!!
"Well, I'm currently trying to buy gifts for Toya!! I have so much in min-"
"Saki," Shiho sighs, "Let me help you buy them. Knowing you, you'll run out of money just impulsively buying things. Just like your brother."
"Hey!! Onii-chan doesn't always impulsively buy things y'know!!!! He can make those decisions just fine..." She knows he can, he has before!! And she's sure he did too back when she was in the hospital and he'd have to sometimes take care of himself.
Her bassist smiles teasingly. "Notice how you didn't defend yourself?"
"Shihoooo!!!"
"Let's just go. What do you have in mind?" Even with the teasing, Shiho can be so helpful and caring sometimes!!
Maybe, -- no, definitely-- they can spend more holiday breaks like this! Where Shiho helps her buy the right presents, and Honami spends her time making them all pies while Ichika bashfully gives them presents.... Well, she doesn't know if those last two will happen this year but!!!
But... She's really glad to have all these opportunities. She smiles fondly at everything at the store from how warm her heart feels. Even if it gets her weird looks from her friend..
It takes them around 30 minutes to get the gifts due to Saki's inability to choose when Toya quite literally deserves the entire world...
"There, you've got everything you need." Shiho hands her the bags she diligently had filled with his CDs and books earlier, checking her phone before sighing. "I've gotta decode whatever Shizuku sent me now. Wish Toya a Merry Christmas from me and I wish you both luck tonight."
"Will do and we won't even need luck with how incredible we're going to do!!" She does a laugh kinda resembling Tsukasa. "Thank you so so much again Shiho!!! You're the best ever ya know!" She can't help but yell out.
She sees her bassist smile a bit. "Say that after we make another big wave, Saki." And with that, Shiho walks away coolly.
She loves when Shiho is confident like that. Thank the stars for having her in her life! She'll share the same sky as all of her friends tonight. The feeling warms her chest a little, like the feeling of seeing the stars herself.
Speaking of stars, her brother must be waiting for the food by now!! She's gotta run for sure!!!!!
He paces around his room, rereading the script one more time, over and over again!! It was perfect that they needed ingredients, no matter how much he wished he could've accompanied his dear sister on her journey to the mall, because now he can prepare a bit more!!!
Not that he needs it!! Rui and him had ironed out the wrinkles quite well, having Rui act out Saki while encouraging Nene to play Toya. And now he has an interactive Christmas play!!!
Yes yes, he is so incredibly ingenious!
He had received help from his dear director to make this, as he recommended Christmas plays for him to follow, in which Tsukasa very inventively stirred them all together in one big mixing pot to make the perfect story!!!! He is sure his wonderful family and the Aoyagis will enjoy this very much. Rui directed his character to be perfect to everyone's standards after gaining a tad bit more information on the Aoyagis.
Rui truly knows best when it comes to giving him roles. Tsukasa is also no stranger to playing solo shows, having mastered them to perfection as a child for Saki!! He had of course trusted his dear director to give him a role, maybe even a challenge!
Alas, this time, Rui hadn't. He had smiled kindly at him, telling him that he got to act his preferred role this time around, and to put his everything into it. "They'll love Tsukasa for him," he had said, "It is Saki and Toya we're talking about, after all."
He nearly melted on the spot. Turned into a pile of stardust in a flash. But!!!! He is stronger than that!!
And now, he paces over and over, repeating the same three lines over and over again in his head. He will get this right no matter what!!!! His stardom shall be on display for even the Aoyagi's parents! He has to focus.
"Onii-chan!!!!! I'm back!!" He hears.
Oh heavens. His wonderful sister is back before he finished rehearsing. He might be doomed.
No!!!! Tsukasa, have confidence in yourself!!! You are a star. That and Rui has your back, there's no way you can fail.
He hastily (and neatly) shoves his papers away. "Coming Saki!!!!!"
Yeah! He's got this. He's a master at his craft.
The show is completely wiped out of his mind halfway into the prepping stage of making this curry as he watches his talented sister cut the carrots like they've injured her friends. He doesn't think he's ever been more scared of her. Well.. he's sure he's seen worse before!! And with a little guidance and a shriek he lets out when she almost cuts her finger, she's back on track!!
He's incredibly proud of how much his little sister has grown over time. She hasn't had very many chances to do things like this, so even if she's actively causing herself harm over it the hard work is very admirable!! He truly hopes his sister can cook more things. She isn't completely hopeless with directions and he's sure she'll make it to the point of being able to do things while alone to max capacity in the future!!! He's sure of it!!!!
"Onii-chan... could you dice the onion for me?" She whines, and although Tsukasa is sure she should do it herself...
He can't help himself to her sad pouty face. "Of course!!! Keep peeling the potatoes in my steed then."
The way she lights up as she runs to go do the work truly makes his day shine as brightly as him. Hopefully Toya will smile like this later too, he can't help but grin thinking about that happening himself!
His parents come home by the time they're nearly done, Toya and the Aoyagis following behind. He feels pity they never got to see Saki's victory stance after clearing the third potato of its thin peel.
"My, oh my! Seems we've got quite the meal ready." His dad laughs, but the Aoyagi's father only nods along. Tsukasa assumes he must be happy though!! How could he not be at their marvelously made meal?!?
Saki snickers. "How could we not!! With such esteemed guests, we had to!" She sounds just like him!! He could almost cry from the pride swelling in his heart.
