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For the first time since they’d joined with Terezi and Vriska, Nepeta had emerged from her room for the express purpose of socializing. She had been shy at first, but now she was jabbering away with Terezi, chatting as though she hadn’t spent the last few weeks holed up in her respiteblock. Karkat watched them role-play, growing more irritated by the second.
It didn’t seem to matter that she didn’t have anything to say. She and Terezi were getting along famousely, as Nepeta would have put it, chattering about dragons and cats and hoofbeasts and hunting things, and as usual Nepeta either didn’t know or didn’t care that her partner in the game was being facetious. She was such a simpleton, and next to Terezi, she hardly seemed to have a brain at all. Her smile was honest, while the curl of Terezi’s lips suggested something calculative about her actions, even when they were benign. And the way she laughed so openly, while Terezi snickered in that sly but playful way...it was ridiculous. She was ridiculous. It pissed him off just how ridiculous she was.
They were both pissing him off. He couldn’t tell which was pissing him off more. Even Kanaya, who was sitting next to him reading a shitty rainbow drinker novella, was pissing him off.
But what made the situation infuriating was that none of them were paying him any attention. Terezi had expressed clearly enough that she was already fed up with his shit, and Nepeta had yet to make eye contact with him. Not even once. He saw her glance at him when she thought he wasn’t looking, but she wouldn’t look him in the eyes. She was still avoiding him, right there in front of his face, talking with the girl she knew he’d had a flushcrush on for his entire mature life. What was her deal? What was Terezi’s deal? What was Kanaya’s deal, for fuck’s sake? Even his ally-hopeful was acting cold.
He was trapped in a torture box, hurdling through space with a group of people whose sole purpose in life seemed to be to make him miserable.
They all jumped as the door flew open with a bang and Vriska entered, Aradia trailing behind her. Vriska surveyed the scene, and if she noticed the obvious hostility that was radiating from Karkat and Kanaya’s corner of the room, she chose to ignore it. “Listen up! This is your captain speaking,” she began, and Karkat rolled his eyes, already checking out of the conversation. He focused back on Nepeta and Terezi, and with a jolt, he noticed Nepeta had met his gaze. She glanced away immediately, and his scowl deepened. His irritation threatening to crack his skull, he turned his attention back to Vriska, hoping to every fake or real god that she had something that could qualify as good news.
“Aradia and I have been in cahoots for some time now, and we’ve decided that you can’t stay!” she continued, and Karkat could sense Kanaya stiffen next to him. So they had broken up after all. “It was nice seeing you all—a real blast—but you’ve been here long enough and frankly, we’re tired of you. Terezi and I have a happy kismesissitude to maintain and more irons in the fire than she can shake her fake walking stick at. So we’ve tricked Feferi into sending us a ship.”
“By that, she means Sollux is bringing us an unmarked ship as a gift from Feferi,” Aradia explained.
“Once it gets here, you can all go back to whatever the hell you were doing before we so graciously saved your asses.”
“You mean, we’re going back to visiting Equius?” Nepeta asked.
“Oh fuck no!” Karkat spat, standing up. “Fuck that plan. Fuck that plan so hard its ancestor’s genetic material flies back up all its reproductive organs.”
There was a beat of silence as they all stared at him. “You got a better plan, Karkat?" Vriska asked. "Because you sure as hell aren’t staying with us."
“As if I would want to stay here with two deranged bandits who spend most their time jerking each other off to the music of their own lies,” he said, shooting a glare at Terezi. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Nepeta watching him with a mixture of shock and confusion written on her face, and he felt his heart skip a beat. So she was finally paying attention. And what good timing—she was about to get a show.
“Now all you fuckers get to listen to me, got it? I got ship full of douchebags, a head full of aggravation, and two fucking sweeps worth of frustrated personal ambitions that need gratification in the near future or so help me I will throw myself out the fucking window and let you all deal with the intruding vacuum of space by yourselves. I did not wait this long to get off Alternia so I could frolic into the arms of that sweaty musclehouse, and I’m done wasting time. If we’re getting a ship, then we’re going to use it for something real, goddamn it!”
