Chapter Text
Nicole’s girlfriend is pathetic.
Well… She's not terrible. Most of the time, Ari does whatever Nicole tells her as long as she gives the fake red head kisses and nods along to whatever stupid shit she has to say.
Ari’s also a pathetic, spineless worm who goes along with whatever because she’s too busy thinking about Nicole’s ass.
Okay, that’s a bit much. That almost makes her sound like Jeffery.
However annoying she might be, Ari does not deserve being compared to that thing.
But it doesn’t change that Ari is chained to Nicole, having to drag around (and be dragged by) this pathetic dead-weight.
Case in point: Their first date. Ari decided to pick up Nicole in her shitty car and drive to the shitty movie theater. Homeless bum stinking up the entrance, asking for spare change. Rat piss mixed with something chemical stinking up the inside. God awful snoring coming from the direction of the bathroom. Ari shakily offering movie tickets to her own girlfriend like she’s being mugged. And to top it all off, being stone-cold sober.
Yep.
…This is gonna be a shitty date.”
“N-Nicole!”
She blinked, “Oh, sorry. Did I say that out loud? Because it’s true, and you know it… What are we even watching?”
Ari fidgeted uncomfortably, shoving the ticket into Nicole’s hand, “F-Friday… the 13th…”
“Okay, what is it?” Nicole stuffed the paper into her pocket, “Shitty rom-com?”
“Horror movie.”
“Oh right. All the other kids were talking about it...” An awkward silence fell between the two of them, “So- you uh… like horror?”
“I… I don’t think so…?”
Nicole felt her eye twitch, “Bitch, did you drag me all the fucking way to a horror movie as an excuse to put your hands all over me!?”
Ari looked away with a blush, “...Well… I-If you… wa-want… Y-You can d-do the same to me-”
“Uh-uh. Nope. You got nice tits, but they aren’t enough to carry me through a whole movie in this stank ass theater. No. If we’re gonna keep doing this, I need to have some fun.”
“Like… What?”
“Well…” Nicole looked around the lobby, “I’m not doing this sober… And it’s… Thirty fucking minutes before the movie starts… Yep. That’s enough time.”
“Enough time for what?”
“Neither of us can pass for twenty one, but check out fat-ass over on the couch there,” Nicole nodded over at the couches next to the bathroom, at an overweight slob dressed in a fine suit and snoring loudly with bottles littered around him.
“What about him?”
“Oh my god, shut up and listen. This dude dresses nice, brings his own twelve-pack, passes out on the lobby couch, snores like a lawnmower, and the security guard over there doesn’t move an inch. Fat-ass is obviously some big-shot. Security would probably throw our asses out for disturbing his beauty sleep.”
“I don’t… follow…” Nicole sighed at her girlfriend’s stupidity.
“It’s simple. I distract Mister Security, you go and snatch whatever beer’s left.”
“Nicole!” Ari hissed at her, “That’s stealing!”
“Only if you get caught.”
“A-And what if I get caught!?” Ari whined.
“We’re kids,” Nicole rolled her eyes, “Worst-case, they let us off with a warning.”
Ari pouted, glaring at her, “Why can’t you be the one to steal the beer-!? Wait. Why the hell do you want his warm half-drunk beer!?”
“Ari, look over to his side. There’s at least two unopened bottles in the pack there. And you need to grow a pair. This’ll help a little.” Not a lot, but it’s something.
“How is this your idea of fun?” Ari groaned, the sound of defeat.
“Because while I’m chatting up security over there, I get to watch you squirm as you commit baby’s first crime. This is already infinitely more fun than waiting around in rat-piss lobby.”
“...Fine.”
…Why the fuck is she just standing there looking at Nicole like that? “Get a move on already!”
“I-If I’m doing this… I want a kiss for good luck…”
“What-?” Nicole groaned, “Fucking- Come here. Mwah.” She pressed a kiss to her cheek. Ugh. Nicole had to suppress a grimace. The cheap foundation felt slimy on her lips.
“Love you! Please don’t let me get caught!” Ari almost skipped away.
She’ll have to fight the urge. Entertaining as it would be, she doesn’t want Ari sobbing the whole drive back.
Turning around and walking over to the security guard, Nicole positioned herself so that she’d have a good view of Ari, her girlfriend’s heist to his back if the guy turned towards her. Now to figure out something- wait…
“Hey, weird question, don’t I know you from somewhere…?” The cop inclined his head at her, sunglasses reflecting the dim light.
“I don’t think so, Miss-”
“Oh shit! Yeah wait, you uh- patrol the mall don’t you?” It actually was the fucker Nicole always had to keep a lookout for. Security finally turned to look at her.
“I do indeed. Spend a lot of time there? I certainly don’t recognize you.” Of course not. Nicole had a policy of not spending time with cops, wannabe cops, and narcs. Ari was sweating bullets, looking around in the most suspicious manner as she inched towards the black-out drunk.