"Yes!! Truly so!!! Come, come, sit down!!" He gestures to their beautiful couch, the one he filled with as many 'Tsukasa' pillows as possible! The Aoyagis nod respectfully, with the mother calmly dropping her cookies off on the table near their currently simmering pot, and he finds himself internally cheering. There's a reason Toya likes these so much!!
"I hadn't expected you guys to have food done so quickly... Thank you for such kind hospitality." The mother thanks, before his mom waves her off, saying "We didn't know either!! They just said they'd be cooking for us."
Heh. Yeah they had. Ever since they made that magnificently done curry earlier this year for Toya, they knew they had to do it again to wow them!!!
Speaking of Toya, he seems oddly antsy. Happy, but antsy.
Hm. He wants to investigate, see if everything's alright, but he really does not want to make a scene when there is such high quality curry at risk!!! He cannot ruin Aoyacurry after all!
"We made it to appeal to your tastes as much as possible!!!" He shouts while he turns off the element, "Now line up!!! Your first serving of curry is incoming!!!"
She pulls Toya aside after the meal, checking his nerves about this.
"Are you sure? You can back out if you want and I'll just play the piano solo." She is genuinely worried. With Toya's past, and his parents there, she can't blame him for backing down.
They've been really quiet the entire night, but from her understanding and experience they're usually like that. Still, Toya had been noticeably shifty during supper, even spilling a bit of curry on his poor white turtleneck.
The way he nods slowly doesn't help her nerves either. Jeez!! She thought she'd only ever feel like this about her performing and sharing her feelings... Not something like this!!
She won't leave Toya like that though. No one should ever be alone.
Toya inhales shakily, eyes catching hers. "I... I can do this. I can't run forever, and I think Tsukasa's face would make the whole thing worthwhile."
He's so cool. Saki's just about to pinch his cheeks from how proud she is of him.
Of a Toya who can push forward no matter what!!! Of a Toya who can actively express his feelings and worries. She hugs him without a second thought, and he laughs warmly at it.
"We're gonna make Onii-chan smile so widely!!! And your dad's gonna think it's amazing too you know!!" His face visibly brightens at both mentions, and that makes her feel extra good about it! She knows they'll do amazing!! That's why they practiced!!
"Now, let's get on out there and perform!!!" She cheers, jumping up and down with Toya still in arms. Toya chuckles along with her bouncing, and it's the best feeling ever. She's gonna have to do this more often!! Smiles being shared like this feels incredible!
"Give me a bit," he says, "I just need to grab my violin from my bag."
His heart sounds out loudly in his chest as he walks into the main living room again. Saki's already sat in position on the piano, with all the attention on her.
Only his father turns around to look at him while she talks. He sees the reaction on his face when he sees what Toya is holding. It's the same one he's sure he's wearing right now, walking into the crowded room.
His ears pound with the sound of his heart, and he feels his breath hitch. Everything in his mind blurs, and he's hit with a sudden really strong feeling that he really can't do this.
"You've got this, partner. I believe in you more than anyone."
He's got to do this. For himself. So he can keep moving forward. He'll confront this head on.
"Saki. I'm ready." It comes out shakier than he'd like, but it works for now.
She smiles at him and nods, face more confident then he could ever muster, and she lifts up the piano lid. He hears several gasps his way as he places himself next to Saki.
"We have a gift for Onii-chan!!! Thank you for everything you've done for us this year, like going on that trip with me and the Hinomoris!!" Saki starts. He adds, "And you made me smile a lot all throughout the year, especially at school. Kamiyama is more lively with you around, Tsukasa."
Tsukasa already seems like he's going to cry from how happy he is. Toya feels a little lighter seeing it. Just focus on his happiness, on the joy spread in the room.
Saki whispers "You ready?" to him one last time, and he nods. There's a pit in his stomach, but he chooses to embrace it as he lifts the violin up into position.
"88 stars."
And they start.
Directly after he drops his hands from the violin, his hands start slightly trembling over the bow. Instinctively, he searches for his dad's expression, for that approval he's always wanted since he was a child. He feels a little dumb, considering he was over looking for him like this. Toya's grown up, he shouldn't still want attention like this. He shouldn't find himself lighting up over this approval, over the idea of the pit in his stomach being filled with a warm sensation.
His father nods approvingly, a slight smile. His heart melts in a millisecond, and he feels so filled with joy once again. He's missed this feeling so much, this feeling of burning warmth inside him, similar but not entirely to what he feels when he performs with Akito. He feels himself unconsciously smile, he's done it. He's managed to make his dad-
"You guys!!!!!! T-that was beautiful!!!!!" Loud sobbing comes from Tsukasa, to which he hears Saki giggle over. "C'mon... Onii-chan, you're overreacting!!!"
They get tackled by him as he spits out so many complements that neither of them can truly process it.
"Y..you both!! I have something for you too!!!! Just wait one second!!!!" And with that, Tsukasa runs off, nearly tripping over himself in the stairwell.
The mother of the Tenma's laughs. "I'm sure he's got something incredible planned."
"Of course he does, when does Tsukasa not?" Saki seems to share the same sentiment as him.
Despite how cold it is outside, he can't help but enjoy this other form of warmth. A familiar one, but it hasn't burnt as fervently in quite a bit.
Maybe, he can spend all his holidays like this from here on out.