“Like what?” Vriska said. “Got some sightseeing planned?”
“What the fuck are you jeering at? Do you honestly think you’ve got anything better going for yourselves?” he asked, looking between her and Terezi. “Look at you two idiots, acting all high and mighty because you think you’re conducting some imaginary war against the Subjugglators to right some stupid personal grudges, when really all you’re doing is flying around stealing the pants off of any unfortunate fuck who you arbitrarily decide deserves it. Your whole persona is a joke, you know that? You’re nothing but goddamn pirates, plain and simple.”
“And you think you could do any better?” Vriska asked, and her challenge served to flame the fire of his ire.
“Yeah, as a matter of fucking fact, I think I could!”
“Oh, really? Stand back, everyone, Karkat has some awesome skills in conducting imaginary wars against Subjugglators! Just look at his qualifications! Hunting, drawing on walls, avoiding culling drones, the list goes on!” she said.
“Fuck you, I’m a born leader!”
“Are you? So where have you been all this time, Mr. Leader?”
“He’s been preparing!” Nepeta broke in, and all eyes turned to her. “We’ve been talking about this for a long time. It’s what he’s been planning to do since Conscription Day! Right, Karcat?”
“Uh...yeah,” he said, shock and something else disrupting the flow of coherent thoughts in his mind. Slowly recovering, he repeated, “Yeah, that’s right. We’ve talked about this. About fighting Subjugglators and taking up causes and proving ourselves and shit. This whole hemospectrum bullshit. It’s a load of garbage! There’s no fucking reason why someone with low blood should be worth a damn thing less than someone with high blood. Fuck ‘lowblood’ and ‘highblood’ and the fucking aristocracy and royalty and all that bullshit! A lowblood can do everything a highblood can do, if not better, and we’re going to prove it!”
“And how the hell do you plan to do that? Are you going to hold some friendly competitions with the highbloods? Going to rekindle the Troll Olympics to spread peace and harmony among the bloodcastes?”
“Fuck no, you can’t create equality through peace and harmony,” Karkat said. “We’re going to usurp the Subjugglators and take their place so that the Condesce has no choice but to recognize our talent.”
Vriska burst out laughing, but everyone else in the room watched Karkat, who stood his ground, grinding his teeth against Vriska’s mockery. “Do you honestly think that’s going to work? God, Karkat, I knew you were stupid, but this is almost beyond belief.”
“Shut up!” he snapped. “What the fuck makes you so much better? You’re not even fighting. You’re just taking out all your frustration and aggression on the Subjugglators’ underlings, who can hardly piss themselves correctly they’re so incompetent. You’re not even trying to take out the main target!”
“Yeah, moron, because we’re not trying to topple the foundations of troll society. We’re just trying to get a little old-fashioned revenge!”
“Actually,” Terezi interrupted, “that is what we’re trying to do. Remember our truce?”
Vriska was taken aback, but she quickly recovered, scowling. “That wasn’t part of our truce. Toppling the foundations of troll society wasn’t one of the conditions! I help you beat up bad guys, and you help me get revenge—that’s what our truce was about.”
“Aren’t they same thing?” Terezi asked. “You want revenge against the Subjugglators. I want to eradicate injustice. Karkat is proposing we eradicate injustice by dislodging the Subjugglators. All of our goals are the same.”
“No, Pyrope,” Vriska said. “Don’t get caught up in this bullshit. This idiot doesn’t even know what he’s talking about!”
“He does know what he’s talking about!” Nepeta insisted, jumping to Karkat’s defense. “If anyone can do this, he can! He’s good at this sort of thing!”
“How do you know if he’s good at it or not? Neither of you have done anything with your lives but throw a sweep long slumber party on Alternia for yourselves!”
“I know he can because he’s already doing it!” she said. “Look, he’s already got followers.”