“Yeah, I think we just always are in different places,” She had his usual route memorized for minimal contact, “So your name… Mister Security?”
“Yep.”
“What?”
“That’s my name.”
“Your name is… Mister… Security…” Nicole’s eye twitched yet again as her girlfriend reached toward the pack at a snail’s pace, “...Did you… always have that name…?”
“Of course! My momma gave me it!”
“...Her last name was… Security…?”
“That’s Misses Security to you! Not to be confused with Misses Security, the bitch wife. God bless my mother’s withered soul…” The cop reached up and rubbed his eyes beneath the aviators, sniffling, “Miss her every day. Only good thing that ever was a part of this town…”
“Right…” Her eyes flicked over to Ari, who was finally walking away from the lard, “Well uh… have a good day… Mister… Security…”
“Y-You too citizen! I-I… I gotta go! I-I can sense some troublemakers v-vandalizing the bathroom!” He turned away, hiccuping and walked to the bathroom, passing Ari who looked at Nicole questioningly.
“What did you say to him…?”
“Struck up a conversation about his dead mom. You get it?” Ari shifted her purse, revealing the glass of two bottles as they clinked.
“Holy shit, you know some subtlety. I thought you’d straight-up grab the case and make a run for it. How’s it feel being a criminal?”
“I-It’s… a rush…” Ari smiled, “It’s kinda addicting.”
“I know, right? Maybe I should take you to the mall sometime...”
“Can we go watch the movie now?”
“Nope,” Nicole rolled her eyes, “We still got twenty-five minutes.”
“What!?”
“Well, your dicking around took two, your whining took up three, and the actual theft took less than thirty seconds. So yeah. Twenty-ish minutes to burn.”
“...So… What do you want to talk about…?”
“Talk?” Nicole scoffed. She could reasonably milk out one more entertaining thing out of her girlfriend without consequences, “Fuck that, we’re on a roll. Let's have some more fun!”
“...Okay… Like what…?”
Nicole grabbed Ari by the arm, “Let’s go fuck with the hobo.”
“Damn, this bitch is empty…” Nicole looked around the darkened theater, “Ah, fuck.”
“What?” Ari whispered back, for some fucking reason. Nobody was here, and the movie wasn’t even on yet.
Nicole held up her bottle, “I can’t open this.”
Ari grabbed it from her and rummaged around her purse, bringing out a Swiss-army knife and using the bottle opener. After a moment, Ari took out her own beer and cracked hers too.
“‘Preesh… You normally take your first date to a horror movie?”
“No, but my first dates always try to take me there.”
“Ohh…” Now things were starting to make sense, “Yeah. Men think women are pussies that can be manipulated by a little gore… I thought you didn’t watch horror?”
“I don’t. Always ended up watching something else. But I mean… It’s my first time dating a girl, so I thought I’d try something a little different.”
“So you thought you’d try getting an excuse to grope me.”
“No!” Ari flushed violently, “I-I mean… I-I thought about it a little on the ride over, but I really just wanted to try something a little outside my comfort zone.”
“Uh-huh… You know you’re a spineless coward, right?”
She flinched, “Yeah…?”
“I don’t want to be seen with a spineless coward,” Ari instantly deflated, eyes filling with tears at Nicole’s words, “So let’s work on that spine. Give you a cardboard one, at least.”
“...Please don’t play with my heart like that.”
“Your first task,” Nicole ignored her girlfriend, “Is to watch the whole movie with your eyes open and full attention.”
“Wh-What!?”
“I’ll be quizzing you about it after. If you get anything wrong, especially the gory or spooky scenes- we are never watching a movie together again.”
“S-Seriously!?”
“Yep,” Of course not. But it’d keep Ari’s hands to herself, and focused on the movie. Nicole wasn’t nearly drunk enough to get groped in a shitty theater, “So pay attention. I think the movie’s coming on now.”
The movie was surprisingly fun. It wasn’t nearly close to the best movie she’d ever seen, but there were enough pretty faces and blood to keep her mind occupied. The gore wasn’t always the most realistic, but it did its job. Smeared and splattered into little chunks… Dripping from the walls as Nicole stood there in shock-
God, what a fucking downer her brain was. That beer wasn’t nearly enough.
As for Ari…
“Hey Nicole…?”
“Yeah?”
Ari stretched, seemingly relaxed, “I think I like seeing pretty women getting fucked up.”
“...Jesus fucking christ…”
“Th-That came out wrong… Oh god- I-I didn’t mean…”
Nicole sighed, “You don’t mean like them getting chopped up, right?”
“NO!”
“Then it’s fine,” Nicole snorted, “Just a red flag.”
“...Can we see another horror movie some time?”
“Sure. As long as it’s as entertaining as this one.”