“Yeah? Who?”
“Me!” she announced.
“And me,” Aradia added.
“And me,” Kanaya said.
“And me.” Vriska looked at Terezi in shock, and she smiled back.
“You traitor!” she said in disbelief. “I knew you were in cahoots with these assholes. You were planning to betray me all along, weren’t you?”
“I’m not betraying you,” Terezi said, her smile widening into a toothy grin, “because you’re in on this too.”
“Like hell I am!” Vriska snapped. “You can’t tell me what to do! I’m the captain of this ship! There is no way I’m listening to this dunce while he tries to figure out his blood-related inferiority complex!”
“You won’t have to. They’re taking another ship, remember?” Terezi said. “You’re still the captain. We’ll just be working together with them separately to dispense social justice with the ultimate goal of attacking the Subjugglators. It’s in the spirit of our truce. Unless you want to break it. In which case, I’ll be going with them, and you can consider us enemies again. Real enemies. And you know what that entails.”
She looked dumbfounded. “You can’t do that!” she said. Terezi smirked in response. Vriska growled, looking between her and the others, and she exploded, “Fine! Whatever! We’ll help you with your stupid, misplaced rebellion, but I’m pulling out the second they squash you.” With a sound of disgust, she turned and left the room.
The tension in the room dissipated, and what remained was a strange silence, awkward and a little overbearing. Karkat looked around him, feeling almost numb with shock. What had just happened? Was he really now the legitimate leader of a rebellion against the most basic system of organization in troll society?
He sat down, running his hand through his hair. He heard Aradia say something and was vaguely aware that she was leaving the room. He noticed Kanaya reposition her book and turn a page. But it all felt so strange after what had just transpired. He was consumed by astonishment. A huge feeling was growing in his chest and spreading through his limbs, and when it finally reached his think pan, it said to him, loud and clear: Hell fucking yes.
“Karkat,” he somehow heard Terezi say through his daze, and he looked over at her. “I hope you know what you’re doing, because I just invested a lot in this.”
Through his shock, he felt a slight pang of annoyance. “I got this, okay?” he responded. “I have all the skills necessary for this position, and we’re going to rock the fake noses of those Subjugglator assholes. Don’t get in the habit of doubting my authority.”
“We’ll see,” she said with a snicker, and she followed Aradia out of the room.
“Karcat!” Nepeta said, dropping into the seat next to him, and he jumped. She was smiling at him, and the expression of pure, joyous excitement on her face mirrored the emotion ringing around his head. “You’re doing it!”
“I know, I was right here the whole damn time,” he said, and she grinned.
“I’m so happy for you!”
“I—so am I,” he said, and his emotion edged his voice. “I didn’t think it would fucking happen, you know? I’d sort of just given up hope, but now, I mean, shit, it’s really happening.”
Without any warning, she threw her arms around him, gripping him in an exuberant hug. He stiffened with surprise, and she let him go, stuttering an apology. “Sorry! I guess I was just...I think things had gotten weird between us, and I’m just so happy that it’s all going to work out!” The whole time, despite her apology and explanation, she hadn’t stopped smiling.
“Yeah,” he said, feeling a sense of elation in his chest. “I guess things are gonna work out, aren’t they?” He paused and cleared his throat. “So, I guess that means you’re not going to go stay with your bulgegroping horsefucker of a moirail?”
“Nope!” she said. “I hope he’s not too upset...but I’ll find a way to tell him. It doesn’t matter what he thinks about it anyway. And, um...does this pawsibly mean you’re not going to stay with Terezi?”
He felt a strange but not altogether horrible feeling flicker through him. “Yeah, I guess that’s what that means,” he said. He watched her try and fail to repress the pleased smile that was playing at the corners of her mouth, and, feeling an uncomfortable heat rising on his cheeks, he slipped his hand over hers.
Neither of them had noticed that Kanaya was listening to their conversation, slipping glances in their direction. She returned to her book, a small, bittersweet smile on her lips.